Jehovah’s Witnesses Hopelessly Await Armageddon, the End of the World…..

…Armageddon is when Jehovah, the God of the Bible destroys everyone on earth who is not one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

From the Watchtower of 9/1/89, page 19:

Only Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.

The “impending end of this doomed system” is Armageddon. So, this event was “impending” in September of 1989, 22 years ago as of this writing.

But 18 years earlier, or about 40 years ago, as of this writing they said:

”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

So, “shortly” is 40 years? Borrow a hundred bucks from a Witness and tell him you’ll pay him back “shortly”.

But it gets even better….or worse, depending on your point of view:

Also, at age 18 I was reading this from the Jehovah’s Witness Awake magazine, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

From the same Awake, page 15:

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

Well, I turned 60 this year and am considering retiring. I have a degree as I attended college over the objections and “counsel” of Jehovah’s Witness Elders. So, I have fulfilled a career, in fact I have started and sold five companies and I am working on a fifth, which I may or may not do, as I have more than enough to retire. I just don’t want to right now. My “career” and thus my success and present favorable financial position were due in a large part to my degree.

So, in my case the Watchtower was wrong. I know many Witnesses from my generation who did not go to college and instead devoted their lives to the Watchtower Society and its teachings. Oops, the Watchtower Society has no retirement plan. Sorry about your luck.

These poor suckers fell prey to the Watchtower “Armageddon is just around the corner” bullshit.

Assholes

 

The End of the World

 

It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine

From the R.E.M. song, “It The End of The World”

 

Boy, Jehovah’s Witnesses are having a field day with the latest world events. And I think I agree with them on certain aspects.

Obama is obviously out to destroy to United States capitalist system and turn the US into a European style Socialist State. He may even have higher aspirations, like becoming a dictator and naming himself President for Life.  If you read all the stuff out there about what’s going on, not just the lame stream media, but FOX news as well and read up on The Cloward and Piven Plan and Saul Alinsky’s “Rules for Radicals”, it should become obvious that Obama is following their strategy to the letter.

And what is that, you may ask? Over load the economy with bloated government and debt until it crashes. When it can no longer pay entitlements, you have a vast army of “now not being paid” welfare recipients, food stamp users, illegal aliens and other such blood sucker that you can turn on “the rich”, cause widespread chaos, seize our guns and Obama can be the hero to the rescue with a “New America”.

In the meantime, we lose sight of Iran and other such rogue states amassing nuclear arsenals, China and Russia’s growing militarism, Islam gaining a strong foothold in many countries and a host of other such stuff that the US, by its very presence and power now keeps in check.

Islam is not a religion. It’s a socio-economic system, a government, with its own set of rules, i.e. Sharia Law. Its stated purpose is to convert or kill everyone in the world. And it is making progress.

The end of the world. Very possible.

Well, time for the Jo Ho’s to get in high gear as they await the end, which has been “just around the corner” for decades.

For example, they predicted the end of the world would happen at seven distinct times in the 20^th Century. I personally was a Jo Ho and lived through the last three predictions, 1) 1975, 2)before the end of the 20^th Century and 3)before the generation born in 1914 died off.

Of course none of this happened. So, now there is no Jo Ho defined time, date or time period. Just the general “it’s right around the corner”.

Well, I would guess that if you predict the end of the world enough times, you are bound to be right once. If you are the Jo Ho’s it just might not happen as you expect. In short they expect God to destroy the world, kill everyone but Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Jo Ho’s will live on a cleansed paradise earth. Oh and they will be perfect and immortal. Great work, if you can get it.

Sorry, JW’s but after you record of being 100% wrong I would have to say that you are basically still full of shit. Oh, the world may “end” in some sort of nuclear holocaust, initiated by any number of scenarios, there may be a worldwide epidemic, there may be a prolonged ground war between Islam and the non crazy people and again there are many non nuclear scenarios.

Likely there will be survivors and civilization will be altered or changed completely. But an earth populated by all the Jo Ho’s, ruled by God and everyone living disease free and remaining young forever? Not likely.

More like a ravaged countryside with roving bands of people either trying to survive or violently preying on the weak. Perhaps there will be portions of countries that still exist trying to expand their territory. Whichever of the numerous possible scenarios play out, basically the prospect are very unpleasant.

If you are not prepared and have the resolve to protect yourself and your loved ones, likely you will be someone’s prey. Civil unrest, violent armed confrontation and perhaps racial wars are coming to the US and many parts of the world.

I chuckle to myself whenever I think of the arrogance of the Jehovah’s Witnesses: “Yes God is going to only save us. He is going to kill the rest of humankind.”

I know this is their thoughts as I used to be them and that’s what they are taught. Keep thinking that way, Jo Hos. You’ll be the first prey.

Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit…..continued.

I’ve been getting a lot of shit from Jehovah’s Witnesses on blogs and comment’s I make on articles about the now bullshit rapture thing from that asshole in California.

When I answer on these blogs or articles, I usually refer to myself as an ex Jehovah’s Witness who is no stranger to “end of the world “bullshit as the Witnesses have predicted the “end of the world “ or Armageddon seven times in the Twentieth Century.

“Oh no, that’s not true, you apostate son of a bitch” the Witnesses will reply. They don’t use these exact words but you get the point. And I am an Apostate fucking asshole, thank you very much. My late mother was, until her death, a  deluded Jehovah’s Witness and she was not a bitch. Deluded and religiously phsyco, but not a bitch.

So I have put together a canned response to Jehovah’s Witnesses, which I will start posting today, quoting three of their prophetic spewing that I personally lived through, with quotes from their own literature so they can check form themselves.

Jehovah’s Witnesses predicted that Armageddon would come in 1975. I lived this. Here is a quote from “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

So what would make anyone sell all their stuff in 1974? And the Watchtower Society/Jehovah’s Witnesses ask : “Does that not warm our hearts?’.

Also, check your Watchtower, October 15, 1969, pages 622-3.

They also said it would come before the end of the 20th Century. In 1971, in the Book “The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah” – How? 1971 p. 216 it says:

”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”.

Also, at age 18 I was reading this from the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

Also, we have this from The Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

In 1995, they changed their interpretation again, from the Watchtower,  11/1/95, pg 19-20

So from their own literature they predict the end of the world:  1) in 1975 2) before the end of the 20^th Century and 3) before the gen alive in 1941 died off.

All bullshit. So to Jehovah’s Witnesses, I say look it up on your Watchtower Library CD. Read it and weep, deluded fuck heads.

 

Bible Bullshit: Time to Put Up Or Shut Up, Bible Assholes

Well, today is Saturday, May 21, 2011, rapture day, according to  Pastor Harold Camping and his loyal band of psycho fuck heads.

I sit in my recliner, with my laptop and a 12 pack of Corona  Light. I may switch to Crown and Seven-Up later on, if the world doesn’t end.

Just to clarify, Camping says that we are going to have sort of a “rolling  rapture” as God’ Chillin’ are taken to heaven, time zone by time zone. I don’t remember  if he mentioned in which time zone this would start. Is heaven on Eastern  Standard Time? Who the fuck knows.

He did say that at 6 p.m. Saturday (local time around the world) the “saved” would  ascend to heaven. Technically, that hour has come and gone in the Pacific  islands, New Zealand, Australia, and on through east Asia. No word yet about people ascending.

Oh yea, and after that the world will be destroyed  in a variety of ways, including but not limited to: Earthquakes, floods,  syndication of “Dancing with the Star” (known to cause inexplicable mass  suicides), McDonalds new dollar menu (proven to kill slowly)  and Wal-Marts new policy to arm their  greeters.

As usual, other competing Christians complain that Camping is  totally full of shit and the Bible doesn’t support his prophesy at all. For  example, the eBible Fellowship, says on their website: http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/,
that he Bible says the end of the World  will be October 21, 2011. One crazy ass demented religious group calling another  crazy ass demented religious group wrong.

Also, we have the Mayan thing which is sometime in 2012. I can’t  keep track of all of them.

At any rate, It’s a safe bet that since I don’t believe in Jesus  and I don’t think the Bible is from God,  I will not be “taken”.  If so I would have run up my credit cards and taken a shot at a few of women that I secretly lust after. But alas, I am not to be included.

We’ll all have a laugh Sunday, at Camping’s expense.

But, it does give me pause because at some point, one of these  doomsday prophesies is likely to be right.

Bible Bullshit to the Max

So the world will end tomorrow, Saturday, May 21, 1911. It seems Harold Camping, the 89-year-old leader of the ministry Family Radio Worldwide, has predicted that the destruction of humanity, which will happen over five months, beginning on the 21st.

“Whereas this five-month period will be an enormous horror story for those who have not been raptured, it will be a time of great joy and wonder for those who are raptured,” so saith the prophet Harold.

Of course, Prophet Harold uses a mathematical formula linked to prophecies in the Bible. One time before he predicted Sept. 6, 1994 as Judgment Day, but nothing happened. You’d think that would be enough to dissuade old Harold (and He is old) but no. If anything He is persistent.

Back in ’94, old Hal and his merry band of deluded Bible- tards took out an ad in Reader’s Digest, stating: “The Bible guarantees the end of the world will begin with Judgment Day May 21, 2011.”

Being raised a Jehovah’s Witness, I am no stranger to end of the world predictions. The Jo Hos predicted the end of the world or Armageddon would come seven different times in the 20th century and of course nothing happened. Another loony group of Bible fuck heads and another in a long series of loony prediction that “The Bible guarantees.”

But I digress. Ol’ Harold says that “The Rapture” AKA, “the taking up into heaven of God’s elect people will take place on May 21, 2011 at 6 p.m. local time the rapture will sweep the globe time zone by time zone and that the end of the world as we know it will take place five months later on October 21, 2011.”

So I’m thinking, great! All the religious assholes will be taken to Heaven to be with Jeebus. Fuckin’ A!! Now we can buy liquor on Sunday and we’ll get porn on regular TV! Cool!!

John Lennon finally gets his wish, posthumously. From his song “Imagine”:

Imagine there’s no countries

It isn’t hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace

There is a catch. Old Harold says that after all God’s Chillin’ get taken to heaven, God will destroy the earth. Shit, there’s always a catch.

So, what will happen is what always happens, so saith the prophet ISNRBLOG….not a fucking thing. And come Sunday, all the religious assholes will still be here, I will still have to stock up on booze during the week and get my porn off the net like always.

Fuck you Harold. Oh yea, some people are planning Rapture parties, because as one group of assholes says, quote “skeptics, activists, comedians and others don’t believe his apocalyptic warning for one second.”

Holy shit, COMEDIANS DON’T BELIEVE THIS!! That settles it as far as I’m concerned. Hey, if comedians aren’t convinced, I mean it’s got to be bullshit.

Again, I digress.

Well, my best guess is that I’ll be posting things here as usual, since the Bible is bullshit and so was every nut ball prophesy religious shit heads have spewed about it since it was written. Oh yea, sorry for the infrequency of my posts lately. I have had a few projects lately but they are ending so my psychotic rantings should be coming at a more regular pace.

Try to suppress your impulse to screech with joy.

Religious Bullshit: God Exists and Religionists are Absolutely Sure

It’s an old story. In 1899 the head of the U.S. Patent Office sent his resignation to President McKinley urging the closing of the office because “everything that could be invented has been invented.” It’s been told and retold so often that even President Reagan used it in a speech.

The “quote” is often attributed to Charles H. Duell, who was Commissioner of Patents in 1899. However,  Duell was, in fact, far from pessimistic about the future of new inventions and patents. He even encouraged Congress to improve the patent system.

It seems evident that some of his comments were taken out of context. There was another Patent Office commissioner whose statements may have been taken out of context. In an 1843 letter to Congress, Henry L. Ellsworth emphasized the rapid growth in the number of patents and stated that he expected patent activity to increase. Somehow, his statements may have been misconstrued.

But still, it illustrates the occasional arrogance of man, when we assume we have “The answer.”

One story, with a similar theme, is true.  The United States District Attorney sued the inventor, Lee De Forest for fraud (in 1913) on behalf of his shareholders, stating that his claim of regeneration was an “absurd” promise. Dr Forest was later acquitted.  We now know that not only was “regeneration” or feedback real, but it is one of the elements of physics that makes radio communication possible.  The problem was that people at the time simply couldn’t understand it. Technology was moving at such a fast pace, it was hard for the common man to keep up.

My point is that no one at that time or today can make an absolute statement about anything.

But that doesn’t stop religious assholes. We have this from WSMV-TV in Nashville”

Here’s the link: http://www.wsmv.com/news/13358825/detail.html

The headline is: “Professor: Science Proves God’s Existence. Proof Comes with “Hard  Nose Physics”, Professor Says.

By TomRandles:

Nashville Tenn: A controversial college physics professor claims he can prove God Exists.

“God is the cosmological singularity. I’m not being blasphemous. I’m just following the ancient tradition that says science put the tenant of religion to the experimental test, and we find God exists,” said Tulane University professor Frank Tipler.

He said he believes his findings are divine.

“It’s coming out not of paleontology or religious mysticism, but hard nose physics, which I like,” he said.

Ignoring the school of thought that science and religion are separate, Tipler uses hard core scientific principles like Einstein’s general relativity and quantum mechanics to make his point.

“What you can show using physics forces this universe to continue to exist. As long as you’re using general relativity and quantum mechanics, you are forced to conclude God exists,” he said.

Some local church leaders have seen Tipler’s presentation, including Hendersonville’s First Baptist Church the Rev. Glenn Weekley.

“That’s good to know and if that be true, and what he says is defensible and true, that’s wonderful. But, I don’t think it makes a lot of difference in the long run in what we believe and why we believe it,” he said.”

So dipshit Tipler says “As long as you’re using general relativity and quantum mechanics, you are forced to conclude God exists.” Do you think Tipler, an avowed Christian is in anyway influenced by his personal belief? Funny, scientists in general do not agree. Although, scientists in general do believe in intelligent design of some sort, there remains not a shred of real proof.

The indisputable fact is that there are no indisputable facts. We simply do not have enough science to prove or disprove anything. For decades science said that life as we know it could not exist without photosynthesis, until they discovered life, thriving deep in the ocean with no light, sustained by chemosynthesis.

Again the pitiful ramblings of the illogical religionists clang like a person banging two pots together as they try to convince everyone else to believe as they do.

Shitheads.

Have a Beer, Armageddon is Near!!

From The Watchtower 11/15/80, page 30: “The Bible shows that there will be only seven world powers in this sense, to correspond to the seven heads of the wild beast. (Rev. 13:1) There is rivalry and competition between the Anglo-American world power as the “king of the south” and the socialistic “king of the north,” but there is no indication in Scripture that the latter will replace the former as an eighth world power before both come to their end.—Daniel 11:40-45.”

The Witness contend that there the seven world powers of Bible history are Egypt, Assyria, Babylon, Medo-Persia, Greece, Rome and the Anglo-American or England and the United States. Notice the mention of the socialistic “king of the north,” and the statement that “there is no indication in Scripture that the latter will replace the former as an eighth world power before both come to their end”.

The Watchtower further elaborates:

The Watchtower, 12/1/74, page 718: “This “scarlet-colored wild beast” is an eighth “king,” an eighth world power. Since it “springs from the seven,” it is not the Communistic bloc of nations. Also, unlike the Communist bloc, ‘it was (for a while), then was not; it ascends out of the abyss (of inactivity) and goes off into destruction.’

Ok, so now the Jo Ho’s have an eighth world power which “springs from the seven”, but is not the Communistic bloc of nations.

So what does all this crazy bullshit mean? As per usual the Jo Ho’s have their multitudinous,intertwining prophesies, where they fit the square scripture in the round Witness belief hole.

Simply put, there were seven bible world powers, as named above. We are living in the time of the last, the Anglo American world power and Armageddon will come while this world power still dominates. Again note the Witness statement that “there is no indication in Scripture that the latter will replace the former as an eighth world power before both come to their end”.

So, the US will dominate the world until Armageddon comes.

Interestingly, we have this, from the Economist, of 4/1/2011 entitled “Overtaking”:

“NEARLY three-quarters of Americans wish China would “just hurry up and overtake America already,” according to a new survey by The Economist Simulation Unit, published on April 1st. Constant worrying about exactly when the superpower will fall into second place is causing anxiety throughout American society, the survey found. “Will it be 2015? 2020? 2025? I wish it would just happen, and then we could all stop agonizing about it and get back to dentistry,” said Adam Barnes, a dentist from Iowa. The report examines in detail the relationship between the two countries and finds that in some important fields, China has already surpassed America. A summary of the findings is presented below.”

http://www.economist.com/blogs/dailychart/2011/04/united_states_and_china

As a matter of fact, the Drudge Report Headline today is “Rise of The New World Power (Without the US)

So, it looks like the Anglo/American World Power, the United States/England are about to be usurped. But wait! That can’t be! The Witnesses say that there will not be an eighth world power, so Armageddon is upon us.

It’s about damn time. I mean they predicted it seven times in the 20^th Century, three times in my lifetime during my tenure as a Jo Ho and it didn’t happen.

The eighth time might be the charm.

Einstein’s definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, each time hoping for a different result. By that definition, because of believing the Witnesses,  I’m insane by three times.

So, I’ll be sitting here, sipping  my Crown and Seven Up or maybe some Corona, waiting for our Chinese masters to show up at my door and give me my orders. Based on past history that’s a far more likely scenario than Armageddon.

“Oh yea” says the incensed Jo Ho “Just wait!! You’ll be destroyed like all the others!!”

Been there, said that. Have a beer and chill. How do you say “Jehovah” in Chinese? You better learn.

More Bible Bullshit, March, 2011

 

John 3:16, from the King James Version of the Bible:

“For god loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life”

John 3:16, from the New World Translation of the Bible, the Jehovah’s Witness Bible:

“For God loved the world so much that he gave his only-begotten Son, in order that everyone exercising faith in him might not be destroyed but have everlasting life

We’ve all seen assholes holding up signs at ball games with “John 3:16” plastered across it. As an aside, did you ever bother to look it up? I didn’t either, but I already knew what it said. Remember I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and had the Bible jammed down my throat.

Further, we all know the story of how God sent Jesus to earth, the Jews killed him in a horrible way and God resurrected him and he is now presumable back in heaven. So today we have the Christmas and Easter holidays to commemorate this whole series of events.

Jesus was born, we have Christmas. We give gifts, sing holiday and have drunken parties, that often end in female nudity and wanton sex, all admittedly cool things. So then Jesus was killed and resurrected, we have Easter. Jesus was hung on a stake or cross, whichever you choose to believe as there is proof of neither. He died slowly, agonizingly, painfully. So we, in honor of all that celebrate all this by Easter egg hunts, giving kids Easter baskets and chocolate rabbits, but unfortunately not much female nudity and wanton sex.

But did you ever think about the way Jesus died? Now I don’t believe in the Bible and there is scant proof that Jesus ever lived, but humor me. They take this guy, and nail him through his hands and feet to  the cross/stake. Then they hoist him and the stake/cross upright, his body weight supported and resting on the wounds in his hands and feet. He lives for a few hours in agonizing pain and then, for good measure the Roman guards attending him break his legs and pierce his side with a sword.

Have you bible thumpers ever thought of it that way? Likely not. This manner of death was quit common in those days, in fact the Romans and other civilizations had many equally horrible ways to kill people. Look it up.

But the real question for Bible believers is what is the point of this whole exercise? Because “God loved the world” so by sending Jesus to earth, to die such an ignominious death, he demonstrated that love.

I’m sorry, but I don’t get it. When I was a kid, my mother showed she loved me when she gave me a cookie.  My kids and grandkids give me pictures, ties and other stuff. I like e-books, so my family gives me those as gifts to show they love me or at least because they feel some obligation to get me a gift.

If my neighbor, one day, dragged his kid over to my front lawn and yelled to me “This is for you because I love you” and shot his kid in the head, I don’t think that would please, benefit or even entertain me.

But that’s what Christians say God did. Maybe I’m missing something, but after giving this a lot of thought, I don’t get it. I would think that God had a lot of much more less gruesome ways to prove “he loved us”.  Christians believe He gave us all life itself. That’s a pretty cool thing. Killing your Son is perhaps pushing the envelope. Again, a cookie would do, but no. As in all religion and as in the Bible we are presented with things that make no sense in any context.

The Jesus/Crucifixion thing has been ingrained into us so much simply by the exposure we get from  living in a Judeo/Christian Society, most of us never stop to think of the logic involved. But again, it makes no sense.

Oh the Bible gives us some justification, “a perfect life for a perfect life”. This is what the Witnesses say at any rate. Adam, was perfect when he sinned, so a perfect man had to be sacrificed or give his life at what the witnesses call a “corresponding ransom”. Adam sinned, so we all inherited sin, Jesus died to make up for Adams screw up.

So, when does all humanity benefit from Jesus death? We all sure caught hell when Adam sinned, but guess what? You have to “believe in Jesus” to get the benefit of his death. I don’t believe in Jesus, so I don’t get invited to the “sin be gone” party. Fuck, I don’t believe in Adam, but I sure “inherited his imperfection” and am going to die/go to hell as a result of his fuck up. Somehow, this doesn’t seem fair. But hey, we’re talking religion! Nothing makes and sense or in any way can be considered fair.

So, who made that idiotic rule up? Apparently God. But the question remains, does God answer to anyone? Doesn’t he make the rules? Would anyone who believed in God have question a more humane less gruesome “method” of “saving” us?

The Bible is full of this “blood” stuff. The fucking Jews were obsessed with blood. In the Old Testament at the Jewish temple they had a twelve foot in diameter bowl full of blood. Look it up. They did a lot of wierd stuff with blood, like sprinkling it on different thinks for no apparent logical reason. Oh yea, and if your kid pissed you off you could have him stoned to death.

As for “the ranson” it’s a stupid fucking rules that in Jesus case resulted in a brutal execution of a human being for no real reason. It doesn’t make sense in any context.

In reality, I don’t believe in the Bible and don’t think any of this bullshit happened, but if so, is it too late for God to hand out cookies?

Sorry guys, I was out of the Country and went dark for a while…but I’m Back!!!

Let me get situated and I will start spewing anti- religious/Jehovah’s Witness venom shortly.

I’m catching up on comments.

I see Hillary is still a cunt. Some things never change.

Hillary Clinton

More Bible Bullshit: Super Christian Agonizes Over His Own Doubts

November 13, 1995 issue of Christianity Today, page 31, in an article about Billy Graham says:

“Questions about the authority of Scripture had been troubling the young preacher (Billy Graham) for weeks. Knowing that the matter must be settled in his mind if he ever hoped to preach with authority and power, he wrestled with his doubts until he was able to pray; ‘Oh God, I cannot prove certain things. I cannot answer some of the questions my friends are asking. Yet, here and now I am ready to accept the Bible] by faith as the Word of God.”

Mr. Graham was wrestling with fact that he couldn’t “prove certain things” and he could not “answer some of the questions” his friends were asking. And “Yet, here and now I am ready to accept the Bible by faith as the Word of God”

No facts, just faith. The lack of tangible proof obviously bothered Mr. Graham, but he choose the improvable over reason. Again, my mantra, Religion needs faith, because it has no facts.

What does this say about Billy Graham? Well, he is man of conscience and plain honesty. What other Religious leader would say that he had “Questions about the authority of Scripture” and he found these questions “troubling”? Do you see the Pope or the Ayatollah Khomeini saying such things and allowing them to be published in a magazine? Does the Pope doubt the Church? Does the Ayatollah doubt the Quran? Not in print.

As a Deist and a non believer in any Religion, I must admire Billy Braham’s candor and character.

But I find his actions puzzling, because he decided “Yet, here and now I am ready to accept the Bible by faith as the Word of God”. What specifics about the Bible caused him question the “authority of Scripture”, he does not elaborate on. What does it mean to question the “authority of Scripture”? It’ seems clear that Mr. Graham doubted the Bible as the source of information from God.

The word “authority” means “the right and power to enforce laws, exact obedience, command, determine or judge”. “The American Heritage Dictionary”. Who does Christianity maintain has the right to do all these thing? Would it not be God and more specifically the God of the Bible? If the Bible was Gods word, would not it be, to Christians, authoritative?

He is reasonable up to the point he says “Yet, here and now I am ready to accept the Bible by faith as the Word of God”. Basically, “I don’t have a single fact or reasonable thought but I’ll push aside my doubts, the things I cannot prove, the inconsistencies and go with the Faith thing”. So all these years, Mr. Graham has had doubts about some of the things he preaches.

Yogi Berra, the legendary catcher for the 1960’s New York Yankees, famous for his humorous euphemisms, once said “When you come to a fork in the road, take it”. Mr. Graham did just that. He took the “Faith” fork over the “Road to Reason”.

This is why Religion exists and exerts such great powers over people. They choose the unreasonable over the factual, the provable over the improvable.

Like I said, you have to admire Mr. Graham for allowing his inner thoughts to be published in a Christian magazine. It’s important to mention also that there has been little, if any scandal or controversy concerning Bill Graham, save for the tireless theological screeching of his Religious detractors. To be fair, Mr. Graham has does his share of screeching back, but he seems sincere.

But my point here is not entirely about Billy Graham. It is about people unreasonably believing in something they can’t prove. He admits it, but his “faith” took over, he brushed aside reason and he “believed”.

Wow! The question is, do you do that? I ask because I did the same thing. In the face of irrefutable facts, that I lived and observed, I brushed them aside and continued on as a faithful Christian, a card carrying Jehovah’s Witness. But equally interesting was that I had the same wrestling as Mr. Graham and came to an entirely different conclusion. I concluded the Bible was not the authority and the Witnesses and all other Religions were false.

Interesting, I recently had a conversation with a Witness who was having doubts about the Witnesses. Now, as a background, I am disfellowshipped or excommunicated, and the Witnesses consider me an “apostate” or someone who once agreed with them and now does not. In fact I openly and vocally disagree.

This individual and I were exchanging emails. This person said:

“I am a Jehovah’s Witness and up until 4 or 5 months ago when I started doing in depth research about my religion, I was totally oblivious to half the things people said about us.”

“I can tell you from experience that most Jehovah’s Witnesses have very little knowledge of the history of our religion, except for the very “small” bits and pieces we receive from our literature.”

“It took me years to overcome my fear of so-called “apostate” literature but once I did what I found was that the stuff I read was NOT apostate at all, but was really a compilation of old articles and books.”

“I have been very SHOCKED at some of the things I have read that we used to believe and teach as the “truth”.

“I can say this—the organization is right about one thing—If you read “outside” information your faith WILL indeed be weakened, not because it is false information, but because it is real and you can read it right from the books they published and see how VERY hard it is to believe that this organization has ever had God’s backing.”

As with Billy Graham and myself, this person is having trouble reconciling what they believe, or are taught to believe with provable facts. In the case of Jehovah’s Witnesses, they have “flip-flopped” on numerous issues. What they presented as the “truth” in the past, in many cases is opposite or different to what they present as the “truth” today. The insidious thing is they attempt to hide this from the membership, often editing out embarrassing things out of later additions of their publications. When they’re caught, they twist the mistake into an example of virtue.

“Look how we admit when we’re wrong! We must be right!”

To reiterate, I am not bashing just Jehovah’s Witnesses, it’s just been my lifes experinece.  I’m lying. I despise Jehovah’s Witnesses.

The example of Billy Graham here just reinforces the poin that people will follow a certain Religion or belief, even though they know it has flaws and contradictions, because of faith. How can you have faith in something you know is flawed?

Faith, like a snowball rolling down a hill, gains momentum and grows, as time progresses. You whole life gradually comes under the influence of your faith, your family, friends, business relationships. In Billy Graham’s case, imagine the life changes he would have to make if he had simply said, “I cannot preach what I can’t prove”. First, he would have lost his livelihood. He’s done pretty good and made a lot of money. You can bend your conscience around a lot of ideas if the right amount of money is involved.

Second, his family and circle of friends all were involved in his faith. No doubt, he had professed it to many people and preached to many audiences. Now, he would have to recant.

These and other thoughts no doubt weighed heavily on his mind. They did on mine. My family doesn’t speak to me, parents, sibling and their kids. I literally had hundreds, if not a thousand friends and acquaintances that now shun me. If they see me in public, they act as if I don’t exist.

I am considered an “apostate” or in the definition of Jehovah’s Witnesses, one who once agreed with them and now doesn’t. I am, in Witness eyes, the vilest of the vile. I have to laugh as I am probably the most harmless guy you’ll ever meet. I’m 58, a professional, I am a real estate investor and a business consultant. I have grandchildren, all of whom I have little contact with, because of the Witnesses.

But to the Witnesses, I am as close to the Devil Himself as you can get.

But, I knew the drill. It was a choice between what I knew was true and what I knew was bullshit. In my case, unlike Billy Graham, I couldn’t reconcile the contradictions in the Watchtower Society’s literature. I took the “Road to Reason” fork. It took me years to get up the courage, but finally, I have an inner peace. Hypocrisy is hard work and I was a hypocrite for years.

All Religion is a stain on the human experience. By presenting improvable ideas and demanding our complete submission and faith, it diminishes us as human beings. We must be in “lock step” with the self appointed authority figure and not argue or disagree, less the powers that be deem us unfit to associate with and then of course the loving God they worship will then kill and/or punish us in a most violent and horrible way.

In the meantime, I’m on the Road to Reason, in my yellow Corvette at peace with the world. How about you?

Bible Bullshit: Debunking “Scientific Proof” that the Bible was Inspired by God

Jehovah’s Witnesses and other Bible advocates are constantly referring to the “Scientific Proof” that the Bible was inspired by God. They refer to allegedly “scientific” facts that they maintain ancient man could not possibly have known, as “proof” that God inspired the Bible.

For example look at Isaiah 40:22:“There is One who is dwelling above the circle of the earth, the dwellers in which are as grasshoppers, the One who is stretching out the heavens just as a fine gauze, who spreads them out like a tent in which to dwell.”

The implication is that the Bible says the world was round at a time when it was not possible for man to know this.  The only conclusion they draw is that God had to have told them. The Witnesses elaborate, from the Watchtower 7/15/05, page 5:

“Another reason why you can put your trust in the Bible is that when it comes to scientific matters, what this ancient book states is accurate. For example, at a time when most people believed that the earth was flat, the Bible spoke of “the circle [or, sphere] of the earth.” (Isaiah 40:22)  

They literally insert the word “sphere” where it does not occur. Also, note that they say when “most people” thought the earth was flat, indicating that some civilizations did not think the world was flat.

Interestingly, Isaiah 22:18 says the following:“Without fail he will wrap you up tightly, like a ball for a wide land. There you will die, and there the chariots of your glory will be the dishonor of the house of your master. ¹⁹ And I will push you away from your position; and from your official standing one will tear you down.”

So there is a word for “circle” and a word for “sphere” or “ball.

Further, The Institute for Biblical and Scientific Studies has this to say on their website;

http://www.bibleandscience.com/bible/books/genesis/genesis1_circleearth.htm:

“The phrase of Isaiah 40:22, “the circle of the earth” is very controversial. There are five main views of this phrase. The first interpretation says that the word “circle” means “sphere” indicating that the earth is a sphere. This view seems most unlikely since we have all ready seen that the Hebrew word gh means “circle,” and it seems very remote that it means “sphere” because of the context, and there is a better Hebrew word for “sphere,” rwd. In Isaiah 22:18 the word rwdis translated “ball.” If the LXX translators understood gh as “sphere,” they would have used the Greek word sfairoeides. Plugging the meaning of “sphere” into every passage that gh occurs will result in awkward interpretations.”

So with a word for “circle” and a word for “sphere” or “ball”, and Isaiah 40:22 using the word “circle” to describe the earth, it is at the very least a distortion of the facts to suggest that the Bible is true because it says the world is “spherical”. It actually says the earth is, in effect, shaped like a dinner plate or a Frisbee.

It is also recognized that historians generally credit the Greeks with being the first to suggest a spherical earth. In the sixth century B.C., Pythagoras suggested a spherical earth and Eratosthenes of Alexandria (circa 276 to 194 or 192 B.C.) calculated the circumference of the earth “within 50 miles of the present estimate.” [Encyclopedia Britannica]

There are several obvious conclusions that can be drawn from this information. First, it is simply unlikely that God would describe the earth as a circle or a disk when the Hebrews had a word for sphere or ball.Also, if the Hebrews had figured out that the earth was round, even spherical, so what? Wouldn’t it be possible for some real smart Jew to come to that conclusion? The Greeks also figured it out and without “God’s” help. As mentioned, Eratosthenes of Alexandria even calculated the circumference of the earth “within 50 miles of the present estimate.” [Encyclopedia Britannica].

But even more ridicules are the Bible supporters contention that if God was looking at the earth, it would look like a circle.  In fact the Jehovah’s Witness publication “Insight on the Scriptures” in Volume 1, page 668 says: “From the viewpoint of Jehovah, the earth’s face, or the surface of the waters, would, of course, have a circular form, just as the edge of the moon presents a circular appearance to us.”

Is God a complete idiot? The Earth is a sphere. A basketball looks like a circle from a distance. God surely knows that. The Greeks figured it out and there is no indication that the Hebrews hadn’t either. But Bible advocates insist that because God said that the Earth was a “circle” it proves the Bible scientifically accurate, as it states a scientific fact that the ancient Hebrews could not know, so it had to be God that told them.

The Witnesses continue this hopeless line of idiocy with this from the Watchtower of 6/15/93, pg 4:“Unlike myths of ancient peoples, the Bible does not contain the mistaken view that the earth is flat. Instead, it states the scientific truth that the earth is a circular object resting on nothing.”

Not all ancient peoples thought the earth was flat. We know the ancient Greeks didn’t. The improvable supposition that the Bible quotes predate the Greeks conclusion is moot. The point is ancient civilizations, other than the Jews, and before modern science had pictures from space, knew the earth was spherical and God didn’t tell them, unless the Bible leaves out the part where God told Pythagoras and Eratosthenes.  

They figured it out from observation.It‘s interesting how Eratosthenes discerned the earth was spherical.

From the Encyclopedia Britannica:“At Syene (now Aswan), some 800 km (500 miles) southeast of Alexandria in Egypt, the Sun’s rays fall vertically at noon at the summer solstice. Eratosthenes noted that at Alexandria, at the same date and time, sunlight fell at an angle of about 7° from the vertical. He correctly assumed the Sun’s distance to be very great; its rays therefore are practically parallel when they reach the Earth. Given estimates of the distance between the two cities, he was able to calculate the circumference of the Earth. The exact length of the units (stadia) he used is doubtful, and the accuracy of his result is therefore uncertain; it may have varied by 0.5 to 17 percent from the value accepted by modern astronomers. He also measured the degree of obliquity of the ecliptic (in effect, the tilt of the Earth’s axis) with great accuracy and compiled a star catalog. His mathematical work is known principally from the writings of Pappus of Alexandria. “

So IF the Bibles said the Earth was spherical (it doesn’t) so what? Eratosthenes figured it out through observation. So the Witnesses contention that “Only God, the Creator, could have provided this detail ” (Watchtower 4/15/94, pg 5) is patently false.

Let me pause here and reiterate that this blog is not a diatribe against Jehovah’s Witnesses. The Witnesses have been my experience, so I refer to their literature most often. Virtually every other Christian religion takes the same position. They are not alone in their idiocy.

The Bible makes other assertions about the earth that are contradictory. For example, in Job 26:7 it says: “God is stretching out the north over the empty place‚ hanging the earth upon nothing.” That’s scientifically accurate.

However it also says the earth has a foundation:Isaiah 48:13:

“Moreover, my own hand laid the foundation of the earth, and my own right hand extended out the heavens. I am calling to them, that they may keep standing together.” NWT

“Yea, my hand hath laid the foundation of the earth, and my right hand hath spread out the heavens: when I call unto them, they stand up together. ASV

Isaiah 51:13: “And that you should forget Jehovah your Maker, the One stretching out the heavens and laying the foundation of the earth, so that you were in dread constantly the whole day long on account of the rage of the one hemming [you] in, as though he was all set to bring [you] to ruin? And where is the rage of the one hemming [you] in? NWT

“and hast forgotten Jehovah thy Maker, that stretched forth the heavens, and laid the foundations of the earth; and fearest continually all the day because of the fury of the oppressor, when he maketh ready to destroy? and where is the fury of the oppressor?” ASV

Many ancient civilizations believed the earth rested on an Elephants back, on Atlas’s shoulders or other such myths. The Bible says the Earth hangs on nothing but then it has a “foundation”, implying it rests on something.

The Bible also mentions  “the extremity of the earth” (Ps 46:9), “the ends of the earth” (Ps 22:27), “the four extremities of the earth” (Isa 11:12), “the four corners of the earth,” and “the four winds of the earth” (Re 7:1). Of course, to Bible advocates these quotes are not to be taken “literally”, as they are “symbolic”. It’s amazing that it’s “literal” when it supports you view and “symbolic” when it doesn’t.The Bible, in fact describes the earth in several different, unscientific and contradictory ways.

In summary, the fact that the earth was spherical was no big secret to the ancient Greeks, without the aid of pictures from space, so why should it be beyond belief that the Hebrews could have figured it out. The only problem is, the writings in the Old Testament, including one in Job refer to the earth as “Frisbee” shaped, not spherical.  Bible thumpers, Jehovah’s Witnesses in particular, unapologetically distort the facts in an attempt to prove their point.

There is no definitive proof that the Bible was inspired by God or  that Jesus was a historical figure. Christianity is based on things that its adherents could not possibly know or prove. 

Jehovah’s Witnesses continue to edit “The Truth”

Jehovah’s Witnesses continue to shift their theology and to edit past publications to cover up inconsistencies and predictions that fail to come true. 

 I have an original bound volume for the year 1989, which has in it the Watchtower from Jan 1, 1989, as well as an original single copy of this same magazine. For those Non Witnesses, The Watchtower has been published twice a month for over a century, on the 1^st and 15^th . At the end of each year the Watchtower Society will publish a volume with all 24 Watchtower issues in it, for that year.  It’s called a bound volume. 

 On page 12, par 8 of the Jan 1, 1989 Watchtower, my bound volume and the individual copy of the Watchtower I have, says in the last sentence of that paragraph, “He was also laying a foundation for a work that would be completed in our 20th Century” In the 2005 and 2006 CD, the same sentence says “He was also laying a foundation for a work that would be completed in our day.”All of the later 1989 bound volumes also say “completed in our day.”  The issue here is two fold. First, the Watchtower said that this “work” would be completed in our 20th Century. Read the context below and you’ll see that “the work” referred to is “the Christian missionary activity”. The Witnesses contend was started by the apostle Paul and revived by Charles Russell, founder of Jehovah’s Witnesses. As you can see, this work did not stop in the 20^th century as stated in the Watchtower. At this writing, in 2008 the Witnesses continue this work. The second issue is that The Watchtower Society edited this comment from the original “work that would be completed in our 20th Century” to “work that would be completed in our day”  once it became clear that their original claim was bullshit.

 

 

Below I have inserted a photocopy of the original Watchtower from 1/1/89 and outlined the statement in question in par 8. The Witnesses made what was a completely false statement, in fact a false prediction and when they realized it, they edited it out in future issues and reference material. Everything they print is suspect, as it is subject to change or omission.

Millions of Witnesses remain blithely in lock step with an organization that when it tells them to jump, they say how high.

 

Ironically, Jehovah’s Witnesses refer to their religion as “The Truth”. So , I guess “Truth” is edited or altered at the whim of the Society and it still remains the truth.

 

If God was indeed leading them, as they claim, wouldn’t it be reasonable to conclude that there would be nothing that would need editing? 

 

Religious Bullshit: The Unreasonableness of Religious Faith

“Faith is the assured expectation of things hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities though not beheld.” Hebrews 11:1, the New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures

“Now faith is assurance of things hoped for, a conviction of things not seen” Hebrews 11:1, The American Standard Version of the Holy Bible.

This is the Christian definition of faith. Note that both of these Bible’s use the phrases “Hoped for” and an expectation, “evident reality” or conviction of things not seen. So, faith is “hoping for” something or being “convinced of” something as being real, even though you’ve not seen it.

What then is Christian or any religious faith for that matter, based on? Things no one has seen, but “hopes” to see based on “assured expectation” or “assurance”. Assurance from what? Assurance from who? Christians say assurance from God, through Jesus, as God wrote down in the Bible. Not withstanding the fact that there is no proof that God wrote the Bible, that God even exists or that Jesus was a real person.  

It’s like chasing your tail. Keep repeating “God wrote the Bible, and it says we should have faith in God”. Like a child’s electric train, it goes around and around, with no end and ultimately gets to no real conclusion. There is no whistle stop at “facts” or “reason”.

Religion relies entirely on faith. Why? Because it has no facts. You have to pretend to know things that you do not and cannot possibly know.

I opened with a quote from the Bible regarding faith. It was taken from Hebrews 11:1. This quotation talks about the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction in things not seen. The 11th Chap of Hebrews does not end there. It continues and perhaps missed by the casual reader, it reveals a flaw in this philosophy:

4 By faith Abel offered God a sacrifice of greater worth than Cain, through which [faith] he had witness borne to him that he was righteous, God bearing witness respecting his gifts; and through it he, although he died, yet speaks.
5 By faith Enoch was transferred so as not to see death, and he was nowhere to be found because God had transferred him; for before his transference he had the witness that he had pleased God well. 6 Moreover, without faith it is impossible to please [him] well, for he that approaches God must believe that he is and that he becomes the rewarder of those earnestly seeking him.
7 By faith Noah, after being given divine warning of things not yet beheld, showed godly fear and constructed an ark for the saving of his household; and through this [faith] he condemned the world, and he became an heir of the righteousness that is according to faith.
8 By faith Abraham, when he was called, obeyed in going out into a place he was destined to receive as an inheritance; and he went out, although not knowing where he was going. 9 By faith he resided as an alien in the land of the promise as in a foreign land, and dwelt in tents with Isaac and Jacob, the heirs with him of the very same promise. 10 For he was awaiting the city having real foundations, the builder and maker of which [city] is God.

11 By faith also Sarah herself received power to conceive seed, even when she was past the age limit, since she esteemed him faithful who had promised. 12 Hence also from one [man] and him as good as dead, there were born [children] just as the stars of heaven for multitude and as the sands that are by the seaside, innumerable.
So Hebrew 11:1 says that faith is assurance of things hoped for, a conviction of things not seen and than it goes on to mention examples of faith, Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham and his wife Sarah.

The interesting thing here is that all these characters mentioned, according to the Bible, had on numerous occasions each witnessed supernatural events that certainly would convince me and I’m sure most people that there indeed was a God and if he said so, the Bible was his written word. The Bible speaks of all of these individuals as having direct communication with God, receiving instructions from God and/or witnessing events that were caused by God himself. They didn’t have the kind of faith in God’s existence that was mentioned in vs. 1, because they actually spoke to him. If God spoke to me, I believe I’d be convinced. Their faith was based on facts and first hand personal experience.

God appeared to Noah, in Gen chapter 6:13 -22 and told him to build the ark, take animals two by two etc. So God, no doubt in an awe inspiring and obvious supernatural manner, appeared to Noah and Noah, evidently not being an idiot and convinced of God’s obvious existence because he SAW and SPOKE to him, did what God asked. Maybe he did have faith. But he also had FACTS. He spoke to God, as did the others mentioned in Hebrews. The existence of God was not a question.

Noah and the others mentioned did not have the faith decribed in Hebrews 11:1. They had facts on which to base their faith.

But we, thousands of years later, all we have is “Now faith is assurance of things hoped for, a conviction of things not seen”. We’re supposed to read about what they did and somehow we have to develop faith. No talking to God, no awe inspiring events, no messages from God via Angels. Just an ancient improvable book filled with fantastic, cryptic stories that are completely improvable.

Where does it say you are to have faith in the Bible? In the Bible. Where else? No where, save for Religious literature based on the Bible. Has God made any appearances lately? Haven’t seen him. If God or an Angel appeared to virtually anyone, I’m sure that would get their attention and if he said “Read the Bible. It’s my Word”, I would be the first one to the book store. Why? Because now I have a fact. I could confidently say “I saw God and it was awe some!!”

Most of us are still looking.

More Proof the Bible is Bull Shit.

Jehovah’s Witness and Bible thumpers like to continually harp on the scientific accuracy of the Bible as proof it was written by God. In an earlier post, I debunked the notion that the bible said the Earth was round before science proved it and when most people though it was flat, a little biblical factoid the Witnesses like to crow about. 

Recently I was on a JW Q&A, where as per usual, I stir shit up. It’s a gift. I asked if Jesus was wrong when he said in Mark 4:31: 

“Like a mustard grain, which at the time it was sown in the ground was the tiniest of all the seeds that are on the earth” New World Translation.

The American Standard Version says: “It is like a grain of mustard seed, which, when it is sown upon the earth, though it be less than all the seeds that are upon the earth,” 

The New English Bible says “It is like a mustard seed that when sown in the ground, even though it is the smallest of all the seeds in the ground”

The King James Version says: “is less than all the seeds that be in the earth”.

The New Jerusalem Bible says “It is like a mustard seed which, at the time of its sowing, is the smallest of all the seeds on earth.

“The Catholic Douay Version says: ” It is as a grain of mustard seed: which when it is sown in the earth, is less than all the seeds that are in the earth:”

Jesus was apparently using the illustration that good things can come from a very small beginning, or something like that. His point is irrelevant. The real point is the glaring scientific inaccuracy of his statement. In fact the mustard seed in not the tiniest, smallest or “less” than all the seeds “in the earth”, “on earth” or “upon the earth”. Since they are some of the loudest Bible pounders, I’ll let the Jehovah’s Witnesses elaborate.“So Jesus was not “teaching a lesson in botany.”  Well, In Isaiah, Chap 20 where the Witnesses point to God looking at the “circle” of the earth as proof the bible is scientifically accurate, is God there giving an Astronomy lesson? I’ve already debunked that piece of disinformation, but they jump on it as proof of the Bible’s authorship.

From the Watchtower of 5/15/92, page 5:

Botany: Some wrongly conclude that the Bible is inaccurate because Jesus Christ spoke of “a mustard grain” as “the tiniest of all the seeds.” (Mark 4:30-32) Likely, Jesus meant the seed of the black mustard plant (Brassica nigra or Sinapis nigra), which is only about 0.039 to 0.063 inch [1 to 1.6 mm] in diameter. Though there are smaller seeds, such as fine-as-powder seeds of the orchid,  Jesus was not talking to people who grew orchids. Those Galilean Jews knew that of the various types of seeds sown by local farmers, the mustard seed was the tiniest. Jesus was talking about the Kingdom, not teaching a lesson in botany.

Is the fact the that he was “not teaching a lesson in botany” give him license to state a provable unscientific fact? What would be the point? Jesus was wrong. The mustard seed is not the smallest seed in creation. The seed of the orchid is. But God and/or God’s son, (choose your own theology) didn’t know this fact or chose to state a scientific inaccuracy. He could have said the mustard sees is “one of the smallest”, is “among” the smallest or that it simply “is very small”. His audience would have gotten the sense of his illustration. It was not important for him to say “It is like a mustard seed which, at the time of its sowing, is the smallest of all the seeds on earth.” The fact that it was very small and recognized for being so by his audience would have been sufficient for him to make his point. He didn’t say that. He said the smallest seed in creation. Science proves otherwise.

Jesus was wrong.The brain dead, delusional religious morons on the Q&A responded as expected. In order to believe in and have faith in things you cannot see, you have to suspend your ability to think critically, analytically and logically. No where was this more apparent than in the responses to my post.“You’re nit picking!!” they cried, accusatorily wagging the cyber finger of divine justice in my face. Hey, I didn’t say Jesus was God/God’s son and thus perfect and all knowing, they did. I don’t believe the Bible is God’s word or that Jesus ever lived. But, if he is wrong, just once he is not, by definition perfect. He was wrong. Don’t kill the messenger. Explain the verse, answer the question.

 “It’s not important. It’s the message”. Bullshit, it is important, it’s very important. If the opposite was true, you can bet your ass the JW’s and every other delusional Bible thumper would be screeching about how the Bible was so scientifically accurate. “How could Jesus know that the, mustard seed was the smallest in the whole earth unless he had that divine knowledge? See, the Bible is from God!!!”

Do you want to talk about nit picking? Get in on the argument about John 1:1. They will argue endlessly over the notion that Jesus was “a” god, or Jesus was “the” God. The nit picking charge, is itself not relevant, as most Bible controversies are, by definition, nit picking. Brilliant men, spend there lives pouring over ancient manuscripts to answer such “nit picky” questions.

“Oh, but you have to take his comment about the mustard seed in context. His audience knew it to be the smallest seed, so it made sense to them”

Well, who is Jesus’ audience? Do Jehovah’s Witnesses and other modern day Christians think of themselves as Jesus audience? Does Jesus talk to you through the pages of the Bible? Was Jesus not capable of thinking ahead and realizing that a future audience, with accurate botanical knowledge may know that indeed the mustard seed is not the smallest seed “in the world”?

Would it not, then in the much broader context, have made sense for the all knowing Jesus to say “one of the smallest seeds in the WHOLE earth? Or, is the Bible, not from God, written by men, who at that time thought the mustard seed indeed was the smallest seed in the whole earth?

If you’re a Christian, you better be able to reconcile in your own mind that Jesus made a provable scientific error here and therefore is not perfect. If you choose to ignore the obvious, than you have surrendered all you critical, logical and analytical thinking skills, to what ever authority figure you’ve attached yourself to. How many Christians who read this will actually think about it, research it and give it an honest appraisal. Few, if any.

Most Christians will dismiss me as a ranting, demon possessed hater of God, whose primary purpose in life is to rob them of their precious relationship with the Almighty, to screw up their chances of salvation.  Well, you can rest easy about me. I don’t give a flying fuck what you believe or weather you live or die. In other words, I care as much about you as you do about me.  

The real funny thing is that all you hopelessly delusional competing groups of “Christians” think every  other group is trying to do what you accuse me of, rob you of your salvation, block your entrance to heaven, turn you against Jesus/God.

And you’re right!  To, Jehovah’s Witnesses, if you ain’t one of them, God is going to kill you. The Baptists think all the Witnesses are going to hell. The Catholics, as enunciated by Pope Benedict think all none Catholic Churches are counterfeit. You all think your right and God is going to punish everyone else.

 This is a fine kettle of fish, as my old grandma would say.

Hoards of delusional, or worse self delusional assholes, frantically running in circles, trying to please their version of God as given the them by their Authority Figure. Who claims exclusive communication with the Almighty, who incidentally probably failed botany class.

In my fantasy, I picture myself sitting on the periphery of your circle in a beach chair drinking a Corona, watching you all frantically chase after salvation, Occasionally I will put out my foot and trip one of you with a post like the above. It’s just fun to watch you flail and fall face down into the sand.

Religion is such bull shit. I mean , com’on!!!    

A Big Baptist Brawl in Florida!!!

This is some funny shit!!

TURMOIL AT FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH OF OCALA (Florida)

Associate Pastors Fired

The six assistants had criticized the substance and style of Pastor Mark Cummins’ leadership

“The entrance to First Baptist Church of Ocala is lit by a ray of sunshine on Monday. The sunny day stood in dark contrast to the clouds of uncertainty that hung over the church after a tumultous Sunday service that left its congregation divided.”

By Bill Thompson
Staff writer

Published: Tuesday, November 11, 2008 at 6:30 a.m.
Last Modified: Tuesday, November 11, 2008 at 5:51 a.m.

“OCALA – One year ago this month, Dr. Mark Cummins arrived in Ocala as the new pastor at one of the community’s largest churches.”

“Setting up shop at the First Baptist Church of Ocala after relocating from South Florida, Cummins took to his new role as spiritual and administrative head of his flock with the intensity, discipline and can-do attitude of a former U.S. Marine, which he was some 20 years ago.”

You can read the whole article here:

http://www.ocala.com/article/20081111/NEWS/811111000/1402/NEWS?Title=Associate_pastors_fired

More stuff from the article:

“But some top lieutenants at the church have taken exception not only to Cummins’ leadership style, which one church member likened to a dictatorship at one of Ocala’s most prominent Protestant houses of worship, but to the substance as well.”

“A brewing behind-the-scenes controversy at First Baptist quickly came to a public boil on Sunday, spilling over into the pews and, according to several church members, leaving its large congregation divided over their pastor and anxious about the church’s future – even though many of the rank and file remain in the dark about how it all came to be.”

                  _____________________________

The root of the problem is that the membership does not know why the six associate pastors were fired. Some of these guys had been with the Church for many years. It seems that the six Associate Pastors didn’t like Cummins and subsequently wanted him gone, but he turned the tables on them and they got gone instead, to the dismay of many church members.

Subsequently, the Sunday morning worship service turned ugly and unruly, with shouts of “We want the truth” and “speak truth”. It was reported that many members surged in protest toward the stage, and there were unconfirmed reports of parishioners shouting “Cut his balls off”. 

It reminds me of the frequent brawls the Apostles had in the Bible over who would sit next to Jesus, who was Jesus “pet”, whose turn it was to have his feet washed by Jesus, important stuff like that.

I’m sure you remember, from the Gospel accounts that usually, after several rounds of sacramental wine, the brawl would start with someone randomly throwing a sandal at the guys who got to sit next to Jesus and before you knew it, it was a free for all. Usually, Judas, being the runt of the litter would end up in a headlock or someone would yell “pig pile”, and they all would pile on him. I think that was a factor in his ratting them out to the Po Po.

There was a theory that they would frequently give Judas wedgies. Bible scholars have since debunked that theory, proving that they actually didn’t wear underwear, making the mental vision of 12 brawling guys, wearing only tunics, just that much more disturbing.

There are no reports of sandal throwing or wedgies at Sundays brawl, though Bible scholars are still is disagreement over weather Southern Baptists wear underwear. There is a report that a choir member in the top row got a woman’s size seven black pump to the head, causing her to fall forward, sending choir members sprawling, like so many dominos.

There is also an unconfirmed report of someone getting on the stage and grabbing a guy by the organ. There were also rumors of a member getting beaned by a can of snuff and several “Bible and Hymnal” related injuries.

“It was a mess!” one parishioner is quoted as saying “Some crazy bitch hit me in the balls with her purse”

Pastor Cummins, being a retired Marine, is reportedly considering putting sharpshooters in the balcony, installing metal detectors and confiscating everyone’s shoes, Bibles, flammable liquids, small arms and anything that can be thrown,  at each service. Maybe the membership will think twice before messing with an ex-Marine.

One parishoner was over heard saying:”Now, you can’t even bring your six shooter to Church! Wecome to Obama’s America”

What the end result of all this will be is anyone’s guess. This same church split many years ago after their church burned down, with some wanting to rebuild on the same land and other wanting to build a new church in a different spot. I understand that the new church was built on the new land, but not before a series of similar brawls, drive by shootings and sandal attacks in the Mall.

It’s always fun to watch hypocrites act like real people. Christians are no different from anyone else, when they don’t get their way. What a great example of Christianity in action for anyone who may be contemplating joining the church or becoming a Baptist.

Although, there is another angle to this. If anyone at First Baptist has any marketing savvy, they will see an opportunity here. If you add an open bar, you could have Saturday night fight services! Hey, that would get me to church. I would think membership would soar.

“You mean you can fight and drink beer? Cool!!”

Besides, I’d love to give a Baptist one of my size 11’s upside the head.

 

It’s “Slam the Baptists Week” here at ISNRBLOG

More Baptist Bullshit.

This was from an earlier post, but in light of the recent brawl at the First Baptist Church in Ocala, Florida it seems fitting:

On August 14, 2007 the “Americans United for Separation of Church and State” stated that the IRS Should Investigate Partisan Political Activity of a Southern Baptist Church in California.They allege that the Pastor of the First Southern Baptist Church of Buena Park, Calif., may have violated federal tax law barring electioneering by non-profit groups.

In a complaint to the IRS, Americans United’s (Rev. Barry W.) Lynn said Dr. Wiley S. Drake, pastor of the First Southern Baptist Church of Buena Park, issued a press release Aug. 11 endorsing Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee. Apparently Mr. Drake used Church resources to endorse GOP hopeful Huckabee as God’s Candidate in Violation of Federal Tax Law, says the Church-State Watchdog Group. Drake’s press release was issued on church letterhead. He also endorsed Huckabee on a church-affiliated radio show and featured a Huckabee campaign official.Americans United’s Lynn says the church’s intervention in partisan politics merits an IRS investigation.

How did the very Christian, Pious and “holier than thou” Dr. Wiley react? According to Yahoo News, Wed Aug 15, 3:17 PM ET this is what happened. “Instead of responding to Americans United’s concern of illegal activity, Drake issued yesterday afternoon a plea to his supporters to join in “imprecatory prayers” (curses) every morning for Americans United and its staff. ”The Rev. Barry W. Lynn, Americans United executive director, said it is telling that Drake declined to respond to his group’s charges of tax law violations.

“Instead of addressing our concerns of illegally melding religion and partisan politics, Dr. Drake has launched an outlandish attack on us,” said Lynn. “Calling for curses on us might distract Drake’s supporters, but it won’t help him with the IRS. I trust the tax agents will investigate Drake’s use of church resources to endorse a candidate for public office.“

Drake’s attack included some florid rhetoric.”In light of the recent attack from the ememies (sic) of God I ask the children of God to go into action with Imprecatory Prayer,” Drake said, in an Aug. 14 press statement issued from the First Southern Baptist Church of Buena Park. “Especially against Americans United for Seperation (sic) of Church and State.”“The righteous have dominion,” Drake said, “but only through imprecatory prayer against the ungodly.”

Drake singled out two Americans United staff members whose names appeared as contacts on the press release. The pastor’s missive said the imprecatory prayers should “specifically target” AU Communications Director Joe Conn or Communications Associate Jeremy Leaming.In a message left in Lynn’s voicemail, Drake said he had been urging his supporters to take similar action against Lynn for many years.

In a section of his press release called “How to Pray,” Drake includes a long list of biblical citations that call on God to smite enemies. For example, the alleged enemies of God “shall be judged,” “condemned,” and “his days be few…” Additionally, supporters should pray that the enemy’s “children be fatherless, and his wife a widow,” and “his children be continually vagabonds, and beg; let them seek bread also out of their desolate places.“Let there be none to extend mercy unto him,” Drake quoted, “Neither let there be any to favour his fatherless children.”

Drake is here basically calling for his supporters to pray for the death of certain members of the AU. In addition, Drake says his “supporters should pray that the enemy’s “children be fatherless, and his wife a widow,” and “his children be continually vagabonds, and beg; let them seek bread also out of their desolate places.”

Whatever happened to dialog? No need for any. Drake is right, He’s on God’s side and if you disagree with him, God will kill you. He is just one step away from the Inquisition. All he needs is Governments Support. Ask yourself, if he had the authority would he kill or preside over the killing of these members of the AU? Can you see him smugly and piously condemning the “ungodly” and having them drawn and quartered or burned alive?

The point is the spirit of the inquisition still lives in the heart of Organized Religion. Save for the power and blessing of government, Drake would have people killed for opposing him. This is the “tyranny that Christianity imposes” of which Thomas Jefferson spoke about. It’s not dead or gone, by any means. It still lurks in Organized Religion, waiting and hoping for its chance to kill you if you don’t believe their way and force you to live as they dictate.

What of his followers? How many of them are praying for the death of these individuals? “Hey. Our Leader, Drake said we should do it and even gave us examples of prayers so, it must be right.”

What happens when none of these people die and the IRS investigates the Church anyway? Drake said all this in August of 2007 and as of this writing, January, 2008, (now November, 2008) none of the “cursed” people have died. I seriously doubt that anyone will actually die, but perhaps Drake himself really believes God is going to kill these people, just because they disagree with him. But the real question is, are Drake’s followers actually giving this situation any serious thought?

I would be. In fact most rational people would. About now, I would be leaving that Church, as fast as my feet would carry me. Don’t think this is the only Pastor, Minister or Religious “Authority Figure” that says these kinds of things. This is just one of the more blatant and out in the open incidents.Religion will impose it’s will in the form of tyranny to the extent that the Government lets it. It obviously has the will and it’s constantly seeking the means. It’s when it forms powerful PACs, gets your tax money while remaining tax exempt and seeks legislation based on the Bible that it is insidious and wrong.

This church is Southern Baptist Church and part of the Southern Baptist Convention and a friend of mine emailed them asking them if they supported Drakes position.John Revell, Editor of SBC LIFE answered the issue and deftly side stepped it by not answering the question He said, in part “Actually, the SBC only takes such official positions at its annual meetings in June. Rev. Drake’s comments on “imprecatory prayers” were made since the last meetings. However, the Southern Baptist Convention has absolutely no authority whatsoever over pastors or churches.”

To which I say, bullshit! The SBC’s sidestepping of the issue is a cope out. Drake is one of Thiers and he is way out of line. The SBC could simply say that what he says the Central Organization does not believe in or support. But the SBC doesn’t say that because I think they really don’t disagree and in fact most of Southern Baptist membership has no problem with the killing of the abortion doctor or Drakes “imprecatory prayers”.  

Where is the outcry from those self righteous Baptists? Their silence is deafening.Personally, I think abortion is wrong and murder, but from a scientific standpoint. It’s ludicrous to argue that a fetus, in any stage is not a human being. The murder of an abortion doctor is also wrong and the Southern Baptist Convention, by not taking a stand betrays its complicity with murder and Drakes psychotic screeches for God to kill someone that dares to disagree with him or points out where he is violating the law.The timing excuse is simply lame. I bet they’d scream their lungs out if a Church made a gay person pastor or if a Southern Baptist Church came out in favor of abortion, no matter what time of year it was.

Hypocrisy abounds in all Religion, the Southern Baptists included

First Baptist Church, Ocala, Florida: “Are you ready to RRuummmbbbllee???

Hold the phone, the suspension is building. The mood is tense, every one is on edge asking the same question:

 

“Will there be another brawl at First Baptist, tomorrow?”

 

Buy your tickets now, they’re going fast! I understand they may have it on “Pay per View”.

 

The Vegas odds makers are two to one for former Jarhead, and thus far the victor, Pastor “fire them if they disagree!” Mark Cummins.  The opponents, the six fired Assistant Pastors, have dubbed themselves “The Dirty Half Dozen. It’s rumored that they have a sure fire strategy to defeat Cummins, involving a full frontal assault, up the middle with folding chairs, water balloons and rotten fruit. If you are in the front pews, just wear your rain gear.

 

No one two give up easily, reports say that the embattled Cummins has put tank traps in the parking lot and a mine field in front of the pulpit.

 

Katy bar the door, the fur was flying in the press this week. Seems Mr. Cummins has had a similar effect at every church he goes to, depending on who you believe. You either love him or you hate him, no middle ground.

 

He is described as “manipulative, dishonest and untrustworthy” while at the same time some call him “a man of great integrity and character”. Baptists, Christians disagreeing!! Shocking!!”

 

Who cares about all that bullshit. The point is, the guy seems to increase membership everywhere he goes, which increases revenues. He’s good for the bottom line, which is, of course…the bottom line. You can bet the Church will be busting at the seams this Sunday. Members will show up who only go on to church on Christmas and Easter, you know the type. They wear the biggest crosses and say “praise Jesus” even when you step on there foot. Even they wouldn’t miss this.

 

So when the pews overflow with members who would normally, at church time, have their tailgating party all set up, what does that tell you? Christians love a good fight.

 

So, Mr. Cummins succeeds in filling seats again and isn’t that the whole point?

 

“Oh, He’s bringing people to Christ!” Yea, but he forgot to tell you about the “contribution”.

 

You can bet the donation plates will be overflowing. Hey, who wouldn’t pay to see a good fight? The smart money is on Cummins.

 

Look for an update here next week, if anything good happens.

Michigan Minister Sent to Prison for Warning Judge He Could be Tortured by God

Associated Press, Wednesday, 11/12/2008

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,451086,00.html

DETROIT  —  The American Civil Liberties Union is taking up the case of a southwestern Michigan minister who was sent to prison for warning that a judge could be tortured by God.

The ACLU said it asked the state appeals court Wednesday to release the Rev. Edward Pinkney on bail while he appeals a probation violation. Lawyers claim his free-speech rights were trampled in Berrien County.

In 2007, Pinkney, 60, was convicted of paying people to vote in a Benton Harbor election.

Months later, he wrote an article in a Chicago newspaper, People’s Tribune, saying the judge who handled his case, Alfred Butzbaugh, could be punished by God with curses, fever and “extreme burning” unless he changed his ways.

In June 2008, another Berrien County judge, Dennis Wiley, sent Pinkney to prison for three to 10 years after finding that he had violated his probation by making a threat against the judge.

“Those are words that would … put the fear of God into anybody, as a threat that this could happen to them if they do not do what Mr. Pinkney wants him to do, whatever that might be,” Wiley said, according to a transcript.

“To our knowledge, this case marks the first time in modern history that a preacher has been imprisoned for predicting what God might do,” said Michael Steinberg, legal director for the ACLU in Michigan.

Pinkney is in a state prison in the Upper Peninsula, roughly 600 miles from his home. While incarcerated, he received 3,500 votes as the Green Party candidate for Congress in Michigan’s 6th District.

____________________

Can you go to prison for saying a judge has lost his mind?

That is not to say the Rev. Pinkney is not wrong, delusional and just fucking crazy as a loon. He was convicted of paying people to vote in a Benton Harbor election. Not to “Christian”.

Everything was OK, until Ole’ Pinky wrote that the Judge in his case, Alfred Butzbaugh, “could be punished by God with curses, fever and “extreme burning” unless he changed his ways”.

I mean, Pinky was on probation. What do you do when you’re on probation? Shut the fuck up!!

Again, a religious asshole threatens someone who interferes with his illegal activity with retribution from the Almighty. It’s like God is this guy’s hit man or something. What’s with the “curses, fever and “extreme burning”? Just ask God to kill the guy, although after R&R in Bangkok, I was pissing razor blades for a month. So I’m here to tell you “extreme burning” is a serious threat.

So another Judge throws the book at him and he’s in the Big House for three to ten. Who is the craziest, the religious asshole who uses God as a threat, or the Judge who takes him seriously?

There has to be more to this than a loony “threat”. I mean if he had made a voodoo doll of the Judge and tried to put a curse on him, would that still be considered a violation of probation?  How far do you want to take this? Pretty soon we’ll be putting five year olds in the slammer for calling some one a “pee pee head”. My kid almost got kicked out of Kindergarten for saying that….and peaking under the teacher’s skirt, which I defended as “boyish curiosity”. Christ, you would of thought he tied her down and did Her in front of the class, the way the bitch was acting.

I suppose I didn’t help matters much when I reminded her that irritability in middle aged women is often due to lack of sexual fulfillment. Hey, I thought I was helping.

Anyway, the ACLU sees “merit in this case” so you can bet it’s going to continue to be a circus.

Personally, they should throw Pinky and the ACLU in a deep hole and toss a little food in everyday, until the noise stops. Then, just file the hole. Or fill in the hole first. Who gives a shit.

The real scary thought is that Pinky was running for public office and actually got some votes. It just goes to prove my point. The problem with America today is that there are a lot of people should not be allowed to reproduce, vote or drive cars.

 

 

 

More Bullshit from the Pope.

 

Here is the article By Flavia Krause-Jackson and Lorenzo Totaro, from Bloomberg:

Market Economy and Ethics

 

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/11/20/pope_prediction/

 

 

Pope Had `Prophecy’ of Market Collapse in 1985, Tremonti Says

Nov. 20 (Bloomberg) — Pope Benedict XVI was the first to predict the crisis in the global financial system, a “prophecy” dating to a paper he wrote when he was a cardinal, Italian Finance Minister Giulio Tremonti said.

 

“The prediction that an undisciplined economy would collapse by its own rules can be found” in an article written by Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, who became pope in April 2005, Tremonti said yesterday at Milan’s Cattolica University.

 

German-born Ratzinger in 1985 presented a paper entitled “Market Economy and Ethics” at a Rome event dedicated to the Church and the economy. The future pope said a decline in ethics “can actually cause the laws of the market to collapse.”

 

Pope Benedict in an Oct. 7 speech reflected on crashing markets and concluded that “money vanishes, it is nothing” and warned that “the only solid reality is the word of God.”

 

The Vatican’s official newspaper, l’Osservatore Romano, on the same day criticized the free-market model for having “grown too much and badly in the past two decades.”

 

 

The entire text of the Pope’s bullshit article can be found here:

 

http://www.acton.org/publications/occasionalpapers/publicat_occasionalpapers_ratzinger.php

 

I read this article several times and Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger (is Cardinal his middle name?), who is now Pope Benedict XVI, basically says an undisciplined economy would collapse by its own rules. No shit.

 

I saw nothing that would remotely indicate the Pope “prophesied” the present economic situation, but read it yourself.  I would say an undisciplined AND unregulated economy would collapse by its own rules. Is that a big revelation? Did God tell me that in a dream? No. It’s only common sense. As a Conservative, I advocate minimal governmental interference in the free market, but at times things really have to be regulated or people will be scammed.

 

The point is here that the Catholics, ever on the lookout for some shred of credibility, hail some statements as a “Prophesy” made by Grand Master P. predicting the economic crisis we have today.  Is there evidence of a divine prophesy in this article, from the Pope?

 

The Pope-a-Dope article speaks in very vague and general terms. It seems His real theme is that morality should be an integral part of the market, or the economy. Since that doesn’t happen, according to him in a free market, his article actually advocates a centralized market or Socialism.

 

 From the article:

 

“Following the tradition inaugurated by Adam Smith , this position holds that the market is incompatible with ethics because voluntary “moral” actions contradict market rules and drive the moralizing entrepreneur out of the game. For a long time, then, business ethics rang like hollow metal because the economy was held to work on efficiency and not on morality. The market’s inner logic should free us precisely from the necessity of having to depend on the morality of its participants. The true play of market laws best guarantees progress and even distributive justice.”

 

“Distributive justice”?? The Pope advocates Socialism, not a free market.

 

This is driven home when he advocates “a centralized economy, where the goal is equal rights for all and proportionate distribution of goods to all.”

 

Again with the socialism. Hey, look at the glowing record of Communist regimes and the huge 20^th Century experiment in socialism. They all went broke, you stupid shit.

 

So, Pope Benny, let’s look at the root of any economic system, human behavior. Say, a person is standing in front of a movie theater, looking at the marquis. What drives that person’s choice of movie he goes to see and thus spends his hard earned cash on?

 

What is his choice based on? What ever type of movie HE likes. Does he consider that all the people that made, distribute and were in anyway involved with the “Sex in the City” movie, have families, and need money for food, clothing, shelter and medical care? Do you ever think about that? Shit no.

 

Neither does He. He ain’t going to see no “Chick Flick”. He likes Sci Fi, action and adventure, sophomoric comedies. He is not about to go see a “Chick Flick”. He chooses “Batman” because HE wants to see “Batman”. It is a totally selfish decision, made without any thought of who may benefit or suffer from his decision.

 

What drives a person’s spending preferences? Concern for others? Shit no. You buy what you want. The free market works best when they give you what you want. Is morality an issue? Yes. A free market cannot exist without a, sort of “moral” underpinning.

 

Does the product do what they say and you expect it will? Is it of a quality you expect and are happy with? Is it priced competitively? Is the product harmful? Is it toxic (is it Chinese?). If it doesn’t meet your requirements, you won’t buy it and in a free market, someone else will fill your demand with what you want.  So, each company knows what standard they have to meet to sell their products.

 

The free market cannot be totally free. There are necessary health and safety standards, that are a pain in the ass and add to the price of a product, but they do protect the public. If they didn’t, by now the Chinese, those masters of quality, would have killed all our infants and pets. Minimal regulation is a must. Even a fee market advocate realizes that greed, unchecked, has the potential to ultimately cause great harm. So some sort of legislated “morality” is necessary. How much is debatable.

 

But “a centralized economy, where the goal is equal rights for all and proportionate distribution of goods to all”? Socialism, which destroys the entrepreneurial drive essential for progress? The basic premise is that if I am going to get the same amount of money as the guy who picks up my garbage, why should I go to engineering school, make the effort to be a doctor or try to start a new business that would be strangled by the government before it had a chance? I wouldn’t. No one would. The economy would stagnate. But it’s clear that socialism is advocated by the Pope and the Catholic Church.

 

But, don’t confuse us with fact. “He was the first to predict the crisis in the global financial system, a “prophecy” dating to a paper he wrote when he was a cardinal, Italian Finance Minister Guilio Tremonti said.”

 

Again, the Catholic Church is so desperate for any tangible evidence that proves its credibility that from this rambling almost incoherent document that deals far more with the idea of Socialism as being superior to a free market, they some how fabricate a “prophesy”.

 

The only thing that remotely talks about economic problems is this statement: “Conversely, it has also become obvious that the decline of such discipline can actually cause the laws of the market to collapse.” Ok, a decline in discipline can cause a free market to collapse. I don’t need God to tell me this.

 

This is not the first crises the free market has been in and it won’t be the last. The Pope wrote this shit ball socialistic article in 1985. We have had several stock market bubbles pop, Japan’s economy collapsed and has been dormant for years. The US has had several recessions and smaller real estate bubbles. Economies ebb and flow. The free market lives on. I don’t need God to reveal that to me either.

 

Funny, the Pope didn’t prophesy the down fall of the Soviet Union and the ultimate failure of the great Socialist experiment.  According to the article, he foresaw the “free market crises” while advocating Socialism and then just a few years later, the greatest Socialist market in history collapses.

 

We are to believe he was really talking about the current situation in his article, 23 years ago, ignoring all the crises weather they were in the free market or the socialistic world, which happened in the interim. Yea, right.

 

To wrap it up, the Catholics manufacture a Prophesy from an article the Pope wrote, 23 years ago, on the merits of Socialism over the free market. What a bunch of fucking morons.

 

No statements in the Pope’s article in any way shape of form can be interpreted as predicting the present economic situation. Hey, if you don’t have anything, make something up.

 

 

 

Church Challenges It’s Married Parishioners To Have Sex 7 Days In A Row.

 

I was alerted to this story by a faithful reader, Don T. Cornholeme, Here’s the Story:

7 Days Of Sex Challenge

Layron Livingston, KLTV, Jacksonville, Florida

7 straight days of sex. That was the challenge Pastor Ed Young issued to all of the married couples at his Grapevine church. Too taboo, or right on time? Whatever your opinion, this conversation and tonight’s story is strictly for adults. KLTV 7′s Layron Livingston sat down with some local pastors to see if the message could make it’s way to your church’s pulpit.

“Everybody’s whining about the economy and about the world….let’s move from whining to whoopee!”

The message caught some members of Fellowship Church by surprise, and its perking the ears of East Texans.

“Between a married man and a married woman…the more, the better.”

Young says the challenge will help couples in his church focus on each other, reclaiming sex for married people.

“I think I’ll try it this evening!”

Reverend Jerome Milton says it’s about time.

“God’s Word has addressed it, we won’t preach it. This challenge sort of stirs all of us up to teach and to preach it, so that people can have a better understanding about it,” said Rev. Milton.

“And if we don’t address this, then I guarantee you, Desperate Housewives will!”

Minister Mark Edge says sex is in the Bible. So why not the church? In fact, he says last week’s sermon was about Christian sexuality.

“God’s Word is certainly not ashamed to talk about this. God’s Word understands. God understands that it is a very important part of our lives….we really should have been talking about this all along,” said Edge.

“I think the concept is awesome,”

Pastor Doug Clark agrees, but says it’s unrealistic to expect struggling relationships to simply get better with a week of sex. He says sex is more than just physical.

“There’s so much about connection, emotion stuff…there’s so much about value that’s being passed back and forth. If a wife doesn’t feel valued, or if a husband doesn’t feel love or respected, hey, there’s some issues that have to be dealt with,” said Clark.

Of course, you have to practice what you preach. Pastor Young says his membership includes him and his wife. They’ve also accepted the challenge.

Here’s the link.

http://www.kltv.com/global/story.asp?s=9366764

It’s about time church began to recognize and promote the importance of sex. The Bible does talk about it and it is one of my favorite past times, so I say go for it. But I think that Pastor Ed while meaning well, may have done more harm than good.

The Pastor leaves a lot of questions unanswered. Like what about gay couples and the unmarried, “undo-ables” in the flock? You know, the old skinny guy, with the wart on his chin whose breath smells like he’s been eating an ass sandwich? What of the frumpy, middle aged divorcee’ with three kids that no one would do on a bet? Or the old horny spinster? Can you have sex in the church balcony during the services without being seen? These are important questions that demand answers.

Actually, since I have no shame or taste, I do have some experience in doing an old horny spinster. I was 17 and I don’t know how old she was. She was borderline do-able, but she was kind enough to get me buzzed on peppermint schnapps first. When we got into bed, she asked me if I would mind if she called me Rupert.

I said I didn’t mind. “Is that the name of you’re late husband?” I asked.

“No” she replied, with a look of confusion, “Why would you think that?

Before I could reply, she was on me like stink on shit. Now, with this type of “woman”, you just have to be prepared for anything. In certain sexual encounters, having false teeth is a plus. However, not if they come out in your mouth, while kissing. For years after that I was obsessively compelled to check the teeth of every woman I dated.

While we were getting it one, she screamed out every name but Rupert. The names I recall were Sam, Orville, Percy, Woodrow, Elroy, Fritz, Mr. President, Nakita and Eleanor.

I was real curious about the last one and meant to ask about it, but I got distracted when she lost her false teeth again and we pulled the bed apart looking for them. She hopped out of bed and went into the bathroom to rinse them. That’s when I got a good look at her naked. It may not have been so bad, but the schnapps was wearing off, so in a moment that can only be described as panic coupled with an intense self loathing, I grabbed my clothes and bolted for the door.

I was constantly reminded about our encounter for a couple of weeks there after, by the smell of Ben-Gay and mothballs that had somehow, in that short time permeated my clothes and body. I threw away the clothes but no amount of showering seemed to diminish the smell. I felt like everywhere I went, when people got a sniff, they were thinking, “Dude did a spinster. What an asshole”.

Fortunately the smell went away before my “cleaning out the attic for my Mom” excuse ran out of steam.

But the real point here is, that Pastor Ed’s admonition to “have sex for 7 days”, may cause more harm than good.

 

Here’s Pastor Ed, giving his sermon and showing the congregation his dick, during the masturbation portion of the program.

Like I said, what about the unmarried and undo-ables? He has to get off this “sex/marriage” thing. I would form a committee and see if you could pair up the losers.

But I bet he created a real problem among the married couples too. Every married guy got a grin on his face, while every married woman was wishing the Pastor would shut the fuck up.

This scenario, no doubt repeated itself in many of the parishioners homes that evening:

“But, Charlotte, honey, you heard what the Pastor said!”

“Delroy, does the Pastor drink beer all afternoon on Sunday watching football in his underwear? I wouldn’t mind it so much if my parents weren’t here. Does the Pastor leave a partially disassembled automatic transmission from a 1971 Chevy on the kitchen table for months? Kind of puts a girl out of the mood”

“But Honey, it’s a classic!”

“Classic, my ass. Does the Pastor use his wife’s good china for skeet shooting?” Says Charlotte, hands on her hips.

“But Honey, you said the whole set was ruined after that cup broke, when I threw it at the dog”

“Do you ever buy me flowers? Do you ever take me out to dinner, and no I don’t count tailgating at a football game as being taken out to dinner. Do you ever say you love me?

Do you do show you care about me with anything a hug, a peck on the cheek or bathing more than once a week?” By now Charlotte’s lower lip is trembling and a tear runs down her cheek.

Delroy, “If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a hundred times, why bathe everyday, when you’re only going to get dirty again? And what does love, flowers and going out to dinner have to do with this? The Pastor said we should have sex. You don’t want to displease Jesus, Charlotte”

With that, Charlotte, winds up and with a perfectly executed side arm pitch hits old Delroy square in the forehead with a porcelain gravy boat, the only piece of her good set of china that survived Delroy’s drunken skeet shooting spree.

So there are and will be all kinds of unknown repercussions from Pastor Ed’s sex challenge. I don’t think he really thought this one through.

There will likely be an uptick in emergency room visits as the “Delroys” of the Church require medical attention from all sorts of spouse inflicted wounds and from wart faced guys with their dicks stuck in vacuum cleaners. Domestic violence complaints will go up, as will the sale of wart remover, Ben Gay and batteries.

There is one thing that won’t happen. In the words of Pastor Doug Clark “If a wife doesn’t feel valued, or if a husband doesn’t feel love or respected, hey, there’s some issues that have to be dealt with.” Does Doug actually live in the real world and know any real people?

Love, respect, valued?? This is when religion really fucks up. They pump people’s heads full of this type of shit.

Sex is about draining the lizard and getting a good nights sleep. In the immortal words of Delroy, “And what does love, flowers and going out to dinner have to do with this? The Pastor said we should have sex. You don’t want to displease Jesus, Charlotte”

I’m sure Jesus is shaking his head, wondering as always, why God even bothered to create humans in the first place.

You may think I’m making this up, but I’m pretty sure that my experience with the spinster became an actual episode of Desperate Housewives. Except they changed it a little with Teri Hatcher playing the spinster and Brad Pitt played me. I could tell that it was adapted from my story, as they had a neighbor, Ben, who was gay.

I know for sure that an episode of CSI Miami was an adaptation of my spinster story. They evidence that hung the guy was the moth ball and Ben Gay residue in his underwear.

“I guess you could say we got him by the balls…” says Horatio, dramatically putting on his sun glasses”….moth balls!”

Mark Cummins, The Pastor of The First Baptist Church in Ocala, Florida Quits.

From the Ocala Star Banner, November 27, 2008:

Embattled minister quits post

http://www.ocala.com/article/20081127/ARTICLES/811271001

For more background, read my post “A Big Baptist Brawl in Florida!!!” on November 11th. But basically what happened is discontent with the new minister, Mark Cummins, erupted into a brawl and a shouting match during Sunday services on November 9th. I describe the scene in my Nov 11th post. It was not pretty.

As usual, in any controversy, no one has a clear picture of what happened, why or when. I think the “who” part is pretty clear. Pastor Mark got 6 associate Pastors fired and now, after stirring up all that shit is going to quit anyway….or is he??

This whole thing has split the church, which is no stranger to controversy as it recently split several years ago either over if “dwarf tossing ” was Christian or if they should rebuild their burned down church on the same property or buy a new, bigger piece of land and build a new and bigger church. I forget which but I think it was “where to build the new church” thing.

I think they still allow dwarf tossing, but just not in church. Bible scholars disagree on weather or not Jesus condoned or actually participated in dwarf tossing, but there is some compelling evidence he not only condoned it, but practiced it.

In Matthew 21:12 it says “Then Jesus went into the temple, threw out everyone who was selling and buying in the temple, and overturned the moneychangers’ tables and the chairs of those who sold doves.”

There were no doubt a number of dwarves that were “thrown” out by Jesus. Some Bible translations render the word here translated as “chairs” as “booster seat” and since children were not allowed in the temple, the logical conclusion would be that a number of the “thrown” out money changers were indeed short or dwarves.

There are other Bible accounts of “Dwarves” and Jesus. In Luke, Chapter 19:1 thru 4 it mentions one:

“And he entered and was passing through Jericho. And behold, a man called by name Zacchaeus; and he was a chief publican, and he was rich. And he sought to see Jesus who he was; and could not for the crowd, because he was little of stature (dwarf). And he ran on before, and climbed up into a sycamore tree to see him: for he was to pass that way.

The account shows how Jesus stayed at his house that night and after a few hits of sacramental wine, he and the Apostles tossed old Zacchaeus around until they all passed out.

So, while there is ample Biblical and historical evidence that “dwarf tossing” was indeed a practice of the early Christians and promoted by Christ himself, some modern day “Christians” think its wrong. These muddled brain, dip shits attempt to stop others from the legitimate practice of causing humiliation and pain to the weaker among us. Assholes.

But, hey Christians ignore other obvious Biblical facts. For example, a lot of “Christians” say it’s wrong to drink alcohol, even though Jesus himself is said in the Bible to have turned water into wine. Clearly, Jesus didn’t object to drinking alcohol.

“Oh, he didn’t make wine with alcohol. He made sweet wine, which is grape juice!” some namby-pamby, limp wristed Christian pussys will say, to which I reply, bullshit. Jesus was evidently a cool partier, who knew the difference between grape juice and wine. Some scholars say that the “wine” Jesus made was actually beer.

But when the candy ass, girly men, known collectively as the French got their turn at translating the Bible, they changed the beer to wine. Actually beer and wine are similar in that they are fermented plant stuff, beer being grain and “hops” (whatever the hell they are, but thank God for them) and wine being grapes.

So, the girly men, candy ass, French pussys changed “beer” to “wine” forever perverting Jesus words and giving us a whole different view of the Savior, from a beer drinking manly man to an effeminate, wine sipping, Brea nibbling, loving, kind, nice guy. Even faced with the account of JC kicking ass in the temple, throwing dwarves and all out on there ear, the Fench refused to change wine to beer.

Does kicking ass in the Temple sound like a wine drinker to you? So, afterwards, Jesus and the Apostles celebrated the temple ass whipping by hoisting a few Cabernet Sauvignons? Not hardly!

The sissy French also tried to change the Bible account that speaks of “manna” from heaven to “soufflés” from heaven but their plot was thwarted by the English, namely King James who told them to fuck off and wrote his own Bible, with absolutely no mention of “soufflés”. However, it is to be noted that he didn’t have the balls to change the wine thing back to the original “beer”. Asshole.

But, “what does this have to do with Pastor Mark and the First Baptist Church of Ocala, Florida” you might ask? Actually, nothing, but I never miss the opportunity to write about beer or piss on the French.

So, Mark is out…..or so it would seem. My sources tell me that the crafty old Marine has got a surprise for those dickheads who oppose him. A Marine doesn’t quit. It’s clearly a diversion.

Rumor has it that Mark has formed his loyalists into an elite fighting unit and is planning a frontal assault on the church, timed for exactly 20 minutes after the Sunday sermon begins, right when everyone is usually asleep.

He has been drilling them and drilling them hard in his secret base in the Ocala National Forest. There are numerous reports of gunfire, explosions and the hauntingly sound of hymns, late at night in one of the unexplored areas of the Forest.

Also, an assortment of people have been showing up at local hospitals with injuries that can only be explained by “intense military training”. Several elderly women have been admitted with injuries consistent with parachute jumping, although each insisted that there wounds were “knitting related”.

One old gentleman had swallowed his false teeth, which he claimed was caused by him being startled awake during an episode of “Dancing with the Stars”. However, doctors thought his condition was more consistent with hanging your head out the widow of a moving Humvee and smacking into a tree.

There was also a guy brought in with a bayonet stuck in his left ass cheek, but it was later determined that his wife did it when she found out he ate the last of the Cheeze Wiz.

These rumors have been taken seriously by the remaining Church members and they have erected barriers, dug tank traps and could be seen this week, fortifying their defensive positions.

When someone approached and asked what was going on,a stern looking guy in a green ball cap and mirrored sunglasses replied “landscaping”.

“That doesn’t look like landscaping to me” the curious passer by said, where upon he was tossed off the property and he wasn’t even a dwarf!

Something tells me that the conflict is not over between the Ocala Baptists and Pastor Mark. The situation is so serious that Dr. John Sullivan, a widely respected leader of the Florida Baptist Convention has agreed to mediate the dispute. Even with the threat of imminent military conflict, Sullivan still intends to visit the church on Sunday as planned.

Dr. Sullivan was unsuccessful in his last attempt to mediate differences between two Baptist Churches. You may recall the conflict in South Florida between The Hollywood First Baptist Church and the Gay Redeemer Baptist, of South Beach in Miami. The two congregations were at odds over the admission of gays to the Ministry and the disagreement erupted in to violence.

The Hollywood Baptists, en mass charged into the Gay Redeemer Church during services one Sunday, brandishing paint sprayers and spray painted everything and everyone pink.

A sobbing Pastor Hugh Jass, Pastor of GRB had to be taken to the hospital and sedated.

After the melee the membership decided that they liked everything pink, so they left it. Frustrated at their failed attempt to run the queer bastards out of town, the members of HFBC took a different tack and bought up the entire supply of Barbara Streisand, Village People and Queen CD’s in the area.

Unable to withstand what he called mean spirited, unchristian, cultural guerrilla warfare”, Pastor Jass and the other fags disbanded GRD. The guys at the HFBC celebrated by building a big bon fire and burning all that nauseating Streisand shit. They also reportedly tossed a few dwarves around.

“I swear” said one participant “you could see the image of Streisand, with horns screaming at us in the flames”

The situation in Ocala remains serious and many questions remain: Will Dr. Sullivan be able to stop full scale military action? Will Pastor Mark, the hard nose jarhead be able to whip his followers into an elite fighting force? Why didn’t the South Beach queers join the Methodists in the first place? They love fags.

Tense times in a tense little town in Florida.

Has God Determined That You Are Already Dead?

From Genesis, Chapter 6, vs. 13 thru 22, American Standard Version:

“And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth. ^6:14Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch. ^6:15And this is how thou shalt make it: the length of the ark three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits. ^6:16A light shalt thou make to the ark, and to a cubit shalt thou finish it upward; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; with lower, second, and third stories shalt thou make it. ^6:17And I, behold, I do bring the flood of waters upon this earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein is the breath of life, from under heaven; everything that is in the earth shall die. ^6:18But I will establish my covenant with thee; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons’ wives with thee. ^6:19And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every sort shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep them alive with thee; they shall be male and female. ^6:20Of the birds after their kind and of the cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the ground after its kind, two of every sort shall come unto thee, to keep them alive. ^6:21And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and gather it to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them. ^6:22Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.”

We all know the story of Noah and the Ark. God caused a great flood to occur, killing every one on earth while only Noah and his family survived, with two of every animal, seven of certain animals.

Interestingly, the Jehovah’s Witness rag, The Watchtower, 4/15/05, page 4 says this of Noah:

 ”According to the Bible, the Creator will soon transform the earth into a literal paradise, which will favor long life. Bringing about that Paradise will involve drastic action, similar to that of the Flood of Noah’s day. Matthew chapter 24, verses 37 to 39, shows that Jesus compared our time with “the days of Noah,” in which people “took no note” of their critical situation. They also ignored the message that Noah preached. Then came “the day that Noah entered into the ark” and the Flood destroyed all who had rejected this knowledge. Noah and those with him in the ark remained alive.”

 The Witnesses directly contradict the above Watchtower in another Witness publication, “Insight on the Scriptures” as regards Noah preaching:

The “Insight on the Scriptures” Vol 2, page 674 quotes Vine’s Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words says: “In I Pet. 3:19 the probable reference is, not to glad tidings (which there is no real evidence that Noah preached, nor is there evidence that the spirits of antediluvian people are actually ‘in prison’), but to the act of Christ after His resurrection in proclaiming His victory to fallen angelic spirits.” (1981, Vol. 3, p. 201)”

So did Noah preach a warning of the flood or not? Who knows? The Jo Ho’s say yes and no. As a side point you may wonder why I bring this up at all. Well, since Jehovah’s Witnesses the only organization on earth that understands the “deep things of God”, they shouldn’t publish contradictory views:

Watchtower 7/1/73, pg 402

Consider, too, the fact that Jehovah’s organization alone, in all the earth, is directed by God’s holy spirit or active force. (Zech. 4:6) Only this organization functions for Jehovah’s purpose and to his praise. To it alone God’s Sacred Word, the Bible, is not a sealed book. Many persons of the world are very intelligent, capable of understanding complex matters. They can read the Holy Scriptures, but they cannot understand their deep meaning. Yet God’s people can comprehend such spiritual things. Why? Not because of special intelligence on their part, but as the apostle Paul declared: “For it is to us God has revealed them through his spirit, for the spirit searches into all things, even the deep things of God.” (1 Cor. 2:10) Jesus Christ praised his heavenly Father for ‘hiding such things from the wise and intellectual ones but revealing them to babes.’ (Matt. 11:25) How very much true Christians appreciate associating with the only organization on earth that understands the “deep things of God”!

Sorry. I’m just “poking the Jo Ho’s” It’s my hobby. Hey, everyone needs a hobby.

The point here is that, early on, God gave Noah specific instructions on how to build the ark, how big it would be and what provisions to take on board.

God had already decided that only Noah and his family would survive the flood, and no on else. The plans he gave Noah had no room for anyone else. It’s likely that it took years to build the ark and yet the Bible indicates that Noah did not preach about the coming doom. Notwithstanding that the Witnesses say “Noah preached”, it would seem logical that of the thousands of people alive, surely some would noticed Noah building the Ark, asked him about it and wanted to join him.

The point, however is moot. God had already decided on the Arks dimensions, and thus it’s capacity to carry passengers. God had predestined the people of Noah’s day to die. He made no room for them on the Ark.

Sorry, no room for you. We only have so many suites. All booked.

So what was the point of the whole flood thing? Kill all the evil people and start over? Just kill them. Why the cataclysmic earth wide flood? By simple reasoning, by the fact that the Bible says only eight people survived and were in the ark and that God’s original blueprints called for the accommodation of just eight “souls” God already knew the outcome.

This raises the obvious question, “Has God already decided who will go to heaven/live forever/whatever?”

He obviously did in Noah’s day.

Jehovah’s Witnesses, Christmas and All Things Pagan.

 

It’s December 28, 2009 and I realize that even tough it’s after Christmas, I thought I would reprint this from last year at Christmas time. Enjoy.

It’s “that time of year”. Yes, it’s the Christmas season and time for the Jo Ho’s (Jehovah’s Witnesses) to begin the annual yada yada about “Christmas is pagan in Origin” and “Jesus wasn’t even born in December”. The simple response is “shut your fucking pie holes, who gives a shit!!”, but, other “Christians” get in the act and the Holiday Tradition begins anew as deranged Bible thumpers on many sides of this issue go back and forth about the birthday of a Jesus. They hurl scriptures at each other like so many holy hand grenades, all the while oblivious to the fact that there is no historical evidence Jesus was ever born.

So begins another big fight over when their imaginary friend was born, what he really meant when He wrote “My Big Book of Unsolvable and Improbable Cosmic Riddles”, aka, the Bible and who he likes best.

Being raised a Jo Ho, I didn’t celebrate Christmas until I was 50 and now I do only because my current wife does. I have no history with the holiday and do not believe in Jesus, so it has no significance for me. The truth be known, it’s a pain in the ass. Business stops from approx. Dec 15^th and resumes around Jan 5^th. Most none retail businesses anyway. But the bills don’t stop. So thank you, pagan assholes for giving us this special time of year, which causes financial pain, family feuds and physical pain in muscles you never knew you had, due to putting up all those damn decorations. Oh, and you have to take them down in January. 

It’s interesting to watch the Jo Ho’s get all paranoid and worked up about “things of pagan origin”. Now, they are factually correct. Most of the Christmas customs can be traced to either pagan customs or to religions the Jo Ho’s disagree with, which would be all other religions, but theirs.

However, if you dig deep enough, many customs and traditions that are common place today originated in pagan worship or were adopted by pagans.

For example, wedding and engagement rings. Some scholars believe it was originally an ancient Egyptian tradition symbolizing the eternal life. Today the circle is sacred to many people, representing that which has no beginning or end, except in case of divorce. To me and many others, it represents perpetual alimony.

It is actually said at Jo Ho weddings that the ring has no beginning and no end symbolizing something, what I don’t know, as the marriage bond terminates in death, according to the Jo Ho’s. But it is definitely pagan in origin.

The wedding ring cannot be found in the Old or New Testaments. There was no practice among early Christians to wear finger rings as a sign of marriage or an engagement.  Pope Gregory 1, aka “The Jeweler”, in 860AD decreed that as a required statement of nuptial intent, the groom to be had to give his intended an engagement ring. He further decreed the ring be of gold to signify financial sacrifice. And if you were a good Catholic and bought from his store, you got 10% off. Oh, and if you didn’t buy a ring and/or were a bad Catholic, he had you killed. The guy was a marketing genius! 

Opps! Jo Ho’s do what Pope Gregory decreed!! They buy engagement and wedding rings! A decree from the leader of a religion that isn’t them!! “Pagan origin, false religion…”

The ancient pagan Romans also the used engagement and wedding rings. Originally the ring was placed on the third finger of the left hand because of a superstitious belief that a vein from this finger runs directly to the heart. Wedding rings are still placed on the third finger of the left hand by the majority of wearers. 

The early Methodists in America, followed the teachings of John Wesley that wedding rings were pagan and should not be worn. Mennonites, early Baptist in America, The original Seventh Day Adventists, most of the holiness movements, including the more devout Apostolic Pentecostals rejected wedding rings as pagan. There was a time in America when the majority of Christians did not wear jewelry of any kind including earrings and wedding rings, until a lot of Pastors bought jewelry stores and than it was OK with God.

Cutting the cake together is also a potent symbolic act. As a form of the Great Rite (I don’t exactly know what that is, but it’s something really pagan), the cake represents the feminine traits of nurturing and life-giving while the knife symbolizes the male phallus or as it is commonly known, dick, pee pee, love pistol, wedding tackle, tally-whacker, twigs and berries, meat and two veg, trouser trout, love muscle, heat seeking moisture missle and my personal favorite, the moan inducing love rocket. The pagans thought that this practice boosts the fertility wishes and solidifies the joining together of male and female energies. 

They used a knife as a symbol of a dick. Dicks as a rule are not very sharp, thus while they have many uses, the average dick is not suitable for cutting a cake.  Although I do remember an incident involving cake frosting, licking and my dick, I wouldn’t want to try cutting a cake with it. Also, eating a cake that was cut by someone’s dick tends to put a damper on the joy of the occasion.

The wedding veil is also pagan in origin and was adopted by many cultures who each gave it some religious and/or Pagan significance. Although not directly involving dicks, the origin of the veil is should no doubt repulse the Jo Ho’s but again, they ignore it.  

Bon fires also have a pagan Druidic origin. Bon fires, originally “bone” fires, were used in their pagan ceremonies but did not directly involve dicks. 

Most of the names of the Months and Day are pagan in origin, for example January is taken from the Roman God Janus. Have you ever noticed that a lot of the statues of Roman gods are naked, showing their dicks?

So while Jo Ho’s and others decry you Pagan, counterfeit Christians for celebrating a Christmas, a holiday with pagan roots they themselves continue many pagan traditions. 

I can tell you that as a Jehovah’s Witness at Jo Ho weddings, I have personally seen and participated in buying engagement and wedding rings and placing them on the third finger of the left hand of the Bride, except for my second wife, who lost three fingers on  her left hand in a bar fight and I had to put it on her pinky. I also participated in cutting the wedding cake together and my brides wore veils. I might add that these events always ended badly for me, but that’s another story. 

Also, at Jo Ho gatherings there were bon fires and I frequently used the names of the Days and Months, a practice I continue to this day. 

There are many questions that demand answers! When does all this “Pagan origin” stuff stop? Why do Jehovah’s Witnesses and others avoid, some customs of Pagan origin and embrace others? If the cutting of the wedding cake and what it symbolizes is pagan to the extreme, with sexual overtones, why don’t Jo Ho’s stop doing that?? What other pagan customs involve dicks? 

Did you know Jo Ho’s do not toast, i.e. hold a glass of something up and clink everyone else’s glass in honor of someone or something? Why? 

Jo Hos: “It’s pagan! It’s Ok to cut a cake with a dick, but we will not emulate pagans and clink glasses!! 

Funny, at one Witness wedding, the head Elder, in front of about 200 people stood and proposed a toast with a glass of wine to the bride and groom. His wife had to pull him back down and tell him “we don’t do that” 

Watchtower 1/1/68. pg 31-32:

But is that all there is to “toasting”? Why do the toasters raise their glasses, or lift their mugs and clink them together? Is it in imitation of some custom? Note what The Encyclopædia Britannica, 11th Ed., Volume 13, page 121, says: 

“The custom of drinking ‘health’ to the living is most probably derived from the ancient religious rite of drinking to the gods and the dead. The Greeks and Romans at meals poured out libations to their gods, and at ceremonial banquets drank to them and to the dead.” Then, after showing how such pagan customs survived among Scandinavian and Teutonic peoples, this reference work adds: “Intimately associated with these quasi-sacrificial drinking customs must have been the drinking to the health of living men.” 

“When most people join in a “toast” they probably do not imagine that they might be copying the custom of lifting up a libation or liquid sacrifice to pagan gods, yet that could be so. Without question, a faithful Christian would not share in an actual pagan sacrifice, realizing that “you cannot be drinking the cup of Jehovah and the cup of demons.” (1 Cor. 10:21) A mature Christian would also avoid even imitating false religious rituals. This spiritually mature course would please Jehovah. Remember, God specifically warned the Israelites against copying religious practices of the pagan nations round about them.-Lev. 19:27; 21:5.” 

“If a Christian is going to make a request for divine blessing on another, then an appropriate way to do that is through heartfelt prayer to God, not by following traditions based on pagan worship that Jehovah abhors.” 

No, but he’ll cut a wedding cake with a knife symbolizes the male tally whacker! 

How many Jo Ho’s or other “Christians” would cut a wedding cake with a knife that symbolizes a dick? Hell, they do it all the time. Why? “When most people join in a “toast” they probably do not imagine that they might be copying the custom of lifting up a libation or liquid sacrifice to pagan gods, yet that could be so.” Same with the dick/knife thing, you boneheaded assholes!

People do not know, as the pagan symbolism has long ago been forgotten. Where do you draw the line as to what modern customs with their roots in paganism offend God and which do not? I would think the dick thing is a way bigger sin than the toast thing, but what do I know? 

Shit, I think the Jo Ho’s should cut a wedding cake on Christmas with a male phallus, while hoisting a beer in honor of all things phallic.

Does the general public know that many of the Christmas customs are pagan in origin? If they do it’s only because the Jo Ho’s pound on your door, unceasingly and tell you that among other loony stuff.

If the Witnesses are so all fired up about displeasing God by celebrating a holiday with pagan roots, than STOP DOING ALL THINGS WITH PAGAN ROOTS.

OK, Jesus wasn’t born on Dec 25th. So what! The shepherds were likely indoors hoisting a few, celebrating their dicks, while wearing wedding rings on the 4th finger of the left hand

The inescapable fact is that people normally do not associate Christmas with paganism. So, what is the big deal? And why don’t Jo Ho’s simply shut up about it?

A point to ponder. Jehovah’s Witness do not celebrate birthdays because both times when a birthday is celebrated in the Bible someone righteous gets killed. I forget her name and I’m not going to look it up, but one of the incidents was where this girl danced so good at the Kings Birthday party He promised her anything she wanted. At the urging of her mother, she asked for John the Baptist’s head on a plate.

I would have gone for the veal parmesan, but it was her choice

Another reason Jo Ho’s don’t celebrate birthdays is that Jesus said that the day of ones death was better than the day of ones birth, which I totally disagree with. Death has a way of screwing up your weekend. 

Unlike when your born and you get to lay around all the time, complain loudly at the slightest irritation, eat and poop. It’s like retirement.  Than in puberty, you discover your dick and quickly learn that it has other uses than cutting cakes. You get married, have kids, who as they go through the stages of growth, screw up you life in ways you can’t imagine, wrecking financial havoc on you every inch of the way. Than they discover their dicks. Which is cool for the boy kids, but when the girl kids discover the dicks of other boy kid’s, that’s when the trouble really starts. 

And the whole situation, your life deteriorates from there. Then you die and turn to poop. And they usually dress you up in a good suit, which you turn to poop in. Mmmm, maybe Jesus was right after all.

Back to the point. The Bible does not specifically forbid the celebration of birthdays. Also a lot of things happened when good guys got killed in the Bible. I mean, they were eating and dancing at John the Baptist’s demise. Using Jo Ho logic, you should quit eating and dancing.

They were probably doing things with dicks,  too.

But the Jo Ho’s basically pull the Birthday thing out of their asses and the imagined inference morph’s into “God does not want us to celebrate birthdays.” The birthday thing, at best is a stretch and again using Jo Ho reasoning, the cake/dick thing should be easy to see as a pagan practice to be abhorred. But, every Saturday, around the world hundreds or even thousands of Jo Ho couples get married, after buying engagement and wedding rings, than placing them each others fourth finger of the left hand, cutting the wedding cake together, with the dick-knife, all the while with the brides wearing veils.
Did you know Jo Ho’s don’t eat blood? But they are allowed to eat meat. That red stuff moving around in the package of steak at the supermarket ain’t tapioca. It is not possible to get all the blood out of meat, not matter how well you drain it. So, don’t eat meat.  But they do. “Those are the meat juices”, my mother would say.

Yea, and that was a cake knife you caught me playing with in the shower.

Consistency would go along way toward helping  Jo Ho credibility.

Some Logic and Reason that Explains the Actions and Unreasonable Beliefs of Religious Assholes

This is a very interesting article from USA Today that brings out some good points concerning the “end times” beliefs of many religious boneheads.

http://blogs.usatoday.com/oped/2008/12/the-end-as-a-we.html

‘The end’ as a weapon

Some environmentalists have their own fixation with the apocalypse – just not the biblical one. This involves the wrath of nature and the ecological end times. But  fear is an ineffective tool for any cause.

By Tom Krattenmaker

There is, in progressive circles, a certain fascination with those apocalyptic prophecies that seem to hold so many religious conservatives in thrall. From the sensation over the megaselling Left Behind book series to more recent media flare-ups around figures such as John Hagee (the television pastor of countdown-to-Armageddon fame), the end times seem to be looming at all times.

(Web Bryant / USA TODAY)

Turn your attention to a strain of thought ascendant in secular, environmentalist America and you might be surprised to find a similar apocalypse fixation, minus the Book of Revelation and anti-Christ parts. Call it the secular theology of environmental collapse – the fearful conviction that the hopelessly corrupt world as we know it has entered its death throes, with massive destruction stalking ever nearer.

Given the huge challenges facing this country and the constant barrage of “be afraid!” messages from politics and pulpits, it’s understandable that many of us have a close relationship with dread.

Yet we should remain wary of doomsday fantasizing, in either its religious or secular form. For history shows that such thinking, whether it revolves around the wrath of God or the rage of nature, has a way of embarrassing the doomsayers – and, more important, hampering much needed progress along the way.

Like many Americans, I’ve always been fascinated by the scary prophecies. (I do mean “many”; according to a 2004 Newsweek poll, 55%of Americans believe in the rapture, in which true Christian believers are swept up by God, with everyone else “left behind” to endure civilization’s trial, tribulation and destruction before Jesus returns to usher in a new and godly age.) I read Hal Lindsey’s The Late Great Planet Earth in my teens, Nostradamus’ spooky visions in college and ecological meltdown scenarios in adulthood. “Let’s wipe it all out and start again!” holds a certain appeal when the present state of affairs is looking irredeemably bad. Especially to the beholders who believe they’ll be among the “saved,” whether through divine intervention or, at least, by being on the right side of the argument.

More and more, I’m seeing the error of these ways, thanks mainly to my exposure to some of the new-wave thinkers in environmentalism and the related sustainability movement.

Two such people are Ted Nordhaus and Michael Shellenberger, whose widely circulated “death of environmentalism“arguments have shaken up the green establishment. They call for an end to the old disaster-is-coming talk in favor of a positive, solutions-oriented approach to the climate challenge.

Another is Jim Proctor, head of environmental studies at Lewis & Clark (the college where I work in Portland, Ore.). Proctor is also a teacher and researcher with academic training in religion as well as environmental studies. Through many intense conversations with Proctor, I’ve begun to suspect that secular liberals who joke about right-wing Christians’ doomsday scenarios fall for some of the same unproductive thinking and believing.

The ecopocalypse

Waiting for the rapture has its secular analog in a phenomenon you might term “dystopian dread”: a growing sense of imminent ecological collapse – the ecopocalypse, if you will. Particularly ascendant here in the lush green and relatively unchurched Pacific Northwest, the narrative offers a form of secular theology that resembles aspects of the Left Behind scenarios. Instead of God, nature unleashes its wrath on “sinful” humanity; instead of the savior’s second coming, ecotheology awaits a green utopia in which electric cars, locally grown organic food and post-consumer-culture sustainability rise in the ashes of disaster.

Proctor and a research team are exploring the phenomenon through interviews with members of utopian communities in Oregon and surveys of the general population. The preliminary polling results point in an intriguing direction. Secular Americans who regard nature as inherently sacred (a cohort that could include 20% of the population or more) identify strongly with concepts of an environmentalist utopia. And those who yearn for green perfection often struggle with expectations of its dark-side twin: “dystopian” doom.

“You find that people working for a utopian future have tremendous fear about things turning out differently,” Proctor explains. “Utopias are often framed against a dystopian nightmare,” he adds, producing a kind of all-or-nothing fixation on perfection and its perfect opposite.

Reality, in truth, is usually grayer and messier. Wind turbines, for instance, can certainly mar pristine views and wildlife habitat, and concerns of precisely that sort have been raised against wind-power farms in the Mojave Desert and elsewhere. Is the regrettable blemish a worthwhile price to pay to advance green energy?

As the dilemma suggests, maybe we should spend less time and angst on utopias and doomsdays and focus on the less dramatic question: Short of perfect, how do we make things simply better?

In certain conservative Christian circles, the rapture is viewed with something approaching gleeful excitement. As one devotee told CBS in a 2004 report on evangelical America, “I think (the rapture) would be really cool.”

I suppose – if you find something “cool” about untold millions stranded on a doomed earth and left to endure hellish suffering and death on an unprecedented scale.

Those sounding the alarm about ecological end times might not share the happy anticipation of the above-mentioned rapture diviner, but they might have more in common with his lot than they realize: the conviction, in particular, that civilization is hopelessly fallen and deserves whatever doom might be coming our way.

What this moment requires, instead, is acknowledgment of the inevitable uncertainty about where all this is heading, and clear thinking about what’s going to be effective in dealing with it.

Damaging the cause

If history has taught us anything, Jim Proctor notes, it’s the prevalence, and folly, of end-of-the-world predictions. “How many times,” Proctor asks, “have religious figures and others prophesized the end – and then had to revise their predictions when it didn’t happen? And how much less did people listen to them and believe them after that?”

Though fear might seem a good rally-the-masses motivator, it can actually operate in the opposite way, by making the general public cynical and disengaged on one hand, or overwhelmed by fear and fatalism on the other.

Yes, there is plenty to fear these days, and stoking that fear in the quest for supporters, donations and votes is the popular politics of our time.

As he assumes the presidency, Barack Obama would do well to reprise the line of a transformative president from the past century who urged calm and confidence through tough times. As Franklin D. Roosevelt wisely declared, fear itself is what we ought to fear the most. As Roosevelt evidently knew, fear has an uncanny ability to stymie progress.

And, worse yet, to turn its dark visions into self-fulfilling prophecies.

Tom Krattenmaker, who lives in Portland, Ore., specializes in religion in public life and is a member of USA TODAY’s board of contributors. His book on Christianity in professional sports will be published in the spring.

More Nonsense from Christian Assholes

Woman says Church

Threatening

to make Sins Public

http://www.news4jax.com/news/18286355/detail.html#-

POSTED: Monday, December 15 2008

 JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — A divorced Jacksonville woman said her former church has threatened to “go public with her sins” and tell the congregation about her sexual relationship with her new boyfriend. 

Rebecca Hancock said harassment from Grace Community Church in Mandarin over her sex life caused her to leave, but she said that didn’t put an end to the problem. She said she received a letter from the church’s elders telling her the church plans to make her personal life very public. 

“I’m basically run out. I’m the church harlot,” Hancock said. 

The 49-year-old said she has been dating a man for a while and she said members of the congregation at Grace Community Church haven’t been happy about the relationship. 

“Because I have a boyfriend that I’m involved with … to not be married to that person is a sin,” Hancock said. 

She said the issue caused her to leave the church. However, she said the church has not let go of her. 

The letter Hancock received from the church states that because she has refused to end her sexual relationship with her boyfriend, “you leave us with no other choice but to carry out the commands of the Lord Jesus Christ” … “In accordance with Matthew 18:17 we intend to ‘tell it to the church.’” 

“On January 4, my sins will be told to the church, publicly, with my children sitting in the church and my friends,” Hancock said. 

The pastor of Grace Community Church, Dr. T. Scott Christmas, told Channel 4 he had no comment. 

Pastors with whom Channel 4 spoke on Monday said announcing a sin to a congregation is not abnormal. They said it’s written in the Bible to punish sinners who continue to sin. 

The difference in Hancock’s case is that she has left the church, and the pastors said that’s is usually where punishment ends. 

Despite the church’s letter stating its biblical backing, Hancock said she has backed out of the church and they should leave her alone because she is no longer a member. 

“I am a Christian, and that will never change. My relationship with Jesus has to do with me and Jesus, and he knows my heart,” Hancock said. 

The book of Matthew does have three steps that the church talked about in taking action against a member who is in sin. 

Hancock said she is now attending a different church, and said she is planning to send a letter to Grace Community Church to make sure it’s understood that she no longer a member.

______________________________________________________

First, on behalf of Rebecca Hancock and my loyal readers, I would like to say to the Grace Community Church in Mandarin, Florida: Go fuck your collective selves, you pompous religious, hypocritical, cock sucking, busy body pieces of donkey shit.  

How many of you “holier then thou” churchies are right now fucking your secretary, lawn guy or molesting the 9 year old next door?

That being said, the real question is exactly how hot is Ms. Hancock and will they be publishing naked pictures of her? If they’re going to accuse her of fucking around, they need some real proof, like pictures or better yet, videos.

Exactly how does this work? How does anyone know for sure Becky is doing the nasty with her, here to fore unnamed male (or female) accomplice?

I would guess that they have no real “proof”, except circumstantial proof, like his car was parked at her house overnight, they have been seen in each others company around town etc., except for the fact that the stupid bitch broadcasts it, literally. She tells the TV news:

“I’m basically run out. I’m the church harlot,” Hancock said.

The 49-year-old said she has been dating a man for a while and she said members of the congregation at Grace Community Church haven’t been happy about the relationship.

“Because I have a boyfriend that I’m involved with … to not be married to that person is a sin,” Hancock said.

Good move, dumb ass. You basically admit it. What you should have said is “Mind your own fucking business”, when asked if you were fornicatin’.  But, noooo you tell the TV Station “I’m the church harlot”. You are a dumb ass. If you don’t want anyone to know, simply shut the hell up

Still, dumb ass blah blahs to the news about fucking some guy and worries about her kids hearing this in church.  So, I guess the kids don’t watch TV or talk to their friends, who I’m sure by now know all the sordid details.

But the long and the short of it is the church needs to mind their own fucking business. If Ms. Hancock wants to fuck a German Sheppard that’s her damn business. If the Church makes public “her fornicatin’, I would guess Becky will have a hell of a liable suit.

Curiously, if you are named Smith, your name originated from the occupation of your ancestors. The same with the last names Carpenter, Mason and Goatfucker, the later being a little know name common only in remote parts of Eastern Europe.  You don’t know many Goatfuckers because when any Goatfuckers got off the boat at Ellis Island, their names were Kennedy, Nixon or Obama.

So if your ancestral name is derived from your ancestor’s occupation, than what did Ms. Hancock’s ancestors do? Were their hands shaped like cocks? Did they run hand job parlors all over medieval countries whose names now end in -vokia or -stan? But more importantly, has Becky inherited the ancient methods and will they publish her phone number?

This brings up genealogical questions for anyone with “cock”, “dick” or “gay” in their last names. My Mothers ancestors came from Eastern Europe and when they hit Ellis Island the original name was Pladclitvagicockuszzcuntforudijga. This literally means “the goats are dying because of those goat fuckers”.  They immigration guys changed it to Rosenstein.

My last bit of advice is for Becky to capitalize on this and first sue the church and second, put up an internet site with her and “Mr. Here to fore unknown”, fucking in any manner and in as many places as they can. Hey, Beck, remember there is big money in hand jobs.

Faith and Mickey Mouse

From Reuters, December 19, 1996:

“Hundreds flock to Virgin apparition on office tower”

CLEARWATER, Florida (Reuter) – Hundreds of people converged on Clearwater Wednesday to see what they believe is a vision of the Virgin Mary on an office building.

“God is giving us a sign,” said Sister Martin, a nun of the Order of Saint Anne in Bangalore, India.

“The image, two floors high, first emerged last Thursday on the tinted windows of a finance company office. It glows and shimmers, turning from green to blue, to red, and there is a distinct outline of a head, a hooded robe and most of a torso.”

“Skeptics say it is caused by the sun reflecting off water left by sprinklers. But others believe it is a true miracle.”

“God is telling us it is time to change our ways,” said Sister Christian of the same order. “(It) looks exactly like all the paintings of the Blessed Mother

And we also have this from CBS News, April 20, 2005:

“Faithful See Image Of Virgin Mary “

“Stain On Wall Of Chicago Underpass Believed To Be Image Of Mary”

CHICAGO, April 20, 2005

“A steady stream of the faithful and the curious, many carrying flowers and candles, have flocked to an expressway underpass for a view of a yellow and white stain on a concrete wall that some believe is an image of the Virgin Mary”.

“Police have patrolled the emergency turnoff area under the Kennedy Expressway since Monday as hundreds of people have walked down to see the image and the growing memorial of flowers and candles that surround it. Beside the image is an artist’s rendering of the Virgin Mary embracing Pope John Paul II in a pose some see echoed in the stain.”

“We believe it’s a miracle,” said Elbia Tello, 42. “We have faith, and we can see her face.”

So are we to believe that God is communicating with us via stains on a window and a concrete wall? The belief in the Virgin Mary is basically a Catholic belief, so is this validating Catholicism? If so, than is this saying all other Religions are false? After all, Pope Benedict XVI reasserted the universal primacy of the Roman Catholic Church, approving a document that says Orthodox churches were defective and that other Christian denominations were not true churches. I guess all you Baptist, Protestants, Jehovah’s Witnesses and other Christians got your collective faiths trumped by a stain. Somehow, I find that fitting.

This whole fiasco reminds me of when you were a kid and you laid down on the lawn and stared at the cloud. After a while they would take on the form of a ship, a dog, whatever you could imagine. Aside from the fact that there is no proof that Mary even existed, there is no doubt that the images in question look like renderings of the Virgin Mary. Since we have no photos of Mary, we only have artist’s conceptions of what she might have looked like, so the best we can say is that they resemble an artist conception. It’s a safe bet that if you looked at stains on windows and concrete all day you could find numerous images of people and things.

Random coincidental images that appear to look like an artist conception is really thin. But the really sad part is the reaction from thousands of people. These incidents illustrates several pertinent facts.

First, people will believe really unreasonable stuff, particularly if it supports their already existing faith. In the Bible, God spoke directly to many people. He supposedly perfomed or caused to be performed many miracles, witnessed by thousands. So now he has reduced his communication to stains on walls and windows?

When were we notified that he changed his methods? Oh yea, in the Bible, when it says that the real cool, very convincing miracles would cease. That’s real convenient.The Bible writers relate these fabulous, supernatural events, witnessed by thousands and we get stains. Why? Because there is not a shread of evidence that the events in the Bible actually happened. Perhaps there was a stain on a rock that looked like the Red Sea parting and someone ran with it. I can’t prove that happened and you can’t prove it didn’t.

Also, people will seize on these incidents as proof of their faith because it is the only thing resembling a fact and they are thirsting for any tangible proof of their faith, any “miracle”.

Religion is so short on facts, the faithful have to resort to “divine” random occurring stains to bolster their beliefs.

It’s sad when grown, intelligent normally reasonable people will seize on and venerate a stain. It’s past sad. It’s pathetic.

But the most apparent and perhaps the most significant fact of all is that people would be highly receptive to an appearance by God himself. The window and concrete stains were obvious random occurring phenomena, not a sign from God. The significant point is people’s reaction. The faithful have never seen substantial, factual proof of their faith and to many, here it was.

Where is God? Does this not prove that should God appear to the human race and speak a few words, he could stop a lot of suffering and answer a lot of burning questions that would put the question of his existence to rest? If he appeared every generation or so, life here on earth would be vastly different. We humans have short attention spans, so say every thirty years or so, God could put in an appearance. He could give us the basic rules to live by in one or two pages, not cryptically woven into a book that by its very nature invites thousands of interpretations. Certainly life would be much better. It would clear up a lot of questions.

“Sure I believe in God! I saw him in 1958 and than in 1988. Everyone believes in God”

I believe an awe inspiring appearance by the Creator would a good thing.

Still haven’t seen Him. It doesn’t prove or disprove his existence. I’m a Deist. I believe in intelligent design, call it God or whatever. It’s a conclusion I’ve come to from observing nature. Not everyone shares my view. I don’t have the answers, just questions. Apparently, the entity that has all the answers and who could easily settle all this controversy, prefers not to.

Those professing faith will seize on proof of their faith, no matter how thin, no matter how unreasonable, no matter how just plain silly. It’s really sad. Not because these people believe that a water stain on a window is a sign from God.

It’s sad because it isn’t a sign from God. These people are desperate for divine guidance and they get none.

Instead, their urge to believe gets manipulated and exploited by Organized Religion.

If naturally occurring images are God’s way of communicating with us than we might want to look into the religious significance of Mickey Mouse.

Disney collects and catalogs unusual natural occurrences of Mickey that appear on everything from a cow to a potato. In fact, there are far more documented instances of Mickey images than of The Virgin Mary. Maybe we ought to look into this Mickey thing.

Maybe we’re missing God’s real message.

The American Citizens Message to The Pope: Shut the Fuck Up.

Pope tells Nancy Pelosi life must be protected

VATICAN CITY – Pope Benedict XVI received Nancy Pelosi, one of the most prominent abortion rights politicians in America, and told her Wednesday that Catholic politicians have a duty to protect life “at all stages of its development.” The U.S. House speaker, a Catholic, was the first top Democrat to meet with Benedict since the election of Barack Obama, who won a majority of the U.S. Catholic vote despite differences with the Vatican on abortion.

Here is the link for the rest of the article.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090219/ap_on_re_eu/eu_vatican_us_pelosi

Let me see if I understand this. The leader of the Catholic Church tells one of the most prominent political leaders in the United States, “politicians have a duty to protect life “at all stages of its development” an obvious anti abortion, or in politically correct speak, ”pro life” statement.

I don’t know where this pro life/pro choice language came from. My guess is that people favoring abortion try to soft sell and put a positive spin on killing babies by calling it pro choice, like choosing your favorite color or your favorite pizza, except you are choosing to kill your baby. Hey we can’t let such a major inconvenience like a baby interfere with your social schedule and your penchant for random, casual unprotected sex.

Back to the Pope/Pelosi bullshit.

The article states “Still, a number of bishops in the United States have questioned Pelosi’s stance on abortion, particularly her theological defense of her support for abortion rights.” Pelosi is pro abortion. She disagrees with the Pope on this issue and is not likely to change her mind.

The real issue here is the Popes statements that “Catholic politicians have a duty to protect life”.

Sorry, asshole.  American politicians have a sworn duty to do the biding of their constituents, not the fucking Pope. This flies in the face of the Constitutional principle of separation of church and state. Religion has long been trying to poke holes in this principle in order to gain some control over the United States government.

For example this gem from the late king of religious assholes, Jerry Falwell: “The idea that religion and politics don’t mix was invented by the Devil to keep Christians from running their own country.”– Rev Jerry Falwell, Sermon, July 4, 1976.

So, Jerry, which “Christians” are you talking about? Catholics. Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses? Of course not. The Christians to which Jerry refers to are his brand of Christians. He has publically berated all the above religions. He also said this:

“Billy Graham is the chief servant of Satan.” It’s no secret that Falwell and Billy did not see eye to eye. So to Falwell, Christians are his brand of Christian, which seems pretty narrow. But the real scary quote is this :.”
– Rev Jerry Falwell, quoted Freethought Today, December, 1999, cited by Anthony T. Podestra of People for the American Way in, Dietz and Holden, Satiricon, p 44; quoted from Steve Benson “Latter-Day Saint To Latter-Day Ain’t”; commemorating the “Tell It Like It Is” Freethought In Media Award, presented on November 5, 1999, by the Freedom From Religion Foundation; excerpted by PAM.

What an asshole. I have a question Jerry, who died and put you in charge? Oh, yea, you said no questions. Ah, but who cares what you think because you don’t think as you are already dead. So by now the rest of you body has no doubt turned to shit like your brain when you were living.

So, referring to Falwell’s quote about “no questions”, what exactly does that mean? It means if Falwell is leading you, you better not question him. Falwell is dead, but there are many more fanatical Christian fuck heads who would love to have as much influence on the United States Government as possible and think like falwell.

“Hey, shut up. Give me all your money. I’m going to fuck your wife..and your daughter…and your son….and your dog. You object??? Good Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions!!! You’re not a good Christian!!!”

The religious asshole parade continues. This asshole, Todd DuBord, senior pastor at Lake Almanor Community Church said this: “I used to believe in ‘a wall of separation between Church and State,’” DuBord wrote in a compilation of his research prepared for his website. “After researching the religion and politics of Thomas Jefferson in the Library of Congress, I now understand that barrier was a gate Jefferson would often pass through.”

The complete article is here:

http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=54349

DuBord is, of course full of shit. Jefferson, the politician, on several occasions used government support and funds for religious initiative. However, Jefferson was clearly a supporter of the separation of church and state. Giving religion a few Government Dollars didn’t mean Jefferson flipped on the separation issue. DuBord is a moron.

Back to the Pope’s statement, Pelosi’s visit and actions and statements from The Senator from Pennsylvania, Rick Santorum. Santorum is an unapologetic, vocal, active supporter of the Catholic Church and has stated many times that a person should be influenced by his religious beliefs, even politicians and they should vote accordingly.

Again, I say a politician serves his constituents not the Pope, Falwell, Billy Graham, Osama Bin Laden, or any other person or organization. Santorum should be impeached for violating his oath of office.

Why am I yammering on about this? Because religion needs to stay the hell out of the United States Government. Government is secular and needs to stay that way. Look what happened when the Catholics had their turn at influencing governments. They gave us the Crusades and several inquisitions as well as the normal every day oppression and exploitation of the populace.

What do you think Falwell DeBord or any of the other shit heads would do if they got the backing of the Government. The exact same shit.

Personally, I believe abortion is wrong, but as a practical matter, I don’t give a shit. In the past 30 years or so there have been over 40 million abortions performed in the United States alone. Think about that for a moment. People assume that abortions are performed only on lower income woman but in fact the practice is spread across the entire economic spectrum. They may not have economic status and means in common, but the one thing they do have in common is that all these kids were unwanted.

So, had they been born, what impact would 40 million angry, psychologically maladjusted people between the ages of 1 and 30 have on the economy and the social fabric of our society? Would these people be productive? Not likely. They would, as a group be an economic drain. Boy, that would play well in today’s economy. In fact the peasant economic problems would have happened 10 years ago. We’d still be in the shit today.

I don’t know about you but I wouldn’t want 40 million maladjusted psychopaths roaming the country side and lurking in our cities, mugging, murdering and stealing.

Think about this when you protest abortions, holding up signs of these cute little babies. Hitler was a cute little baby too.

Who knows? Maybe that girl you talked out of an abortion will actually have the kid, likely fail miserably as a parent and in 16 years or so the kid will rob your house and steal your big screen. Or better, yet break into the Vatican and steal the Pope’s fish hat. Who dresses that guy anyway? Did Jesus wear a hat like that? It does have a fish on it by the way. At least one of them does.

And by the way, the 16 year old mother that you, the Bible thumping busy body (as in mind your own fucking business) talked out of the abortion turned out not able to handle raising a kid. Now she is a drug dependant crack whore has six cranked out 3 or 4 more bundles of joy, all charter members of the FFA, Future Felons of America.

Religion fucks up everything it touches.

Fashion and Religion: Will it End in Bloodshed?

Police: Man stabs son for wearing hat in church

Tue Feb 24, 4:35 pm ET

BALTIMORE – Police said a 58-year-old man stabbed his teenage son after he refused to take off his hat at church earlier in the day. The father and his 19-year-old son got into an argument on Sunday afternoon. That’s when police said the father went to a car, got a knife and stabbed his son in the left buttock and fled.

The son was taken to University of Maryland Medical Center for treatment. The father’s name was withheld pending his arrest.

The Baltimore Sun, http://www.baltimoresun.com

Fashion related violence is becoming epidemic in our churches.

In one Florida town, a preacher assaulted a parishioner for wearing a pair of crotch less panties to a service. She sat in the front row and apparently the “show” was only meant for him, but his righteous sensibilities were so incensed, he threw his hymnal at her, while screaming “Be gone from this Holy place, Jezebel!!”

Unidentified sources close to the incident speaking in anonymity, said there was talk that the Pastor was already fucking the woman and reacted in this manner only after his wife, who was standing just off stage caught site of the display.

“I think the fact that it took him 45 minutes to notice should tell ya’ sumthin’” a Deacon was overheard saying.

We also have the report of two women going at each other in a Presbyterian Church in Philadelphia, after both showed up for Sunday services wearing the same dress.

“It was horrible” one bystander commented “but my money was on the blond with the big tits. Even though, it was sort of a draw, because the dumbass Assistant Pastor broke it up”

NEVER break up a girl fight!! What do they teach these idiots in Seminaries now days!! When two chicks are fighting they might…well….kiss. Would you want to miss that? Do I have to do all the thinking around here??

Religion and fashion are reaching critical mass, what with that Muslim guy throwing his shoes at President Bush. In the Muslim world that is a serious insult. I would much rather have someone throw his shoes at me than say his underwear. Strangely, there is a bit of logic here. Most of the Muslim world smells like shit anyway, so underwear to the face might not be noticed, as it is cloth and presumably soft. Although it would depend on how often it is changed (likely weekly) and if it perhaps has a stale stray turd in it. A petrified piece of shit could leave quite mark.

Anyway, I say to prevent any more fashion violence and ass stabbings, people should attend Church naked. I say if God had intended women to wear clothes they would not be born naked.

Anyway, it ain’t my problem, as I do not go to church. So, if you don’t like what some one wears, go ahead and stab them in the ass.

And Do NOT break up a chick fight!!!!!!!

Another Disillusioned Jehovah’s Witness Quits after Learning the Jo Ho’s Are Bullshit.

Below is a letter of resignation from a Jehovah’s Witness missionary. He says below “I am sharing my resignation letter with anyone who cares to read it.” so I am putting it up for all my readers. It is on the net at several other sites.

I also left the Jo Ho’s after 50 years and one of the many (way to numerous to list here) reasons was the 607BCE/1914 conundrum he mentions below.

Just to forewarn, any Jo Ho reading this will label it “apostate”, which is in effect to a Jo Ho, equal to the aids virus. Note also that he divorced his wife and left her “scripturally free to remarry” meaning he committed adultery, as to Jo Ho’s that is the only grounds for a divorce. Jo Ho’s will seize on this point, ignore the points he makes about the dates and in their own mind fell that he is a liar and a “tool of Satan” because he is a fornicator.

When one is excommunicated from the Jo Ho’s, or “disfellowshipped” which is Jo Ho speak, (it isn’t a real word), the leaders have to give the impression that you did something wrong. Announcing that one has been “disfellowshipped “ for “Disagreeing with the Watchtower” would raise far too many questions that the Elders can’t answer. In fact, the friends of the guy who wrote the letter below all think he left the Jo Ho’s because he was an adulterer.

As in my case I left the Jo Ho’s because I no longer bought their crap. It was only after, that I became a fornicator and a zealous one at that.

Here is my standard greeting to all Jo Ho’s: Fuck you, you deluded moronic asswipes.

Here is the letter:

I am sharing my resignation letter with anyone who cares to read it. I know some people had to read it, and I hope it did some good. Maybe it will do good for some readers here too. I don’t call my leaving “disassociation”, because that’s a JW term of convenience. I resigned my membership from this group, nothing more. They did the rest. Here is why I left, not even one year after graduating from Gilead…(Gilead is the Witness missionary training school)

To whom it may concern:

In early September, I came across a man in the ministry who was curious as to how Jehovah’s Witnesses got the date 1914. As I explained to him in basic terms, it started with the count of the gentile times, (2,520 years) from 607 BCE. He was intrigued by our calculations, but was puzzled as to why we say Jerusalem was destroyed in 607 BCE, when “everyone else” has it as 586/587 BCE. Confident that I would be able to prove the date of 607 BCE, I went about to research further this date and to use whatever secular sources existed to prove it. He wanted to see proof beyond what Jehovah’s Witnesses have published, so I therefore researched this thoroughly.

Imagine my surprise to find that while Jehovah’s Witnesses use certain ancient secular sources from Babylon and Persia to arrive at 539 BCE as the fall of Babylon , while at the same time dismiss these very same sources for EVERYTHING else related to the fall of Jerusalem . I couldn’t understand this, but resolved that the “faithful and discreet slave” would no doubt have gone to great lengths to make sure that such an important date as 607 BCE could be verified. I also continued my research.

I will not detail my findings, as I have since come to learn that the Governing Body has refused to look at such evidence or even acknowledge it. The Governing Body above all others knows the controversy of this date and of their own efforts at first to prove 1914 through historical references only to fail in that, then to squelch anyone who even suggested otherwise. At some point, it will be in the Governing Body’s best interests to address this. Suffice to say that I have seen abundant and real proof that both 607 BCE and the related date of 1914 is a date propped up by questionable use of bible scriptures, questionable theology, and white washed history relating to the “modern day history” of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

The use of the word “bible chronology” in the Watchtower and Insight on the Scriptures always was impressive to me. I now see that it is a misleading “bait and switch” phrase that is designed to stop a person from looking at real historical evidence. The use of one date as a pivotal date by Jehovah’s Witnesses, 539 BCE as the fall of Babylon is stretched and distorted. We discard the very same sources used to arrive at 539 BCE as the date of the destruction of Babylon and say they are inaccurate when it comes to the date of the destruction of Jerusalem!!!. Why? Because it doesn’t fit with a preconceived idea, that of 1914 as being significant. At best, 1914 will go down as a great coincidence between World War I starting, and what a few people who followed C T Russell were looking for. This is disingenuous, misleading, and unfair.
I am not disillusioned at all! I feel relief for the first time. My only strong feeling is that of disgust; that a few men who are themselves married to 1914 yet at the same time unsure of it, will use that “prophetic” teaching as a source of authority to appoint themselves as some kind of “faithful and discreet slave”, and then try to use this authority control the thinking and actions of so many in the name of god!!

Having gone to the Watchtower School of Gilead, I could never get over the fact that almost everything in the bible according to Jehovah’s Witnesses, “prophetically points” to the “faithful slave” and its governing body. You even go so far as to compare the administrations of Rutherford to the prophet Elijah and Knorr to Elisha!! How arrogant!! What an unbelievable stretch to say that the bible “prophesied” the existence of Rutherford and Knorr!! I use this as one of many examples used by the governing body to keep their power base “scriptural” in the eyes of those that follow and support this organization! I am only disappointed in myself that I didn’t scream out loud at the time this was being “taught”. This is how one must study the bible to get close to God and Christ??? Absolutely not!! Yet you clearly go beyond what is written in the bible itself, saying that to be disobedient to the governing body is the same as being disobedient to Jehovah himself, though the governing body neither admits to being inspired or perfect. What a double standard!

It wasn’t a year ago that I almost died in service to “Jehovah” while in Cameroon as a missionary. Now, I see that my service was to nothing more than a group of misguided men. I was even considering taking up a difficult and economically questionable move to help out a congregation our circuit overseer said was in need! I have done all that I have done for Jehovah’s Witnesses with real zeal, belief, and sincerity of heart. I willingly and happily sacrificed much. But now, I have learned that this is just another crazy group using the bible to fit their own agenda.

I therefore find it necessary as of the date of this letter, to officially resign as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Because of personal issues, I am also divorcing my wife, ——-. For her benefit, I will provide her with the evidence allowing her to remarry as a Jehovah’s Witness if that is her wish, when in fact, I have such evidence honestly to give.

My only regret is knowing that I will be leaving behind hundreds of friends that I have come to love very much. I realize how I will hence be treated. While I must accept this for the time being, it is my hope that all whom I have ever loved in this organization are or will be happy one day, although I have come to learn that such happiness will likely not result from their association with Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Diners report seeing Virgin Mary in food griddle

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/odd_griddle_virgin_mary

This article was sent to be by Leo, an alert reader of this blog. Thanks, Leo!

 Thu Apr 30, 9:14 pm ET

CALEXICO, Calif. – The hottest thing on the griddle at the Las Palmas restaurant these days isn’t the food — it’s the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe that a cook says she saw on the griddle.

Restaurant manager Brenda Martinez says more than 100 people have flocked to the small town of Calexico on the California-Mexico border to gaze at the likeness of the Virgin Mary since it was discovered as the griddle was being cleaned.

Among the awe-struck was a group of masked Mexican wrestlers who arrived Thursday for an exhibition at a nearby swap meet.

One, known as Mr. Tempest, says: “This is amazing. It’s a true miracle.”

Since the discovery, the griddle has been taken out of service and placed in a shrine in a storage room.

——————————————————

I bet they’re charging a good bit to anyone who wants a look. And I am sure they’re making some serious jack.

I have a previous post here called “Faith and Mickey Mouse”. I talk about how people go crazy over the likeness of the Virgin Mary on windows in Florida and cement walls in Chicago. If likenesses appearing in nature are significant, than perhaps God is sending us the message that Mickey Mouse is of cosmic importance. Disney actually invites people who have things that look like Mickey Mouse to send photos or the original article to them. They have thousands of photos, potato chips, tomatoes, etc. that resemble Mickey.

In fact, there was a cow born with a huge Mickey on her side. They had her on display at Disney World in Florida. I have seen her several times.

In all seriousness, what does the reactions of people, when hearing of the likeness of the Virgin Mary appearing on a griddle, window or cement wall tell us? People grasp at straws for proof of their faith. Religion needs faith because it has no facts. To quote Sam Harris, the noted atheist “Religious faith requires people to believe in things they could not possibly know”.

Normally, I would ridicule the moronic assumption, by the crazed faithful, who revere a stain on a window, griddle and/or cement wall as some proof or sign from God, the Virgin Mary or whatever deity. But in this case the actions by these brain dead, deluded, moronic religious assholes may in fact elicit empathy from this otherwise foul mouthed critique of all things religious.

 By the way, the Bible says Mary had other kids the old fashioned way, after Jesus, so her cherry is waaay popped. But, believe what you want.

Stop and think. These people are hungering for some tangible proof of their faith, because they have none. Not one shred of evidence to prove any of the bullshit the Catholics cram down their throats. It’s not just the Catholics in any religion based on any of the numerous bullshit Holy Books.

People want real, tangible proof. Do ya’ think God knows that? So, where is he? Just one appearance from him and it would solve a lot of the world’s problems. I haven’t seen him. I have concluded that there is a God/Intelligent/whatever, but I do not presume to have any exclusive communications with him/her/it and/or them. I have come to this conclusion simply by observing nature and the universe. To me, it’s reasonable.

But, mankind seems to be adrift in a cosmic sea of vast uncertainty, populated by millions of people and organizations claiming that they have the only exclusive path to him.

“Well, you just have to read the Bible. He’ll make himself known to you”. Oh yea, well fuck you in the ass. I’ve read the Bible, likely far more than most people. Nothing jumped out at me. There is no proof the Bible is from God or that Jesus Christ was a real person, so blow me.

The Bible has as many interpretations as readers. There are different interpretations of all the “Holy Books” and not a shred of proof that any of them was divinely inspired.

The sad part is that poor, hapless suckers, yearning for some micron on proof for what they believe, grasping at straws, revere stains on griddles, cement walls and windows. Pathetic. But, you can bet your ass that Pancho and Cisco down at the Las Palmas restaurant are raking in the pesos.

The real question is what’s with the “masked Mexican wrestlers”? What’s under those masks? Are they really Mexican? Did they pay for their meal and not steal anything? That would be the real fucking miracle.

Jehovah’ Witnesses: All Dressed Up and No Where to Go.

It occurred to me some time ago that for once in their long, sordid history, fraught with false prophesies, loony assertions and strange and improvable assumptions, Jehovah’s Witnesses, at this specific time in their history don’t have a date. They are dateless, stood up and left at the curb, in their prom dress with the wilting corsage.

In the entire history of this eclectic and often derided Religious group, they have always had a “date”. They have always been looking forward, like the donkey follows the carrot on the stick, to Armageddon and it was always real close and going to come within specific, measurable time periods.

 “It’s just around the corner!”. Don’t waste your time in “worldly pursuits! Armageddon and God’s new world is soooo close”

Interestingly, at this particular snapshot in time, they do not have a date for Armageddon. Oh, it’s still close, it’s still “around the corner” but the Watchtower Society has not set any precise time period or “Drop dead date”, like they have in the past.

I was raised a Jo Ho, from birth. At age 18 I was reading this from the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

From the same Awake, page 15: “Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

I am 57, a grandfather, a college graduate, have started and sold several successful companies and am contemplating retirement. But, in 1969, “this corrupt system (was) due to end in a few years” and I had no time to “fulfill any career that this system offers”, surely the system would end before I was 30 or even 35.

Again, historically, Jo Ho’s have always had a date or a time period. For example, The Watchtower Society prophesied that Armageddon would come at 6 separate and distinct time periods and they were wrong.

1914 – “In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.” (The Time is at Hand, 1902 edition, p. 99) Note: this same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book.

End of WW1: “The present great war in Europe is the beginning of the Armageddon of the Scriptures (Revelation 19:16-20). It will eventuate in the complete overthrow of all the systems of error which have so long oppressed the people of God and deluded the world”. (Pastor Russell’s Sermons, 1915, p. 676) In the same year (1915),

1925 – “The period must end in 1925 . . . [This date] is definitely fixed in the Scriptures. Every thinking person can see that a great climax is at hand. The scriptures clearly indicate that the climax is the fall of Satan’s empire and the full establishment of the Messianic kingdom . . . Therefore, it can be confidently said at this time that millions now living will never die”. (Golden Age, January 4, 1922, p. 217)

1975 – Watchtower, October 15, 1969 pages 622 and 623:

“More recently earnest researchers of the Holy Bible have made a recheck of its chronology. According to their calculations the six millenniums of mankind’s life on earth would end in the mid-seventies…. Would not, then, the end of six millenniums of mankind’s laborious enslavement under Satan the Devil be the fitting time for Jehovah God to usher in a Sabbath millennium for all his human creatures? Yes, indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.”

Notice the use of the definite article “the”. It would be “the fitting time”, not “a fitting time” not “an appropriate time” but “THE FITTING TIME”, to the exclusion of all other times. “Yes, Indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath”. Not “might be”, not “could be”, but “WILL BE”.
, for sure now….”

End of the 20th Century – Again in 1971, they said it would come in the 20th century: ”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

Within the life span of the 1914 generation: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

I lived the 1975 thing, the before the end of the 20^th Century thing and the 1914 generation thing.

I was still a Witness in 1995 when the definition of the 1914 generation was changed. It was so subtle that, although I read every publication, I apparently missed that. And so did many Witnesses. When I have a conversation with a Witness, I will ask about the 1914 gen and the changed in 1995. (They also changed it again sometime in 2002 or so back to the original 1927 definition).  Most current Jo Ho’s have no idea what I am taking about. Either they are old enough to remember the original definition, shown above from the July, 1, 1969 Watchtower or they are too young to be aware of what it was and what it now is.

Here are the three incarnations of the definition of the 1914 generation.:

1-      Wt 2/15/27, page 62: The Anointed ones make up the generation

 

2-      Some time in the 1950’s it changed to this: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395: “People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

 

3-      WT 11/1/95, pg 19-20:  Therefore, in the final fulfillment of Jesus’ prophecy today, “this generation” apparently refers to the peoples of earth who see the sign of Christ’s presence but fail to mend their ways.

 

4-      2008, the 1914 generation  changed again, back to the 1927 teaching. WT 2/15/2008, page 24 “Anointed ones make up the generation”

 

So the definition of the 1914 gen went full circle and now it is not attached to anytime period, like the death of those of that generation.

The Jo Ho’s have no date.  They are dateless.

Without being raised in this frantic environment of “We’re running out of time”, “Armageddon is just around the corner”, I can’t imagine being a Jo Ho without a date.

But alas, they are dateless, adrift on a sea of reality, as their past dates did not happen and perhaps they are reticent to quote a new one.

However, I have faith in the Watchtower Society. I have complete faith that they will not be dateless for long. Look for a date that perhaps has something to do with Noah, 120 years and 1914. I am keeping up with the Jo Ho lit, even the Watchtowers they study and no longer distribute door to door.

Oh yea, they have two Watchtowers, one for Jo Ho’s and one for the public. I have access to it all and lately it looks like they are hinting at this Noah connection. I predict that they say that Armageddon will come before 2034, or 120 years from 1914.

“This is the new “Truth” from Jehovah, as all our previous predictions have been bullshit”

The Watchtower, 10/1/94, pg 8

“Even as Bible prophecy pointed forward to the Messiah, it also directs us to the close-knit body of anointed Christian Witnesses that now serve as the faithful and discreet slave. It helps us to understand the Word of God. All who want to understand the Bible should appreciate that the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.”

Hey, they were only wrong 100% in the 20^th Century. Let’s see what the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.” Has for us in the 21^st Century. More bullshit dates.

Religion Keeps Trying to Worm it’s Way into The United States Government

From an article entitled “The Bible bill?”, by Victoria McGrane – Fri May 22, 5:40 am ET

When the clock strikes midnight on Dec. 31, 2009, Rep. Paul Broun (R-Ga.) hopes you’ll be ringing in “the Year of the Bible.”

It’s probably just wishful thinking.

Broun’s simple congressional resolution aimed at honoring the Good Book has produced a push-back of biblical proportion in the blogosphere, with critics dismissing it as either unconstitutional or a waste of time. Jews in Congress and atheist activists are dismissing the resolution, while none of the many Democrats in Congress who are Christian have bothered to sign on as co-sponsors.

According to GovTrak.us, the resolution is among the most-blogged-about pieces of legislation, with most posts less than complimentary in nature.

“Does that mean 2009 is not the year of the Bible?” mocked Rep. Barney Frank ­(D-Mass.), who is Jewish. “What is 2012 the year of? The Quran?”

“That’s an endorsement of religion by the federal government, and we shouldn’t be doing that,” said Rep. Jerrold Nadler (D-N.Y.), even though he has introduced his own legislation dealing with religion.

“Republican lawmakers with apparently too much time on their hands and no solutions to offer the country are pushing a resolution that will not address the nation’s problems or advance prosperity or even untangle their previous governing mistakes,” blogged the Progressive Puppy.

Broun rejects the critiques leveled at this effort.

“This doesn’t have anything to do with Christianity,” he said in an interview with POLITICO. Rather, he says, it seeks to recognize that the Bible played an integral role in the building of the United States, including providing the basis for our freedom of religion that allows Muslims, Hindus and even atheists to vocalize their own beliefs.

You can read the entire article at this link:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/politico/20090522/pl_politico/22832

                    _____________________________________________________________

The incredible amount and varieties of horse shit, that keeps oozing from the multiple orifices of the United States Government, never ceases to amaze, disgust and amuse me.

The Year of The Bible, as decreed by the United States Congress. Hey, I only see a few problems with this issue. Separation of Church and State, for one and a whole host of other issues, violating other federal, state and local laws, not to mention common sense and courtesy.  

Broun, you dope. What a fucking bone head. There is so may things wrong with this, it is no wonder as the article says: “Broun’s simple congressional resolution aimed at honoring the Good Book has produced a push-back of biblical proportion in the blogosphere, with critics dismissing it as either unconstitutional or a waste of time.” It has little support among congress and the general public.

As a side bar look what Barney Fag…err..Frank has to say:

“Does that mean 2009 is not the year of the Bible?” mocked Rep. Barney Frank ­(D-Mass.), who is Jewish. “What is 2012 the year of? The Quran?”

Well to the fudge packing, cock sucking congressman from Mass-he-chews-tits, I would ask is 2004 the year of the “Faggot Congressmen Who Fucked the US Economy Up the Ass”? Barney gay boy and his band of brain dead democrat congressional fuck heads played a huge roll in the present fucked up economy by failing to oversee Fannie Mae and Freddie Mack?  Check it out, on video, in their own words:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxMInSfanqg

Sorry, but every time is see that asshole Frank, I have to throw up this video. However, in this case, Frank is correct. Thats one in a row, Barney. Hey that rymes with “Blow me!”

However, the equally brain dead asshole Broun asserts the following: ““This doesn’t have anything to do with Christianity,”. What????

The dope Broun continues, saying  that the Bible played an integral role in the building of the United States, including providing the basis for our freedom of religion that allows Muslims, Hindus and even atheists to vocalize their own beliefs, to which I say bullshit.

The Bible is totally intolerant of any other religion and does not leave any room for “religious freedom”.

Dueteronomy  Chapter 7, verse 3 + 4:

3:Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. 4: For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly.

The God of the Bible did not take kindly to people serving other Gods. In fact, He will “destroy thee suddenly”, for doing such a thing. There is a huge lesson in religious tolerance and freedom there. Like the God of the Bible doesn’t allow it and will seriously kill your sorry ass.

Anyone familiar with the Bible should know this without looking.

Here’s another gem, illustrating the God of the Bibles good nature toward other religions:

Exodus 34: 14 + 15:

“14 For thou shalt worship no other god: for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God: 15 Lest thou make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land, and they go a whoring after their gods, and do sacrifice unto their gods, and one call thee, and thou eat of his sacrifice”

“Jealous”. That’s a word that exudes religious tolerance.

“Hey, it’s OK if you tolerate other religions in your new country. I’m cool with that. I know, I know, The Bible calls me a jealous God, but it’s the 1700’s! Let’s get past all this religious intolerance. This new country will be really cool! Tell everyone the God has a new attitude!””

There are many other examples where the God of the Bible slaughters men, women and children simply because they are unbelievers and when it’s made clear that unbelievers will be killed or burned in hell eternally, depending on which one of the many diverse theologies people have extracted from the same book.

Broun, you brain dead asshole. The notion of a U S Government sponsored “Year of the Bible” is wrong on so many levels without you raising the religious tolerance issue. The Bible, Jesus and most Christian Religions are no more tolerant of other religions than the Muslims, Jews and Hindus.  In fact, Bible based religions are intolerant of each other to the point of bloodshed. Do the problems between the Catholics and Protestants in Northern Ireland ring a bell, you asshole?

Broun is a “Christian” and is trying to give his religion some influence over the U S Government. Tell it like it is. Don’t couch it in “religious tolerance” bullshit.

There are two real issues here, of any substance, the first being the separation of church and state issue. The second is asked by the author of the above article: What about the economy, health care, global warming and all the other issues on Congress’ plate?

Good question. As we suffer through the worst economic crises in decades, Broun dithers and wastes time on a “non issue”. Hey, Broun and all you other government fuck heads:  get to work and stop fucking around with this type of bullshit issue. Facing and working on real pressing issues apparently is too much work for Mr. Broun. Does it give you a headache Pauly?

“Man, all these spreadsheets, financial reports, projections, policy briefings, it’s all a big blur for this old country boy from Georgia. Some guy was palabering about the OMB. I don’t even know what that is but I think I can spell it. I’m hearing all this talk about  Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae and I haven’t even met these two guys yet, but I say haul ‘em in front of congress and give ‘em what fur!”

“But we need to honor the Good Book. Yea, that’ll make me a big dog back home”

Hey, Broun, good idea. Go back home. In fact, take Nancy Pelosi, Barney Frank, Maxine Waters and Harry Reid with you

Fucking Morons.

More Religious Horse Shit

From WorldNetDaily

http://wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=98895

FAITH UNDER FIRE
Home: No place for Bible study

County Demands Pastor Obtain $10,000 Permit to Host Friends

By Drew Zahn
© 2009  

A  San Diego pastor and his wife claim they were interrogated by a county official and warned they will face escalating fines if they continue to hold Bible studies in their home.

The couple, whose names are being withheld until a demand letter can be filed on their behalf, told their attorney a county government employee knocked on their door on Good Friday, asking a litany of questions about their Tuesday night Bible studies, which are attended by approximately 15 people.

“Do you have a regular weekly meeting in your home? Do you sing? Do you say ‘amen’?” the official reportedly asked. “Do you say, ‘Praise the Lord’?”

The pastor’s wife answered yes.

She says she was then told, however, that she must stop holding “religious assemblies” until she and her husband obtain a Major Use Permit from the county, a permit that often involves traffic and environmental studies, compliance with parking and sidewalk regulations and costs that top tens of thousands of dollars.

And if they fail to pay for the MUP, the county official reportedly warned, the couple will be charged escalating fines beginning at $100, then $200, $500, $1000, “and then it will get ugly.”

Remind the world who’s really in charge with the “Worship GOD, not GOV” magnetic bumper sticker from WND.

Dean Broyles of the Western Center for Law & Policy, which has been retained to represent the couple, told WND the county’s action not only violates religious land-use laws but also assaults both the First Amendment’s freedom of assembly and freedom of religion.

“The First Amendment, in part, reads, ‘Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof,’” Broyles said. “And that’s the key part: ‘prohibiting the free exercise.’ We believe this is a substantial government burden on the free exercise of religion.”

He continued, “If one’s home is one’s castle, certainly you would the think the free exercise of religion, of all places, could occur in the home.”

Broyles confirmed the county official followed through on his threat. The pastor and his wife received a written warning ordering the couple to “cease/stop religious assembly on parcel or obtain a major use permit.”

“The Western Center for Law and Policy is troubled by this draconian move to suppress home Bible studies,” said the law center in a statement. “If the current trends in our nation continue, churches may be forced underground. If that happens, believers will once again be forced to meet in homes. If homes are already closed by the government to assembly and worship, where then will Christians meet?”

On a personal note, Broyles added, “I’ve been leading Bible studies in my home for 13 years in San Diego County, and I personally believe that home fellowship Bible studies are the past and future of the church. … If you look at China, the church grew from home Bible studies. I’m deeply concerned that if in the U.S. we are not able to meet in our homes and freely practice our religion, then we may be worse off than China.”

Broyles also explained to WND that oppressive governments, such as communist China or Nazi Germany, worked to repress home fellowships, labeling them the “underground church” or “subversive groups,” legally compelling Christians to meet only in sanctioned, government-controlled “official” churches.

“Therein lies my concern,” Broyles said. “If people can’t practice their religious beliefs in the privacy of their own homes with a few of their friends, that’s an egregious First Amendment violation.”

WND contacted a spokeswoman for San Diego County, who acknowledged the description of the incident seemed “bizarre,” but who was unable to locate the details of the account. She simply could not provide comment yet, she said, until she could become familiar with the case.

Broyles said the WCLP is nearly ready to file a demand letter with the county to release the pastor and his wife from the requirement to obtain the expensive permit. If the county refuses, Broyles said, the WCLP will consider a lawsuit in federal court.

Broyles also told WND the pastor and his wife are continuing to hold the Bible study in their home.

_________________________________________________________________________________

 

What the hell does a Deist do with this?

Well as an American and a staunch supporter if the Constitution, if I support the separation of Church and State, than logically, I would support the Feeedom of Religion and I do.

I despise orgnized religion, however I would not want the Government to have the power to decide any matter that is clearly a personal choice. Don’t get me wrong. I would laugh my ass of if Religion was outlawed. But what comes next? All other aspects of personal freedom would be vulnerable to the Government meddeling. Free speech, freedom of expression, freedom to move where and when you chose, numerous peronal freedoms would be threatened. So, in a way, it’s a small sacrafice to let religons exist. Besides, without religion, what would be left for me to ridicule?

Another Deist, quite a bit more notable and eloquent than I, perhap the individual I admire most, Thomas Jefferson said it best:

“In every country and in every age, the priest has been hostile to liberty. He is always in alliance with the despot, abetting his abuses in return for protection to his own.”

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Horatio G. Spafford, March 17, 1814.

He is also alleged to have said, “It’s not Christianity I oppose, it’s the tyranny it brings its subjects” I am likely quoting this alleged quote incorrectly, but you get the idea. I know, it’s probably on the net, so look it up. Who says I have to do all the work?

But if you want to have friends over and study the Bible, Mad Magazine or The Writings of Chairman Mao, than you have every right.

However, there are a few issues and details about this story that should be pointed out.  First, “The World Net Daily” is not exactly unbiased. It is a very conservative, right wing and pro religious. As a side bar, I am a Republican, a Conservative and not religious. I really am fed up with the fuck head religious right trying to control the party.

But if you read the article carefully, you begin to see the problem, the article says:

“She(the wife of the Pastor in question)  says she was then told, however, that she must stop holding “religious assemblies” until she and her husband obtain a Major Use Permit from the county, a permit that often involves traffic and environmental studies, compliance with parking and sidewalk regulations and costs that top tens of thousands of dollars. “

Say, for example a couple decides to have such a Bible study in their home. Say it’s the couple and ten friends. If this was my neighborhood, it would cause a parking problem, because on my street there really is no street parking and my driveway is small. 5, 7 or so cars, every Tuesday would cause a problem with both me and the neighbors.

The article does not say how many persons attended this Bible study, what the parking issues were or what ordinances applied. How would you like it if, every Tuesday when The Mentalist is on, (I love that show) 59 people, after clogging up you street with cars, all started singing “Bringing in the Sheaves”?  So, while the on street parking is causing a potential problem for perhaps the Paramedics reaching your house and hoard of religious bone heads are messing with your favorite show.

Do they use a PA System? Boy, that would piss me off. Like I need to hear some religious dope blathering about the Bible or Jesus, shouting Amen or Praise the Lord, while I am I my fat boy recliner watching TV with a cold Corona. What if this bonehead Pastor is trying to start a church on the cheap?

Now that’s just plain bullshit, but that is most likely the actual scenario. Religious assholes are probably not having this little, innocent, quiet Bible Study. I bet they’re breaking the law and deliberately causing some sort of public nuisance, which has brought them attention from the authorities. The World Net Daily, I would suspect, is bending the facts, trying to turn this into some type of crap they are throwing at liberals.  This is just the sort of things that Conservatives blame on the Liberal press.  Click on the link in the article where it says, Remind the world who’s really in charge with the “Worship GOD, not GOV” magnetic bumper sticker from WND.

Another quote from the article states:  “Do you have a regular weekly meeting in your home? Do you sing? Do you say ‘amen’?” the official reportedly asked. “Do you say, ‘Praise the Lord’?”

I smell embellishment. The only thing here that seems legit is that they asked if they sing, the sound/nuisance issue. As for “do you say amen?” I think Mrs. Unnamed Pastor and/or The World Net Daily, is seriously full of shit on that one. I don’t think either is above stretching the fats.  I mean, really, would a government official ask these questions and expect to get away with it? Not likely.

About a year ago, the lady next door had a party, of sorts, Tupperware, whatever. About 25 women attended, including my wife. There were cars all over the place and they were noisy.

If this happened every Tuesday I would be pissed.

So, “The Government” persecuting Christians or is the Pastors Wife and/or The World Net Daily distorting the real situation? Either one is bullshit.

Believe what you want, meet with your friends and discuss/read/study what you want, as long as it does not interfere with the rights of other.  I swear, if any of you anyone fucks up my TV time by singing religious hymns, folk songs or Def Leopard, I would call the Cops in a New York minute, if I didn’t flatten all your tires and set fire to your house first.

And to the World Net Daily, shut your fact twisting, religiously biased cyber pie hole.

It’s Chicken Little Season in the Jehovah’s Witness World.

From the “Rochester Democrat and Chronicle”

“Jehovah’s Witnesses prepare for the end”

Bennett J. Loudon • Staff writer • July 5, 2009

Thousands of people are expected to attend the last day of a three-day religious convention in downtown Rochester, where the program today will focus on how to survive what organizers believe is the approaching end of the world.

Keep the Watch is the theme of the Jehovah’s Witnesses convention at the Blue Cross Arena at the Community War Memorial that is focused on recognizing signs of the end time and preparing for it, organizers said.

Jeffrey Case, a spokesman for the Jehovah’s Witnesses, said the wars, rampant crime and massive hunger occurring worldwide are all signs of the apocalypse predicted in the Bible.

“Those are all things that we see in the news all the time,” Case said.

This morning, there will be a presentation on how to survive the end of the world by living according to the Bible. In the afternoon, an hourlong live dramatic presentation based on the parable of the prodigal son will be featured. That performance is intended especially for youths who may have strayed from the organization, Case said.

About 4,500 people from central New York and northern Pennsylvania were expected to attend each day of the three-day convention. Another three-day convention in about two weeks is expected to attract an equal number of people from the Rochester area. And a third convention at the arena in about three weeks will serve just as many people from Buffalo and western New York, Case said.

All the conventions are free and open to the public.

“Once a year we look forward to the new information, the latest information on Bible understanding,” said Elijah Nelson, 55, of Syracuse, who attended the convention with his wife, Rebecca Nelson, 48.

“One of the things that Jehovah’s Witnesses are known for is the love among them, and a district convention where you get to see 5,000 brothers and sisters is such a treat,” he said.

BLOUDON@DemocratandChronicle.com

     ___________________________________________________________________________________

Yes, it’s that time of year again, Jo Ho District Assembly time. Where those beloved doom and gloomers decend upon select unfortunate cities by the thousands and attend what seem to be endless sessions of Bible lectures which have one main theme: God will destroy the world any day now, If you ain’t one of us, you’re dead and we can’t wait to see an angel severe your worthless head.

The Assemblies of late are different from the many I attended during my 50 years as a Jo Ho. As I had mentioned in  a previous post, the Jo Ho’s are presently dateless. By that I mean they are not presently calling for a date for Armageddon. You know, the Big “A”, when the loving, kind, merciful God they worship slaughters, in a most horrible way, all non Jehovah’s Witnesses.

When I was a Jo Ho,we always had a date or a time period in which this would happen. I couldn’t wait for Jehovah to kill all you non believing, devil worshiping hoardes of unwashed religious masses who didn’t know what we knew. We had the truth, you don’t have shit. Ha Ha, Satans got you fooled!! You deserve to die and have the birds pick the eyes out of your rotting corpse. That’ll teach you to slam the door in the faces of God’s chosen people. Here’s what Jehovah has in store for you:

From Watchtower 2/1/85, page 3-4:

“So devastating will Armageddon be that the carnage is referred to as a reaping of “the harvest of the earth” by means of a sharp sickle. “And the angel thrust his sickle into the earth and gathered the vine of the earth, and he hurled it into the great winepress of the anger of God. And the winepress was trodden outside the city, and blood came out of the winepress as high up as the bridles of the horses, for a distance of a thousand six hundred furlongs.”—Revelation 14:15-20.”

“Yes, blood will run deep under the hand of God’s executional forces. The 69 million deaths of two world wars will pale in comparison to those slain in God’s war of Armageddon. Concerning them the prophet Jeremiah wrote: “Those slain by Jehovah will certainly come to be in that day from one end of the earth clear to the other end of the earth. They will not be bewailed, neither will they be gathered up or be buried. As manure on the surface of the ground they will become.”—Jeremiah 25:30-33.

The burning missiles, fiery showers, and other cataclysmic forces that accompany God’s judgment will strike terror into the hearts of mankind earth wide. In confusion they will turn, each one against his neighbor, as God’s executional forces strike without regard to age or sex. For God instructs them to show no mercy: “Strike. Let not your eye feel sorry, and do not feel any compassion. Old man, young man and virgin and little child and women you should kill off—to a ruination.”—Ezekiel 9:5, 6; Zechariah 14:12, 13.”

Remember, in the entire history of this loony fringe group of deluded morons, they always had a date. But although presently “dateless” the Jo Ho’s are still jumping around like so many hyper French poodles, pissing themselves in anticipation of you getting slaughtered by God during the coming global carnage, because as the Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19 says:

 ”ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.”

Yes sir, the unbelieveing pieces of shit that the rest of us are, are basically fucked.

As I mentioned, the Jo Ho’s always had a date. The Watchtower Society prophesied that Armageddon would come at 6 separate and distinct time periods and they were wrong.

1914 – “In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.” (The Time is at Hand, 1902 edition, p. 99) Note: this same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book.

End of WW1: “The present great war in Europe is the beginning of the Armageddon of the Scriptures (Revelation 19:16-20). It will eventuate in the complete overthrow of all the systems of error which have so long oppressed the people of God and deluded the world”. (Pastor Russell’s Sermons, 1915, p. 676) In the same year (1915),

1925 – “The period must end in 1925 . . . [This date] is definitely fixed in the Scriptures. Every thinking person can see that a great climax is at hand. The scriptures clearly indicate that the climax is the fall of Satan’s empire and the full establishment of the Messianic kingdom . . . Therefore, it can be confidently said at this time that millions now living will never die”. (Golden Age, January 4, 1922, p. 217)

1975 – Watchtower, October 15, 1969 pages 622 and 623:

“More recently earnest researchers of the Holy Bible have made a recheck of its chronology. According to their calculations the six millenniums of mankind’s life on earth would end in the mid-seventies…. Would not, then, the end of six millenniums of mankind’s laborious enslavement under Satan the Devil be the fitting time for Jehovah God to usher in a Sabbath millennium for all his human creatures? Yes, indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.”

Notice the use of the definite article “the”. It would be “the fitting time”, not “a fitting time” not “an appropriate time” but “THE FITTING TIME”, to the exclusion of all other times. “Yes, Indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath”. Not “might be”, not “could be”, but “WILL BE”.

End of the 20th Century – Again in 1971, they said it would come in the 20th century: ”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

Within the life span of the 1914 generation: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

None of the above happened and they changed the 1914 thing.

I was reading stuff like this at age 23, From “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

What, you sold your house. quit your job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?

I mean, it was always “around the corner”, “very close”, imminent. Except it never happened.

The point is made in the above article by Jeffrey Case, a spokesman for the Jehovah’s Witnesses. He  said the wars, rampant crime and massive hunger occurring worldwide are all signs of the apocalypse predicted in the Bible.

“Those are all things that we see in the news all the time,” Case said.

I got news for you and your loony cohorts Jeff, these are things that have happened since the beginning of man and will continue to happen. Oh, yea the Bible says that scoffers will say that these things have always occurred and will continue to occur. The kicker is, that’s true.

What a great point to build a religion around. The world is full of violence. No shit. And then your “Holy Book” conveniently says that scoffers will point out that the world has been this way since the beginning of man, thus giving credence to your claim that this violence and wickedness, which has always occurred is proof that the “end is near”.

The only problem for Jo Ho’s is that it never seems to come. They’ve been wrong so many, times they dare not utter another prediction. They are presently, “dateless”. And, by the way, their membership retention is dwindling. Without a date, it’s hard to create that sense of urgency. Without the urgency hook, it becomes harder and harder for people to keep believing your bullshit.

There is one thing for the Jo Ho’s to look forward to. There is likely to be some sort of World catastrophe i.e., nuclear, famine, disease, world war. It’s pretty easy to see that possibility.

However, I doubt seriously that “ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.” Regardless of in what form the “end of this doomed system”.

I see vultures picking the eyes out of dead Jo Ho’s. I can’t wait.

The Religious Bullshit Continues

Anti-Islam Sign On Display Outside Fla. Church

Posted: 7:22 am EDT July 9, 2009Updated: 12:02 pm EDT July 9, 2009

GAINSEVILLE, Fla. — A Gainesville Florida church has a shocking anti-Islam sign on its front lawn and says it is going to put up more.

 The sign at the Dove World Outreach Center reads “Islam of the devil.”

 ”We just use Islam because, at this time, they are making great in-roads into America and they’re trying to present themselves as a religion of peace,” said Dr. Terry Jones, Dove World Outreach Center.

Sixteen-year-old Gaby Alim, who is lives in the area, is Muslim. She says she feels hurt by the statement, but more so wants to know why the Dove World Outreach Center posted it.

“I think it’s all stereotypical about the whole Iraq war. People think all Muslims are like that and we’re not,” said 16-year-old Gaby Alim, Muslim resident.

 University of Florida Professor David Hackett says that people become very emotional when it comes to religion. “There are tendencies through all religions to think that theirs is the right one and the other ones are wrong,” he said.

 The city’s code enforcement has been out to look at the sign and say the case is under investigation. According to the municipal ordinance 30-317, temporary signs with no commercial message are permitted.

 Someone tried to spray paint over the sign, but the church quickly fixed it. For now, the sign stays and Dr. Jones says they plan to add more.

________________________________________________________________________________

 Where to begin?

 How about this genius quote:

 “University of Florida Professor David Hackett says that people become very emotional when it comes to religion.”There are tendencies through all religions to think that theirs is the right one and the other ones are wrong,” he said.”

No shit, Sherlock. Wow what a revelation! Religions are intolerant, incite emotion and think all other religions are wrong!! Say it ain’t so.

What’s with that statement from Captain Obvious, the revealer of astounding facts, Professor David Hackett?  What a great observation from the esteemed professor. Duh. Do we actually pay this guy to teach our kids?

Guess what else, Prof. The sky is blue, water is wet and you’re an idiot.

As for the sign, what do you expect from religious assholes? Do you see any great hue and cry from the Christian community in general? Except for the token bullshit from the random Christian, not a whole lot. Again, what do you expect?

There are moderates and radicals in all religions. The moderates who, may express verbally some wimper of objection to this sort of thing, really empower the radicals. How so? Because we all know that virtually all Christians think Islam is of the Devil.

Islam thinks Christianity is of the Devil. Hindus think Islam is of the Devil. Islam thinks every non Muslim is of the Devil. Religions think Atheists are of the Devil.

But the question for Christians is what is the Devil “of” or from? Didn’t the God of the Bible create the Devil? So, logically the Devil is from God.

“Oh. No. God may have created him, but He went bad. He was a good angel and now he is a bad angel”

In what universe does that notion make any sense? The Christian God created the Devil and now everything bad is from the devil? What is the hell is the purpose and meaning of all this? What is the purpose of this whole exercise? Why does it not make any sense? Do any hot chicks go to the Dove World Outreach Center? These questions demand answers!

Is Islam from the Devil? Hell if I know. They are some crazy ass dudes, but from the Devil? Who knows?

Do you think Dr. Terry Jones, Dove World Outreach Center, super Christian asshole, ever gives any thought to who created the Devil?

Hey asshole, your Bible says your God created the Devil.

You could go crazy with this religious shit. I mean you could get crazy enough to put up shit head signs, kill abortion doctor, become a suicide bomber.

Ya’ think? How come Professor Obvious, David Hackett didn’t pontificate on that?  Hey Dave, here’s an idea for your next informative lecture: “Religion makes people act crazy! ”

Charlie Brown Says It All.

Sorry, Guys. I can only take bullshit from Jehovah’s Witnesses for so long.

oh God...the Watchtower...door knocking...going to boring meetings...

Meet the ‘Naked Angels’ of Zhombe. Really, this is some crazy ass stuff.

From an Article from the Zimbabwe Gaurdian, by Isdore Guvamombe

 Sun, 19 Jul 2009 10:57:00 +0000

http://www.talkzimbabwe.com/news/117/ARTICLE/5094/2009-07-19.html

THEY grew up like ordinary village girls in a respectable and morally-upright family, with aspirations to achieve the best in life.

Their father’s job as a school headmaster married to a devout Christian helped mould the young girls into the envy of the village.

For them, the sky was the limit.Like other children blessed with intelligence, the girls proceeded to Advanced Level and completed courses in nursing and business administration thereafter, a feat a few girls of their time could only dream of.

But today, the twins have fallen from grace. They are now causing sleepless nights for their parents, community and have set tongues wagging nationwide.

Now in their mid-40s, the heavily built women arepacing  up and down the village, donning nothing but their undergarments before youths the same age as their own children and elders, including their 81-year-old father and mother (77).

They call themselves “angels” and at times behave like King David and King Solomon reincarnated.

Imagine full-grown women pacing up and down your home clad in only panties and you are their father, mother, sister, brother or, worse still, one of them is your mother?

It is bizarre, taboo and unthinkable, but fanatic religious female twins Patience and Memory Ncube of Zhombe communal lands have left the nation shell-shocked by walking around their home clad in panties, claiming religious purity from a cult seeking to relive the biblical Garden of Eden.

For the past three months, day in day out, the twins have been wandering around their parents’ home, semi-naked and have been working like Trojan horses, planting trees, cultivating a garden and cleaning up every corner to turn their home into their dreamland — a modern-day Garden of Eden.

The 45-year-old twins deserted their spouses, children and employment after a “calling to serve God” and are now members of a cult that split from the Seventh-Day Adventist Church in 2004, calling itself the Davidic Kingdom of Heaven.

They say they are now waiting for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ, who should find them in the “right place”.

Since the cult encourages cleanliness and hard work, the twins sleep at most three hours every night, spending the rest of the time working in their garden, fetching water and cleaning the yard, intermittently singing melodiously and dancing into their dreamland of Eden.

As they perform their various domestic chores, the twin sisters also carry bags of sand and stone and five-litre containers filled with soil to “demonstrate their strength and resilience, as it is considered mandatory by our church”.

Not surprisingly, their shoulders are now heavily scarred from carrying the heavy loads.

Patience and Memory are not ordinary village women; they are professionals who sacrificed their jobs to serve God. Born to headmaster Mr Regis Ncube and his wife Aidah, the twins attended Regina Mundi Secondary School in Gweru up to A-Level.

Patience is a State registered nurse who left Zimbabwe in the late 1990s to further her studies in the United Kingdom, but returned home in 2004 after the “calling” to serve God.

She was married to one Crispen Hama with whom she had three children who are now in primary school in Kwekwe.

Memory holds a Diploma in Business Administration and worked for Bulawayo City Council as an administrative clerk before resigning “after the calling”. She never married but has a school-going child.

The twins’ siblings — two brothers and five sisters — are currently living in the UK.

“We are strictly following heavenly scriptures and have nothing to do with earthly things. We have no surnames because in the Bible everyone was called by his or her first name. This is a serious calling to the work of God. We live like Adam and Eve did. Any man who feels lust for us because of our semi-nakedness is evil. We seek holiness. Our father and mother have accepted us as we are and we are very normal people. When Jesus comes, some of you will be found on the wrong side,” said Patience.

Asked about their semi-nakedness, they quoted the Bible to stress that the world will revert to the Old Testament when Jesus eventually comes.

______________________________________________________________________________________

The article goes on about some other Bible bullshit, the father getting excommunicated from some piece of shit Church, blah, blah, blah.

I find this article interesting because it shows Bible support for female nudity, which I wholeheartedly support…with some reservations. For example have you ever been to a “nude beach”? You’re thinking, play boy bunnies playing volleyball naked, right?

The reality is that, when you get there you come to the sudden and inescapable conclusion that you, in fact do not want to see 98% of the population naked. There was a 50 plus year old fat guy, covered with grey hair, who’s pot belly was so big, I‘m sure he hadn’t seen his dick in 20 years. Well, we saw it and the sight of him naked has replaced Viet Nam in my nightmares. There was this guy who was 400 pounds and lost 225. So, now weighing 175 someone asked how it felt.

He said “There is a good and bad thing about loosing all this weight. The good thing is I can see my dick. The bad thing is I can see my dick. 

There was this skinny women, at least 60, who’s tits were so elongated, she could sling them over her shoulder.

There were assorted other shapes, sizes and distorted other naked human bodies which I personally could have lived my entire life without seeing. There was maybe one or two do-able chicks and the hottest one had her bottoms on. She had a decent rack, but the trip to the nude beach was basically a disappointment. We left when the 60 year old flapper was coming toward us with this grin, no doubt anticipating seeing three college kids getting naked. Hate to disappoint you, flappy, we were out of there.

Well, these two chicks fit the 98% rule. Check it out:

 

 

Personally, I like black chicks. Say Beyonce ain’t smokin’!! But these two are simply butt ass ugly. Their names are Patience and Memory, which goes to show you stripper names are the same the world over.

But apparently naked chicks are OK with God and Jesus. Hey, if women were naked in church, I’d even start going.

All seriousness aside, this is more proof of crazy ass religious bullshit. What would you call it!

“Oh, my church/religion doesn’t teach this!!” No, instead yours teaches that a virgin had a baby, God is three people in one, God walked the earth and raise the dead and let men kill him in a most painful way, somehow proving his love for us.

“Hey, look at me! I’m stabbing myself in the eye with a pencil! Don’t ya’ see! I love you guys!

“No more beer for you dude. Yea we see ya’. You can get down from the cross now. Hey, anybody knows where this guy lives?”

“But the son of man has no where to lay his head”. Great. A drunk homesless guy.

Or if you blow yourself up, killing innocent people, you go the heaven and God gives you 70 virgins to fuck at your pleasure. If there was a shread of proof of that, I would blow my ass up,  like right now. However, the whole thing lacks at least my minimun standard for creability. Besides, you have to wonder what in the world those many sets of 70 virgins did to deserve spending eternity fucking some flea bitten grease ball. Their offense was obviously not sexual. Maybe they are all axe murderers. That would be interesting and fitting.

But the naked black chicks are bizarre and “wrong because your church doesn’t teach it!”

Well, fuck you. I guess we all have to adhere to your bizarre beliefs. Do us all a favor and strap a bomb to your sorry ass.

Sex, Marriage and God’s Paradox

From an Associated Press article:

Wait for sex … and marriage? Evangelicals dubious of abstinence promote marrying earlier

 

By ERIC GORSKI
AP Religion Writer

 

When Margie and Stephen Zumbrun were battling the urge to have premarital sex, a pastor counseled them to control themselves. The couple signed a purity covenant.

Then, when the two got engaged and Margie went wedding dress shopping, a salesperson called her “the bride who looks like she’s 12.” Nonchurch friends said that, at 22, she was rushing things.

The agonizing message to a young Christian couple in love: Sex can wait, but so can marriage.

“It’s unreasonable to say, ‘Don’t do anything … and wait until you have degrees and you’re in your 30s to get married,’” said Margie Zumbrun, who did wait for sex, and married Stephen fresh out of Purdue University. “I think that’s just inviting people to have sex and feel like they’re bad people for doing it.”

Against that backdrop, a number of evangelicals are promoting marrying earlier, nudging young adults toward the altar even as many of their peers and parents are holding them back.

Couples like the Zumbruns are caught between two powerful forces – evangelical Christianity’s abstinence culture, with its chastity balls and virginity pledges, and societal forces pushing average marriage ages deeper into the 20s.

—

The median age for first marriages in the U.S. is about 26 for women and 28 for men, the highest figures since the Census Bureau began counting. Solid data on evangelicals is not readily available, but research suggests they marry only slightly younger, Regnerus said.

—

Among evangelicals, there’s a tendency to wait because many believe God “is going to deliver me a spouse right to my door,” so they don’t actively seek one, said Glenn Stanton, director of family formation studies for the evangelical ministry Focus on the Family, a young marriage promoter.

Then there’s what Stanton calls the “eHarmony philosophy” – the belief God will deliver someone perfect.

Stanton doesn’t blame the abstinence movement. “I don’t think that it’s so much to much focus on abstinence, but the silence on marriage makes the abstinence message sound so much louder,” he said.

At Capitol Hill Baptist Church in Washington, D.C., associate pastor Michael Lawrence emphasizes that marriage is a covenant, not a convenient arrangement, and offers advice to young couples on overcoming arguments over money, sex and family.

“We probably haven’t served our young people well by on the one hand emphasizing abstinence, but on the other hand telling them to wait to get married,” Lawrence said. “It seems to be setting them up to fail.”

The above are some quotes from the article, but you get the general idea. You can read the entire article here:

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_REL_MARRYING_YOUNG?SITE=KTVB&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT

 

 

I personally think that sex is not to be treated lightly.

“Oh, look! A non- religious person with “morals”! How can that be, without “God” to guide him” or my favorite: “God is at work in you! You have morals and you don’t realize that God put them in your heart”

Well, in a figurative sense, fuck you. I swear, but that doesn’t mean I take sex lightly. I don’t. You can’t get much more intimate with a person than having sex. That’s about as far as you can go. My problem is that I don’t feel that sex should be casual and I do feel that it should be accompanied by love.

This has not always been my policy and as a young man, I had many sexual exploits. But after the hormone explosion that is the teenagers/young adult’s gift or curse, I have realized that I respect woman and myself and I don’t take sex lightly. Casual, meaningless sex actually disgusts me. The way sex is treated in the entertainment media is disgraceful, IMHO.

But, let’s be realistic. Having been raised a Jehovah’s Witness, I was subject to the “no sex before marriage” rule. In my teens, I had not planned to remain a Jo Ho when I left the house. So, I led the proverbial Jo Ho “double life”. Sex, drugs, (just weed and the occasional hash hit) and rock and roll when out of my parents sight, quickly reverting to my alter ego, the “goodie two shoes” Jo Ho when necessary.

Something happened to me around age 19. I suddenly decided to stay a Jo Ho and I indeed changed my ways and became a devoted Jo Ho, even being appointed a Ministerial Servant (Deacon) at 20. Well, I was one horny little Jo Ho. No sex before marriage drives young Jo Ho’s and other fundamentalist Christians to early marriage. It wasn’t  long before I was married. She was 18.

I knew it was a fucking disaster from Day Two. We had spent our wedding night fucking our brains out and it was about a 5 to 6 hour drive to where we were going to spend our Honeymoon. It was about noon, during that drive, when I thought to myself, “What the fuck have you done???”

Now, our marriage proved to be less than perfect. In fact, it was less than OK. Alright, it sucked. But, she was and still is a very nice person. I know a lot of nice women I would not want to be married to. Still, because of family and religious pressure I stayed married to her and actually had kids.

Why did I marry her? I was horny and she had nice tits. That’s about it. The point here is that I have seen and continue to see Jo Ho children, as young as 16 getting married. Three things happen:

1 – They live happily ever after. Not usually.

2 – They live un-happily ever after.  This is what usually happens to Jo Ho’s who marry to young. They may or may not have kids but they stay married and go through the motions, as they fear being disfellowshipped  (excommunicated) and thus being  shunned by Jo Ho friends and family.

3 – One or both cheats on the other and the marriage dissolves.

Oh, there are many shades and combinations of #2 and #3, but the bottom line is that the majority of these people are unhappy, feel there is no acceptable way out so they suffer, often for years, in silence. I lived that, pretending to be happy. Well, hypocrisy is hard work. Finally, I simply had enough and at 50 years of age, left my wife and the Witnesses. Actually, she left me. She moved out. When we were together, there was no misinterpreting my distain for her. I belittled her, complained about her. I guess I emotionally abused her. I didn’t love her, hadn’t for many years and in fact doubt that I ever did. It’s hard not to show your true feelings when you live with someone.

Is religion to blame, more precisely in my case, Jehovah’s Witnesses?

I can’t answer that. I can say that the usual unintended consequence of the “no sex before marriage” rule is kids marrying kids, having kids and being miserable.

In this case the Jo Ho’s don’t recommend early marriage, but do nothing to stop it. They say that one should marry after the bloom of youth, late 20’s or so, but few follow that advice. But, if you marry at 16 and fuck up at 18, they will disfellowship you with a vengeance!

“You satanic pervert! Be gone with you!”

The “no sex before marriage” is just another paradox that religion tries, most unsuccessfully, to deal with. It brings in the question of God’s motivation. He gives you this desire that makes you crazy, parades these pert, supple, tight assed nymphets in front of you, makes it peak in adolescence and then tells you that you can’t satisfy that desire unless you promise to spend the rest of your life with the woman of your choice.

In fact the Bible gives this sage advice, in 1 Corinthians 7: 8 + 9

⁸ Now I say to the unmarried persons and the widows, it is well for them that they remain even as I am. ⁹ But if they do not have self-control, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to be inflamed [with passion]. (NWT)

Oh yea, like most people have “self control”. I wonder if the Apostle Paul masturbated? I bet he did. Oh yea, that’s self abuse and you can’t do that either. If it wasn’t for wet dreams, you’d have sperm squirting out your ears.

At any rate, God allegedly makes our sexual drive peak at an age when we would be the least capable of making a logical choice for a marriage partner.  If we peaked at 30, wouldn’t that make more sense? Statistically, we’d make much better choices.

And religion does not see a problem with this? They faithfully carry the flag for God, fighting an uphill battle and losing.

How exactly does this make the Bible your “blueprint for life”?

Are Jehovah’s Witnesses Preparing the Membership for a New Date for Armageddon?

At the end of my commentary, I have put the complete Watchtower article I quote in this post.

 Having been wrong at least 7 times in the 20^th Century, so far in the 21^st The Watchtower Society has been silent on any new predictions for Armageddon. So, the Witnesses remain “dateless”.

 But fear not. There are some indications that these lovable number benders are again concocting another stab at the date when God destroys all the non Jo Ho’s in global carnage.  Before we look at the latest bullshit from the Watchtower Society, let’s take look at the historical bullshit.

 The Watchtower Society predicted that Armageddon, the end of the world, where Jehovah kills all those on earth who are not Jehovah’s Witnesses:

 Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19:

“ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.”

They said it would come, the so called “end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil”,  in 1914, before the end of the First World War, 1925, 1975, before the 1914 generation passed away and before the end of the 20^th Century.

Of course, unless I slept through it, I don’t think much of anything of the sort happened in the 20^th Century. Also, in 1995 the Watchtower Society changed the 1914 generation thing. So the generation was no longer relevant. Good thing, because at this writing in 2009, those folks would be 105 years old or so. Just for clarification, the Jo Ho’s defined that generation as those who were aware of the events of that year. They put that age of awareness at about 10 years old, making those people 105 in 2009.

Now, it looks like those loveable, crazy soothsayers and leaders of the deluded may, in fact be preparing the flock for another stab at predicting when Armageddon will come.

The Watchtower of 12/15/03, in the article entitled “Our Watchfulness Takes on Greater Urgency” seems to be making a parallel between the world in the days of Noah and the world today. Again, the article is reproduced in its entirety below, but I have summarized the main points.

From the article: “It is reasonable to assume that Jehovah feels about the present world as he felt about the pre-Flood world. Since he brought an end to the ungodly world of Noah’s day, he will certainly destroy the wicked world of today. Having a clear understanding of the parallel between that time and our day should fortify our conviction that the end of the present world is near. What, then, are the similarities? There are at least five.”

Here are those five similarities:

 1-      Warned of “Things Not Yet Beheld” – In a lame effort to validated their annoying door knocking work, they mention that those in Noah’s day were warned of the coming flood. Here’s a quote: “Just think what that meant for those then living! Only 120 years more and Jehovah would bring “the deluge of waters upon the earth to bring to ruin all flesh in which the force of life is active from under the heavens.” Gee, only 120 years? That hardly gives me time to finish my beer!

2-      Sexual Depravity Becomes Rampant  - Really? So why did God destroy Sodom and Gomorrah? Is sexual depravity anymore rampant today than at any time in history?

3-      Earth Becomes “Filled With Violence” – The world has been filled with violence throughout history.

4-      The Message Is Preached – Isn’t this the same as #1? Again, a lame effort to validated their annoying door knocking work. Also, all kinds of warnings, have been “preached” throughout the centuries. As with Jehovah’s Witnesses in the 20^th Century, all turned out to be bullshit.

5-      Only a Few Survive – Oh, yea. You remember that the Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19 said that “ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses” would survive Armageddon.

So, here we have it. Five similarities between Noah’s day and ours. Proving exactly what?

Well, here is my theory. The article asks “How do you view the worsening trend in human affairs?” You know that the Jo Ho’s are always crowing about how bad things are. They and they alone realize the significance of these “events”. The article continues: “The world’s influential and intellectual men do not discern the meaning of “the signs of the times”; neither have religious leaders given proper guidance in this matter.”

So they ask: “Hence, the question that we must reflect on is: ‘What will help us to strengthen our conviction that the end is near?”

They than outline the above five points , paralleling Noah’s day and ours.

Taking this article and what I know about Jo Ho’s, from being one for 50 years, it looks like the Watchtower Society Is prepping the Sheeple for a new date, new light. Notice again this quote: “Only 120 years more and Jehovah would bring “the deluge of waters upon the earth to bring to ruin all flesh in which the force of life is active from under the heavens.”—Genesis 6:17.”

Than this: “It is reasonable to assume that Jehovah feels about the present world as he felt about the pre-Flood world. Since he brought an end to the ungodly world of Noah’s day, he will certainly destroy the wicked world of today. Having a clear understanding of the parallel between that time and our day should fortify our conviction that the end of the present world is near. What, then, are the similarities?” Than the five “similarities.

Leading to what conclusion? Again from the article: “When God’s Messianic Kingdom was established in heaven in 1914, the enthroned King, Jesus Christ, took epoch-making action. Satan the Devil and his demons were ousted from heaven to the vicinity of the earth.”

So, here’s my guess. The Jo Ho’s are beginning to link the year 1914 with the 120 years it took Noah to build the Ark. So, I’m guessing that soon, they will predict the year 2034, or 120 years after 1914 as the year when Armageddon will come….or it will come before that year…or some other bullshit they make up.

Soon, the little Jo Ho’s will be reading stuff like the following:

“Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin against the modern antitype of Jerusalem, Christendom.” From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216.

And they’ll suck it up, as always. Good little Jo Ho’s. Don’t worry guys, if it does not end in 2034, the odds are in your favor. The world can’t last forever. The Watchtower is bound to be right sooner or later.

__________________________________________________________________

The Watchtower article:

“Our Watchfulness Takes on Greater Urgency” from The Watchtower of 12/15/03

“Keep on the watch, therefore, because you do not know on what day your Lord is coming.”—MATTHEW 24:42.

“ABOVE all other things, the twentieth century was shaped by war,” says author Bill Emmott. While admitting that all periods of human history have felt the weight of wars and violence, he adds: “The twentieth century did not differ in kind, it differed in degree. It was the first century to feature a truly world-spanning conflict . . . And, as if to emphasize the point, it featured not just one such worldwide conflict, but two.”

² Wars that involve ‘nation against nation and kingdom against kingdom’ were foretold by Jesus Christ. However, they are just one aspect of ‘the sign of Christ’s presence and of the conclusion of the system of things.’ In this great prophecy, Jesus also mentioned famines, pestilences, and earthquakes. (Matthew 24:3, 7, 8; Luke 21:6, 7, 10, 11) In many respects, such calamities have increased in scope and severity. The badness of man is abundant, as seen in his attitude toward God and fellowman. Moral breakdown and increase in crime and violence are evident. Men have become lovers of money rather than lovers of God, obsessed with pleasure. All this testifies that we are living in “critical times.”—2 Timothy 3:1-5.

³ How do you view the worsening trend in human affairs? Many are indifferent, even callous, to distressing events of the day. The world’s influential and intellectual men do not discern the meaning of “the signs of the times”; neither have religious leaders given proper guidance in this matter. (Matthew 16:1-3) But Jesus admonished his followers: “Keep on the watch, therefore, because you do not know on what day your Lord is coming.” (Matthew 24:42) Jesus here encourages us not only to be watchful but to “keep on the watch.” To keep on the watch, we must remain alert and vigilant. This requires more than simply acknowledging that we are living in the last days, more than recognizing that times are hard. We must have firm conviction that “the end of all things has drawn close.” (1 Peter 4:7) Only then will our watchfulness take on a sense of urgency. Hence, the question that we must reflect on is: ‘What will help us to strengthen our conviction that the end is near?’

⁴ Consider the conditions prevailing during the time preceding a one-of-a-kind event in human history—the great Deluge of Noah’s day. People were so bad that Jehovah “felt hurt at his heart.” He declared: “I am going to wipe men whom I have created off the surface of the ground.” (Genesis 6:6, 7) And he did just that. Drawing a parallel between then and now, Jesus said: “Just as the days of Noah were, so the presence of the Son of man will be.”—Matthew 24:37.

⁵ It is reasonable to assume that Jehovah feels about the present world as he felt about the pre-Flood world. Since he brought an end to the ungodly world of Noah’s day, he will certainly destroy the wicked world of today. Having a clear understanding of the parallel between that time and our day should fortify our conviction that the end of the present world is near. What, then, are the similarities? There are at least five. The first is that a warning of coming destruction is given in no uncertain terms.

Warned of “Things Not Yet Beheld”

⁶ In Noah’s day, Jehovah declared: “My spirit shall not act toward man indefinitely in that he is also flesh. Accordingly his days shall amount to a hundred and twenty years.” (Genesis 6:3) The issuance of this divine decree in 2490 B.C.E. marked the beginning of the end for that ungodly world. Just think what that meant for those then living! Only 120 years more and Jehovah would bring “the deluge of waters upon the earth to bring to ruin all flesh in which the force of life is active from under the heavens.”—Genesis 6:17.

⁷ Noah received the warning of the upcoming catastrophe decades in advance, and he wisely used the time to prepare for survival. “After being given divine warning of things not yet beheld,” says the apostle Paul, “[Noah] showed godly fear and constructed an ark for the saving of his household.” (Hebrews 11:7) What about us? Some 90 years have passed since the last days of this system of things began in 1914. We are certainly in “the time of the end.” (Daniel 12:4) How should we respond to warnings we have been given? “He that does the will of God remains forever,” states the Bible. (1 John 2:17) Now is therefore the time to do Jehovah’s will with a keen sense of urgency.

⁸ In modern times, sincere students of the Bible have learned from the inspired Scriptures that this system is doomed to destruction. Do we believe this? Notice what Jesus Christ clearly stated: “There will be great tribulation such as has not occurred since the world’s beginning until now, no, nor will occur again.” (Matthew 24:21) Jesus also said that he would come as God’s appointed Judge and would separate people as a shepherd separates sheep from goats. Those found unworthy would “depart into everlasting cutting-off, but the righteous ones into everlasting life.”—Matthew 25:31-33, 46.

⁹ Jehovah has kept these warnings in front of his people by means of timely reminders through the spiritual food provided by “the faithful and discreet slave.” (Matthew 24:45-47) Moreover, every nation, tribe, tongue, and people are called upon to “fear God and give him glory, because the hour of the judgment by him has arrived.” (Revelation 14:6, 7) An integral part of the Kingdom message preached earth wide by Jehovah’s Witnesses is the warning that God’s Kingdom will soon remove human rulership. (Daniel 2:44) This warning is not to be taken lightly. Almighty God always keeps his word. (Isaiah 55:10, 11) He did in Noah’s day, and he will in our day.—2 Peter 3:3-7.

Sexual Depravity Becomes Rampant

¹⁰ Our time corresponds to Noah’s day in another respect. Jehovah had commanded the first man and woman to “fill the earth” with their kind, using their God-given sexual powers honorably within the marriage arrangement. (Genesis 1:28) In Noah’s day, disobedient angels contaminated humanity with unnatural sex. They came down to earth, materialized bodies, and cohabited with beautiful women, producing offspring that were half human, half demon—the Nephilim. (Genesis 6:2, 4) The sin of these lustful angels is likened to the perversions of Sodom and Gomorrah. (Jude 6, 7) Consequently, sexual depravity was widespread in those days.

¹¹ What about the moral climate of today? In these final days, the lives of many revolve around sex. Paul graphically describes such ones as “having come to be past all moral sense”; many have given themselves over “to loose conduct to work uncleanness of every sort with greediness.” (Ephesians 4:19) Pornography, premarital sex, sexual abuse of children, and homosexuality are commonplace. Some are already “receiving in themselves the full recompense” in the form of sexually transmitted diseases, breakdown of family life, and other social ills.—Romans 1:26, 27.

¹² In Noah’s day, Jehovah sent the great Deluge and brought an end to that sex-crazed world. We must never lose sight of the fact that these days are truly just as the days of Noah were. The upcoming “great tribulation” will clear the earth of ‘fornicators, adulterers, men kept for unnatural purposes, and men who lie with men.’ (Matthew 24:21; 1 Corinthians 6:9, 10; Revelation 21:8) How urgent it is that we cultivate hatred for what is bad and stay clear of circumstances that could lead to immorality!—Psalm 97:10; 1 Corinthians 6:18.

Earth Becomes “Filled With Violence”

¹³ Pointing to yet another characteristic of Noah’s day, the Bible states: “The earth came to be ruined in the sight of the true God and the earth became filled with violence.” (Genesis 6:11) Violence was not actually new. Adam’s son Cain murdered his righteous brother. (Genesis 4:8) Reflecting the violent spirit of his day, Lamech composed a poem boasting about how he had killed a young man, allegedly in self-defense. (Genesis 4:23, 24) What was new in Noah’s day was the degree of violence. As disobedient angelic sons of God married women on earth and produced progeny—the Nephilim—violence increased to a level previously unknown. These violent giants were “the Fellers”—“those who cause others to fall down.” (Genesis 6:4, footnote) As a result, the earth was “full of violence.” (Genesis 6:13) Imagine the problems Noah must have faced bringing up his family in such an environment! Yet, Noah proved to be ‘righteous before Jehovah among that generation.’—Genesis 7:1.

¹⁴ Violence has been with mankind throughout the ages. But as was true in the days of Noah, our time has also witnessed it on an unprecedented scale. We regularly hear about domestic violence, acts of terrorism, campaigns of genocide, and mass killings by gunmen with little apparent motive. Add to all of this the bloodshed caused by wars. The earth has again become filled with violence. Why? What has contributed to the increase? The answer reveals another similarity to Noah’s day.

¹⁵ When God’s Messianic Kingdom was established in heaven in 1914, the enthroned King, Jesus Christ, took epoch-making action. Satan the Devil and his demons were ousted from heaven to the vicinity of the earth. (Revelation 12:9-12) Before the Flood, disobedient angels forsook their heavenly position voluntarily; in modern times, however, they were forcibly evicted. Furthermore, they now lack the ability to materialize human bodies on earth in order to enjoy illicit fleshly pleasures. So in frustration, anger, and fear of impending judgment, they influence men and organizations to perform inhuman acts of crime and violence of even greater magnitude than those of Noah’s day. Jehovah obliterated the pre-Flood world after disobedient angels and their offspring had filled it with badness. Make no mistake about it, he will not do any less in our day! (Psalm 37:10) However, those staying watchful today know that their deliverance is near.

The Message Is Preached

¹⁶ The fourth point of similarity between the present day and the pre-Flood world is seen in the work that Noah was commissioned to do. Noah constructed a huge ark. He was also “a preacher.” (2 Peter 2:5) What message did he preach? Noah’s preaching evidently included a call for repentance and a warning of coming destruction. Jesus said that the people of Noah’s day “took no note until the flood came and swept them all away.”—Matthew 24:38, 39.

¹⁷ Similarly, as Jehovah’s Witnesses diligently fulfill their commission to preach, the message of God’s Kingdom is being declared worldwide. In almost every part of the globe, people can hear and read the Kingdom message in their own language. The Watchtower magazine, announcing Jehovah’s Kingdom, has a circulation of over 25,000,000 and is printed in more than 140 languages. Indeed, the good news of God’s Kingdom is being preached “in all the inhabited earth for a witness to all the nations.” When that work is completed to God’s satisfaction, the end is certain to come.—Matthew 24:14.

¹⁸ Given the spiritual and moral bankruptcy of the days preceding the Flood, it is not hard to imagine how Noah’s family became the laughingstock of incredulous neighbors and the object of abuse and ridicule. The end did come though. Similarly, “ridiculers with their ridicule” abound in the last days. “Yet Jehovah’s day will come as a thief,” states the Bible. (2 Peter 3:3, 4, 10) Come it will at the appointed time. It will not be late. (Habakkuk 2:3) How wise we are to keep on the watch!

Only a Few Survive

¹⁹ The parallel between Noah’s day and our day does not end with the badness of the people and their destruction. As there were Flood survivors, so there will be those who survive the end of the present system of things. The Flood survivors were meek ones who did not live as the people in general did. They heeded the divine warning and kept separate from the wicked world of that time. “Noah found favor in the eyes of Jehovah,” states the Bible. “[Noah] proved himself faultless among his contemporaries.” (Genesis 6:8, 9) Out of all mankind, one family, “a few people, that is, eight souls, were carried safely through the water.” (1 Peter 3:20) And to them Jehovah God gave a mandate saying: “Be fruitful and become many and fill the earth.”—Genesis 9:1.

²⁰ God’s Word assures us that “a great crowd” will “come out of the great tribulation.” (Revelation 7:9, 14) How many will there be in the great crowd? Jesus himself said: “Narrow is the gate and cramped the road leading off into life, and few are the ones finding it.” (Matthew 7:13, 14) Compared to the billions living on earth now, the survivors of the upcoming great tribulation will be few. But they may well have a privilege similar to that given to the Flood survivors. The survivors may for a time be able to have offspring as a part of the new earthly society.—Isaiah 65:23.

“Keep on the Watch”

²¹ Although the Flood seems remote from our day, it clearly provides a warning that we must not ignore. (Romans 15:4) The similarities between Noah’s day and our day should make us increasingly aware of the significance of what is happening and alert us to the thieflike coming of Jesus to execute judgment upon the wicked.

²² Today, Jesus Christ is directing a tremendous spiritual building work. For the security and survival of true worshipers, an arklike spiritual paradise exists. (2 Corinthians 12:3, 4) To be preserved through the great tribulation, we must remain in that paradise. Surrounding the domain of the spiritual paradise is Satan’s world, ready to assimilate any who have become spiritually drowsy. It is imperative that we “keep on the watch” and prove ourselves ready for Jehovah’s day.—Matthew 24:42, 44.

Do You Recall?

• What admonition did Jesus give concerning his coming?

• With what does Jesus compare the time of his presence?

• In what ways are our times similar to the days of Noah?

• How should reflecting upon the similarities between Noah’s day and our day affect our sense of urgency?

[Study Questions]

1, 2. What shows that we are living in the conclusion of the present system of things?

 3. How should “the signs of the times” affect us?

4, 5. (a) What will strengthen our conviction that the end of this wicked system is near, and why? (b) What is one similarity between Noah’s day and the presence of the Son of man?

 6. What did Jehovah determine to do in Noah’s day?

 7. (a) What was Noah’s response to the warning about the Flood? (b) How should we respond to warnings about the end of this system?

8, 9. What warnings have been given in modern times, and how are these being declared?

10. What can be said about sexual depravity in Noah’s day?

11. What moral climate makes our time similar to the days of Noah?

12. Why should we cultivate hatred for what is bad?

13. In Noah’s day, why was the earth “filled with violence”?

14. How has the world today become “filled with violence”?

15. (a) What has contributed to the increase in violence in the last days? (b) Of what outcome can we be confident?

16, 17. What is the fourth similarity between the days of Noah and our day?

18. How does the response of many to our preaching activity compare with that of most people in Noah’s day?

19, 20. What parallel can we draw between the Flood and the destruction of the present system of things?

21, 22. (a) How has this consideration of the Flood account benefited you? (b) What is the yeartext for 2004, and why should we heed the advice it gives?

Jehovah’s Witnesses History of False Prophesies

My last post: “Are Jehovah’s Witnesses Preparing the membership for a New Date for Armageddon”, was actually part one of a two part article. I became so engrossed in several related subjects that I have not fully finished part two. I like to completely research my posts. Please do not hesitate to point out where I am factually wrong.

I have been getting a lot of emails about my book, (work in progress) and about people with similar experiences as I had, growing up Jo Ho. I spend many hours answering emails, which is great.

The entire point of this blog, my forthcoming book and all the other associated efforts on my part is this:

I don’t know and neither do you.

I cannot say who God is, what He/She/It/Them want from us, if the Bible or any “ Holy Books” are, in fact Holy, in that they are from “God”. I can say, with certainty that I have not yet seen an Organized Religion that in any way, shape or form can present a minute amount of evidence or facts that prove that it and it alone represents ”God”, all though they all arrogantly claim to.

100% of the religions I have researched hang themselves by their actions or teachings. In all fairness, obviously I don’t know it all. But I do know a lot simply because I read about stuff all the time. Maybe I haven’t found the “true religion” yet. However to date, in multiple ways Organized Religion continues to show its true colors by inciting violence and sowing seeds of hate against “non believers”, exploiting in many ways their “flock” and hypocritically claiming to represent the God of love while their actions are deceitful, injurious and manipulative.

If you feel compelled to tell me about how you found the “true religion”, tell me what it is in less than 25 words and I will do my own reserach. If I have questions, I email you. If you are a Jehovah’s Witness, go fuck yourself. I most likely know more about your religion than you do. My life experience has been as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

The Jo Ho’s are the master number and date benders, misquotes, distorters of fact and making wild and improvable claims and prophesies that never come true. For example the Watchtower Society prophesied that Armageddon would come at six separate and distinct time periods and they were wrong on all six predictions.

1914 – “In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.” (The Time is at Hand, 1902 edition, p. 99) Note: this same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book.

End of WW1: “The present great war in Europe is the beginning of the Armageddon of the Scriptures (Revelation 19:16-20). It will eventuate in the complete overthrow of all the systems of error which have so long oppressed the people of God and deluded the world”. (Pastor Russell’s Sermons, 1915, p. 676) In the same year (1915),

1925 – “The period must end in 1925 . . . [This date] is definitely fixed in the Scriptures. Every thinking person can see that a great climax is at hand. The scriptures clearly indicate that the climax is the fall of Satan’s empire and the full establishment of the Messianic kingdom . . . Therefore, it can be confidently said at this time that millions now living will never die”. (Golden Age, January 4, 1922, p. 217)

1975 – Watchtower, October 15, 1969 pages 622 and 623:

“More recently earnest researchers of the Holy Bible have made a recheck of its chronology. According to their calculations the six millenniums of mankind’s life on earth would end in the mid-seventies…. Would not, then, the end of six millenniums of mankind’s laborious enslavement under Satan the Devil be the fitting time for Jehovah God to usher in a Sabbath millennium for all his human creatures? Yes, indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.”

Notice the use of the definite article “the”. It would be “the fitting time”, not “a fitting time” not “an appropriate time” but “THE FITTING TIME”, to the exclusion of all other times. “Yes, Indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath”. Not “might be”, not “could be”, but “WILL BE”.

End of the 20th Century – Again in 1971, they said it would come in the 20th century: ”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

Within the life span of the 1914 generation: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

None of the above happened and as of 1995, the above 1914 thing is wrong.

So, “God’s Exclusive Mouthpiece”, as they claim? What do you think?

Great Jehovah’s Witness Blog

This is a short post but I felt compelled to direct you all to this interesting blog.:

http://www.virushead.net/vhrandom/2009/08/01/roundup-of-jws-in-the-news

The guy posts some great references. I liked the book, “I’m Perfect, You’re Doomed, Tales from a Jehovah’s Witness upbringing.” I have not read it, but it is on my “to do” list. It looks good!

The part where the eight year old feels his Mother’s wrath brings back some of my childhood highlights with Elder Hitler and Frau Two Faced.

I actually knew a kid, about 3 or 4 years younger than me, who’s Jo Ho parents would lock him in a closet when he was bad or just when it suited them. How do I know? Well, I heard his father threaten him with being locked in the closet several times and at age 15 he beat the shit out of his mother when she tried to lock him up. 

He ran away and when he was caught, told the cops and the mother confessed. He was actually taken from his parents at a time when that was very rare. To be fair, other religious people mistreated their kids als0, but Jo Ho’s claim to be so different. They are all just lying ass hypocrites.

EDIT: The writer of this blog is not a guy, but in fact a pretty cute chick!! She is evidently a PHD and several other letter and number combinations. She has quite an entertaining presentation.

And yes, I am a sexist pig, who thinks with his dick and views all women as sex objects. Oh yea, and I like big tits.

Anyway, this fine educated young lady is a hoot! Read her stuff…..try not to picture her naked……

Jehovah’s Witnesses Apologize for 1975

To all those asshole Jehovah’s Witness 1975 deniers, here is the Watchtower “sort of” apologzing for the whole shit storm it caused:

The Watchtower 3/15/80, pg 17:

In modern times such eagerness, commendable in itself, has led to attempts at setting dates for the desired liberation from the suffering and troubles that are the lot of persons throughout the earth. With the appearance of the book Life Everlasting—in Freedom of the Sons of God, and its comments as to how appropriate it would be for the millennial reign of Christ to parallel the seventh millennium of man’s existence, considerable expectation was aroused regarding the year 1975. There were statements made then, and thereafter, stressing that this was only a possibility. Unfortunately, however, along with such cautionary information, there were other statements published that implied that such realization of hopes by that year was more of a probability than a mere possibility. It is to be regretted that these latter statements apparently overshadowed the cautionary ones and contributed to a buildup of the expectation already initiated.

 ”Oh, the Watchtower Society never said Armageddon was coming in 1975″ asshole Jo Ho’s will say. Than why do they above say:

 ”There were statements made then, and thereafter, stressing that this was only a possibility. Unfortunately, however, along with such cautionary information, there were other statements published that implied that such realization of hopes by that year was more of a probability than a mere possibility. It is to be regretted that these latter statements apparently overshadowed the cautionary ones and contributed to a buildup of the expectation already initiated.”

So, they published statements that implied that Armageddon coming in 1975 was more”of a probability than a mere possibility”.

Ya’ think?? This is what us hapless Jo Ho’s were being fed prior to 1975:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

What, you sold your house. quit your job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?

The Watchtower Society did! If you were a loyal Jo Ho and read this, under the circumstances,  what would you think? I was and what did I think???  I couldn’t wait for Jehovah to kill all you non believers in a display of righteous global carnage.

Also, we read this from the Witness book, “The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? “, 1971 p. 216:

JEHOVAH’S “SWORD” AGAINST “ALL THOSE OF FLESH”

Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin against the modern antitype of Jerusalem, Christendom.”

Did I miss something? Isn’t the 20th Century over? Oops!! The Jo Ho’s are wrong again. 

And at age 18 I was reading this from the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

Well, it’s 2009 assholes and I’m 58, I have a degree and I am wraping up my second career. So much for your predictions.

Jehovah’s Witnesses say “Don’t Blame God if We’re wrong”!!

To get the flavor of the point of this post, it would be helpful to read my post of 10/11/09, below.

From the Watchtower, 3/15/80, page 17:

⁶”In its issue of July 15, 1976, The Watchtower, commenting on the inadvisability of setting our sights on a certain date, stated: “If anyone has been disappointed through not following this line of thought, he should now concentrate on adjusting his viewpoint, seeing that it was not the word of God that failed or deceived him and brought disappointment, but that his own understanding was based on wrong premises.” In saying “anyone,” The Watchtower included all disappointed ones of Jehovah’s Witnesses, hence including persons having to do with the publication of the information that contributed to the buildup of hopes centered on that date.”

Basically, The Watchtower Society admittedly published many statements, pre 1975, that led it’s followers (I was one) to believe that Armageddon, or the destruction of everyone who is not a Jo Ho, by the Almighty God, would come in the year 1975. Again, see my post below, of 10/11/09.

Than the almighty purveyors of holy knowledge, soothsayers and predictors of false dates have the balls to print the statement above in the July, 1976 Watchtower: If you thought Armageddon was coming in 1975, you screwed yourself.

 It reminds me of this quote from Animal House, in 1978, by Otter: “Flounder, you can’t spend your whole life worrying about your mistakes! You fucked up – you trusted us!”

The Watchtower Society, to the membership: “And by the way asshole, the word of God didn’t fail, you did, you miserable puke, scum sucking pig, maggot. We’re the Mouthpiece of God. You must be the problem. Remember, your “own understanding was based on wrong premises.” Shit for brains! Hey, don’t forget to contribute”

Indeed it was. The understanding of the membership was based on the “wrong premises” that The Watchtower Society, conceived and published: Armageddon was coming in 1975. Further, the facts show that in the big picture, the “wrong premises” seems to believing anything the Watchtower Society says.

They said that Armageddon was coming at seven distinct years or time periods in the 20^th Century. It’s October 2009 and still nothing.

“Oh, it’s around the corner” the little deluded Jo Ho’s crow. I say, what the hell. Keep predicting the end of the world. You’re bound to be right sooner or later.

However, I would guess that how it ends will surprise the Watchtower Society as much as it does the rest of us unbelieving religious and/or unreligious swine.

Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19:

“ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.”

So far, considering that the Jo Ho’s are wrong, at least 7 for 7, I wouldn’t count on their version of the end of the world being accurate either.

But, I bet that if it’s a nuke from Al-Qaida, a tsunami or an asteroid, the Watchtower Society will still spin it in their favor:

“Yea, well God revealed to us that it was going to be an Al-Qaida nuke. We knew it all the time”

If there is anyone left to listen to them.

More Insane Bible Bullshit

From a recent article “Conservatizing the Bible”, by Rod Dreher. The entire article is reprinted below as well as the link to the site.

 Apparently, some “eager young men at Conservapedia are p.o.’d that the Bible might be seen as too liberal. So they’ve come up with the Wiki-style Conservative Bible Project, to make sure the Lord doesn’t go all wobbly on us.”

 One particularly  loony quote from these guys site is “Liberal bias has become the single biggest distortion in modern Bible translations”

What?? Am I missing something? Silly me I thought the Left and Liberals in general were not religious. I do not recall hearing of any liberal conspiracy to “liberally bias” the Bible. The Bible is already, in general far more conservative than liberal, in regards to abortion, a woman’s place in marriage, etc. In fact, many conservatives get their views from their religion and ultimately the Bible.

Also, as a side point, my view on liberals and religion may be wrong as I am a conservative Republican and I am in no way religious. I despise organized religion.

I guess what I’m saying is that this is a “non issue”.  These guys have way too much time on their hands.

I don’t believe that the Bible is from God or that Jesus was an historical figure, making me decidedly non Christian. So it doesn’t matter to me if they make the Bible a comic book. In fact, I believe someone already has. At any rate, here is more crazy Bible bullshit. It actually proves nothing except that people will devote a lot of time and effort to fix “problems” that do not exist.

Hey, assholes, get a real job!

__________________________________________________________________________

Here’s the whole article:

Conservatizing the Bible

The eager young men at Conservapedia are p.o.’d that the Bible might be seen as too liberal. So they’ve come up with the Wiki-style Conservative Bible Project, to make sure the Lord doesn’t go all wobbly on us. Excerpt:

As of 2009, there is no fully conservative translation of the Bible which satisfies the following ten guidelines:[1]

Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias

Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, “gender inclusive” language, and other modern emasculation of Christianity

Not Dumbed Down: not dumbing down the reading level, or diluting the intellectual force and logic of Christianity; the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level[2]

Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop;[3] defective translations use the word “comrade” three times as often as “volunteer”; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as “word”, “peace”, and “miracle”

Combat Harmful Addiction: combating addiction by using modern terms for it, such as “gamble” rather than “cast lots”;[4] using modern political terms, such as “register” rather than “enroll” for the census

Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.

Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning

Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages: excluding the later-inserted liberal passages that are not authentic, such as the adulteress story

Credit Open-Mindedness of Disciples: crediting open-mindedness, often found in youngsters like the eyewitnesses Mark and John, the authors of two of the Gospels

Prefer Conciseness over Liberal Wordiness: preferring conciseness to the liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio; avoid compound negatives and unnecessary ambiguities
Thus, a project has begun among members of Conservapedia to translate the Bible in accordance with these principles. The translated Bible can be found here.

“The liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio”? Hoo-wee! Elitists like to use words, and lots of ‘em! “Unnecessary ambiguities”? But how are you going to abide by the conservative mandate to avoid “dumbing down” Holy Writ while at the same time avoiding big words liberals use?

More seriously, the insane hubris of this really staggers the mind. These right-wing ideologues know better than the early church councils that canonized Scripture? They really think it’s wise to force the word of God to conform to a 21st-century American idea of what constitutes conservatism? These jokers don’t worship God. They worship ideology. As Mark Shea says:

Right wing dementia marches on apace. Some of this has a grain of sense to it, as ideological madness always does. For instance, the dumb attempts to feminize Scripture are pernicious and need to stop. But seriously: the story of the woman taken in adultery is “liberal”? Free market as Sacred tradition? Liberal wordiness?

You really need to read the whole Conservapedia entry to grasp how crazy this is. It’s like what you’d get if you crossed the Jesus Seminar with the College Republican chapter at a rural institution of Bible learnin’.

http://blog.beliefnet.com/crunchycon/2009/10/conservatizing-the-bible.html

Jehovah’s Witnesses Still Discourage Higher Education

As a JW for 50 years from birth I have experienced the whole evolution of the Jo Ho higher education thing. All during my association with the Jo Ho’s, the constant mantra was against higher education.

This is what I was reading at age 18, from the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

And from the same Awake, page 15:

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

So why bother with higher eductaion as the World is about to end? Just do the minimum and spend as much time as you can in the Jo Ho preaching work. In fact, you should devote yourself to it:

Further, they expected God to destroy the World in 1975 so up until 1975 we were reading this type of stuff:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

What, you sold your house. quit you job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?

But, never being ones to quit, when Armageddon did not come in 1975, they had a fall back prediction:

From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216:

JEHOVAH’S “SWORD” AGAINST “ALL THOSE OF FLESH”

9 Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin against the modern antitype of Jerusalem, Christendom.”

So, in view of all this, why go to college. Also, you meet a lot of bad people there who may influence you to turn away from the Witnesses (meaning, you may learn stuff that shows the JW’s to be full of crap) Devote yourselves to the Truth (as interpreted by the Watchtower Society). Give us your life. Make more converts. Soon, God will reward you!

Since the World hasn’t ended, it may seem that  there is a JW loosening up of the “don’t go to college” mantra.

The Watchtower of 11/1/92, page 18 pointed out that what was considered as an adequate level of schooling required to earn a decent wage had changed and it had become difficult to find jobs with only a high school degree. So now is higher education is “permitted.”

Not withstanding that the Jo Ho’s cannot and generally do not punish officially anyone who goes to college, if you read the whole article fromt the above Watchtower, you’ll understand that the Jo Ho’s still discourage any type of education that doesn’t allow the person to devote themselves to the Watchtower cause.

While they may say officially that perhaps getting more than the minimum education may be to some advantage, the overwhelming consensus among the membership is still “Why go to college? You meet a lot of bad people there who may influence you to turn away from the Witnesses (meaning, you may learn stuff that shows the JW’s to be full of crap) Devote yourselves to the Truth (as interpreted by the Watchtower Society). Give us your life. Make more converts. Soon, God will reward you!” Gee, that sounds familiar.

But, what of most of the JW’s of my generation who, unlike myself, took the Watchtower Societies advice and did not get an education or career? Now in their 50′s and 60′s most do not have much money and no decent retirement.

In fact, I know of a “retired” couple, in their early 70′s who both work at a fast food place. I have known them for 40 years. They specifically did not seek a career and were full time door knockers (pioneers) for most of their life. And, yes they and many others are bitter. They are no longer Jo Ho’s.

“You want fries with that” is the new mantra of the Senior Citizen Jehovah’s Witness.

So to Jo Ho youth, as one who has had the experience of being heavily pressured not to pursue higher education, would you say that at 59 years old in 2009, I made the right choice? Higher eductaion did not cause me to leave the JW’s. Their lying false prophesies did, two of which I quote above.

“Oh, but it’s differant now! Armageddon is that much closer now!!”

Yea, sure it is. But, keep saying the world will end. You’re bound to be right at least once. In 2049 when your are wiping up hurl and lung butter at the local fuel depot, for minimum wage, remember this post. 

Don’t be a moron.

Crazy Ass N.C. Church Plans to Burn Bibles and other Christian Books

The full article and link are below

The thing about crazy ass religious shit is that it never stops. I’m glad I chose this subject for a blog. I was thinking of doing a tropical fish blog, but irrational behavior and loony stuff are rare in the tropical fish world.

“Blue Gourami Claims Sponge Bob is the Anti-Christ”. This is a headline you are not likely to see anytime soon.

Although, there was this woman in Groton, Connecticut who fatally shot her husband, claiming that her goldfish “Luigi” told her to. It seems that she and Luigi were in love. That would explain her long baths, with Luigi, him playing hide and seek in that secret place that already smells like fish.

At any rate, religion is again fodder for the comedy cannon. Now, it seems a “North Carolina pastor says his church plans to burn Bibles and books by Christian authors on Halloween to light a fire under true believers.”

“Pastor Marc Grizzard told Asheville TV station WLOS that the King James Version of the Bible is the only one his small western North Carolina church follows. He says all other versions, such as the Living Bible, are “satanic” and “perversions” of God’s word.”

How does old Grizzy know all this? Why would Satan cause any Bibles to be written? Does Grizzy know the history of the King James Version? Can he explain why that version is the true version? Does Grizzy have a Holy Magic Bass that gives him this information? Is Mrs. Grizzy taking baths with the Magic Bass?

These are questions that demand answers!

Certainly, a major question for Grizzy is why would Satan cause any Bibles to be written? “Oh, so he could pervert the Word of God in an attempt to hide the truth of God.” If that’s the case, why is it that the King James Version has as many interpretations as it does readers? The King James Bible is already a cryptic, jumbled, contradictory fairy tale. It would seem to be to Satan’s advantage to leave it alone.

Also, has Grizzy indeed considered the origins of the King James Bible? So, just how’d we get the King James Version there, Bass Pastor?

Well, here’s the scoop. After he was made King of England in 1603, James, the 1st, arranged a conference at Hampton Court in order to settle religious differences between the Puritan wing of the Church of England and the Bishops. These “religious differences” were your typical “religious differences” as they had nothing to do with religion and more to do with who got what, who had power over whom and who got first dibs on the wenches. Religious bullshit politics as usual.

The Puritans were pressing both for a number of changes in the form or set of forms for public religious worship and for the bishops to be deprived of a share of parochial tithes.

 “No money for those Bishop fuckheads. Man, what Loooosers!! What a fine display of Godly love from these Holy Men. The Puritan’s demands were set out in what was known as The Millenary Petition, of which the full text is available at this link:

http://history.hanover.edu/project.html. What a boring piece of shit this is, but I bet old Grizzy hasn’t read it.

The King had already pretty much already agreed with the Puritans, to the consternation of the Bishops. Well, the conference opened on 14 January 1604 and in the end the bishops prevailed: no changes were made. 

Man, it sucked to be a Bishop. The King now doesn’t like you, you get no money, the Puritans are high fiving each other and giving you the finger. Assholes.

However, the conference was effectively the catalyst leading to the preparation of a new English Bible, the King James Bible. It was decided to proceed with a completely new translation to replace the Geneva bible in current use. This Bible, first published in England in 1560 (1569 in Scotland) was much disliked by James for its marginal notes which challenged his divine primacy as monarch.

The new Bible, the King James Version was first published in 1611. Although not initially popular it came to exert an enormous influence on the development of the English language.

This is condensed from the article at this link: http://www.twickenham-museum.org.uk/detail.asp?ContentID=22

While the King James Bible was being “revised” (remember it is a version, not a translation. A version is a revision of earlier works) if there were any controversies or questions they were solved by King James, after all he had the divine right of Kings, meaning he was appointed by God so who else would settle any controversies.

Toady, the Varlet: “Hey, King James, Basil says this verse should say “Lake of Basil”. I say it should say “Lake of Fire” but you have the final word. Which is it?”

“Hmmm” the King mutters. Stoking the royal beard “My divine self says that it should be the “Lake of Fish”

“Ooookkkayy” says Toady, the Varlet, rolling his eyes, “Lake of Fish it is”.

So back to Pastor Marc Grizzard and The Church of “What Crazy Shit Can We Do Today?”  The Bible that King James of England had redone to his liking, is the only true Bible? Remember, he had it redone because the Geneva bible, the version that was in current use, challenged his divine primacy as monarch.

So, I would guess Grizzy accepts that King James was indeed inspired by God to produce the only authentic and true Bible. So what if he had it redone because the Geneva bible challenged his divine primacy as monarch. Hey, facts or lack thereof don’t slow Pastor Grizzard or any other religious lunatic for that matter. Grizzy remains determined to make a total asshole of himself.

The point is that all during the Bible’s history there have been many Versions and Translations by numerous scholars and religious assholes, each with his own agenda.

Here is a fun fact about Jehovah’s Witnesses and their New World Translation. The Jo Hos, not to be outdone by King James and any of them there other counterfeit Bible translators working for Satan have their  own Bible too. They translated it all by themselves, too. Here is what they say about it:

 Watchtower 8/1/62, pg 480:

“The way these two words have been rendered in the New World Translation has given rise to the charge that the New World Bible Translation Committee let their religious beliefs influence them. That charge is true, but they did not do so wrongly, or unduly. The meaning that is to be given to these two Greek words depends upon what the entire Bible has to say about Jehovah God and Jesus Christ. How so? In that there is basis for translating these words either as “Deity,” “Divinity” or “Godhead” and so attributing personality to them, or as “Divine Nature,” “divine quality,” “Godship,” and having them merely denote qualities. Thus those who believe in the trinity will attach personality to these words, whereas those who do not will render them as qualities in view of the way God and Christ are described in the Scriptures and so as to harmonize the words with the rest of God’s Word. This emphasizes the fact that one simply cannot properly and accurately translate the Bible unless one clearly understands its teachings.”

Note the above says “the New World Bible Translation Committee let their religious beliefs influence them” and  “This emphasizes the fact that one simply cannot properly and accurately translate the Bible unless one clearly understands its teachings.”

If Jehovah’s Witnesses are translating the Bible, whose teachings will they favor. Why, theirs of course!  But the question is which came first “the Truth”, Witness Theology or a correct Bible from which to glean the truth? If you can learn the truth from any Bible, as the Jo Ho’s claim, why did they bother translating their own?

And to Grizzy’s consternation, the Jo Ho’s favor their Bible over the King James Version.

On the matter of which is the “correct Bible”, who the fuck knows and who the fuck cares. Just keep cranking out the crazy ass religious bullshit, you little deluded fanatics you, so I can have fodder for my blog.

In the meantime, when you’re not burning books Grizzy, maybe you, Mrs. Grizzy and the Magic Bass can have a threesome.

Fucking morons.

_________________________________

Here is the complete article:

N.C. Church Plans to Burn Bibles, Christian Books

Wed Oct 14, 3:14 pm ET

CANTON, N.C. – A North Carolina pastor says his church plans to burn Bibles and books by Christian authors on Halloween to light a fire under true believers.

Pastor Marc Grizzard told Asheville TV station WLOS that the King James version of the Bible is the only one his small western North Carolina church follows. He says all other versions, such as the Living Bible, are “satanic” and “perversions” of God’s word.

On Halloween night, Grizzard and the 14 members of the Amazing Grace Baptist Church also will burn music and books by Christian authors, such as Billy Graham and Rick Warren.

Telephone calls to the Amazing Grace Baptist Church and Grizzard’s home were not immediately returned Wednesday.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091014/ap_on_re_us/us_odd_halloween_book_burning

A Comic Strip Asks the Ultimate Question

Sometimes we find the most piercing question in the most unlikely places.

From one of my favorite comic strips, “Non Sequitur”, by Wiley. Read the whole strip and look at the question in the last frame:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Indeed, why is “Wisdom” always dispensed so cryptically?

If a picture is worth a thousand words, why bother with the thousands words? If God has something to tell us, why does He do so through the cryptic, mythical, Holy-coded, million word Bible?

Just appear to us, all of us and tell us in ten minutes what you want from us. Ten minutes? Can you spare the time?

Just so you know, in the time it took to write this post, untold numbers of humans have suffered numerous idignities and deaths including rape, beating, starvation, torture, incurable disease, watching their children suffer and die while they are helpless to intervene, just to mention a few.

If it’s worth a mention, untold numbers have also suffered economic loss, lost their homes by foreclosure, flood, mudslide, tsunami or earthquake. Corrupt politicians, business and religious leaders swindle millions. Cruel dictators inflict pain on their subjects for personal gain or just for the fun of it.

None of the suffering is a bit cryptic. God’s proposed solution remain cryptic and subject to a wide range of wild and improvable interpretations by corrupt, deluded and demented religions

But hey, I’m sure you have a plan. And I’m sure millions more will suffer unjustly before it all stops.

Here’s a Great Funny Bible Site.

A short post today.

A fellow Blogger, Steve Wells has a site called “The Skeptics Annotated Bible”, where the Bible is looked at and commented on on a scripture by scripture bases.

He draws some very interesting conclusions.

It’s a hoot on a hat.

http://skepticsannotatedbible.com

Steve also has a Blog, Dwindling in Unbelief,  http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/. More interesting stuff.

Thanks to Steve for linking to isnrblog.

The First Post in the Series, “Dicks in the Bible”: Why Did God Give Man a Foreskin, Only to Require Him to Have it Cut Off?

Did you know that the foreskin is very similar to the skin in a person’s eyelids? In fact, in the rare instances when babies are born without eyelids, doctors will transplant the skin from the foreskin and actually make eyelids.

It works very well, except that the kid is a little cock eyed.

Anyway, good question. It seems that God made circumcision mandatory for Abraham, just before Isaac’s birth.

From the Jehovah’s Witness rag, Insight on the Scriptures, page 469

God said: “This is my covenant that you men will keep . . . Every male of yours must get circumcised.” Every male in Abraham’s household of both his descendants and dependents was included, and so Abraham, his 13-year-old son Ishmael, and all his slaves took upon themselves this “sign of the covenant.” New slaves brought in also had to be circumcised. From then on, any male of the household, slave or free, was to be circumcised the eighth day after birth. Disregard for this divine requirement was punishable by death.—Ge 17:1, 9-14, 23-27.

Those familiar with the Bible will understand all the references to circumcision. Those who are not may join my Church, “The Church of Cool Bad Stuff” and become a dues paying member. As your leader, I will now be referred to as “Your Ass-Holiness”. I will then enlighten you with the truth, but not before the check clears.

By the way, we have an immediate need for several spiritual women to assume missionary positions. Please email your application and a nude picture (for medical purposes only, get your mind out of the gutter) to: isnrblog@yahoo.com. Come on, sisters don’t be shy.

Anyway, back to the subject at “hand”, pun intended. Basically, circumcision is the removal of the prepuce, or foreskin, from the male penis. It is usually done on newborns. The Jews did it when a male child was 8 days old.

There is some evidence that circumcision may have some medical and sanitary benefits. But to the Hebrews, it was likely simply ceremonial because, if you recall from the above quote, the Bible does say that disregard for this divine requirement was punishable by death. One who was uncircumcised, was considered “unclean”, thus one who is circumcised was “clean” and what Hebrew would want to be unclean? You can’t get into Country Clubs, your kids can’t get into the good schools. You know the drill.

 Which brings up the interesting question, how would anyone know? Did they have dick inspections? I have a lot of male friends and unless we go the same club, workout and shower I have no idea who is circumcised and who isn’t. And I reeeaallly don’t care to know.  

Back to Dicks in the Bible: Here is an interesting tidbit from the Watchtower, 3/1/75, page 135:

“It is now known that there are sound physical reasons making the eighth day ideal. Not until the fifth to the seventh day after birth is a normal amount of the blood-clotting element known as “vitamin K” in the baby’s system. Another essential clotting element, prothrombin, seems to be higher on the eighth day than at any other time during a child’s life. Based on this evidence, college physician S. I. McMillen concludes: “The perfect day to perform a circumcision is the eighth day.”—None of These Diseases, pp. 22, 23.”

So of course, the Jo Ho’s jump all over this as evidence that God revealed to the Jews that infants should be circumcised on the eighth day. “How would the Jews know? Only God knew!” So, has modern science provided the deluded with a fresh reason for their faith, that circumcision was divinely prescribed to the Jews?  

From the website: http://www.scribd.com/doc/16168548/Should-Our-Baby-Be-Circumcised,

“Commenting on this, the noted Dr. Alan F. Guttmacher says:

“It is noteworthy that the early Jews, who made many interesting observations in both medicine and hygiene, fixed the operation for the eighth day. This was probably arrived at by trial and error. Not an inconsiderable number of those done before the eighth day probably bled dangerously, while those done on the eighth day rarely bled excessively. Modern medicine has found a possible explanation in Vitamin K. This vitamin . . . contributes to the process of blood-clotting. . . . At birth the level in the baby’s blood is relatively low, and it drops even lower during the first few days of life, since the child cannot manufacture its own Vitamin K until it swallows a healthy supply of germs. The baby’s intestinal tract then begins to produce its own Vitamin K, and the supply gradually rises until it reaches an adequate level when the baby is a week old.”

“Of course, Bible students will dispute one point with Dr. Guttmacher. The “many interesting observations” made by the early Jews, such as the diagnosis and treatment of disease, the importance of clean water, quarantine, the value of frequent washing and bathing, and precautionary measures in the handling of blood, cadavers, wastes, and sexual matters, including circumcision on the eighth day, were not arrived at by “trial and error,” but by divine revelation.”

OK. So. lets say some ancient Hebrew family shits in their front yard. There are flies all over the place, drawn by the shit. They notice that when they walk a distance from the house and shit, the flies go where they shit. So, they make the observation that not only do we not shit near the house, but if we dig a hole and bury it, the flies really go away.

I need God to tell me that?  Other than the fact that I would have to dodge pile of shit each morning, just to get the paper, the whole yard would smell…well, like shit. People, in general, don’t like the smell of shit. This is one of those things you just know.

The same with other “scientific revelations” I eat pork. I get sick. Some people die. We all quit eating pork. I don’t need God to tell me that either.  How many times have you gone to a restaurant and ended up puking your guts out?  When, I am hugging the toilet bowl, cursing raw oysters, I now where I ate them. I ain’t never going back there again…oh, God…bbwwwaahhhhhhh….disgusting.

The ancients were very good at observation, observing the stars, etc. They would quickly learn that the eighth day was the best dick cutting day.

As a side point, the ancient Egyptians, with reportedly no help from the God of the Bible, developed mumification techniques that modern science has yet to decipher. So much for “If it’s advanced science, it must be from God”.

But the real point is, if God told the Hebrews that the foreskin MUST be cut off, why did he put it there in the first place?  And he calls it “unclean” on top of it? Hey, God makes dicks but he can’t make them right? As long as we’re on the subject, He could have given me a little more length, but lets not quibble.

“Oh, it was to test the Hebrews faith”. Yea, well fuck you. Whose faith gets tested when you cut an eight day old kid’s dick with a flint rock? I’ve seen it done. No wonder they do it as an infant. Any older and the kid would likely knife the Rabbi’s dick back.

But back to the point that God could have made the perfect dick. But, nooooo. He choses to instead create a painful ritual in the Old Testiment that was soooo important to the Jews, but in the New Testament, He does away with it! What fucking reason was there for the whole exercise to begin with?

Again, in what universe does this whole scenario make any sense at all?

More “Dicks in the Bible” coming up. By the way, I did get an interesting email from a Sister Nicole. Are those real? I don’t really care, just asking.

Dicks in the Bible, Part 2.

The Jehovah’s Witnesses have a bible story book for kids, with the clever title, “My Book of Bible Stories”. When one of my grandsons was small and I was still a Jo Ho, I thought I would read him a story. So, I got the book out and went to the table of contents to see what he might like.

Here were a few of my choices:

“Giants in the Earth”. Angels come to earth because they are sexually aroused by human women and father children who become wicked giants and kill and generally are wicked.

“What’s “sexually aroused” Grandpa?” I could imagine being asked that, so I moved on.

“A Good Son and a Bad Son”. Cain murders Abel over some vegetable vs. meat thing. I don’t even understand that one. Let’s look further.

“The Great Flood” God drowns 99.99999% of the world’s population and he really isn’t very clear exactly why. They are just generally “wicked”. Drown the bastards. Mmmmn, still not real suitable for a toddler.

“Why did God drown all those people, Grandpa?” How the fuck am I supposed to know? Let’s avoid the question.

Well, moving on, we had the story of Dinah, when she has sex with this uncircumcised guy, so her brothers trick the guy, who, by the way is trying to make it right by marrying her. The brothers end up killing a lot of people, mostly men. In fact the Bible refers to it as a “town”. So, they kill the guys and take their stuff and their women.  Jacob, the father is worried that other nearby towns or here to fore unnamed ne’er do wells might get pissed and retaliates, so they move.

No “Hey, sorry for killing all those guys.” Just a “Yea, we tricked them. We got some really hot women out of the deal”. God, apparently was OK with this.  Again, I don’t get it so I chose not to read the story to my grandson.

The whole sordid tale is in your Bible at Genesis, Chapter 34.

Looking further there were many other stories, rife with sex, death, people turning into salt, the walls of cities crashing and the entire population slaughtered, guys selling their brother into slavery and other unsavory tales.

It occurred to me that the Bible is indeed an unsavory book, full of sex, violence, slaughter and suffering, most of which is caused by, directed by, ordered by or ignored by God.

We watched a Bob the Builder video instead.

But, the point is the Bible is at best “R” rated. At least as far as violence and death. Regarding sex, it approaches an “X” rating.

For examples, we have this titillating tale from Genesis 38:12-19 (ASV):

38:12 And in process of time Shua’s daughter, the wife of Judah, died; and Judah was comforted, and went up unto his sheep-shearers to Timnah, he and his friend Hirah the Adullamite. 38:13 And it was told Tamar, saying, Behold, thy father-in-law goeth up to Timnah to shear his sheep. 38:14 And she put off from her the garments of her widowhood, and covered herself with her veil, and wrapped herself, and sat in the gate of Enaim, which is by the way to Timnah; for she saw that Shelah was grown up, and she was not given unto him to wife. 38:15 When Judah saw her, he thought her to be a harlot; for she had covered her face. 38:16 And he turned unto her by the way, and said, Come, I pray thee, let me come in unto thee: for he knew not that she was his daughter-in-law. And she said, What wilt thou give me, that thou mayest come in unto me? 38:17 And he said, I will send thee a kid of the goats from the flock. And she said, Wilt thou give me a pledge, till thou send it? 38:18 And he said, What pledge shall I give thee? And she said, Thy signet and thy cord, and thy staff that is in thy hand. And he gave them to her, and came in unto her, and she conceived by him. 38:19 And she arose, and went away, and put off her veil from her, and put on the garments of her widowhood. 38:20 And Judah sent the kid of the goats by the hand of his friend the Adullamite, to receive the pledge from the woman’s hand: but he found her not. 38:21 Then he asked the men of her place, saying, Where is the prostitute, that was at Enaim by the wayside? And they said, There hath been no prostitute here. 38:22 And he returned to Judah, and said, I have not found her; and also the men of the place said, There hath been no prostitute here. 38:23 And Judah said, Let her take it to her, lest we be put to shame: behold, I sent this kid, and thou hast not found her.

Basically, Judah, an ancestor of Jesus has sex with his daughter-in-law, Tamar. I have several problems with this. First,  she planned this as when Judah was on the way to shear his sheep she covered herself so He would not recognize her.

Second, He thinks she’s is a prostitute so he decides that he would knock off a piece on the road to the  sheep shearing. Of course, they haggle over price. So, Judah offers her a “kid of the goats”. I am not sure what that is, but hey if it buys you a piece of ass, it must be a good thing. I am not sure I would try that now days. I’m sure you’d get farther with a hundred, but whatever works.

If you read on, she does this for some fucked up Hebrew reason. Really, who the fuck knows why? Apparently God has no problem with this whole scenario.

There are so many things wrong with this, on so many levels from a Biblical and Judeo/Christian viewpoint.  Judah has sex with his daughter-in-law. Judah has sex with someone not his wife. Judah thinks he’s banging a ho.

Tamar has sex with her father-in-law. Tamar has sex with someone not her husband. Tamar pretends to be a  ho.

Personally, I don’t care who anyone fucks. I don’t hold to the Judeo/Christian principals of morality, and apparently Judah didn’t either. But since this Blog is dedictated to ridiculing Bible thumpers, it’s a relevant point. 

God doesn’t seem to give a shit. No problem. So go fuck a harlot. No sweat. Don’t worry about what they say in the New Testament. The Messiah will still come through your lineage. That was apparently a big thing. As a side point, if a thousand years after I die, one of my ancestors is born with wings, a 24 inch dick and can shoot gold coins out of his ass, what do I care? Remember me? I’m fucking dead.

But apparently the “Messiah descending from you” was such a big thing that you would almost have to expect to live again, although the Old Testament says little about it.

Anyway, Judah is still dead, by the way, according to the Bible. I have not seen anything about him coming back to life on CNN, although, he is likely a conservative, and so am I, but still nary a word from Fox.

Bill O’Reilly: “This just in, Judah, the daughter-in-law fucking, sheep shearing ancient Jew of the Bible came back to life today in Jerusalem. He claims to be Jesus ancestor. Lawyers are locked in a heated legal battle over the legal rights to use the cross as a symbol, the phrases, “Jesus H. Christ”, “Christ All Mighty ”, “Jeez”, “Holy Jumping Jesus, King of the Jews” and variation, thereof”

Just like any other crazy Bible shit, it could happen. 

Hey, Judah, Good luck with your cut of the Jesus estate.

The Bible is Wrong

Just putting key search phrases up for the spiders.

This is the right blog to come to if you think the Bible is wrong. Read some of my posts.

The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong.

The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong.

The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong.

The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong.

The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong.

The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong. The Bible is wrong.

A Jehovah’s Witness Rant…

…for no particular reason except that they are deluded morons, they suck so I felt compelled. Hey, it’s my blog, so fuck you if you don’t like it.

Poor, deluded Jo Hos.

A ragtag little band of oddball dissenters, whose founder was clearly an apostate from another church, pop out onto the world scene and DEMAND that people follow THEM…or God will destroy them where they stand.

They have grown to (they claim as they are the only source of the numbers) nearly seven million in number, having to knock on doors to distribute Watchtower literature and to con and suck recruits into their crazy azz religion.

All the while being under the control of delusional men who can’t seem to make up their minds on what “God” requires from year to year so that they have to VOTE on their latest “new lite” from the God they worship, as he only talks to them.

If JWs were honest, they would admit that the ONLY place that anyone will EVER see any glowing reports that “the Watchtower is the only group that is approved by God and the only ones having his blessing”….is in a Watchtower publication. There IS no proof of this anywhere…EXCEPT coming down from the Watchtower presses.

Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19:

“ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.”

Delusional fuck heads.

A Great Blog, “Big Dick’s Place”

You can find Big Dicks Place in my pants or there is another one at http://bigdicksplace.com/.

Funny, irreverent, vulgar, demented, anti-social, sociopathic, in-your-face insults, commentary, articles and other bullshit.

Now, this is some quality blogging.

 

Jehovah’ Witnesses View The Watchtower as Their Final Authority

Let the Witnesses tell it from their own literature:

The Watchtower, 10/1/94, pg 8

“Even as Bible prophecy pointed forward to the Messiah, it also directs us to the close-knit body of anointed Christian Witnesses that now serve as the faithful and discreet slave. It helps us to understand the Word of God. All who want to understand the Bible should appreciate that the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.”

The Watchtower, May 1, 1992, pg. 31:

“Of course, help is needed. It is unlikely that someone who simply reads the Bible without taking advantage of divinely provided aids could discern the light. That is why Jehovah God has provided “the faithful and discreet slave,” foretold at Matthew 24:45-47. Today that “slave” is represented by the Governing Body of Jehovah’s Witnesses.”

Jehovah communicates using the Watchtower. From the Yearbook of Jehovah’s Witnesses 1939 p 85

“It should be expected that the Lord would have a means of communicating to his people on the earth, and he has clearly shown that the magazine called The Watch Tower is used for that purpose”

“Respond to the directions of the organization as you would the voice of God.“( Watchtower 6/15/1957, p. 370)

“Let us now unmistakably identify Jehovah’s channel of communication for our day, that we may continue in his favor. Listen to the inspired answer to the situation, in Matthew 24:45-47 (NW): “Who really is the faithful and discreet slave whom his master appointed over his domestics to give them their food at the proper time? Happy is that slave if his master on arriving finds him doing so. Truly I say to you, He will appoint him over all his belongings.” And has he? Yes, particularly since 1919 has it been true that he has appointed the collective body of the anointed remnant over all the visible interests of the Kingdom. The “slave” then became responsible not only for ministering to the needs of the anointed body members but also for taking on the responsibility of preaching the good news of the established Kingdom to people of all nations. (Matt. 24:14) Such is true not by their determination of it, but because God himself has so directed. “God has set the members in the body, each one of them, just as he pleased,” is the way it is pictured in 1 Corinthians 12:18 (NW). It is vital that we appreciate this fact and respond to the directions of the “slave” as we would to the voice of God, because it is His provision.”

As a JW for 50 years, I was always taught the the Watchtower was the interpretaion of Gods word.

I was always warned against speaking against “the organization, or “the brothers”. It was the same as speaking against God or the Bible.

Deluded assholes.

Biblical Justice: Everybody must get stoned

This is a hilarious post from the Blog “Dwindling in Unbelief” by my cyber friend Steve Wells and reposted here with his permission.

His blog is a hoot and I would encourage all to visit . Here is the link:

 http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com

 (To the tune of Bob Dylan’s “Rainy Day Woman #12 & 35“)

Well, they’ll stone you if you touch the holy things.

Whosoever toucheth the mount shall be surely put to death. Exodus 19:13

They’ll stone you if you take accursed things.

Achan … took of the accursed thing. … And all Israel stoned him with stones, and burned them with fire, after they had stoned them with stones. … So the LORD turned from the fierceness of his anger. Joshua 7:1-26

They’ll stone you if you if you curse or blaspheme.

And he that blasphemeth the name of the LORD, he shall surely be put to death, and all the congregation shall certainly stone him. Leviticus 24:16

They’ll stone you if you’re raped and do not scream.

If a damsel that is a virgin be betrothed unto an husband, and a man find her in the city, and lie with her; Then ye shall bring them both out unto the gate of that city, and ye shall stone them with stones that they die; the damsel, because she cried not, being in the city. Deuteronomy 22:23-24

But I would not feel so all alone. Everybody must get stoned.

---

Well, they’ll stone you if you’re an ox and gore a human.

If an ox gore a man or a woman, that they die: then the ox shall be surely stoned. Exodus 21:28

They’ll stone you if you marry when not a virgin.

If any man take a wife, and go in unto her, and hate her … and say, I took this woman, and when I came to her, I found her not a maid: Then shall the father of the damsel, and her mother, take and bring forth the tokens of the damsel’s virginity unto the elders of the city in the gate: And the damsel’s father shall say … these are the tokens of my daughter’s virginity. And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city. … But if this thing be true, and the tokens of virginity be not found for the damsel: Then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die. Deuteronomy 22:13-21

They’ll stone you if you worship other gods.

If there be found among you … that … hath gone and served other gods, and worshipped them … Then shalt thou … tone them with stones, till they die. Deuteronomy 17:2-5

If thy brother, the son of thy mother, or thy son, or thy daughter, or the wife of thy bosom, or thy friend, which is as thine own soul, entice thee secretly, saying, Let us go and serve other gods, which thou hast not known, thou, nor thy fathers … thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die. Deuteronomy 13:5-10

They’ll stone you if you disobey your Pa.

If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother … Then shall his father and his mother lay hold on him, and bring him out unto the elders of his city … And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard. And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die. Deuteronomy 21:18-21

But I would not feel so all alone. Everybody must get stoned.

---

They’ll stone you if you if you’re a wizard or a witch.

A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them. Leviticus 20:27

They’ll stone you if you give Molech your kids.

Whosoever … giveth any of his seed unto Molech; he shall surely be put to death: the people of the land shall stone him with stones. Leviticus 20:2

They’ll stone you if you if you’re a sabbath breaker.

They found a man that gathered sticks upon the sabbath day. … And the LORD said unto Moses, The man shall be surely put to death: all the congregation shall stone him with stones…. And all the congregation brought him without the camp, and stoned him with stones, and he died; as the LORD commanded Moses. Numbers 15:32-56

They’ll stone you if you curse the dictator.

Thou didst blaspheme God and the king. And then carry him out, and stone him, that he may die. 1 Kings 21:10

But I would not feel so all alone. Everybody must get stoned.

Kudos, Steve. This is some funny shit!!!

Jehovah’ Witnesses and the Year 1914

I had to be out of the Jehovah’s Witnesses for a while to realize how they have been really obsessed with dates. I was born a Witness, in 1951, and all during my life the Armageddon “Sword of Damocles”,  was hanging over my head.  This created such a sense of urgency, fear and expectation that it kept me up at night as a child. Couple that with the threat of the Russians and the Atomic Bomb, (yes, I remember the “Duck and Cover” movies in school) and I had some serious nightmares. Somehow I wasn’t naïve enough to believe that my school desk was an atomic bomb proof device and would shield me from temperatures hotter than the surface of the sun

But as my pre pubescent mind wrestled with all the images these “horrors” can conger up in the fertile mind of an imaginative third grader, apparently it had little real effect on me. I played baseball, hated school and watched TV. Oh, yes I forgot about the Witness part. I was forced to go to meetings on Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday and my Father, Elder Hitler and mother, Sister Two Faced kept me on a tight leash and drilled “the truth” into me. I read the Bible everyday and all the other Jo Ho bullshit literature. I actually liked to read and I liked to read the Bible. Go figure.

For my entire life, the year 1914 was central to Jo Ho doctrine. The history if the derivation of that date is amusing if not downright loony.

In the late 1800′s, Charles Russell, the first Watchtower president, predicted first the year 1874 than the year 1914 as the year when Christ returned and Jesus kingdom would be established on earth.

Coincidentally, WW1 started in 1914, so the Jo Ho’s lay claim to predicting that, which they did not. What they actually predicted was Christ’s return and the restoration of His kingdom in 1914:

“”In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.”

From “The Time is at Hand”, 1902 edition, p. 99. This same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book. I have a copy of the 1908 edition and it says exactly that.

If you look at Jo Ho publications prior to 1914 they focus on Jesus return, Armageddon, where God destroys the non believers and the reestablishment of God’s kingdom. After 1914, they crow about how they said it was a significant year, bending the facts a bit to taking credit for predicting WW1.

“We said that starting in 1914 the world would enter  period of great distress” they say, post 1914, to which I say bullshit. You assholes predicted the opposite, the end of the World and the reestablishment of Christ’s kingdom.

Incidentally, they first “predicted Christ would return in 1874 and then changed it. But back to 1914.

The incredible fact is that Russell actually used the dimensions of the Great Pyramid in Egypt to predict this date.  Russell was a Pyramidologist. Pyramidologists use elaborate measurements to discover hidden codes built into the halls, chambers, and dimensions of the Great Pyramid. They try to link measurement to events in Christianity in an attempt to prove that their idea of what the Bible said was literally true. Pyramidlolgy has historically been practiced by occultists, and misled Christians.

Russell did this. This is further acknowledged in The Watchtower 5/15/56, page 298

“Because none of these theories fully and satisfactorily explain the purpose of building the Great Pyramid, others have developed the hypothesis that it was built under divine inspiration; that perhaps Melchizedek was its builder and that God provided it as a witness in stone to corroborate the Bible. Such men as John Taylor of London, Professor Smyth and Dr. Edgar of Scotland advocated the theory* that the measurements of the Great Pyramid and particularly the measurements of its internal passageways and chambers, were full of Scriptural meaning.”

“Footnote: *Bible Students also held to this thought prior to 1928.”

There are in fact diagrams of the pyramids in Russell’s series of books entitled “Studies in the Scriptures” But in 1928, the new president, Whiskey Joe Rutherford began to distance himself from Russell and the pyramid thing, likely because it was just fucking loony. Like Rutherford and “Beth Salim” was not loony. Google “Beth Salim” for a laugh.

Because the year 1914 had become a center piece in what the Jehovah’s Witnesses taught something had to be done. So at some point, during Rutherford’s tenure, the basis of the year 1914 changed. It’s not clear exactly when.

 “Save 1914!!” was the Jo Ho battle cry. Of course, this was not made public, but I would imagine that there was some scrambling at the Watchtower headquarters.

The basic formula they derived starts with Jerusalem being destroyed in 607 BC, beginning the Gentile Times.  The “gentile times” or the time when God had no representative of his kingdom on earth would run for 2,520 years, from that year. 2,520 years brings us to 1914 (There is no zero year) when Jesus returned invisibly, to reestablish his kingdom in Heaven, soon to come to earth and establish his kingdom here.

How they derive the above is a convoluted, twisty-turney exercise is pounding the square peg in the round hole. Remember, with 1914 ALREADY established as a center piece in Jo Ho theology and Russell’s pyramidology thing looking loonier by the day, the Jo Ho’s needed to fix it and fix it quick.

So the above 1914 math. They gather tidbits from the all over the bible.

Here are some of the key points in Jo Ho “1914” math that make it the joke it is:

Jerusalem destroyed in 607 BC

Secular historians generally accept that Jerusalem as destroyed by the Babylonians in 586 or 587. There is a lot of evidence to suggest that it was. The only evidence that supports the 607 year is from the Bible. And it is not at all conclusive.

2,520 years, the Gentile Times:

The Jo Ho’s say that from 607 there were 2,520 years, called the Gentile Times, before God’s kingdom would be established. Just where do they get this little gem of wisdom, this part of the 1914 equation? From Daniel 7:25:

“And he will speak even words against the Most High, and he will harass continually the holy ones themselves of the Supreme One. And he will intend to change times and law, and they will be given into his hand for a time, and times and half a time”

So, “a time, and times and half a time” equals 3 and a half years. You have to assume that “times” equals 2 times. It just says “times”, plural. More than one. Bible scholars are all over the map on the meaning of this and the “Times of the Gentiles”. It could be 13 times. But for Jo Ho math to work it has to be two times.

Further, for Jo Ho math to work a “time” has to be a year. Again, there is nothing in the Bible that supports that.

A “Prophetic Year”

Perhaps one of the most preposterous elements of Jo Ho 1914 math is the “Prophetic Year”.

The Watchtower 2/1/85, page 11:

“Those Gentile Times were to be seven in number, each corresponding with a prophetic year of 360 days. On the basis of “a day for a year,” all “seven times” would total 2,520 years.”

So, while the rest of the world foolishly thinks of a year as 365 days, the Jo Ho “Prophetic Year” is 360 days. Nowhere in Jo Ho literature is there a logical argument for a “Prophetic Year” being 360 days. They just pull this out of their ass. 

Also, as a side point, they point to the many Bible passages where it mentions “a day for a year” in ref to some sort of prophesy, etc. There is not mention of the “day for a year” in connection with the Gentile Times.

In fact in Psalms 90:4 it says:  “⁴ For a thousand years are in your eyes but as yesterday when it is past,

And as a watch during the night.”

So, fit the above in you loony formula.

Further, the Bible has another time bending formula for you”

2:Peter 3:8 – 10:

⁸ However, let this one fact not be escaping YOUR notice, beloved ones, that one day is with Jehovah as a thousand years and a thousand years as one day. ⁹ Jehovah is not slow respecting his promise, as some people consider slowness, but he is patient with YOU because he does not desire any to be destroyed but desires all to attain to repentance. ¹⁰ Yet Jehovah’s day will come as a thief, in which the heavens will pass away with a hissing noise, but the elements being intensely hot will be dissolved, and earth and the works in it will be discovered.

So, no where does the Bible say that a prophetic year is 360 days, but it does say that a thousand years is like a day.

Most of you are asleep by now, and I think I have made my point.

Jo Ho’s are date obsessed and twist the math to “prove” whatever they need to prove. They claim to have predicted things, likeWW1, when they didn’t and they predict things that never happen. They predict dates based on “voodoo”, those dates become central to their doctrine  and when it becomes apparent that the “voodoo” method is pretty week, they come up with a Bible formula.

Just when did the calculation shift from the measurements of the pyramids to the Bible “jump around” formula?

The real question is why do Jo Ho’s continue to buy the excuses from the Watchtower Society when their “prophesies” blow up in their face?

The square peg fits in the round hole if you hammer it enough.

The Bible Lies

The Bible lies. On second thought, I don’t know if that is an accurate statement.

The Bible is a collective lie, if you define a lie as being untrue. However to say it proactively lies is another thing altogether. That statement implies a vast “biblical conspiracy”, which is possible, but unlikely.

There is an interesting book  The Passover Plot published in 1965 by British Biblical scholar Hugh J. Schonfield.  Schonfield  also published a translation of the New Testament informed with a Jewish perspective.

According to Schonfield’s analysis, the events of the Passover, which are presented in all the Gospels, but inconsistently, are most accurately presented in the Gospel of John. His reading of that Gospel convinced him that John’s account, though probably filtered through an assistant and transcription in John’s old age, suggests that Jesus had planned everything. Among other things, so that he would not be on the cross for more than a few hours before the Sabbath arrived when it was required by law that Jews be taken down, so that one of his supporters, who was on hand, would give him water (to quench his thirst) that was actually laced with a drug to make him unconscious, and so that Joseph of Arimathea, a well-connected supporter, would collect him off the cross while still alive (but appearing dead) so that he could be secretly nursed back to health. Schonfield suggests that the plan went awry because of a soldier’s actions with a spear. Schonfield gives evidence of a high ranking member of the Sanhedrin who was one of Jesus’ followers, likely the Beloved Disciple who is otherwise obscure, and notes several instances in which knowledge of or access to the Temple was available to one or more of Jesus’ followers. He identifies this follower as John, the source of the Gospel many decades later whilst living in Asia Minor. He suggests that this Apostle, and Joseph of Arimathea, were responsible for events following the Crucifixion, and that it might have been this Apostle (an ‘undercover Disciple’, as it were) who was seen (by those who did not know him) at the Tomb on the morning of the Resurrection.

Interesting stuff, to say the least. However, while certainly compelling, Schonfield’s book covers only a small part of the Bible, with its conspiracy theory.

There are so many other issues with the Bible that are improvable, illogical and down right loony.

So, better said the Bible is a book of myths, which are essentially…..well, lies.

Did God write the Bible? Unlikely. Did a group of men, throughout the ages, plan the Bible and write it to mislead mankind, or at least the Christian portion?

Who the hell knows? But that scenario is unlikely to the point of being preposterous .

Still and all, the Bible is bullshit. The Bible lies.

 

Thomas Jefferson was not a Christian

Here are some thoughts on Thomas Jefferson, from “THOMAS JEFFERSON ON CHRISTIANITY & RELIGION”, Compiled by Jim Walker

http://nobeliefs.com/jefferson.htm

In spite of right-wing Christian attempts to rewrite history to make Jefferson into a Christian, little about his philosophy resembles that of Christianity. Although Jefferson in the Declaration of Independence wrote of the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God, there exists nothing in the Declaration about Christianity.

Although Jefferson believed in a Creator, his concept of it resembled that of the god of deism (the term “Nature’s God” used by deists of the time). With his scientific bent, Jefferson sought to organize his thoughts on religion. He rejected the superstitions and mysticism of Christianity and even went so far as to edit the gospels, removing the miracles and mysticism of Jesus (see The Jefferson Bible) leaving only what he deemed the correct moral philosophy of Jesus.

Here are some Jefferson quotes, leaving no doubt about how he felt about Christianity:

Millions of innocent men, women and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined and imprisoned; yet we have not advanced one inch towards uniformity.

-Thomas Jefferson, Notes on Virginia, 1782

---

But it does me no injury for my neighbor to say there are twenty gods or no God. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.

-Thomas Jefferson, Notes on Virginia, 1782

---

What is it men cannot be made to believe!

-Thomas Jefferson to Richard Henry Lee, April 22, 1786. (on the British regarding America, but quoted here for its universal appeal.)

---

Question with boldness even the existence of a god; because if there be one he must approve of the homage of reason more than that of blindfolded fear.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Peter Carr, August 10, 1787

---

Where the preamble declares, that coercion is a departure from the plan of the holy author of our religion, an amendment was proposed by inserting “Jesus Christ,” so that it would read “A departure from the plan of Jesus Christ, the holy author of our religion;” the insertion was rejected by the great majority, in proof that they meant to comprehend, within the mantle of its protection, the Jew and the Gentile, the Christian and Mohammedan, the Hindoo and Infidel of every denomination.

-Thomas Jefferson, Autobiography, in reference to the Virginia Act for Religious Freedom

---

I concur with you strictly in your opinion of the comparative merits of atheism and demonism, and really see nothing but the latter in the being worshipped by many who think themselves Christians.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Richard Price, Jan. 8, 1789 (Richard Price had written to TJ on Oct. 26. about the harm done by religion and wrote “Would not Society be better without Such religions? Is Atheism less pernicious than Demonism?”)

---

I never submitted the whole system of my opinions to the creed of any party of men whatever in religion, in philosophy, in politics, or in anything else where I was capable of thinking for myself. Such an addiction is the last degradation of a free and moral agent.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Francis Hopkinson, March 13, 1789

---

They [the clergy] believe that any portion of power confided to me, will be exerted in opposition to their schemes. And they believe rightly; for I have sworn upon the altar of god, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man. But this is all they have to fear from me: and enough, too, in their opinion.

-Thomas Jefferson to Dr. Benjamin Rush, Sept. 23, 1800

---

Believing with you that religion is a matter which lies solely between man and his God, that he owes account to none other for his faith or his worship, that the legislative powers of government reach actions only, and not opinions, I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that their legislature should ‘make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof,’ thus building a wall of separation between church and State.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Danbury Baptist Association, CT., Jan. 1, 1802

---

History, I believe, furnishes no example of a priest-ridden people maintaining a free civil government. This marks the lowest grade of ignorance of which their civil as well as religious leaders will always avail themselves for their own purposes.

-Thomas Jefferson to Alexander von Humboldt, Dec. 6, 1813.

---

The whole history of these books [the Gospels] is so defective and doubtful that it seems vain to attempt minute enquiry into it: and such tricks have been played with their text, and with the texts of other books relating to them, that we have a right, from that cause, to entertain much doubt what parts of them are genuine. In the New Testament there is internal evidence that parts of it have proceeded from an extraordinary man; and that other parts are of the fabric of very inferior minds. It is as easy to separate those parts, as to pick out diamonds from dunghills.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to John Adams, January 24, 1814

---

Christianity neither is, nor ever was a part of the common law.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Dr. Thomas Cooper, February 10, 1814

---

In every country and in every age, the priest has been hostile to liberty. He is always in alliance with the despot, abetting his abuses in return for protection to his own.

-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Horatio G. Spafford, March 17, 1814

 

Tiger Woods Jokes, and Who’s Fucking Who?

Ok, so now the number of women Tiger Woods has fucked is up to 10. I’m saying He’s probably played all 18 ho’s.  Maybe 36. I wonder what his strokes per hole were?

-This company now is offering a new type of golf clubs and they guarantee you can beat Tiger Woods with them.

-What’s the difference between an SUV and a golf ball? Tiger Woods can drive a golf ball 400 yards

-How could Tiger cheat on his wife?  She is a Swedish model, who is a perfect 19.  That’s a ten with a nine iron.

-Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.

Yuk, yuk, Ha Ha. Laughs at Tigers expense. Let’s all laugh it up. Actually, I have mixed feelings on this whole Tiger thing.

I don’t really care who Tiger fucks. Does it surprise anyone that a young, fabulously rich, good looking guy like Tiger has hot women throwing themselves at his feet? It shouldn’t.

The American public is one big collective asshole. We go nuts over this story, salivating at the next salacious tidbit that may emerge from the throngs of “news” reporters camped as close as they can to Tiger’s house.

“Breaking news!! A blonde woman was taken by ambulance from Tiger Wood’s house this morning!! What could it mean? Who was it? Who could it have been? We’ll tell you as soon as we know!! We’re Action News, on top of the news with all the news you want to know.”

Hey, fuck head, who gives a shit? Leave the guy alone. But the news assholes are empowered by the asshole viewing public, because the American public, in fact, does want to know. Pathetic.

On the other hand, if we hear one word of complaint from Tiger Woods about all this attention, the jokes and sponsors dropping him, I have one thing to say:

You fucked up, jerk off. Don’t be crying to anyone. Who in their right mind would think that nothing would come from having sex with 10 or more women who are not your wife? What were you thinking?

Likely, Tiger is going to have to pay his wife hundreds of his millions of dollars, should she divorce him. Who knows if that is going to happen?  That’s between them. She is the injured party and should do whatever she feels is in the best interest of the children and her. Screw Tiger. He evidently didn’t care how his screwing around would affect his family.

But the real upshot is that the American public is more concerned with Tiger’s shenanigans than with say, Obama’s budget busting, socialist health care plan. Or the obvious fact that the Global Warming assholes and their reigning King, Al Gore are full of shit, manipulating data and trying to force the world into another budget buster, in the name of “saving the planet”.

Gee, I remember in the 1970’s that we were going to have another Ice Age due to man’s polluting the environment. I guess that’s the old “inconvenient truth”.

I like Tiger and he is a great golfer, perhaps the greatest that ever lived. He should still play golf and finish his record breaking career.

Tiger, just fix this and move on.

To everyone else, pay attention to our socialist President and his co-conspirators, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi and the rest of the liberal assholes and stop them from ruining our country.

Don’t worry about who Tiger is fucking. Worry about who is fucking you.

More Loony Bible Bullshit

At the end of this post is the Biblical Creation account from Genesis, from the King James Version of the Bible. You really should read it all, if you are interested in understanding this point. I am going to focus on just a few verses, but it’s there for your reference.

Here’s the thing. Right off the bat, right from the get go, the Bible shoots itself in the foot. Just look at the sequence in Genesis chapter one, describing creation.

Bible believers and non believers are all over the map on this account, to the point of making outrageous and improvable claims.

Now, there is something new. People arguing over the interpretation of the Bible.  Say it ain’t so!

Let me make one slightly off topic observation before I proceed. People like to make the statement that “It would be impossible for God to create the Earth in 7 days!” Really? I would think that a being(s) capable of creating the earth, sun, moon, stars and the rest of the universe could create it as fast as he wanted. What makes it impossible? In the context of the Bible it’s perfectly logical and possible.

Can a 7 foot tall, fur covered alien fly a space ship? Can a space station destroy a planet? Can there exist a “force” in the universe that connects all things? Can a three foot tall, green 800 year old being be a combat master and a pretty agile sword fighter? Can a normal guy make it to 40 and still be a virgin? In the context of the movies, it all makes perfect sense.

The point is, if you’re going to make up fantastic, improvable bullshit, the sky is the limit. So, if you buy that theory that God or some intelligence created all this, the time it took seems kind of irrelevant compared to the feat of creation itself, don’t ‘ya think? Incidentally, personally I have concluded that the universe is a result of intelligent design. I can’t prove it was and you can’t prove it wasn’t. I don’t claim to know how it was done. I don’t have a clue. However, the point of this post is that the Bible’s account of creation makes little sense and when some of these Bible believers get to “explaining” it, the weird shit they come up with makes it even more loony. 

First the “facts”. Not real provable facts, but “What does the Bible actually say”? I am going to focus on the part where God creates light, the sun, moon and stars. Here’s the basic sequence, by day number:                      

1-      Light and the division between day and night – Gen. 1:3 – 5

2-      Expanse, or a division between waters

   beneath the expanse and waters above it – Gen. 1:6 – 8

3-      Dry land; vegetation – Gen. 1:9 – 13                     

4-      Sun, Moon and Stars – Gen. 1:14 – 19

5-      Fish, aquatic animals and flying creatures – Gen. 1:20 – 23

6-      Land animals and man – Gen. 1:24 – 31

7-      God rested

So, notice he creates light first, Day 1 and then the Sun, Moon and stars, Day 4. So the logical question is where did the light come from on Day 1?

Some of the Bible delusionary will say “Well, Genesis 1:1 says “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth”, so the Sun, Moon and Stars are in the Heavens so the light must have come from them.

Then why does Gen. 1:16 say: “And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.”

Here is how Jehovah’s Witnesses and some others reconcile this statement:

From “Insight on the Scriptures”, vol. 1, pages 527-528

“The divine will concerning luminaries was accomplished on Day Four, it being stated: “God proceeded to make the two great luminaries, the greater luminary for dominating the day and the lesser luminary for dominating the night, and also the stars. Thus God put them in the expanse of the heavens to shine upon the earth, and to dominate by day and by night and to make a division between the light and the darkness.” (Ge 1:16-18) In view of the description of these luminaries, the greater luminary was quite apparently the sun and the lesser luminary the moon, though the sun and moon are not specifically named in the Bible until after its account of the Flood of Noah’s day.—Ge 15:12; 37:9.”

“Previously, on the first “day,” the expression “Let light come to be” was used. The Hebrew word there used for “light” is ’ohr, meaning light in a general sense. But on the fourth “day,” the Hebrew word changes to ma·’ohr´, which refers to a luminary or source of light. (Ge 1:14) So, on the first “day” diffused light evidently penetrated the swaddling bands, (the Jo Ho’s teach that there was a big cloud around the earth. That’s where the water for Noah’s flood came from.) but the sources of that light could not have been seen by an earthly observer. Now, on the fourth “day,” things evidently changed.”

“It is also noteworthy that at Genesis 1:16 the Hebrew verb ba·ra’´, meaning “create,” is not used. Instead, the Hebrew verb ‛a·sah´, meaning “make,” is employed. Since the sun, moon, and stars are included in “the heavens” mentioned in Genesis 1:1, they were created long before Day Four. On the fourth day God proceeded to “make” these celestial bodies occupy a new relationship toward earth’s surface and the expanse above it. When it is said, “God put them in the expanse of the heavens to shine upon the earth,” this would indicate that they now became discernible from the surface of the earth, as though they were in the expanse. Also, the luminaries were to “serve as signs and for seasons and for days and years,” thus later providing guidance for man in various ways.—Ge 1:14.”

What? So to summarize the Jo Ho contortion of this:

1-    The Sun, Moon and Stars were already created on Day 4, because vs. 1 says “In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth”. That included the Sun, Moon and Stars. It doesn’t say that, but Jo Ho’s say that.

2-    So when on Day 1, God said “Let there be light”, the “light” that came from the already created Sun, Moon and Stars.

3-    Even thought the Bible says, in vs. 16 that God “made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.” He didn’t really “create” them. He simply moved them. The quote from the above Jo Ho bullshit: “On the fourth day God proceeded to “make” these celestial bodies occupy a new relationship toward earth’s surface and the expanse above it.”

4-    Did he move all the stars, too?

Notice some of the phraseology they use to explain this: “Now, on the fourth “day,” things evidently changed.” So, again Jo Ho’s go beyond what’s written and refer to things that evidently are only evident to them.

Just think and reason for a second on the sequence of things. Vs. 2 says the earth was dark. In vs. 3, God says let there be light. Then He goes on to say let the day be separated from the night. How does that happen? The earth revolves on its axis every 24 hours, close to the Sun for there to be a day and night. But the Jo Ho’s say the Sun was not in position.

So, God made the Earth, Sun, Moon and Stars before vs. 1, and moved the Sun and Moon into position on Day 4. The contention is made that “the Hebrew verb ‛a·sah´, meaning “make,” is employed” not the Hebrew verb ba·ra’´, meaning “create,”. So the difference between make and create is what?

To the Witnesses it means God simply moved the already created Sun and Moon into position.

But look how various Bibles render Gen. 1:16.

The King James Version:

“And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.”

The American Standard Version:

“And God made the two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the stars also”

New American Standard Bible:

“God made the two great lights, the ^(X)greater light to govern the day, and the lesser light to govern the night; He made ^(Y)the stars also.

The  New International Version:

“God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars.”

English Standard Version:

“And God kmade the two great lights—the greater light to rule the day and the lesser light to rule the night—and the stars.”

You would think if somebody other than the Witnesses thought God “moved” the Sun and Moon, they would say “moved” instead of made. Notice that you have to believe a series of “evidently’s” for the Jo Ho version to be correct.

The point is, look at the creation sequence for any Bible you like. It makes no sense. I don’t give a shit that “the Hebrew verb ‛a·sah´, meaning “make,” is employed” not the Hebrew verb ba·ra’´, meaning “create,”. The Jo Ho’s draw the ridicules conclusion that “God proceeded to “make” these celestial bodies occupy a new relationship toward earth’s surface and the expanse above it.” None of the Bibles I have read says that. If that is what it means, than I would expect other Bibles to say “So God moved the Sun and Moon on the Day Four. They all say God “made” the Sun, Moon and Stars on day 4.

But, in the big scheme of things, the Genesis creation account has many inexplicable problems. Read it and see for yourself. The Jo Ho’s and others like to say that the Hebrew means this and that and in order to understand the Bible you have to have the “flavor” of the original language.

Well, ain’t that just great. Since most Christians barely read English, how can “getting the flavor of the original language” be a requirement to understand the Book God wants us all to understand, as it leads to our everlasting salvation? It conveniently allows for and in fact creates the need for a “scholarly” or “clergy” class who we trust. These guys assume leadership and translate the flavor of the original language to us. Even though there are as many interpretations as there are “experts” and “scholars”, all Christians pick their trusted expert and base their remedial understanding of the Bible what their leaders say. Thus Christians create the many organized religions.

Here are a few random loony things Bible assholes throw around. We have the “light year” controversy, where if God created the Earth, Sun, Moon and Stars in 6 days and man has been on the earth for approx. 6,000 years (that has some merit, using Bible chronology), we couldn’t see any stars farther than 6,000 light years away. Now the measurement of light years is pretty solid science and we can see stars that are a million or more light years away. So if God created the stars 6,000 years ago, every night or so, new stars would become visible as their light reached earth.

Since that doesn’t happen, some assholes say that the speed of light must be faster than 186,000 miles per second. Seriously, no bullshit. They have some great speculative scientific theories to back this up…maybe. Honestly, who in the hell knows. But what sense does that make? If new stars appeared every night, wouldn’t that be some very compelling information that might give the Bible’s account some credence? Sure, but hey God, be it He/She/It or Them have proved that it’s really easy to fuck with us. If the universe was a cable TV system, we would be the asshole channel.

God(s) would come home from the office or whatever and gather around the really big screen and laugh their asses off watching the latest crazy ass shit those humans have done.

“Man look how bad we fucked with them when we gave them all those screwed up Holy Books!  Shit, they can’t even read! It was a great idea to make them stupid. Look which human they elected President! What idiots! This is some funny shit. “

“Hey, let’s get some really hot females to screw Tiger Woods. That ought to be good for some laughs! I love it when they fuck and everyone acts all indignant and stuff, when they all do it! They all worry about what the children will think. Shit, after the adult humans get done fucking with the heads of the kids, they can’t think!”

Oh yea, and some other asshole says that six thousand years ago, when God created the Earth, he simply caused the light to reach the Earth so that it looks like light coming from those stars. Those stars are there and their light is coming, but in the meantime we have the fake light from God.

The Bible is full of shit and the more you try to explain it or state what is “evident” the more you look like an asshole. I pick on the fucked up  Jehovah’s Witnesses because that is my life’s experience. All you other religious assholes are…well….assholes too.  

The Creation account from the King James Version of the Bible

Genesis, chapter 1:

¹ In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

²And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness [was] upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

³And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.

⁴And God saw the light, that [it was] good: and God divided the light from the darkness.

⁵And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.

⁶And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.

⁷And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which [were] under the firmament from the waters which [were] above the firmament: and it was so.

⁸And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.

⁹And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry [land] appear: and it was so.

¹⁰And God called the dry [land] Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that [it was] good.

¹¹And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, [and] the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed [is] in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.

¹²And the earth brought forth grass, [and] herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed [was] in itself, after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.

¹³And the evening and the morning were the third day.

¹⁴And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:

¹⁵And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.

¹⁶And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.

¹⁷And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,

¹⁸And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that [it was] good.

¹⁹And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.

²⁰And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl [that] may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.

²¹And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.

²²And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.

²³And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.

²⁴And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.

²⁵And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.

²⁶And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

²⁷So God created man in his [own] image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

²⁸And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

²⁹And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which [is] upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which [is] the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.

³⁰And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein [there is] life, [I have given] every green herb for meat: and it was so.

³¹And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, [it was] very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

The Mayan Calendar, The Year 2012 and The End of the World.

So, here’s the thing.

I am at lunch with my Lawyer, Barry. He’s a great friend and Lawyer, but he is a strange little man. He’s maybe a hair over five feet tall, wears glasses as thick as the bottom of coke bottles and speaks with a German accent, even though he was born and raised in Indiana and his parents never spoke German. Go figure.

So, we get on the subject of the Mayan Calendar thing and Barry starts talking about how his son, Heinrich is kind of freaked out about 2012 and the end of the world.

“How come the Mayan calendar ends in 2012” Heinrich asked Barry the other night. I Imagine that little Heiny no doubt had that wide eyed look of anticipation in his eyes, you know the one the kids get when they ask Dad, the all knowing hero in their eyes, those really important life and death type questions?

 As a side point, while there is a point in a kid’s life when his hero is Dad, he thinks Dad is all knowing, can beat up Superman and is the best Dad in the world. However it has been my observation that Dad’s Hero status dissipates quickly after a few answers like: “Go ask your mother”, “How the hell should I know” and “Jesus Christ, do you have to talk while the (game, CSI, American Idol or my favorite porn video) is on TV?”

I was determined that when I had kids, I would remain their Hero as long as possible. With my Son, surprisingly, I was able to really extend my Hero status in his eyes, simply by being more of a friend than an authority figure and answering questions honestly. He still thinks I am the strongest guy in the world, he tells everybody that I can kick their ass and I read him a story every night before he goes to sleep. 

The problem is that he is now 31 and doing 2 to 5 in the State Pen for beating up two 5 year olds who disagreed with him and throwing them off a bridge. You simply can’t win at this parent thing.

But, back to Barry and Heiny. So, Heinrich is freaked about 2012 and he asks Barry, “How come the Mayan calendar ends in 2012”

So Barry stops for a minute and says, “Maybe they just quit”. We both busted out laughing. Barry about fell out of his booster seat.

So Barry continues “Maybe the guy writing the calendar was at 2012 and his pal runs up to him and says, Hey, Guacamole, let’s go! They’re about to sacrifice those three virgins!  So, Guacamole drops his pen and runs off to see the naked chicks get sacrificed and while he’s gone the Mayan Congress, in a cost cutting measure, eliminates the whole Calendar Department.”

I mean, it was like 1,000 BC and they were 3,000 years into the future. It looked an awful lot like a pork project. I bet they also cut midnight Jai Lai.

So, Barry asks me what I think.

Honestly, I had not paid much attention to the Mayan, 2012, end of the world thing. I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and after they cried wolf by predicting the end of the world seven times in the 20^th Century and here it is 9 years into the 21^st Century, I am a little immune to “end of the world” stuff. Jehovah’s Witness predicted the end of the world in 1914, the end of WW1, 1925, in the 1930’s when they said “Millions Now Living Will Never Die”, 1975, before the 1914 generation died off and before the end of the 20^th Century.

The Mayans ain’t got nothin’ on the Jo Ho’s.

So I said “I don’t have a clue.” Which was true, as I had not actually looked into it. So Barry takes his IPhone and the calendar goes to January, 2013. So, who are you going to trust, the Mayans or Steve Jobs, since the IPhone goes beyond 2012? So we made a few more jokes about the big titted Mayan chicks and moved on to important subjects, like how stupid Obama is.

So, when I got back to my computer, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to do a little research.

Now, you really have to want to know about this Mayan, 2012, End of the World thing, because there is a ton of bullshit you have to wade thru to even begin to understand it.

This whole loony notion, which has a whole of moving parts and as many interpretations as it does interpreters,  references Nostradamus, Hitler, the Egyptians, Hinduism, the Age Of Aquarius, The Masons, tsunamis, Solar Flares, The Biblical Apocalypse, nuclear war, asteroids and Nancy Pelosi, just for starters.  

I’ll summarize as best I can: The Mayan Calendar ends in December of 2012 and a lot of people have a lot of predictions as to what will actually happen. These range from nothing to the total destruction of the universe as we know it.

There are several over the top loony things that stand out even in this crazy ass collection of stupid shit.

For example, The Masons. Who in the fuck are the Masons? I mean I know guys who wear the rings, like my banker and insurance guy. Since neither of these guys could lay a straight line of block or brick (remember, masons work with stone) than just what the hell do these “Masons” do?

Again to summarize: In the Renaissance, masons built the big stone cathedrals of Europe. Word up is that they developed this huge, mysterious, allegedly conspiratorial secret society that still exists today. And surprisingly they called their secret society “The Masons”. Well, there goes one big secret. Early on, everyone knew who they were. If they really wanted to keep it a secret, they could have called it the “Secret Order of Blacksmiths” , “The Cub Scouts” or “Three Dog Night”.

Here’s the masons, in a bar, binge drinking after a long day of Cathedral building. “Hey” says one of them “I know! Let’s form a Secret Society!”

They all mutter in agreement “Let’s call it…the …the…I got it…The Masons! It’ll be our secret! No one will ever guess it’s us masons!”

“Here, Here” They all agree, raising wooden mugs of Grog. “Hey Bob, can you lend me your mason hammer and some mason bricks so I can finish the mason work on the Cathedral. I’m behind schedule and the Cardinal says he’ll marry my seven year old son if I don’t finish on time”

So, you have a bunch of guys, basically brick layers who form this Secret Society. In all fairness, they were a little more skilled than that, but save for a few Cathedrals, bridges etc, there really wasn’t much of a demand for ornate artistic stone work.

But these guys are said to be a perennial society who had some kind of secret knowledge that was so important it had to be passed down to, I guess us or someone at sometime, somewhere….I guess…whatever.  Anyway, to do this they created this body of temples with these cryptic secrets in the stone work. Guess what? We still don’t have a fucking clue what this big secret is. I am beginning to think the big secret was “Hey, let’s really fuck with future assholes by leaving random meaningless clues and starting a rumor that there is this big secret when really there isn’t one and we’re just fucking with them!”

Some putz also says that ancient Free Masons were watching some kind of large pattern or cycle and the Masons are still watching this today. It’s some Galactic alignment cycle that happens every 26,000 years. Putz also says the Masons are linked to history’s grand moments and illustrious traditions, none of which of course he identifies.

Some other Masonic watcher says they are a Secret Society of Builders who were trying to mold the course of Human events. They even planned the founding of the United States. Is was all a Masonic Plot. Along with UFO’s, bigfoot and crop circles. Although I have always thought crop circles were actually big advertisements for Target stores but I have no real proof.

So, a Secret Society of Builders?? Builders?26,000 year galactic alignment cycle?? Builders?? Today, Insurance Guys, Realtors and Bankers? Oh, and a used car salesman? I mean, you have to have some smarts to be a builder, but I find it hard to believe that stone workers during the Renaissance discovered this “knowledge” of the greatest importance and even understood a 26,000 year galactic cycle and the guy I bought my Toyota from is watching for this galactic alignment cycle. Maybe on his big screen on the Sci Fi channel between beers.

But, hey if I wake up one night and some hooded guys in monk outfits, carrying candles are around my bed, I could be wrong here.

Another big link to the Mayan/2012/End of the World Thing is Nostradamus. We all know something about this guy. He wrote cryptic prophesies that some say have come true. Like about Hitler and stuff. Actually, most of his prophesies about disasters are remarkably close to the events of my first marriage, but I digress.

It’s a stretch, akin to believing in religion, in order to believe the Nostradamus thing. For example he refers to a real bad person coming from Germany named Hister.

“Wow” say the Nostra-tards. “This obviously means Hitler”!!

Hey, if old Nostro is so fucking smart, why didn’t he say Hitler? He said Hister. Jesus, the fucking check out girl at 7/11 is smart enough not to take a credit card that says Mr. Hitler, from a guy who’s drivers license says Mr. Hister.

The old woman who lived behind us was from Germany and her real name was Hister. Of course we called her Hitler, which pissed her off, but she did some nasty shit. She was always complaining about something or other and if your ball went in her yard, forget it. That bitch would keep it.  When I formed my first garage band, we couldn’t even practice in my garage because the noise gave her headaches. Bitch.

And I swear she had an oven in her backyard where she burned Jews. Oh, she said it was a “kiln” for pottery, but we knew better. One time this kid, Jerry Rothestein just quit coming around one day. We thought for years that she killed him and burned him in the “kiln”.

Some years later we learned that he and his widowed mother had suddenly moved to Philidelphia where she married a Rabbi. Go figure.

Aside for “Hister”. Nostro talks about  “Mabus”, who many think is really Sadam  Hussien. Now this is plain bullshit. If you rearrange the letters of Mabus, they spell Sadam. Again, if Nostro was so smart, why didn’t he say Sadam? Also, if you rearrange the letters of Mabus, they spell “Baums”. You have Baums Sporting Goods, Baum’s Dance, Baum’s Music, hell there are a lot of Baums. Google Baums.

Also, Baums is pronounced like Bombs..destruction…death…mayhem….all Nostro themes. We could twist this shit all day.

I think the real hidden meaning is in Nostro’s name: Nostra-dumb-ass. Fucking morons.

The upshot is that if people keep saying the world will end, likely at some point someone will be correct. So, do I think the world will end in 2012? I seriously doubt it. Like I’ve said, I lived most of my life as a Jehovah’s Witness and the World was always ending on some date or time frame.

Probably the most relevant writings on the 2012 thing are in this article by Peter Siris in the New York Daily News:

“ If world does not end in ’2012′, planning for retirement gets complicated”

http://ww           w.nydailynews.com/money/investing/2009/12/07/2009-12-07_if_world_does_not_end_in_2012_planning_for_retire2ment_gets_complicated.html#ixzz0ZV9Ri81i

Allow me to point out that many Jehovah’s Witnesses, believing the Watchtower Society’s bullshit about the world ending, paid no attention to retirement. This is the shit the Watchtower Society was spewing:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

“What, you sold your house, quit your job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?” So, now many in their 70’s are working at Burger King.

So, if you believe the world is ending in 2012, quit work, sell your house and party hardy.

Asshole, you’ll get what you deserve, either way.

A Christmas Story

Here is a little known Christmas story from the Bible book of Isnrblog.

Isnrblog 1:69: “And so it was that, as was the custom, religion thrust the holidays upon the helpless and unwitting people. None were spared, from the richest among them to the homeless, foreclosed upon and non credit worthy. “

2 “And the merchant Isnrblog began to lament, “As the holidays approachith, my workers work not, the malls and the market places become choked, traffic is a bitch and the continuous drone of holiday music becomes as when one puts a metal pail over his head and hits it with a hammer”

3 “And Isnrblog implored the workers, “Listen, please to my plea! I have bills to pay! The rent stoppeth not, neither taxes nor the electric bill”

4 “But alas his pleas fell upon deaf ears, “It’s the holidays” saith the workers “so fuck off!”

5 “So Isnrblog became dejected and his countenance became as a man who gave Bernie Maddoff his entire fortune.”

6 “But Isnrblog’s lament was heard and God took pity on the poor bastard. And God appeared to him and sayith “Look, Isnrblog, here I am with a gift for you, a case of Crown Royal. Now, you may slumber in a drunken stupor until the scourge of the holidays are over!”

7 “Cool!, saith Isnrblog. And so it went, Isnrblog went on a binge drunk with the God given nectar.”

8 “And his workers, upon seeing this proceeded to say among themselves, “I seems our master Isnrblog is seriously shit faced. See, God has provided us with the gift of opportunity. Let us become like the thief in the night, ransack his office and steal everything of value.”

9 “So, in the spirit of the Holidays the workers of Isnrblog made off with all his valuable stuff, including his Tiger Woods porno CD”

10 “And God proceed to pronounce Isnrblog a poor, drunken, dumb, bastard”.

11 “But Isnrblog was aroused from his drunken slumber by an incessant and loud pounding on his door. Stumbling to the door, he opened it and saith, Whaaa ddyaa want?”

12 “The man at the door was a man of legal authority, and he sayith unto Isnrblog “For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace. And he looks just like you”

13 “So? saith Isnrblog. The man of authority proceeded to hand Isnrblog a scroll of great importance.

14 “It’s a summons” saith the man of authority. “Remember Mary, the temp you hired last Summer? She filed a paternity suit”

15 “Shit!” sayith Isnrblog.

16 Looking on from Heaven, God smiled and sayith “Merry Christmas, you poor drunk bastard”

The Bible is Wrong

Look at some of my previous posts for details.

Jehovah’s Witnesses Revise Their Own History.

The Watchtower, 1955, pages 296-297

“The years 1919-1922 proved to be years of new organizational building for Jehovah’s anointed remnant. The Watch Tower Society decided for the first time to do all its own printing, even the printing of bound Bible study books. Factory space was engaged on Myrtle Avenue, Brooklyn, New York, and large printing equipment was installed for such independent operations. Additional volunteers were brought in to Bethel, making a total of 107 full-time workers to undertake the production of better and more and cheaper publications. The Watch Tower for February 1, 1920, was this journal’s first issue to be printed on the Society’s own press. In 1920 thirty-eight carloads of paper were used in producing four million copies of the new magazine, The Golden Age, not counting much other printing accomplished that year. The campaign with the new book Millions Now Living Will Never Die! was vigorously carried on at this time, necessitating the printing and distribution of large quantities of copies of it. On this same subject public lectures, together with much newspaper advertising, were conducted the world over. In fact the campaign was so impressive that the title itself is still a byword among many in America and Europe to this day.”

First, let me say a hardy “fuck you in the ass” to all Jehovah’s Witnesses who read this and say “Ha Ha. You quote this old (1955) publication!” It seems when you quote some of their older publications, the Jo Ho jerk-asses brush it off as somehow irrelevant.  However their whole present day organization is based on incidents they claim happened in the early 1900’s, specifically 1919:

The Watchtower 5/1/93, page 17:

“From the time Christ’s presence began and down to 1918, the slave class, despite unpopularity, persecution, and even some confusion, had been seeking to give timely food to the domestics. This is what the Master found when his inspection began. The Lord Jesus was pleased, and in 1919 he pronounced that faithful approved slave class happy. What was the slave’s delightful reward for doing what his Master had appointed him to do? A promotion! Yes, larger responsibilities were given in advancing his Master’s interests. Since the Master was now a heavenly King, why, then, his earthly belongings became even more precious.”

Presently, the Watchtower Society calls itself the “faithful and discrete slave”, as it has since 1919 when it claims that Jesus gave then that title. They highjack this title from Matthew 24:45-47 (NWT):

⁴⁵ “Who really is the faithful and discreet slave whom his master appointed over his domestics, to give them their food at the proper time? ⁴⁶ Happy is that slave if his master on arriving finds him doing so. ⁴⁷ Truly I say to YOU, He will appoint him over all his belongings.

The fact that I quote from an older Watchtower, 1955 should not be summarily dismissed because of its age. If 1919 is relative so is 1955.

The point here is that Watchtower literature refers hundreds of times to the “Millions Now Living Will Never Die” series of lectures, campaigns, books and pamphlets with this title. The “Millions Now Living Will Never Die” was the brainchild of the then President of the Watchtower Society, Judge Joseph Rutherford, or “Whiskey Joe, as he was affectionately known.

Well, today, in Jan of 2010, is it likely that millions of people living in the 1920’s will and/or would never die? Were/are the Jehovah’s Witnesses correct? Perhaps, if it wasn’t for a few minor details.

For one, The Jehovah’s Witnesses believe that only Jehovah’s Witnesses will survive God’s global carnage, called Armageddon:

Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19:

“ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.”

So for the preposterous claim of the 1920’s that “Millions Now Living Will Never Die”, over two million Jehovah’s Witnesses (remember “millions”, more than one), who were alive in the 1920’s would have to be alive today. So, since there are approximately 6 million Jehovah’s Witness today, 2 million of them would have to be 80 years old or older. That’s 1 in 3.

I can tell you from experience, that ain’t the case.

So, then, again Jehovah’s Witnesses shoo themselves in the foot, with another loony prophetic brain fart that obviously did not happen.

But, never underestimate the Jo Ho’s. As they have done many times in the past, they simply rewrite their own history.

The February 2010 Watchtower, page 15, paragraph 8 says that a talk given at the Cedar Point, Ohio, convention in 1922 was entitled “Millions Now Living MAY Never Die”.

“MAY”??? Sorry, you hypocritical liars. You said “WILL NEVER DIE”. Now they are saying that they said “MAY” never die.

Interestingly, this fact slips by the deluded flock and they lap it up like a dog does its own puke. Soon, as time progresses, it will become “May Never Die”.

“What, we weren’t wrong. We said MAY never die. You’re twisting our words, you Satanic Apostate!”

Yea, me and Satan.  So, guys, how do you plan to get rid of all those pesky CD’s, bound volumes of the Watchtower that prove you are and have been consistently full of shit?

Assholes.

Pat Robertson Continues to be a Fucking Asshole

On his Christian Broadcasting Network show Wednesday (1/13/09), Rev. Pat Robertson said that the nation of Haiti has been devastated by a large earthquake because its people “made a pact with the devil.”

“Something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about it,” Robertson said. “They were under the heel of the French … and they got together and swore a pact to the devil. They said, ‘We will serve you if you’ll get us free from the French.’”

“True story,” he continued. “And the devil said, ‘OK, it’s a deal.’ Ever since, they have been cursed by one thing after another.”

Gee, what a surprise. Robertson is infamous for such inflammatory statements. If you recall Jerry Falwel (is he still dead?) and Pat agreed that the 9/11 attacks on the world trade center was punishment for the United States allowing abortion, and gays and something to do with the ACLU.  He and Falwel have said a number of equally boneheaded things about how God feels about things, how God is punishing us and how God wants us to act.

Notably, Falwel did not comment on the Haiti thing because, well ….Falwel is DEAD!

Hey, Jerry, where the fuck was God on that one? He let your sorry ass DIE??? I hope it hurt asshole.

Anyway, the point is again as it always is: religious assholes make fucking stupid, outrageous comments about stuff because God is their special friend and they have a special line of communications with him and, of course, it is their job to inform the rest of us, the unwashed, uninformed masses, of what God thinks.

Well, thanks for that, Pat you demented, senile old fart. I wonder if Pat can still get it up? Probably, with Viagra and all that. I’m just saying, does Pat get laid? Maybe that would stop him from making such absurd comments.

Let’s get some Haitian chick to really rock his world.

At any rate, I had to comment on this, but I can’t make it any funnier or ridicules than it already is.

You just can’t make this stupid religious shit up.

Still More Bible Bullshit

From the Bible book of Galatians, Chap 1, verses 8 & 9:

 ”But even though we or an angel from heaven should preach to you a Gospel contrary to that which we have preached to you, let him be accursed. As we have said before, so I say again now, if any man is preaching to you a gospel contrary to that which you received, let him be accursed.”

What???

Some back ground is in order here. The Apostle Paul, who allegedly wrote the book of Galatians, is here telling the Galatians, (the Christian congregation at Galatia), in a letter to them, saying that if we or anyone else, even a supernatural guy, tells you different than we just told you, they’re wrong and should be accursed.

So, how fucked up this is.

At first, Paul opposed the Christians. In the Bible he hunted them down and persecuted them. He even presided over the execution of some Christians. He was big time into killing them. In addition he was a Pharisee and was likely from a prominent family. If you want to know what a Pharisee is, look it up. Christ, who am I, the answer man? He was a big shot Jew, OK?

 So one day, Paul is walking down this road on his way to or from persecuting Christians, which did with great gusto, and Jesus appears to him, in a very bright light and asks him why he is persecuting Christians. Oh yea, Christ has already been killed, crucified, hung on a stake, cross, billboard, whatever. So, Christ appears to him in supernatural form, in quite an impressive way evidently.

So, now, Paul is blinded temporarily and as a result becomes a Christian. Now, initially he is viewed with a great deal of suspicion by the Christians, whom he tries to buddy up with.

“Hey, guys, I know I killed your uncle but I am a changed man!! Jesus appeared to me!! I swear to God”

“Yea, right”.

I would have slit his fucking, Christian killin’ throat, but eventually he convinced the Christians he was on the level and he then became a big shot Christian. To top it off, he ends up writing a lot of letters to different Christians that eventually become part of the Bible. That is, among the writings that are ACCEPTED as ones that should be in the Bible. There are many more excluded contemporary writings which leads to the obvious question:  Who The Fuck Makes The Call As To Which Books Belong In The Bible?…and the obvious answer: No One Fucking Knows.

Again, who am I, the answer man? Look it up for yourself, you lazy fuck!.

The point is Paul experienced a supernatural experience the likes of which would certainly make me first, soil my under-oos and secondly create a very strong motivation on my part to do WHATEVER THE SUPERNATURAL GUY/THING/BEING TOLD ME!

Here’s me, walking down a country road. That would be very unusual because I live in a city but just go with me on this. Suddenly, I am blinded by the sudden appearance of a huge, supernatural being!!

My first thought? “Please don’t kill me!!” Once I have determined that the being has chosen to allow me to live, I am pretty much open to any suggestion, instruction, order at all he tells me.

Unless he tells me to support Obama and I will know right away it is a left wing, pinko, bedwetting liberal trick. Asshole Democrats!! They’ll try anything!

But, if this Being told me to be Catholic, Muslim, Gay, dress like a woman, marry a goat, I am now pretty inclined to do just that.

So, if this being said “Hey, you know what Paul said in the Bible at Galatians 1: 8 & 9? Well, he’s full of shit!! Hitler is the real Messiah! Believe in him!!

Seig Heil, mother fucker.

So, Paul, who converted to Christianity after having a supernatural experience, says that if YOU have a supernatural experience and an angel or some other super guy tells you something different than what HIS supernatural guy said, yours is full of shit and is accursed.

In what fucking universe does that make a damn lick of sense?

Obama, the New “Job’s” President. Fucking Asshole

This post is a departure from my normal religious bashing.

So, here’s Obama dithering for a whole fucking year on a socialized medicine program that the majority of Americans DON”T WANT. Oh, and yea he did spend some time on a carbon footprint bill based on the Al Gore man-made global warming lie. And he went to Copenhagen for a conference with other deluded socialist, pinko, commie, bedwetting fuckheads who want to economically bomb all the developing countries back to the Stone Age by taxing the shit out of us.

He also did some other irrelevant shit, like try to get the Olympics for Chicago and was soundly rebuffed and embarrassed when the Olympic Committee told him to fuck off.

Obama: “OK, I’ll go PERSONALLY to Copenhagen! I’ll get Chicago the Olympics!”

Incidentally, he’s gone there a lot lately. I bet he’s got some Danish poon-tang on the line. “Oh, darn Michelle, I’ve got to go to that darn old Copenhagen again. Some conference about fish or something.” A page out of the Tiger Woods sex play book.

Anyway, whatever magic his presence was intended to bring to the Olympic negotiations fizzled and Obama left town with his tail between his legs. Good play, Mr. President. It’s good to know you bring such dominant influence to the table in your international dealings. Maybe you should have bowed to the Olympic Committee, like you did to that camel fucking Saudi Prince.

We Americans are so proud!

Anyway, Obama’s latest kick in the nuts was when Scott Brown won Teddy “I’ll fuck anything” Kennedy’s Senate seat in Massachusetts.  Of course this was after a string of losses including the New Jersey and Virginia’s Governors races.

Brown ran as the “41^st Senator”. Gee, Obama what in the fuck  did he mean by that? He ran as the guy that was going to fuck up your super majority in the Senate. He won. Your Senate is no longer filibuster proof. Did you learn anything from that? Evidently not.

He also made the point that what the hell were you doing fucking with health care when America wanted jobs, the economy fixed and terrorists killed.

But you know what, Mr. President, He won and You lost. No, the same force that swept you into power was not the same force that swept him to victory. It was the opposite force. That force that swept you into power no longer exists.

I remember when, again you thought your simple presence would clinch the election for the Democrats, so you made a big speech for Coakly.

“Anyone can buy a truck” you said, mocking Scott Brown. While you laughed the rest of America watching you all said “Not if you don’t have a fucking job, you moron!”

So, your State of the Union Address was just an extension of your out of touch, it’s all about Obama, “Yes we can” bullshit. You went a little populist on us with jobs and tax cuts for small businesses. But you know what? In this economy that you have failed to fix, in the real business world, breaking even IS THE NEW SUCCESS! You have to make a profit and incur a tax liability before a tax break does you any good, you idiot.

In closing I look forward to 2010, when the Dems get slammed and 2012 when you become the first black one term President.

You need a Carter to get a Reagan. I wonder what great President we’ll get after an “Obama”?

Still More Bible Bullshit

So, its like this. According to the Bible, no man has ever seen God:

John 1:18: “No man has seen God at any time; the only-begotten god who is in the bosom [position] with the Father is the one that has explained him.” From the New World Translation

John 1:18: “No man hath seen God at any time; the only begotten Son, which is in the bosom of the Father, he hath declared [him].” From the King James Version of the Bible

…but Jacob saw God, face to face:

Genesis 32:30: “³⁰ Hence Jacob called the name of the place Pe·ni´el, because, to quote him, “I have seen God face to face and yet my soul was delivered.” From the New World Translation

Genesis 32:30:  “³⁰And Jacob called the name of the place Peniel: for I have seen God face to face, and my life is preserved.”  From the King James Version of the Bible.

…….but you can’t see God’s face and live:

Exodus 33: 17-20: “¹⁷ And Jehovah went on to say to Moses: “This thing, too, of which you have spoken, I shall do, because you have found favor in my eyes and I know you by name.” ¹⁸ At this he said: “Cause me to see, please, your glory.” ¹⁹ But he said: “I myself shall cause all my goodness to pass before your face, and I will declare the name of Jehovah before you; and I will favor the one whom I may favor, and I will show mercy to the one to whom I may show mercy.” ²⁰ And he added: “You are not able to see my face, because no man may see me and yet live.” From The New World Translation

Exodus 33:17-20: “¹⁷And the LORD said unto Moses, I will do this thing also that thou hast spoken: for thou hast found grace in my sight, and I know thee by name.¹⁸And he said, I beseech thee, shew me thy glory. And he said, I will make all my goodness pass before thee, and I will proclaim the name of the LORD before thee; and will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will shew mercy on whom I will shew mercy. And he said, Thou canst not see my face: for there shall no man see me, and live.”  From the King James Version of the Bible.

So, which is it? Can you see God and live or not? It says Jacob did, “I have seen God face to face” he says. But God tells Moses in Exodus “canst not see my face: for there shall no man see me, and live” “Canst??” Hey, I do not make this shit up.

Well, it seems that the Bible isn’t all it seems and steps on its dick again in a glaring contradiction.

“Oh, but wait,  “The Bible is not Bullshit Brigade” shrieks, hang on there a minute cowboy, all round anti-Christ, denier of the obviously wrong and our almighty invisible friend. It LOOKS like the Bible is contradicting itself, but you don’t have all the facts. Ya’ see, to get the real flavor and meaning of what the Bible REALLY says, you have to go to the original languages it was written in, Hebrew and Greek.”

I know I don’t and I am pretty sure that the vast majority of Christians do not speak modern Hebrew and/or Greek, none the less understand the ancient languages which are, by the way, very different. So, if you go to school and study say Classical Greek, that is not the Greek the Bible was originally written in.

To explain to you the point I am trying to make, lets look at this gem from the Watchtower magazine of 6/15/01, page 31, in a section they call “Questions From Readers”

The questions is asked “Why does the New World Translation at 2 Peter 3:13 speak of “new heavens [plural] and a new earth,” whereas Revelation 21:1 foretells “a new heaven [singular] and a new earth”?”

So, basically why does Peter talk of a plural “heavens and earth” and Revelation talks about a singular “heaven and earth”

The answer from the Watchtower:

“This is basically a grammatical detail involving the original languages. It does not seem to have any special significance as far as the meaning is concerned.”

So, one is singular and one is plural but the Jo Hos and other Bible Scholars say: “It does not seem to have any special significance as far as the meaning is concerned.” Oh yea, because its “a grammatical detail involving the original languages”.

So the Jo Ho’s also say that to get the real flavor and meaning of what the Bible REALLY says, you have to go to the original languages it was written in, Hebrew and Greek. Well, again most of us do not understand these languages.

This presents two serious problems. Oh, not to me, as I don’t believe the Bible, so I don’t give a shit. Rather, to you Bible assholes, these are major issues or they should be. Likely though you’ll dismiss my points.

“Oh, he swears. He couldn’t possibly right.” Let me just say fuck you in advance.

The first of these two problems is that an ordinary, everyday person today cannot possibly understand the Bible on his own, as written in English. The second problem is that now the ordinary, everyday person has to depend on “scholars” who do understand the ancient languages.  And guess what? There are countless disagreements among these Bible scholars over what the Bible means!! What is an ordinary, everyday person to do? More on this later.

Here is what the Bible says concerning itself and the ordinary, everyday person:

Acts 4:13:

“Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marvelled; and they took knowledge of them, that they had been with Jesus.” KJV

What? “Unlearned and ignorant”?? Most of the Apostles were tradesmen, fishermen, ect. Paul was actually a very educated man, but for the most part they weren’t scholars.

Further, the Bible says, in 1 Corinthians 1: 27 – 31:

“²⁷But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;

²⁸And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, [yea], and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are:

²⁹That no flesh should glory in his presence.

³⁰But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption:

³¹That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord. KJV

So, basically God chose the ordinary, everyday persons to “reveal his truth to”. But according to the Rabid Religious, to get the real flavor and meaning of what the Bible REALLY says, you have to go to the original languages it was written in, Hebrew and Greek. It’s not just Jehovah’s Witnesses that say that. All Christian religions do.

Well, whoopty fucking do! Virtually none of us are Biblical Hebrew and Greek scholars. So, Bible fuck up number one on this point: if God chose the dumbasses, than being a Biblical Hebrew and/or Greek scholar is mutually exclusive.  Hey no problem for the early Christians. The first ones were Jews and likely spoke Hebrew and common Greek of the day. In all fairness there are many Biblical Hebrew and/or Greek scholars who believe the Bible.

However, if the Bible is a universal book, that has the real and only message of salvation, than the English speaking world is basically fucked. Or rather, the non Biblical Hebrew and/or Greek speaking world is basically fucked.

“Oh” The Bombastic Bible Buzz Killers will say “We have many Biblical Hebrew and/or Greek scholars today who can tell us the true, real meaning of the Bible!” Again, there are and there is as many interpretations of the Bible as there are Biblical Hebrew and/or Greek scholars

So, Bible fuck up number two: Choose your scholar(s) that you want to believe. These highly educated guys who, their whole lives study Biblical Hebrew and/or Greek still disagree on many Biblical points.

Oh every religion has one, two or several or quotes any particular one that supports their belief. Read the Bible in English, choose your belief and find a scholar that agrees with you.

This situation creates even more problems, not the least of which is a learned, clergy class which uncontrolled, suppresses, exploits and persecutes society at its whim, as we have seen many times in history, the Catholic Church in the Dark and Middle Ages being a glaring example.

So, basically, God does not have the ability, it would appear, to see to it that his Book of Salvation is available to the masses in a form they can understand. As we have seen, the Bible says you can’t see the face of God and yet says Jacob saw the face of God.

To an English speaking person, the Bible contradicts itself, so it is not likely from God. What about some hick in the West Virginia mountains reading the Bible in, say 1750. There weren’t exactly Bible scholars falling out of the trees then.  Do you think that a reasonably smart person would conclude that the Bible was full of shit?

In fact, the guy was likely illiterate, which brings up still another Bible Bullshit point. Why does God choose to communicate with us via the written word, when a third of the worlds adult population can’t read? Is God aware of this fact? Ya think?? 

You know what? I don’t give a shit if the ancient languages make all these statements somehow agree. I also don’t think it logical that God would create a situation where the ordinary man would have to choose among competing scholarly interpretations to get his “salvation”.

So, again the Bible itself proves it’s own irrelevance.

So, what is an ordinary, everyday person to do? Fuck it. Have a beer.

Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit

Here’s today’s episode of “Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit”.

This is like shooting fish in a barrel. If you have read some of my previous posts, you can see from their own literature the Jo Ho’s hang themselves.

I’ll throw in just two of many examples where the Jehovah’s Witnesses have prophesied falsely:

They said this in 1971:

”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

It’s pretty obvious that this didn’t happen. False prophesy.

Also, they said that Armageddon would come within the life span of the 1914 generation, or the generation Jesus spoke of at Matthew 24:34, 35: “Truly I say to you that this generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur. Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will by no means pass away.”

The Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

Well, they have now changed their definition of the “generation” so this too is a false prophesy.

The fact that they prophesy and not one of their prophesies cam true, is not lost on the Jo Ho’s. Here is them, weaseling out of being labeled false prophesies:

The Watchtower, November 1, 1972:

“Does this admission of making mistakes stamp them [Watchtower] as false prophets? Not at all, for false prophets do not admit to making mistakes.”

So, simply by admitting that they made a mistake about saying in 1971, “the battle in the day of Jehovah” happening “Shortly, within our twentieth century”, that doesn’t make them false prophets.

“OK, we admit it. We were wrong about this. But by this, admission, we’re not false prophets”

What???

You predict something, it doesn’t happen but if you admit you were wrong, it’s OK, you’re not false prophets??? What would be your alternative, insisting you were right? The Watchtower Society, The Governing Body, Jehovah’s Witnesses were wrong.

As a Witness for 50 years, I can tell you that I made many decisions that affected my life negatively, in the long term, based on the Watchtower Society’s false predictions, specifically the two mentioned above.  Why would any sane person, any present Jehovah’s Witness continue to put faith in the Watchtower Society if they have a history of being 100% wrong? What about today, right now. If you are a Witness, anything you are taught is subject to change.

To understand this further, you have to understand how the Witnesses portray themselves:

The Watchtower, 10/1/94, pg 8

“Even as Bible prophecy pointed forward to the Messiah, it also directs us to the close-knit body of anointed Christian Witnesses that now serve as the faithful and discreet slave. It helps us to understand the Word of God. All who want to understand the Bible should appreciate that the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.—John 6:68.”

You can only understand the Bible and thus what God wants you to do through them

But while through The Watchtower, the main publication of the Jo Ho’s, they wiggle worm out of their own lies and disastrous predictions and false prophesies, they don’t cut any of you other false religions any breaks what so ever. In the Watchtower below,  they vilify their favorite whipping boy, the Catholic Church:

The Watchtower, 2/1/90, page 14

“An example of such glorification is that of the papacy of Rome. An ecclesiastical dictionary by Lucio Ferraris, published in Italy, describes the pope as “of such dignity and highness that he is not simply a man but, as it were, God, and the Vicar of God.” His crown is a triple crown “as king of heaven, of earth and of hell.” The same dictionary continues: “The pope is, as it were, God on earth, the only prince of the faithful of Christ, the greatest king of all kings.” It adds: “The pope can sometimes counteract the divine law.” Also, The New Catholic Dictionary states of the pope: “His ambassadors have precedence over other members of the diplomatic body.”

“Is this appraisal of the clergy class too strong? We can determine this by applying the rule that Jesus gave to identify false prophets: “By their fruits you will recognize them.” (Matthew 7:15, 16) What, then, has been the fruitage of the clergy over the centuries and in our own 20th century? What will be the fate of this man of lawlessness, and who will share that fate? What responsibility do those who truly fear God have in regard to this lawless one?”

Its clear that here they are call the Catholics false prophets. Interestingly, they say “By their fruits you will recognize them.” meaning what?  Well, if they prophesy something and it doesn’t happen, they’re false prophets.

But, as they often do, Jehovah’s Witnesses hang themselves with their own writings. The following is from their magazine the Awake, of 3/22/93, pages 3 – 4:

“Does the failure of such predictions to come true convict as false prophets those who made them, within the meaning of Deuteronomy 18:20-22? That text reads: “The prophet who presumes to speak in my name a word that I have not commanded him to speak or who speaks in the name of other gods, that prophet must die. And in case you should say in your heart: ‘How shall we know the word that Jehovah has not spoken?’ when the prophet speaks in the name of Jehovah and the word does not occur or come true, that is the word that Jehovah did not speak.”

“There are some who make spectacular predictions of the world’s end to grab attention and a following, but others are sincerely convinced that their proclamations are true. They are voicing expectations based on their own interpretation of some scripture text or physical event. They do not claim that their predictions are direct revelations from Jehovah and that in this sense they are prophesying in Jehovah’s name. Hence, in such cases, when their words do not come true, they should not be viewed as false prophets such as those warned against at Deuteronomy 18:20-22. In their human fallibility, they misinterpreted matters.”

This is all the stuff they do. The prophesied that Armageddon would come in seven distinct periods in the 20^th Century and it didn’t. Yet, the vilify other religions who do the same thing. In fact, I don’t think the Catholics predicted Armageddon would come at all in the 20^th Century.

Don’t get me wrong. The Catholics are just as full of shit as any religion. They all call each other false prophets, instruments of Satan, blah, blah, blah.

My favorite loony religion to pick on are Jehovah’s Witnesses, as they are my experience.

But to all you budding prophets out there, remember what The Watchtower of November 1, 1972 says:

“Does this admission of making mistakes stamp them [Watchtower] as false prophets? Not at all, for false prophets do not admit to making mistakes.”

So just make any prediction, if it doesn’t happen, no problem. Just admit you were wrong.

On that note, I predict I will drink a six pack of Corona this afternoon. I could be wrong. It could be a twelve pack.

More Jehovah’ Witness Bullshit

The Jehovah’s Witnesses have a book called “My Book of Bible Stories”. When one of my grandsons was small and I was still a Jo Ho, I thought I would read him a story. So, I got the book out and went to the table of contents to see what he might like.

Here were a few of my choices:

“Giants in the Earth”. Angels come to earth because they are sexually aroused by human women and father children who become wicked giants and kill and generally are wicked.

“What’s “sexually aroused” Grandpa?” I could imagine being asked. So I moved on.

“A Good Son and a Bad Son”. Cain murders Abel over some vegetable vs. meat thing. I don’t even understand it. Let’s look further.

“The Great Flood” God drowns 99.99999% of the world’s population and he really isn’t very clear exactly why. They are just generally “wicked”. Drown the bastards. Mmmmn, still not real suitable for a toddler.

Well, we had, the story of Dinah, when she has sex with this uncircumcised guy, so her brothers trick the guy, who, by the way is trying to make it right. The brothers end up killing a lot of people, mostly men. In fact the Bible refers to it as a “town”. So, they kill the guys and take their stuff and their women.  Jacob, the father is worried that other nearby cities might get pissed and retaliates so they move.

No mention of murdering guys and taking their stuff.  Again. I don’t get it so I chose not to read the story to my grandson.

Looking further there were many other stories, rife with sex, death, people turning into salt, the walls of cities crashing and the entire population slaughtered, guys selling their brother into slavery and other unsavory tales.

It occurred to me that the Bible is indeed and unsavory book, full of sex, violence, slaughter and suffering.

We watched a Bob the Builder video instead.

But, the point is the Bible is at best “R” rated. At least as far as violence and death. Regarding sex, it approaches an “X” rating.

More Bible Bullshit

From the Bible, Genesis chapter 6:

“6 Now it came about that when men started to grow in numbers on the surface of the ground and daughters were born to them, ² then the sons of the [true] God began to notice the daughters of men, that they were good-looking; and they went taking wives for themselves, namely, all whom they chose. ³ After that Jehovah said: “My spirit shall not act toward man indefinitely in that he is also flesh. Accordingly his days shall amount to a hundred and twenty years.”

^“4 The Neph´i·lim proved to be in the earth in those days, and also after that, when the sons of the [true] God continued to have relations with the daughters of men and they bore sons to them, they were the mighty ones who were of old, the men of fame.”

From the New World Translation of the Bible.

OK, so here’s the deal, angels in heaven began to notice hot chicks on the earth. So “the sons of the [true] God continued to have relations with the daughters of men” and they fathered the “Neph´i·lim”.

There are so many things wrong with this picture. It raises so many questions.

For example Jesus said in Matthew 22:30:

^“30 for in the resurrection neither do men marry nor are women given in marriage, but are as angels in heaven.”

But Genesis says different. The Jo Ho’s try to reconcile these points by saying that

From the Jehovah’s Witness publication, Insight on the Scriptures, Vol. 2, page 997:

“But this does not say that such angelic creatures could not materialize human forms and enter marriage relations with human women. It should be noted that Jude’s reference to angels as not keeping their original position and to them as forsaking their “proper dwelling place” (certainly here referring to an abandoning of the spirit realm) is immediately followed by the statement: “So too Sodom and Gomorrah and the cities about them, after they in the same manner as the foregoing ones had committed fornication excessively and gone out after flesh for unnatural use, are placed before us as a warning example.” (Jude 6, 7) Thus, the combined weight of the Scriptural evidence points to angelic deviation, the performance of acts contrary to their spirit nature, occurring in the days of Noah. There seems to be no valid reason, then, for doubting that the ‘sons of God’ of Genesis 6:2-4 were angelic sons.—See NEPHILIM.

What???

According to the Bible, angels did come to earth to have sex with women. And like I said, there are so many things wrong with this picture. It raises so many questions. If heaven can’t be so great if you leave there to have sex. Sex must be really great so I say have as much as you can while on earth.  

But the real question is why would God create angels with the ability to have sexual urges and put them in an environment where they couldn’t satisfy those urges? The Bible says that they were “forsaking their “proper dwelling place” by coming to earth and taking women to have sex.

And God just let this happen. Isn’t He all knowing? Didn’t he realize that this was happening? They were at it long enough to have kids and he didn’t “notice”? Exactly how hot were these earth chicks? These questions demand answers.

Genesis 6:5: “ ⁵ Consequently Jehovah saw that the badness of man was abundant in the earth and every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only bad all the time. ⁶ And Jehovah felt regrets that he had made men in the earth, and he felt hurt at his heart. ⁷ So Jehovah said: “I am going to wipe men whom I have created off the surface of the ground, from man to domestic animal, to moving animal and to flying creature of the heavens, because I do regret that I have made them.”

Again, WHAT??????

The God of the Bible, perfect in every way, “regrets that he had made men in the earth”? What about the angels? They were the bad guys. Anyway, how does any of this make any sense?

Just think about it.

Therefore my goal in life is to have as many non self induced orgasms and to get high as many times as I can, remains intact.

Eat your heart out, Angels!!

More Religious Bullshit

From Yahoo Sports, Tue Mar 23, 2010 5:45 pm EDT

The article is entitled: “Mennonite Baseball Team Plays School’s First National Anthem”

By ‘Duk

“Can you imagine a baseball game starting without the playing of the national anthem?”

“Yeah, me neither.”

“But for 53 seasons, that’s exactly what happened — or didn’t happen, rather —  before games played at Goshen College. Then came Tuesday afternoon when the song was played at the small Mennonite school in Indiana for the first time.”

“I wasn’t really aware of this, but the Mennonites have traditionally held a complicated relationship with the national anthem, partly based on the faith’s belief that the song glorifies war and partly based on its belief that citizenship with God comes before their citizenship with any nation.”

*****

The rest of the article is at the bottom of this page along with the link.

There are actually several religions with the same belief, among them Jehovah’s Witnesses.

And they have a valid point.

When you pledge allegiance to the flag and by extension, the government, you are agreeing to do whatever that government tells you. Allegiance is defined as “Loyalty or the obligation of loyalty, as to a nation, sovereign, or cause.” It is synonyms to fidelity.

 So, if you are a Christian, what if the country tells you to do an un-Christian thing, like, I don’t know, say put on a uniform and kill people that the country doesn’t agree with. What would you do? Did you pledge allegiance to the country? Then you have already agreed to do it.

Do you see a conflict? Now, I am an American and I will put on a uniform and kill anyone the Government tells me to kill, as I am pledged to protect the US Constitution and preserve our Republic and way of life. Fuck religion.

But if you “Have given your life to Christ” do the goals of the United States and your church agree? Likely not. So, if you join or support the military, you are a hypocrite. Any religion that supports and promotes the military is likely also hypocritical.

More religious bullshit.

If you believe in the Bible and Jesus, have the balls to take your stand. I don’t believe in the Bible and Jesus, so I don’t give a shit.

But do you? Think about it.

The rest of the article:

There is no blanket policy for Mennonite schools when it comes to the anthem, but it had not been played in the 116-year history of Goshen College. The school received 400 complaint letters last season when a radio show talked about the anthem not being played before a basketball game and school administrators ultimately decided on a one-year trial period of the song to foster a more welcoming atmosphere for visitors.

That led to a controversial first playing on Tuesday as Goshen prepared to faceoff against Siena Heights, a small Catholic school from Michigan.  

From the Indianapolis Star:

“Tiny wooden grandstands were packed with more than 100 fans, a mix of students and adults. Most of them stood during the playing of the anthem — about a dozen remained seated and at least one booed during the song.

“Some students painted American flags on their chest while three members of an off-campus group came dressed in black with black crosses painted on their forehead.

“‘This is a sign of mourning,’ Nekeisha Alexis-Baker said about the cross.”

School president Jim Brenneman told reporters Tuesday that one of his school’s goals is to address the “complex issues” that Mennonites face with “academic rigor and civility.”

That should be the goal of any higher education outlet, so kudos to Brenneman for keeping that in the forefront as his school explores its beliefs and values.

And a big BLS head nod for introducing the song in the most normal, natural and American way possible. Once again, baseball shows itself to be one of society’s great uniters.

Here’s the link:

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/blog/big_league_stew/post/Mennonite-baseball-team-plays-school-s-first-Nat?urn=mlb,229776

More Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit

The Watchtower, 10/1/94, pg 8

“Even as Bible prophecy pointed forward to the Messiah, it also directs us to the close-knit body of anointed Christian Witnesses that now serve as the faithful and discreet slave. It helps us to understand the Word of God. All who want to understand the Bible should appreciate that the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.—John 6:68.”

So, here Jehovah’s Witnesses say “the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through” Jehovah’s Witnesses. “Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave” is them.

Further, we have this from The Watchtower, May 1, 1992, pg. 31.

“Of course, help is needed. It is unlikely that someone who simply reads the Bible without taking advantage of divinely provided aids could discern the light. That is why Jehovah God has provided “the faithful and discreet slave,” foretold at Matthew 24:45-47. Today that “slave” is represented by the Governing Body of Jehovah’s Witnesses. It is under the direction of this body that the “Light Bearers” District Convention has been arranged.”

Bit, while Jehovah’s Witness literature is called by them “divinely provided aids” they claim not to be inspired:

The Watchtower 9/1/85, Page 26

“With the help of Jehovah’s spirit, Paul wrote a number of Bible books and made many converts to Christianity. So he certainly proved to be adequately qualified for the Christian ministry. In a modern parallel, especially since this journal was first published in 1879, the anointed remnant of Christ’s disciples, though not inspired as was Paul, have produced much Bible literature.”

They produce literature, that is “divinely provided”, but claim not to be “inspired as was Paul”. So how exactly does this work? Does Jehovah email or twitter “The Truth” to them?

Think about the actual mechanics of the process. If you are interpreting the Bible by writing “divinely provided aids”, somehow God has got to get “his truth” to you. Do the magazines and books appear magically overnight on the desks of the Governing Body?

Of what value is anything they say, if it is not “inspired of God”?

Especially since they have predicted Armageddon would come at least seven times in the 20^th Century and here it is 2010 and nothing has happened.

The only thing Jehovah’s Witnesses can claim is that they were 100% wrong.

Grab Your Pee Pee’s Boyz, The Catholicks are at it Again!!

From the New York Times:

“Vatican Declined to Defrock U.S. Priest Who Abused Boys”

“Top Vatican officials — including the future Pope Benedict XVI — did not defrock a priest who molested as many as 200 deaf boys, even though several American bishops repeatedly warned them that failure to act on the matter could embarrass the church, according to church files newly unearthed as part of a lawsuit.”

The rest of the article is at the bottom of this post. Also, here is the link:

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/25/world/europe/25vatican.html

Well, at least they were deaf and couldn’t hear the priest coming.  Yuk, yuk.

When is this all going to end? Never. There will always be perverts and when they get alone with the children of their preference, they will molest them. This has been going on since the beginning of man. I am certainly not condoning it. I think these guys should be castrated with a rusty spoon and then killed.

Be that as it may, I make it a practice never to be alone with any kid, thus no accusations can be made. I was babysitting a set of 19 year old twins. Fact is, they molested me and I considered pressing charges until they promised not to stop.

Seriously, though this is not an exclusively religious issue. Recently there are incidents reported involving the Boy Scouts. I’m sure there are Girl Scout incidents as well. People will be people. I also do not think that this is a new phenomina. In fact, there are lenty of ancient accounts of guys molesting young kids of both sexes.

I do have a bone to pick (pardon the pun), however with the incidents where a hot older woman has sex with an underage male. Like the Debra La Fave saga. “Oh, the boy will have psychological damage”

Yea, but only because he will never be able to score a better piece of ass in his life. The dude has peaked. I bet all the boys on her classes were lusting after her and it was their wildest dream to fuck her eyeballs out. Have you seen this chick? She is over the top HOT!!

I ask you, where the hell were these teachers when I was in school?

Anyway, while this is whooped up in the press, it isn’t exclusively a Catholic thing. But, I do have a bone to pick (pardon the reuse of the pun) with the Catholic Church. To be a Priest you have to remain celibate.  Who’s fucking stupid idea was that? Two things happen. First, it attracts gays to an all male environment and second straight men who become priests usually end up fucking someone, women, boy or donkey. Why would the Church create this type of situation? Any idiot could see what would happen and indeed what is happening.

OK, so I am not a Priest, as it conflicts with my life’s work of having as many non self induced orgasms and getting high as many times as I can before I die.

The dick is mightier than the sword.

The rest of the above article:

“The internal correspondence from bishops in Wisconsin directly to Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, the future pope, shows that while church officials tussled over whether the priest should be dismissed, their highest priority was protecting the church from scandal.”

“The documents emerge as Pope Benedict is facing other accusations that he and direct subordinates often did not alert civilian authorities or discipline priests involved in sexual abuse when he served as an archbishop in Germany and as the Vatican’s chief doctrinal enforcer.”

“The Wisconsin case involved an American priest, the Rev. Lawrence C. Murphy, who worked at a renowned school for deaf children from 1950 to 1974. But it is only one of thousands of cases forwarded over decades by bishops to the Vatican office called the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, led from 1981 to 2005 by Cardinal Ratzinger. It is still the office that decides whether accused priests should be given full canonical trials and defrocked.”

“In 1996, Cardinal Ratzinger failed to respond to two letters about the case from Rembert G. Weakland, Milwaukee’s archbishop at the time. After eight months, the second in command at the doctrinal office, Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, now the Vatican’s secretary of state, instructed the Wisconsin bishops to begin a secret canonical trial that could lead to Father Murphy’s dismissal.”

“But Cardinal Bertone halted the process after Father Murphy personally wrote to Cardinal Ratzinger protesting that he should not be put on trial because he had already repented and was in poor health and that the case was beyond the church’s own statute of limitations.”

“I simply want to live out the time that I have left in the dignity of my priesthood,” Father Murphy wrote near the end of his life to Cardinal Ratzinger. “I ask your kind assistance in this matter.” The files contain no response from Cardinal Ratzinger. “

“The New York Times obtained the documents, which the church fought to keep secret, from Jeff Anderson and Mike Finnegan, the lawyers for five men who have brought four lawsuits against the Archdiocese of Milwaukee. The documents include letters between bishops and the Vatican, victims’ affidavits, the handwritten notes of an expert on sexual disorders who interviewed Father Murphy and minutes of a final meeting on the case at the Vatican.”

“Father Murphy not only was never tried or disciplined by the church’s own justice system, but also got a pass from the police and prosecutors who ignored reports from his victims, according to the documents and interviews with victims. Three successive archbishops in Wisconsin were told that Father Murphy was sexually abusing children, the documents show, but never reported it to criminal or civil authorities.”

“Instead of being disciplined, Father Murphy was quietly moved by Archbishop William E. Cousins of Milwaukee to the Diocese of Superior in northern Wisconsin in 1974, where he spent his last 24 years working freely with children in parishes, schools and, as one lawsuit charges, a juvenile detention center. He died in 1998, still a priest.”

“Even as the pope himself in a recent letter to Irish Catholics has emphasized the need to cooperate with civil justice in abuse cases, the correspondence seems to indicate that the Vatican’s insistence on secrecy has often impeded such cooperation. At the same time, the officials’ reluctance to defrock a sex abuser shows that on a doctrinal level, the Vatican has tended to view the matter in terms of sin and repentance more than crime and punishment.”

“The Vatican spokesman, the Rev. Federico Lombardi, was shown the documents and was asked to respond to questions about the case. He provided a statement saying that Father Murphy had certainly violated “particularly vulnerable” children and the law, and that it was a “tragic case.” But he pointed out that the Vatican was not forwarded the case until 1996, years after civil authorities had investigated the case and dropped it.”

“Father Lombardi emphasized that neither the Code of Canon Law nor the Vatican norms issued in 1962, which instruct bishops to conduct canonical investigations and trials in secret, prohibited church officials from reporting child abuse to civil authorities. He did not address why that had never happened in this case.”

“As to why Father Murphy was never defrocked, he said that “the Code of Canon Law does not envision automatic penalties.” He said that Father Murphy’s poor health and the lack of more recent accusations against him were factors in the decision.”

“The Vatican’s inaction is not unusual. Only 20 percent of the 3,000 accused priests whose cases went to the church’s doctrinal office between 2001 and 2010 were given full church trials, and only some of those were defrocked, according to a recent interview in an Italian newspaper with Msgr. Charles J. Scicluna, the chief internal prosecutor at that office. An additional 10 percent were defrocked immediately. Ten percent left voluntarily. But a majority — 60 percent — faced other “administrative and disciplinary provisions,” Monsignor Scicluna said, like being prohibited from celebrating Mass. “

Jehovah’s Witnesses are False Prophets

More Jehovah’s Witness bullshit. These are quotes from their own literature where the Watchtower Society prophesied that Armageddon would come at 7 separate and distinct time periods and they were wrong.

1914 – “In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.” (The Time is at Hand, 1902 edition, p. 99) Note: this same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book.

End of WW1: “The present great war in Europe is the beginning of the Armageddon of the Scriptures (Revelation 19:16-20). It will eventuate in the complete overthrow of all the systems of error which have so long oppressed the people of God and deluded the world”. (Pastor Russell’s Sermons, 1915, p. 676) In the same year (1915),

1925 – “The period must end in 1925 . . . [This date] is definitely fixed in the Scriptures. Every thinking person can see that a great climax is at hand. The scriptures clearly indicate that the climax is the fall of Satan’s empire and the full establishment of the Messianic kingdom . . . Therefore, it can be confidently said at this time that millions now living will never die”. (Golden Age, January 4, 1922, p. 217

In the 1930’s -  they had a big campaign by Judge Rutherford: “Millions Now living Will Never Die”. Since only Jehovah’s Witnesses will never die and there are, as of this writing not 2 millions of Jehovah’s Witnesses (remember He said millions) still alive, this is now wrong

1975 – Watchtower, October 15, 1969 pages 622 and 623:

“More recently earnest researchers of the Holy Bible have made a recheck of its chronology. According to their calculations the six millenniums of mankind’s life on earth would end in the mid-seventies…. Would not, then, the end of six millenniums of mankind’s laborious enslavement under Satan the Devil be the fitting time for Jehovah God to usher in a Sabbath millennium for all his human creatures? Yes, indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.”

Notice the use of the definite article “the”. It would be “the fitting time”, not “a fitting time” not “an appropriate time” but “THE FITTING TIME”, to the exclusion of all other times. “Yes, Indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath”. Not “might be”, not “could be”, but “WILL BE”.

Here is what they were saying just before 1975:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

What, you sold your house. quit your job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?

End of the 20th Century – Again in 1971, they said it would come in the 20th century: ”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

Within the life span of the 1914 generation: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

None of the above happened and as of 1995, the above 1914 thing is wrong.

The Witnesses trip themselves up on their own literature.

Jehovah’s Witness and the Memorial of Jesus Christ’s Death.

It’s that time of year again. You guessed it! It’s when Jehovah’s Witnesses celebrate the Memorial of Jesus Christ’s death on the first full moon after the Spring Equinox, coinciding with the Jewish Passover.

So, what happens is that all the Jo Ho’s gather at their Kingdom Halls, some asshole gives a talk about what this day means and then a group of guys will literally pass a cup of wine and a plate of unleavened bread in front of each member of the audience.

The only ones who partake or eat the bread and drink the wine are the anointed. There are two types of Jo Ho’s, the anointed who are going to heaven and “the other sheep” who will live here on earth.

Interestingly, the anointed number only 144,000 and the early Christians were anointed. Those anointed living today are referred to as “the remnant”. Since I was a kid they said that the number was decreasing:

The Watchtower 1/1/69 page 26:

“It was observed that only 10,619 individuals partook of the Memorial emblems of wine and unleavened bread, indicating that they were of the anointed class, the remnant of the bride of Christ yet on earth. This number of partakers continues to get smaller and smaller each year.”

It is interesting to note that the number of partakers or “the remnant” has been fairly level for the last 20 years or so with an increase in 2009 to 10,857, which is larger than the 1969 figure. This is from the 2009 JW Service Report. It is also interesting to note that the Jo Ho’s are taking great pains to bury this number, but it still can be extracted from their data.

Logically the number of “the remnant” should be decreasing but in fact according to their own literature, that number is increasing.

Now, anyone can, when offered the wine and bread, partake. The Jo Ho’s do not question anyone who partakes. Some guy could wander in off the street and partake and they would not be questioned. However, privately, the Jo Ho’s would ridicule them. I know, I seen that and done that.

Anyway, back in the 1930’s all Jo Ho’s were anointed. And the number was limited to 144,000. But the membership was growing and about to exceed 144,000. So, the Watchtower Society had to come up with a quick fix which was “Hey, God just revealed to us that some of you won’t go to heaven, but live here on a paradise earth! How does that sound?”

I guess it was OK, because by the time I was born and raised a Jo Ho, most of us were “other sheep”.

Notwithstanding the Jehovah’s Witness bizarre and unconventional Voo Doo, the whole “Christ died for us” thing has never made sense to me.

God: “Shit, look at those asshole humans! Fucking each other, killing each other, sinning out their asses!”

God’s personal Angel secretary: “Yea, pretty pathetic. I think you should smite them!”

God:”No, that would be too easy. I know, well send my son to earth, let them kill him and say that because they did that, they will all have a chance to go to heaven or live on the earth forever…IF they do what I say. Then we’ll give them this huge, pointless, improvable book that they will think is from me…well it actually is, but no one will ever be able to understand it!”

God’s personal Angel secretary: “Hmmm, I don’t know sir. I mean, all due respect, that makes no sense.”

God: “Of course it makes no sense! I’m just fucking with them! Come on, it’ll be fun to watch!”

God’s personal Angel secretary: “You did mention that they would kill Jesus. How are you going to convince him?”

God: “I’ll tell him I’ll make him a King or something. His ego won’t let him say no! Hey, Jesus! Jesus Christ, will you get over here!!”

To recap, God creates perfect man. God lets another spirit being, Satan cause them to sin. (Why didn’t he stop it then?) Then, because they sinned they are condemned to be imperfect and suffer and die. Then, in order to straighten all this out, his perfect son has to take on human form and be tortured to death. Then, men fight for centuries over who is right, what the Bible really says, what Jesus really meant, who is a real Christian, religion flourishes and causes the suffering of billions.

So, all Christians celebrate this at Easter. The Jo Ho’s, always the contrarians celebrate in their own bizarre ritualistic way.

And, as always, nothing happens. Christ does not appear, the world is not destroyed, Armageddon does not come.

But, they still make beer and produce porn, so all is right with the World.

“Oh yea, you apostate piece of shit! God will destroy you soon and the birds will eat the eyes out of your rotting corpse (they really say this)….sooon….very soooon!!

If there is a God, He’s fucking with us. All of us.

More Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit, 4/24/10

This is from an article in the Democrat and Chronicle newspaper, Rochester, New York, by Bennett J. Loudon. It’s from July of 2009, but it’s topic is timeless. I love the title:

“It’s Chicken Little Season in the Jehovah’s Witness World.”

“Jehovah’s Witnesses prepare for the end”

“Thousands of people are expected to attend the last day of a three-day religious convention in downtown Rochester, where the program today will focus on how to survive what organizers believe is the approaching end of the world.”

“Keep the Watch is the theme of the Jehovah’s Witnesses convention at the Blue Cross Arena at the Community War Memorial that is focused on recognizing signs of the end time and preparing for it, organizers said.”

“Jeffrey Case, a spokesman for the Jehovah’s Witnesses, said the wars, rampant crime and massive hunger occurring worldwide are all signs of the apocalypse predicted in the Bible.”

“Those are all things that we see in the news all the time,” Case said.”

“This morning, there will be a presentation on how to survive the end of the world by living according to the Bible. In the afternoon, an hour long live dramatic presentation based on the parable of the prodigal son will be featured. That performance is intended especially for youths who may have strayed from the organization, Case said.”

“About 4,500 people from central New York and northern Pennsylvania were expected to attend each day of the three-day convention. Another three-day convention in about two weeks is expected to attract an equal number of people from the Rochester area. And a third convention at the arena in about three weeks will serve just as many people from Buffalo and western New York, Case said.”

“All the conventions are free and open to the public.”

“Once a year we look forward to the new information, the latest information on Bible understanding,” said Elijah Nelson, 55, of Syracuse, who attended the convention with his wife, Rebecca Nelson, 48.”

“One of the things that Jehovah’s Witnesses are known for is the love among them, and a district convention where you get to see 5,000 brothers and sisters is such a treat,” he said.”

     ___________________________________________________________________________________

Boy, does this bring back memories for me. Being raised a Jehovah’s Witness I was forced to participate in this summer assembly ritual. We never took a real family vacation. The Assembly was it. The seven of us, Elder Hitler, Sister Two Faced and us five kids, would, like thousands of other Jo Ho families, travel to some city in the Northeast, New York City, Buffalo, Boston, New Haven, stay in a motel for five days, sometimes longer. We would spend each day, often in the open sun, sitting on bleachers, in some stadium or convention center and listen all day to Witness after Witness drone on in a seemingly endless stream of speeches about “The Truth” or more realistically, whatever the Witnesses believed at the moment, as they change it frequently.

How I survived days of endless babble and the force feeding of the Jehovah’s Witness slurry, a huge cauldron of Bible quotes, revised “fact”, skewed history and constantly changing interpretations of everything, I’ll never know. I recall often resisting the impulse of simply running away, screaming, but never did. Surprisingly, no one else did either, though I’m sure many had the same thought.

As I had mentioned in a previous post, the Jo Ho’s are presently dateless. By that I mean they are not presently calling for a specific date for Armageddon. Thats when the loving, kind, merciful God they worship slaughters, in a most horrible way, all non Jehovah’s Witnesses, in a great global carnage. When I was a Jo Ho, I couldn’t wait for Jehovah to kill all you non believing, devil worshiping hoards of unwashed religious masses who didn’t know what we knew: we had the truth, you don’t have shit. Ha ha, Satans got you fooled!! You deserve to die and have the birds pick the eyes out of your rotting corpse. That’ll teach you to slam the door in the faces of God’s chosen people.

Watchtower, 9/1/89 page 19:

“ONLY Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.”

If you had been a Jehovah’s Witness in the last hundred years or so, you would have told non believers that God was going to destroy them in 1914, by the end of WW1 and 1925. Then in 1930’s, you would have been saying “Millions Now Living Will Never Die”. In the middle 60’s when it became apparent that the “Millions” thing was not going to happen and had long since been conveniently forgotten, wiped from the Witness conscience, you would have told people, “Armageddon is coming in 1975!” In 1976 when that didn’t happen, you would have been saying “Oh yea, well it’ll happen before the end of the 20^th Century and before the generation that witnesses the events in 1914 dies off”.

Oops. That didn’t happen either.

But now, the Witnesses aren’t saying exactly when it will happen but it “just around the corner” and of course only Jo Ho’s will survive.

And still, every year they have their big gatherings, District Assemblies, as described in this article and keep the propaganda machine going, indoctrinating the hapless masses. Still force feeding the Jo Ho Slurry to the membership. And they lap it up, as the weakminded, sorry, gullible shit heads we all were. 

Funny story. About two years ago, a Jehovah’s Witness told a friend of mine that it was too late for him. He was a walking dead man. “Too late for you to become a Jehovah’s Witness” he had told my friend.

In fact, you can become a Jehovah’s Witness in about six months. At this writing, in 2010, my friend could have become a Witness four times.

I guess at some point the earth will end. Will God destroy it at Armageddon? Hell if I know. I do know and their own literature shows that the Witnesses, having been 100% wrong, don’t have a fucking clue either.

Our Lives are Meaningless, More Bible Bullshit

Matthew 18:29 – 31, from The New World Translation of the Bible:

^“29 Do not two sparrows sell for a coin of small value? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground without YOUR Father’s [knowledge]. ³⁰ But the very hairs of YOUR head are all numbered. ³¹ Therefore have no fear: YOU are worth more than many sparrows.”

Matthew 18:29 – 31, from The King James Version of the Bible:29 Are not two sparrows sell for a farthing? And one of them shall not fall on the ground without YOUR Father knowing. 30 But the very hairs of YOUR head are all numbered. 31 Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows. “When I was in my early 20’s and still a Jehovah’s Witness, one of the guys in our congregation was in a bad car wreck.  Now, it was a single car accident, on a straight road. He claimed he fell asleep at the wheel, but he was known to take a drink or two and had just left his favorite bar. DUI? Likely, but I digress. This guy was really messed up in the wreck. He was paralyzed from the waist down and had a laundry list of injuries that caused other stuff, etc, etc. Oh yea, and he was diabetic.Well, as “luck” would have it, no sooner had “Bob” crashed his car into the tree that an ambulance came upon the scene. Subsequently, Bob’s life was miraculously “saved”.Well, the Witnesses, like every other religion, anxiously on the lookout for some tangible evidence that God exists and watches over them, seized on this incident as proof of “Jehovah’s love for us”. At the next summer assembly (I refer back to the previously post for “the assembly explanation) Bob was up there on stage, with his loving wife basically laying on a gurney, recounting how Jehovah had saved him by “miraculously” directing this ambulance to be there at that precise moment. If they had been a minute earlier, why Bob would likely be dead.Well, here was my question: If Jehovah loves Bob so much, why did he let him get in the accident to begin with? And the story doesn’t end here. Bob, who Jehovah so lovingly saved that night, lived another 5 years or so, in horrible pain, confined to his gurney before he finally suffered a fatal heart attack. At the Assembly that year, I bet they didn’t mention that part.There is no proof that God wrote the Bible, that Jesus ever lived and that God even gives a shit about us. In fact, read the headlines and see all the human suffering and you might come to the conclusion there is proof that he doesn’t care. I am Deist. I have concluded that Intelligent Design exists. However, I see no proof that God, He/She/It or They have anything to do with humans. Further, it is painfully evident that no religion represents the creator(s). Man has invented religion for a variety of reasons. It explains why bad things happen: God’s will. It explains that it’s all gonna be OK: God loves us. People credit God for all sorts of things form scoring touchdowns to surviving earthquakes. On the subject of earthquakes, during the recent tragedy in Haiti, al you heard from the survivors was how God had saved them. You didn’t hear much from the non survivors, as they were fucking DEAD. Somehow, God didn’t think them worthy of saving. All those crushed infants and toddlers must have done something to piss God off. “Oh, they are little angels now”. Of course they are. More religious piffle with which to self placate. They’re worm and rat food. There is no proof that they are anything but no longer living. Which brings me to my point. Our lives, mine, yours, everyone’s are absolutely meaningless. Think of any famous historical person and while this person may be remembered, he has millions of contemporaries that are forever forgotten. My Great Grandfather Ethan died when I was three weeks old. He had 10 kids, my Grandmother being the oldest. They’re all now dead, the last Great Uncle died 6 years ago. My contemporaries are next. When my generation is worm food, no one will remember any of Ethan’s kids. 75 or 100 years from now, a blink of an eye in the history of the universe, no one living is likely to remember me or any of us over 50. Oh, there are records of our existence, schooling, marriage dates etc, but who gives a shit? There’s always those who want to know where they came from so periodically all our records will be “exhumed”  Maybe a You Tube or home video. But not much more. We all know this and as we age and our mortality looms, we all think about these things. Religion gives us self worth. “God loves me. God will take me to heaven. I will exist eternally”. Good luck with that. The evidence suggests the exact opposite, but as I said, more religious piffle with which to self placate. Oh, I can hear the comments and email already: “You don’t know God’s love! Jesus is in my heart! Open your heart to him and you’ll see!”  You fucking moron, don’t you think I’ve don’t that? Don’t you think I have implored God/Jesus/Allah whoever to come into my heart and please, please, please help me understand? More times than I can count. I have never in my life seen or experienced an event that could be undoubtedly supernatural. Never. And believe me, if I did, I would recant every negative thing I’ve ever said about God. Maybe we all find out when we die. I don’t have a clue. I was wondering about “the very hairs of YOUR head are all numbered” thing in the Bible scripture at the beginning of this post. Exactly when does this numbering process begin and it is done periodically? I mean, is it updated? Cause, I gotta tell you, in my case last year’s count is definitely wrong as is every year since I started losing my hair. Is there a “hair cipher-er” in heaven who keeps these records on disk or something? I’m just sayin’. What’s the point, if the number is always changing?

Do You HATE Your Mother as Much as JESUS HATED His?

 

From The Landover Baptist Church site:  http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0504/mothersday.html

This site is a hoot. Its a parody of the Baptists. Funny shit!

A Biblical Approach to Mother’s Day.

Mother’s Day is really no different than any other pagan holiday. Its object is to get you to the mall and then trick you into worshiping someone other than Jesus. As True Baptists™, we must come to terms with the full knowledge that Satan’s burping whore of Babylon, the Catholic Church, is behind every shameless secular holiday. With Mother’s Day, the foul stench of papal involvement couldn’t be  more obvious. Because the ring-kissers  have made a history of whipping their psychosexual cravings for Jesus’ mother, Mary into such a fever pitch, that they spend all their time worrying about what went into her Holy Vagina, leaving no time to worship what came out of it – Jesus! 

Hell-bound Catholics (as if there are any other kind) would have you believe that Jesus loved his mother. But the Holy Bible tells us differently. Jesus said, “If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother…he cannot be my disciple.” (Luke 14:26). So it is perfectly clear that we are called upon by Christ to hate our parents.  Fortunately, as sweet Jenna and Barbara Bush have found, this isn’t a very onerous expectation. We may spend our entire lives doing our best to emulate the Lord Jesus, but rest assured, we will never match the utter contempt and intolerable scorn that He had for His own mother.  And that’s not even getting into what Jesus felt about His Daddy!  But imagine what you would feel like if you knew your father was out to kill you only to make Himself look more forgiving to others!  

Can you imagine being doted and hounded by your own mother as much as Jesus was from His?  Even for a Jewish mother, the woman was clearly a pest. Scripture reveals to us that she was an insufferable leech when it came to her precious Son.  Once, when Jesus was attending a sleazy wedding party in Galilee, His mother started pestering Him to perform one of His magic tricks when they ran out of cheap grape juice. Jesus turned to her and said, “Woman, what have I to do with thee?” (John 2:4).  He must have been so fed up with His mother’s incessant nagging (and her insisting that He accompany her to such a trashy event) that He turned 6 vessels of water into Welch’s grape juice just to get her to shut up for the rest of the day.  And when Mary gulped down a big glass of unfermented wine she became furious that she wasn’t getting the buzz she craved and said things to Jesus in language that the editors of the Gospels refused to even transcribe.

Mary was always trying to make a momma’s boy out of Jesus, but He just wouldn’t stand for it.  He was more of Daddy’s boy. But He even got fed up with His own Heavenly Father in the end, as well. He did everything His Daddy God asked Him to, but when He was slapped onto the cross like a slab of  raw meat, He was all alone shouting, “My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46). And while Jesus was hanging up there, being barbecued in the hot sun for the sins of mankind, He was still able to muster enough strength to look down at His confused mother and scream, “Woman, behold thy son!” (John 19:26).   This was the Judaic equivalent of “Well, I hope you’re satisfied!” Jesus’ words there reflect a smug satisfaction through His pain and suffering that He would never again be subjected to a life of having to impress His mother’s friends at Jerusalem tea parties with His super powers.  The good Lord would only perform one more trick before leaving this world: to cheat death.  And it wouldn’t be for His mother.  He became undead for all of us!  Particularly those of us here at Landover Baptist and other Bible believing churches across America! Glory to God! But you better believe, during His brief time as a freshly resurrected corpse He wasn’t even tempted to seek out his yenta harpy of a mother to spook her!  No sir! He hotfooted right back to Heaven!

So this Mother’s day, we encourage you to make it a Bible-friendly day by sending your mother a little card to remind her of how much you and Jesus loathe her.  By sending this card you will have proof in your file on Judgment Day that you actually did follow Jesus’ commandment to hate your mother.  And you can join Jesus in slapping your knees and having a big old belly-laugh as both of you watch your mothers slide down a greased shoot towards the unquenchable fires of an everlasting Mother-welcoming Hell.  To God be the glory!  

You can get the Mother’s Day card at http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0504/mothersday.html

More Bible and Jehovah’s Witness Psyco Bullshit

 

First of all, I am not a behavioral psychologist. However, I can read and am fairly intelligent. I bring this up because in the past, when I have discussed or posted comments on this issue, I was blasted by Jehovah’s Witnesses for not being a behavioral psychologist, so I could not speak with authority. I would answer that I am not an auto mechanic, but I know when my car won’t start.  So, while not knowing the intricacies of automobiles, I do know the generalities, which are easily understood by persons with average intelligence.

I also know that if I run a Jo Ho over with my Buick it will hurt, if not kill him because the car is so darn heavy compared to the average human and is made of metal which is tougher than human skin and bones. Easy concepts to understand even though I am not a Doctor, Physicist or Metallurgist.

So, to Jo Ho’s an others who would object to my referring to cognitive dissonance, because I am not a Behavioral Psychologist, let me say fuck you, in advance. If that’s the best you can do, don’t quote Bible scriptures at me because you are not a Hebrew or Greek Scholar, a Biblical Archeologist or an Historian, studied in Biblical culture and History. Assholes.

Cognitive dissonance is a psychological phenomenon which refers to the discomfort felt at a discrepancy or conflict between what you already know or believe, and new information or interpretation that seems to be diametrically opposed to you strongly held belief or cognition.

Leon Festinger, was an American social psychologist, responsible for the development of the Theory of Cognitive Dissonance, Social Comparison Theory, and the discovery of the role of propinquity (nearness in time or place) in the formation of social ties as well as other contributions to the study of social networks.

As previously mentioned. Leon developed the Theory of Cognitive Dissonance, which suggests that inconsistency among beliefs or behaviors will cause an uncomfortable psychological tension. This will lead people to change their beliefs to fit their actual behavior, rather than the other way around, as popular wisdom may suggest.

He wrote a cool book, “When Prophecy Fails” (1956), which was about this flying saucer cult in the 50s.

From Wikipedia:  “Festinger and his associates read an interesting item in their local newspaper headlined “Prophecy from planet Clarion call to city: flee that flood.” A housewife from Michigan, given the name “Marian Keech” in the book, had mysteriously been given messages in her house in the form of “automatic writing” from alien beings on the planet Clarion. These messages revealed that the world would end in a great flood before dawn on December 21, 1954. Mrs. Keech had previously been involved with L. Ron Hubbard‘s Dianetics movement, and her cult incorporated ideas from what was to become Scientology. The group of believers, headed by Keech, had taken strong behavioral steps to indicate their degree of commitment to the belief. They had left jobs, college, and spouses, and had given away money and possessions to prepare for their departure on the flying saucer, which was to rescue the group of true believers.”

“Festinger and his colleagues saw this as a case that would lead to the arousal of dissonance when the prophecy failed. Altering the belief would be difficult, as Keech and her group were committed at considerable expense to maintain it. Another option would be to enlist social support for their belief. As Festinger wrote, “If more and more people can be persuaded that the system of belief is correct, then clearly it must after all be correct.” In this case, if Keech could add consonant elements by converting others to the basic premise, then the magnitude of her dissonance following disconfirmation would be reduced. Festinger and his colleagues predicted that the inevitable disconfirmation would be followed by an enthusiastic effort at proselytizing to seek social support and lessen the pain of disconfirmation.”

Well, as I recall, the world was not destroyed by a flood in 1957, so how did the deluded morons rationalize that failed prophesy? Well, in the nick of time another message by automatic writing is sent to Keech. It states, in effect, that the God of Earth has decided to spare the planet from destruction. The cataclysm has been called off: “The little group, sitting all night long, had spread so much light that God had saved the world from destruction.” So, after that, the group begins an urgent campaign to spread its message to as broad an audience as possible.

I am not sure exactly what the message was. “Hey, join us. God told us he would destroy the world and because of us, he spared you!”

“Hey…..yea,well…..thanks for that, but we’re good. Here’s a dollar for the cause….we’re gonna go now..see ya’….assholes”

So now we have this from Jehovah’s Witness literature:

From the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

And from the same Awake, page 15:

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

Also, this from: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216:

JEHOVAH’S “SWORD” AGAINST “ALL THOSE OF FLESH”
9 Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin against the modern antitype of Jerusalem, Christendom.”

None of this happened. I was 18 in 1969. I’ve been through college, am a professional and a grandfather. Also, as I recall the world did not end at the end of the 20^th Century.

I was a Jehovah’s Witness at this time and these were strongly held beliefs, cognitions. The Watchtower Society has never explained why these prophesies failed. And there are many others. These are only two.

Basically, they simply stopped mentioning them and they simply went away. However they always have this to fall back on. They actually claim to be imperfect and make mistakes…but then they say this:

The Watchtower, 10/1/94, pg 8

“Even as Bible prophecy pointed forward to the Messiah, it also directs us to the close-knit body of anointed Christian Witnesses that now serve as the faithful and discreet slave. It helps us to understand the Word of God. All who want to understand the Bible should appreciate that the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.”

So “We’re imperfect” and “the “greatly diversified wisdom of God” can become known only through Jehovah’s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.” (The faithful and discreet slave is the Watchtower Society/Jehovah’s Witnesses)

No conflict here. Just Jo Ho bullshit.

More Bible Bullshit: Hey, It’s Not My Fault!!

OK, so when did you become aware of that you were “imperfect”?  Maybe you were ten or so. And where did this notion of “imperfection” come from?  Likely form observation. I mean, by ten you realize you’re a total fuck up so when you hear or read it from the Bible, it just reinforces the notion.

The Bible says we all “sin”, so we’re all “imperfect”:

Romans 3:23, New World Translation: “²³ For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”

Romans 3:23, King James Version of the Bible: “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God”

So, we’re all fuck ups. We know it by just living and observing and then the Bible piles on. I remember when I first became aware that I “was a sinner”. I was maybe 8 or 9 and my first thought was “Hey, it’s not my fault!!”

Why? How did we get this way? Again the Bible is kind enough to tell us:

Romans 5:12, New World Translation: “That is why, just as through one man sin entered into the world and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men because they had all sinned”

Romans 5:12, King James Version of the Bible “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned”

And just who was this fucking loser? Adam, that asshole. So, Adam’s bitch talks him into eating the forbidden fruit (the Bible does not say it was an apple) and because of his fuck up, we are all sinners and what does it say? “thus death spread to all men because they had all sinned”.

Good job, Adam, you fuck wad. But wait, let’s think about this again. So who made this rule? God made the rule. Isn’t that special. So God decides that we all inherit death because Adam ate a Pomegranate or something.

So guess what. I was right when I was 8. “It’s not my fault”. I, in fact we, all of us, through no fault of our own, end up as “sinners” or imperfect. Dead people walking!!

“Hey, it’s not our fault.

But then the Bible tells us this:

John 3:16, New World Translation: “¹⁶ “For God loved the world so much that he gave his only-begotten Son, in order that everyone exercising faith in him might not be destroyed but have everlasting life”

John 3:16, King James Version of the Bible: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

How many times have we seen, usually at sporting events, assholes holding up signs with this scripture on it. Too many. Sit down you dumb fucks.

Many people call this “The good news!!” You fucking loony bastards.

This whole scenario really frosts my ass. First, I am a sinner and I am going to die because of what some asshole allegedly did, centuries ago. “Hey, “It’s not my fault!”. Then I am charged with “believeth in him” (Jesus) to get rid of my “sin” so now I can “have everlasting life”.

What the fuck!! I’m imperfect, “Hey, “It’s not my fault!” but to fix it I, me, myself and/or I, have to PROACTIVELY DO SOMETHING!! Why??

“Believe in Jesus”!!. I don’t want to. I do not believe in Jesus.

But still, I “inherited” sin. I didn’t do anything to become an imperfect human. In fact, if it was up to me, I’d be a perfect human, instead of a fuck up. But, nooooo, sin was thrust upon me. But, now it’s up to me to fix it.

We, if I have to believe in Jesus, I’m dead/going to hell/will be reincarnated as a roach, whatever.

So, more Bible bullshit. We’re all fuck ups, through no fault of our own. Further proof that my life’s goals of having as many non-self induced orgasms and getting high as many times as I can before I die makes perfect sense.

It’s OK to have “self induced” orgasms, but they don’t count.

The Latest Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit

Recently a JW Elder told me “You should come back to the Jehovah’s Witnesses…just in case we are right.”

Seriously.

I am a disfellowshipped Jehovah’s Witness and an Apostate.  Disfellowshipped is Witness-speak for excommunicated. As such, I am shunned by most Jo Ho’s including most of my family members who are Jo Ho’s.

Since I had been a JW for 50 years, I accumulated a whole lot of JW friends and acquaintances, many of whom are still JWs. As a side point, many have left or still attend but really don’t believe it is the true religion. It’s just easier to “go along”.

Anyway, this guy, a long time Elder sees me in a restaurant. I’m always getting approached by well meaning JW’s: “We miss you”, “You would be welcome back with open arms” yadda yadda, fuck off.

So this guy comes over to me and says “ I have been giving our conversations a lot of thought” I have spoken to him several times in the past, pointing out where the JW’s predicted Armageddon would come 7 times in the 20^th Century and they were wrong as well as other inconsistencies in the Witness Dogma.

He continued “You should come back to the Jehovah’s Witnesses…just in case we are right. What would it hurt? You would be back with your family.” I should just, “go along”. Hedge my bet.

He continued: “So, if we’re wrong no harm, no foul. But if we’re right, you’re on the winning team!”

What?

I don’t believe a word the Witnesses say. Wouldn’t  Jehovah know that? According to them he would.  So, if I simply went back to the Witnesses and, as they believe, God “reads my heart”, what’s the point? I don’t believe what Jehovah’s Witnesses teach and believe, God would know that, so he would kill me at Armageddon.

Why would this idiot propose this? This is obviously what he thinks. What a fucking moron.

What an idiot. You can’t make this crap up.

Actually, if your a Witness this is quite disturbing.

More Bible Bullshit, Childrens Stories of all Things.

The Jehovah’s Witnesses have a book called “My Book of Bible Stories”. When one of my grandsons was small and I was still a Jo Ho, I thought I would read him a story. So, I got the book out and went to the table of contents to see what he might like.

Here were a few of my choices:

“Giants in the Earth”. Angels come to earth because they are sexually aroused by human women and father children who become wicked giants and kill and generally are wicked.

“What’s “sexually aroused” Grandpa?” I could imagine being asked. So I moved on.

“A Good Son and a Bad Son”. Cain murders Abel over some vegetable vs. meat thing. I don’t even understand it. Let’s look further.

“The Great Flood” God drowns 99.99999% of the world’s population and he really isn’t very clear exactly why. They are just generally “wicked”. Drown the bastards. Mmmmn, still not real suitable for a toddler.

Well, we had, the story of Dinah, when she has sex with this uncircumcised guy, so her brothers trick the guy, who, by the way is trying to make it right. The brothers end up killing a lot of people, mostly men. In fact the Bible refers to it as a “town”. So, they kill the guys and take their stuff and their women.  Jacob, the father is worried that other nearby cities might get pissed and retaliates so they move.

No mention of murdering guys and taking their stuff.  Again. I don’t get it so I chose not to read the story to my grandson.

Looking further there were many other stories, rife with sex, death, people turning into salt, the walls of cities crashing and the entire population slaughtered, guys selling their brother into slavery and other unsavory tales.

It occurred to me that the Bible is indeed and unsavory book, full of sex, violence, slaughter and suffering.

We watched a Bob the Builder video instead.

But, the point is the Bible is at best “R” rated. At least as far as violence and death. Regarding sex, it approaches an “X” rating.

But ranting Cristian fucks picket Madonna.

Assholes

Hey! How Do You Like the New Look?? Oh Wait, Never Mind

I thought I would liven things up visually with a new design. Actually, I don’t have a really “new”design, as WordPress give you about 100 choices and you simply chose one. I suppose I could do a custom one but that would involve some effort, which I don’t care to expend.

Anyway, I tried several and settled on a real nice looking one. So I changed to that one and realized that it did not have a way for me to log in. I’m sure it did, a more accurate statement would be that I couldn’t figure the damn thing out. So, I’m back to sort of the same old design.

I was thinking of a new theme pic. What do you think about my first choice?

 A perfect commentary on the condition of our country. Hey Obama, great example for American youth.

Asshole.

More Religious Bullshit From CNN

From an article entitled  “Are there dangers in being ‘spiritual but not religious’?

” It’s a trendy phrase people often use to describe their belief that they don’t need organized religion to live a life of faith.”

“But for Jesuit priest James Martin, the phrase also hints at something else: selfishness.”

“Being spiritual but not religious can lead to complacency and self-centeredness,” says Martin, an editor at America, a national Catholic magazine based in New York City. “If it’s just you and God in your room, and a religious community makes no demands on you, why help the poor?”

“Religious debates erupt over everything from doctrine to fashion. Martin has jumped into a running debate over the “I’m spiritual but not religious” phrase.”

“The “I’m spiritual but not religious” community is growing so much that one pastor compared it to a movement. In a 2009 survey by the research firm LifeWay Christian Resources, 72 percent of millennials (18- to 29-year-olds) said they’re “more spiritual than religious.” The phrase is now so commonplace that it’s spawned its own acronym (“I’m SBNR”) and Facebook page: SBNR.org.”

“But what exactly does being “spiritual but not religious” mean, and could there be hidden dangers in living such a life?”

Here’s the link:

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/personal/06/03/spiritual.but.not.religious/index.html

 

First, thanks CNN for advertising my site. Sorry your network is now irrelevant and is a lackey of the Obama liberal socialist machine.

Now, let me shit all over the first part of the article. Heres the first part again and my comments in bold. 

The article’s about a trendy phrase people often use to describe their belief that they don’t need organized religion to live a life of faith. (True)

But for Jesuit priest James Martin, the phrase also hints at something else: selfishness.  (Oh, this from an obvious unbiased source like a Jesuit priets. Look up the history of the Jesuit order. Lots of criminal acts, including murder. But, hey selfishness is REALLY bad and not being a Catholic and/or Jesuit is REALLY, REALLY bad…and selfish)

“Being spiritual but not religious can lead to complacency and self-centeredness,” says Martin, an editor at America, a national Catholic magazine based in New York City. “If it’s just you and God in your room, and a religious community makes no demands on you, why help the poor?”  (Yea, and how could you join a secret religious order to kill people, if you weren’t part of the religious community. Makes perfect sense. I love the inference that non-religious people are not charitable and have no morals. Belonging to a religion is not necessary for one to be a good citizen)

Religious debates erupt over everything from doctrine to fashion. Martin has jumped into a running debate over the “I’m spiritual but not religious” phrase. (So what? Wecome aboard, member of murdering secret society)

The “I’m spiritual but not religious” community is growing so much that one pastor compared it to a movement. In a 2009 survey by the research firm LifeWay Christian Resources, 72 percent of millennials (18- to 29-year-olds) said they’re “more spiritual than religious.” The phrase is now so commonplace that it’s spawned its own acronym (“I’m SBNR”) and Facebook page: SBNR.org. (Hey, whats with the SBNR shit? The phrase is “I’m spiritual, not religious. ISNR.)

But what exactly does being “spiritual but not religious” mean, and could there be hidden dangers in living such a life? (Yea, lets join a secret killer Catholic cult)

Anyway, the rest of the article is mildly sensible. I have posted it below.

SBNR, my ass. It’s ISNR, assholes!!!!

Here’s the CNN article:

Are there dangers in being ‘spiritual but not religious’?

By John Blake, CNN

June 3, 2010 10:14 a.m. EDT

Being “spiritual but not religious” means you do not need a church or a community, some say. A beach will do.

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

• In survey, more “millennials” identify themselves as spiritual rather than religious
• Jesuit author says spirituality without structure can “lead to self-centeredness”
• Spiritual blogger argues organized religion inevitably leads to tussles over power
• Being a spiritual Lone Ranger fits the tenor of our times, a philosophy professor says

(CNN) — “I’m spiritual but not religious.”

It’s a trendy phrase people often use to describe their belief that they don’t need organized religion to live a life of faith.

But for Jesuit priest James Martin, the phrase also hints at something else: selfishness.

“Being spiritual but not religious can lead to complacency and self-centeredness,” says Martin, an editor at America, a national Catholic magazine based in New York City. “If it’s just you and God in your room, and a religious community makes no demands on you, why help the poor?”

Religious debates erupt over everything from doctrine to fashion. Martin has jumped into a running debate over the “I’m spiritual but not religious” phrase.

The “I’m spiritual but not religious” community is growing so much that one pastor compared it to a movement. In a 2009 survey by the research firm LifeWay Christian Resources, 72 percent of millennials (18- to 29-year-olds) said they’re “more spiritual than religious.” The phrase is now so commonplace that it’s spawned its own acronym (“I’m SBNR”) and Facebook page: SBNR.org.

But what exactly does being “spiritual but not religious” mean, and could there be hidden dangers in living such a life?

Did you choose “Burger King Spirituality”?

Heather Cariou, a New York City-based author who calls herself spiritual instead of religious, doesn’t think so. She’s adopted a spirituality that blends Buddhism, Judaism and other beliefs.

“I don’t need to define myself to any community by putting myself in a box labeled Baptist, or Catholic, or Muslim,” she says. “When I die, I believe all my accounting will be done to God, and that when I enter the eternal realm, I will not walk though a door with a label on it.”

People seem not to have the time nor the energy or interest to delve deeply into any one faith or religious tradition.
–June-Ann Greeley, theology professor

RELATED TOPICS

• Religion 
• The Roman Catholic Church 

BJ Gallagher, a Huffington Post blogger who writes about spirituality, says she’s SBNR because organized religion inevitably degenerates into tussles over power, ego and money.

Gallagher tells a parable to illustrate her point:

“God and the devil were walking down a path one day when God spotted something sparkling by the side of the path. He picked it up and held it in the palm of his hand.

“Ah, Truth,” he said.

“Here, give it to me,” the devil said. “I’ll organize it.”

Gallagher says there’s nothing wrong with people blending insights from different faith traditions to create what she calls a “Burger King Spirituality — have it your way.”

She disputes the notion that spiritual people shun being accountable to a community.

“Twelve-step people have a brilliant spiritual community that avoids all the pitfalls of organized religion,” says Gallagher, author of “The Best Way Out is Always Through.”

“Each recovering addict has a ‘god of our own understanding,’ and there are no priests or intermediaries between you and your god. It’s a spiritual community that works.”

Nazli Ekim, who works in public relations in New York City, says calling herself spiritual instead of religious is her way of taking responsibility for herself.

Ekim was born in a Muslim family and raised in Istanbul, Turkey. She prayed to Allah every night, until she was 13 and had to take religion classes in high school.Then one day, she says she had to take charge of her own beliefs.

“I had this revelation that I bow to no one, and I’ve been spiritually a much happier person,” says Ekim, who describers herself now as a Taoist, a religious practice from ancient China that emphasizes the unity of humanity and the universe.

“I make my own mistakes and take responsibility for them. I’ve lied, cheated, hurt people — sometimes on purpose. Did I ever think I will burn in hell for all eternity? I didn’t. Did I feel bad and made up for my mistakes? I certainly did, but not out of fear of God.”

Going on a spiritual walkabout

The debate over being spiritual rather than religious is not just about semantics. It’s about survival.

Numerous surveys show the number of Americans who do not identify themselves as religious has been increasing and likely will continue to grow.

A 2008 survey conducted by Trinity College in Hartford, Connecticut, dubbed these Americans who don’t identify with any religion as “Nones.”

“I don’t need to define myself in a box labeled Baptist, or Catholic, or Muslim.”
–Heather Cariou, a spiritual but not religious seeker

Seminaries, churches, mosques and other institutions will struggle for survival if they don’t somehow convince future generations that being religious isn’t so bad after all, religion scholars warn.

Jennifer Walters, dean of religious life at Smith College in Massachusetts, says there’s a lot of good in old-time religion.

Religious communities excel at caring for members in difficult times, encouraging members to serve others and teaching religious practices that have been tested and wrestled with for centuries, Walters says.

“Hymn-singing, forms of prayer and worship, teachings about social justice and forgiveness — all these things are valuable elements of religious wisdom,” Walters says. “Piecing it together by yourself can be done, but with great difficulty.”

Being a spiritual Lone Ranger fits the tenor of our times, says June-Ann Greeley, a theology and philosophy professor.

“Religion demands that we accord to human existence some absolutes and eternal truths, and in a post-modern culture, that becomes all but impossible,” says Greeley, who teaches at Sacred Heart University in Connecticut.

It’s much easier for “spiritual” people to go on “spiritual walkabouts,” Greeley says.

“People seem not to have the time nor the energy or interest to delve deeply into any one faith or religious tradition,” Greeley says. “So they move through, collecting ideas and practices and tenets that most appeal to the self, but making no connections to groups or communities.”

Being spiritual instead of religious may sound sophisticated, but the choice may ultimately come down to pettiness, says Martin, the Jesuit priest, who writes about the phrase in his book, “The Jesuit Guide to (Almost Everything).”

“Religion is hard,” he says. “Sometimes it’s just too much work. People don’t feel like it. I have better things to do with my time. It’s plain old laziness.”

Obama’s Plan to Ruin America: Overwhelm the System with the Cloward & Piven Strategy

PLEASE READ THIS!!

This is off the religious topic but very important.

In case you haven’t figured out what’s happening, here’s a wrap-up of Obama’s real agenda. This was allegedly written by one of Obama’s classmates at Columbia University. He is identified as Wayne Allyn Root.

At this point there is no way of verifying that Mr. Root wrote this, that he was a classmate of Obama’s or that he even exists. So take that potion with a grain of salt. However, Google “Cloward & Piven” and see what Glen Beck and others say.

Warning: this may terrify you.

WAYNE ALLYN ROOT: Overwhelm the system

WAYNE ALLYN ROOT

Barack Obama is no fool. He is not incompetent. To the contrary, he is brilliant. He knows exactly what he’s doing. He is purposely overwhelming the U.S. economy to create systemic failure, economic crisis, and social chaos,  thereby destroying capitalism and our country from within.

Barack Obama is my college classmate (Columbia University, class of ’83).

As Glenn Beck correctly predicted from day one, Obama is following the plan of Cloward & Piven, two professors at Columbia University. They outlined a plan to socialize America by overwhelming the system with government spending and entitlement demands. Add up the clues below. Taken individually they’re alarming. Taken as a whole, it is a brilliant, Machiavellian game plan to turn the United States into a socialist/Marxist state with a permanent majority that desperately needs government for survival and can be counted on to always vote for bigger government. Why not? They have no responsibility to pay for it.

– Universal health care. The health care bill had very little to do with health care. It had everything to do with unionizing millions of hospital and health care workers, as well as adding 15,000 to 20,000 new IRS agents (who will join government employee unions). Obama doesn’t care that giving free health care to 30 million Americans will add trillions to the national debt. What he does care about is that it cements the dependence of those 30 million voters to Democrats and big government. Who but a socialist revolutionary would pass this reckless spending bill in the middle of a depression?

 – Cap and trade. Like health care legislation having nothing to do with health care, cap and trade has nothing to do with global warming. It has everything to do with redistribution of income, government control of the economy and a criminal payoff to Obama’s biggest contributors. Those powerful and wealthy unions and contributors (like GE, which owns NBC, MSNBC and CNBC) can then be counted on to support everything Obama wants. They will kick-back hundreds of millions of dollars in contributions to Obama and the Democratic Party to keep them in power. The bonus is that all the new taxes on Americans with bigger cars, bigger homes and businesses helps Obama “spread the wealth around.”

 – Make Puerto Rico a state. Why? Who’s asking for a 51st state? Who’s asking for millions of new welfare recipients and government entitlement addicts in the middle of a depression? Certainly not American taxpayers. But this has been Obama’s plan all along. His goal is to add two new Democrat senators, five Democrat congressman and a million loyal Democratic voters who are dependent on big government.

 – Legalize 12 million illegal immigrants. Just giving these 12 million potential new citizens free health care alone could overwhelm the system and bankrupt America. But it adds 12 million reliable new Democrat voters who can be counted on to support big government. Add another few trillion dollars in welfare, aid to dependent children, food stamps, free medical, education, tax credits for the poor, and eventually Social Security.

 – Stimulus and bailouts. Where did all that money go? It went to Democrat contributors, organizations (ACORN), and unions — including billions of dollars to save or create jobs of government employees across the country. It went to save GM and Chrysler so that their employees could keep paying union dues. It went to AIG so that Goldman Sachs could be bailed out (after giving Obama almost $1 million in contributions). A staggering $125 billion went to teachers (thereby protecting their union dues). All those public employees will vote loyally Democrat to protect their bloated salaries and pensions that are bankrupting America. The country goes broke, future generations face a bleak future, but Obama, the Democrat Party, government, and the unions grow more powerful. The ends justify the means.

 – Raise taxes on small business owners, high-income earners, and job creators. Put the entire burden on only the top 20 percent of taxpayers, redistribute the income, punish success, and reward those who did nothing to deserve it (except vote for Obama). Reagan wanted to dramatically cut taxes in order to starve the government. Obama wants to dramatically raise taxes to starve his political opposition.

With the acts outlined above, Obama and his regime have created a vast and rapidly expanding constituency of voters dependent on big government; a vast privileged class of public employees who work for big government; and a government dedicated to destroying capitalism and installing themselves as socialist rulers by overwhelming the system.

Add it up and you’ve got the perfect Marxist scheme — all devised by my Columbia University college classmate Barack Obama using the Cloward and Piven Plan.

The Catholic Church: The Real Story

This is way tooo funny. More Cathilic bullshit

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VABSoHYQr6k

More Jehovah’s Witness 1975 Bullshit

So, I was poking around various material I have on the Watchtower Society and thinking about the Great 1975 Debacle and several thoughts occurred to me.

My position has always been that since I don’t believe that the Bible is from God, I don’t care what it says that supports your religious belief. Since I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and am now am a disfellowshipped apostate, I find them to be an easy and actually a fun target. They hang themselves with their own bullshit words. Who cares what the Bible says?

Anyway let’s look at the subject of the Watchtower Society predicting that the world would end or Armageddon would come in 1975 several different ways. Today and since 1976 they have claimed that “The Watchtower Society never said that Armageddon was coming in 1975” which again is a flat out lie. I lived the whole thing, as an active Jehovah’s Witness, from its inception in 1966 until it fell flat on its face in 1976.

The place to start is with this fundamental question:  where did the idea of 1975 come from?

From the membership?  Did some enterprising JW on his own, derive the 1975 date and the Organization picked it up and ran with it? No, this whole thing sprang from the leadership.  The membership was fat dumb and happy in 1966 and then the Watchtower Society threw the 1975 thing down and it got serious legs and I do mean serious.

Here’s a good place to start:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqN2XsVhL3Q

This is a talk by Charles Sunutko, a prominent JW given in 1967 at  JW district assembly. Listen to it for yourself.

“Well, Br. Sunutko never says that Armageddon is coming in 1975.”  True, but he sure makes inferences. And how would a good JW, a loyal foot soldier for Jehovah react?

Sunutko calls 1975 “meat in due season”.  He refers to “ a final burst of speed to the finish line. And that’s the year 1975”. Again, listen to the whole talk. Incidentally, I knew Charles Sunetko personally. He spoke at several of our District Assemblies in the early 70’. He did visit my congregation, in Hollywood Florida and gave a talk there.

So, from 1966, the closer we got to 1975 the more hyped up the average JW got. Here’s what we were reading in 1974:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry” May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

I was one of those zealous, door knocking brothers. My wife and her two sisters were regular pioneers.  Pioneers at the time were those who spent 90 hours per month knocking doors, making converts. My wife and I even talked about moving where the need was great. In fact we had planned to buy a house but decided not to, because of what the Witnesses were saying.

But he Witness 1975 bullshit was in full swing way before the above was written. For example, I was reading this from the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

From the same Awake, page 15: “Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.” I graduated from high school in 1968 and did not than go to college then as a direct result of this bullshit. Fortunately, I ultimately did get my degree, but later.

So, surprise, surprise, nothing happened in 1976. The mighty, loving, merciful God Jehovah, I worshipped did not kill you and all other non Witnesses in a horrible way. I must confess, I was a TAD DISSAPOINTED….no, I WAS PISSED!!  But mostly, I was embarrassed. Do you know how many people I had told that Armageddon was coming and how they laughed when it didn’t? Lots.

The funny thing was that I expected something profound from the Watchtower Society in 1976, some explanation, something of substance. Guess what? Disappointed again. But in subsequent years there were several interesting things put out by the Watchtower Society, none of which explained this bullshit, at least to my satisfaction.

You’ve got this from  The Watchtower 12/15/86, page 20:

“The Watchtower of July 15, 1979, came out forthrightly in showing the Scriptural basis for our house-to-house ministry and the importance thereof. Loyal Witnesses moved forward vigorously into the 1980’s! Likely the presence of a small number of apostates had contributed to the slowing down of Jehovah’s work during the last half of the 1970’s—when the average yearly increase in the active ranks of Jehovah’s Witnesses fell to less than 1 percent. However, the annual increase in the last five years has averaged more than 6 percent. Kingdom publishers reached a worldwide peak of 3,024,131 in 1985, compared with 2,179,256 in 1975. Jehovah continues to ‛speed up’ his work!—Isaiah 54:2, 3; 60:22.”

So just as the 1975 hype helped increase membership, the 1975 Amageddon “no show” decreased membership.

Note they say “Likely the presence of a small number of apostates had contributed to the slowing down of Jehovah’s work during the last half of the 1970’s—when the average yearly increase in the active ranks of Jehovah’s Witnesses fell to less than 1 percent”

Idiots, the “apostates” were Jo Ho’ who left after 1975 didn’t happen. One of my biggest regret was not leaving then.  But The Watchtower was not done yet. This is on of several things they published, actually ridiculing those who left after 1975:

From ”—Jehovah’s Witnesses — Proclaimers of God’s Kingdom, Watchtower Bible & Tract Society, 1993, p. 633:

“But some of their (whose?)  time calculations and the expectations that they (whose?) associated with these gave rise to serious disappointments. Following 1925, meeting attendance dropped dramatically…. Again, in 1975, there was disappointment when expectations regarding the start of the Millennium failed to materialize. As a result, some withdrew from the organization…. Although these tests resulted in a sifting… others remained firm. Why?… ‘Those who had set their confidence in Jehovah remained steadfast and continued their preaching activity.’

So, these were “tests?” Did the Watchtower deliberately print lies in 1925 and 1975 to “test” us? Oh, yea, the same thing happened in 1925 by the way.

So what was the “test”? It obviously was “who will swallow our bullshit?.” Why would Jehovah allow His exclusive mouthpiece to basically, lie and see who “remains loyal” or in other words who believe the lie?

To those who remain “loyal Witnesses” you might want to take your own literatures advice”

Awake! October 22, 1973 p. 6:

“Reasonable persons agree that the only fair method is to examine the evidence on both sides, both for and against a disputed theory. That is how one arrives at the truth.”

Look at all the facts and make up your own mind. But remember your arguments with people against their religion. Your’s is no better.

Religious Bullshit and Barry Goldwater

 

My favorite Goldwater quote:

“I am a conservative Republican, but I believe in democracy and the separation of church and state. The conservative movement is founded on the simple tenet that people have the right to live life as they please as long as they don’t hurt anyone else in the process.”

My favorite Goldwater story:

When Sandra Day O’Connor was nominated to the Supreme Court in 1981, some Religious Right leaders suspected she might be too moderate on abortion and other social concerns. Moral Majority founder Jerry Falwell told the news media that “every good Christian should be concerned.” Replied Goldwater, “Every good Christian should line up and kick Jerry Falwell’s ass.”

More Bible Bullshit and Nose Hair

Matt 10:29-31, from the New World Translation, the Jehovah’s Witness Bible:

²⁹ Do not two sparrows sell for a coin of small value? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground without YOUR Father’s [knowledge]. ³⁰ But the very hairs of YOUR head are all numbered. ³¹ Therefore have no fear: YOU are worth more than many sparrows.

Matthew 10:29-31, from the King James Version of the Bible:

“20 do not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father. 30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.

So, a little bird dies, God makes a note and God knows how much hair you have. Boy, in the context of everyday life, this is about the most pointless and meaningless Bible statement ever made.

Just a brief rundown of the day’ news puts this into perspective.: Babies dying, war, car bombs, foreclosures, possible depression, oil leaking into the Gulf, Al-Qaeda  hates and wants to kill us, starvation, people suffering from disease, Nancy Pelosi  giving speeches, the horror of everyday life continues unabated.

And not to mention countless incidents where humans kill each other in various circumstances for various reasons.  Like that transit cop in San Francisco, Johannes Mehserle, who shot an unarmed guy, Oscar Grant and claimed he meant to tazer him. There is compelling evidence that he did just that but the rub is Johannes is white and of course the dead guy is black. So it was obvious racially motivated. Like Ronald Reagan said, you can’t disagree with a black person without being called a racist, so you’re surely fucked if you shoot one.

No matter that several witnesses said Grant was resisting arrest, would not show his hands, was vocally abusive, unruly and had a police record a mile long. He was black, so that was obviously the only reason for shooting him. Of course it was. Makes perfect sense. I shoot at least one black person a day, just because they are black. Cops do it all the time, racist cracker ass crackers.

But I digress. So, Grant is dead on a slab, getting his skull cut open so the medical examiner can weigh his brain (standard autopsy procedure), his family is grieving, the cop who shot him is in jail and really wishing this didn’t happen, but God knows how many hairs Grant has on his head. Even after the medical examiner cut his skull into several pieces. However, the guy remains dead, with no sign or tangible effort from God to alleviate anyone’s pain.

“Oh, he’s in heaven!!” his Mother no doubt sobbed.  No proof of that, but if it shuts her up, it’s good.

But, this whole counting of hairs thing puts me in a quandary. Humans are busy whipping up mayhem and violence here on earth and God is counting hairs and dead birds. Now, Bible believing jerk weeds will say that it means that God sees everything and knows everything about us. OK, great. Still all this death, mayhem and misery keeps happening and no tangible proof that God is doing anything except maybe counting dead birds and hairs.

Just a thought, but I have lost quite a bit of my hair from the top of my head and I seem to be growing it in other places, like out of my ears and nose. So technically the ear and nose hair is on my head, so if, as the Bible says “the very hairs of your head are all numbered” than the hair in my ears and nose, being on my head would also be numbered. So does God differentiate? I mean, does he separate the count, like so many ear, nose, head hairs? And oh I forgot, the other facial hair, you know, the beard and mustache hair.

Why am I babbling on about this seemingly insignificant point? Just because I can because it’s my blog and it is, in fact a significant point. The Bible is all about God and what he is allegedly going to do for the human race that the Bible claims he created. But still, we see no tangible evidence that God even gives a handful of monkey shit what happens to us.

But our very hairs are numbered. Why? As I mentioned previously, Bible believing jerk weeds will say that it means that God sees everything and knows everything about us. Again, why?

“Hey, I know how many nose hairs you have” God bellows from Heaven. Good to know and thanks for all the help down here, by the way.

I am also wondering how often he updates the count? I am loosing hair off my head daily and my nose looks like I stuffed pieces of shag carpet up my nostrils. Does he do it daily, weekly, yearly? How much manpower is involved? Is it all on computer? Is that Nancy Pelosi’s real hair and if not, does he count wig hairs? These questions demand answers.

The being that has the answers evidently ain’t talkin’….… but apparently, fastidious about counting. Hey, does God have OCD??  Maybe he’s obsessively busy counting hairs and dead birds. He’ll get to us when He’s done.

Obama Sucks

     HEY, OBAMA……….

More Religious Bullshit

From an article by Bob Unruh, posted: July 22, 2010, © 2010 WorldNetDaily

“Lose Christianity or face expulsion”

Georgia student told to read ‘gay’ lit, attend ‘pride parade,’ change beliefs

---

“A lawsuit against Augusta State University in Georgia alleges school officials essentially gave a graduate student in counseling the choice of giving up her Christian beliefs or being expelled from the graduate program. “

“School officials Mary Jane Anderson-Wiley, Paulette Schenck and Richard Deaner demanded student Jen Keeton, 24, go through a “remediation” program after she asserted homosexuality is a behavioral choice, not a “state of being” as a professor said, according to the complaint.”

“Also named as defendants in the case that developed in May and June are other administrators and the university system’s board of regents”.

“The remediation program was to include “sensitivity training” on homosexual issues, additional outside study on literature promoting homosexuality and the plan that she attend a “gay pride parade” and report on it.”

The rest of the article is below. Here is the link:

http://www.wnd.com/?pageId=182441&utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

 

Here’s Jen Keeton. May I say she is one hot babe!

The article mentions another student, Julea Ward. Again another hot Christian babe! See her picture below.  It is open season on hot Christians babes? I guess so.

 

So the hot babes are in hot water because they are Christian and they are both in graduate Counselor Education programs.

I am a Constitutionalist and while I am a Deist, not a Christian and detest all religion, as an American these fine, hot babes have a complete right to believe as they wish.

For the school to demand her to “change her” beliefs if in fact they did, is wrong.

But the biggest problem here is that these ladies are enrolled in a program that they knew full well would at some point involve them in counseling gays, women wanting abortions and other activities Christians disapprove of. I mean, what is the Counselor job? Can you counsel only Christians?

How would Christians like it if a gay counselor counseled your son or daughter and played up the gay lifestyle? Or if another Counselor told them smoking weed was OK or having casual sex with multiple partners.

The bottom line is there ladies knew that this situation would come up when they chose Counseling, so I have no sympathy.

Sometimes you make your own problems, particularly religious assholes.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Balance of the WND article:

The lawsuit, filed by attorneys working with the Alliance Defense Fund, asserted the school cannot violate the Constitution by demanding that a person’s beliefs be changed.

University “faculty have promised to expel Miss Keeton from the graduate Counselor Education program, not because of poor academic showing or demonstrated deficiencies in clinical performance, but simply because she has communicated both inside and outside the classroom that she holds to Christian ethical convictions on matters of human sexuality and gender identity,” the law firm explained.

School spokeswoman Kathy Schose today declined to address the allegations in the case but agreed to discuss the counselor teaching program in general.

She cited the American Counseling Association’s code of ethics and said students would be required to adopt its provisions.

“There is a code of ethics that govern counselors,” she said. “They have to abide by the code of the profession.”

Ethics codes generally govern behavior, and Schose denied the school was attempting to alter any student’s beliefs or moral values.

But the lawsuit specifically charges the faculty members targeted Keeton’s biblically based belief system and values, not her behavior regarding the treatment of any clients, which had not yet happened.

“Schenck told Miss Keeton that it was unethical for her to believe that her convictions should also be shared by other persons. … Schenck explained that while Miss Keeton was free to have points of view about how she personally should conduct and define herself, she may not believe that others should adopt the standards she personally is convinced are true,” the lawsuit said.

“Anderson-Wiley confirmed that Miss Keeton will not be able to successfully complete the remediation plan and thus complete the (Augusta State University) counseling program unless she commits to affirming the propriety of gay and lesbian relationships if such an opportunity arises in her future professional efforts,” it continued.

ADF Senior Counsel David French contended a public university student “shouldn’t be threatened with expulsion for being a Christian and refusing to publicly renounce her faith, but that’s exactly what’s happening here.”

“Simply put, the university is imposing thought reform,” he said.  “Abandoning one’s own religious beliefs should not be a precondition at a public university for obtaining a degree. This type of leftist zero-tolerance policy is in place at far too many universities, and it must stop. Jennifer’s only crime was to have the beliefs that she does.”

Keeton’s own e-mail response to the faculty members who allegedly were pressuring her to adopt a pro-homosexual belief system defines the dispute.

“At times you said that I must alter my beliefs because they are unethical. … Other times you said that I can keep my beliefs so long as they are only personal and I don’t believe that anyone else should believe like me. But that is just another way of saying that I must alter my beliefs, because my beliefs are about absolute truth. … In order to finish the counseling program you are requiring me to alter my objective beliefs and also to commit now that if I ever may have a client who wants me to affirm their decision to have an abortion or engage in gay, lesbian or transgender behavior, I will do that. I can’t alter my biblical beliefs, and I will not affirm the morality of those behaviors in a counseling situation,” she wrote.

Faculty members had demanded she “attend at least three workshops … which emphasize … diversity training sensitive toward working with GLBTQ populations.” They also wanted her to “develop” her knowledge of homosexuality by reading 10 articles and increasing her exposure to homosexuals and lesbians by attending “the Gay Pride Parade.”

According to the complaint documentation, which also seeks a preliminary injunction in the case, Keeton asked Anderson-Wiley how her Christian convictions are any less acceptable than those of a Buddhist or Muslim student. Anderson-Wiley responded, “Christians see this population as sinners.”

The complaint alleges Anderson-Wiley specifically told Keeton she was being asked to alter some of her beliefs. The “remediation” program included a statement that Keeton would be dismissed from the program if she chose not to comply, the lawsuit said.

“Unless and until defendant’s unconstitutional speech-regulating policies and threatened … actions against Miss Keeton are enjoined, Miss Keeton will suffer and continue to suffer irreparable injury to her constitutional rights,” the lawsuit said.

Among the alleged violations of the First and Fourteenth Amendments are viewpoint discrimination, compelled speech, equal protection and freedom of speech, it said.

“By conditioning Miss Keeton’s continued enrollment in the (Augusta State University) school counselor master’s degree program on her waiver of rights to speech and free exercise of religion … by requiring that she alter her beliefs and speech, and that she … commit to affirm in a hypothetical future context the ethical propriety of transgender and homosexual identification and behavior by others, as well as other values and behaviors she now disapproves, and which violate her religion convictions, defendants have imposed an unconstitutional condition on Miss Keeton,” the complaint alleges.

“The First Amendment never permits the government to penalize beliefs in this manner,” the complaint said.

The ADF said it also is litigating a case involving a Georgia counselor fired by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention because she would not agree to affirm homosexual behavior. While an earlier similar case at Missouri State has been resolved, there is another in which Eastern Michigan University is defendant on similar allegations.

In the Missouri State case, a social-work professor, Frank Kauffman, eventually was placed on leave as part of a settlement of the lawsuit brought on behalf of student Emily Brooker. The student had refused his assignment to lobby on behalf of homosexual adoptions because it violated her religious beliefs. She then was brought up on ethics charges in the school.

The settlement also included monetary damages and the removal of the charges against her from her record. The school’s own commissioned conclusion in the case found “many students and faculty stated a fear of voicing differing opinions. … In fact, ‘bullying’ was used by both students and faculty to characterize specific faculty.”

In the still-pending case involving Eastern Michigan, lawmakers there considered calling top school officials on the carpet after they expelled from a counseling program a Christian student who refused to argue in support of the homosexual lifestyle.

As WND reported, trouble began for master’s program student Julea Ward when she refused to accept a client whose issue concerned a homosexual relationship.

The school expelled her from the counseling program March 12, 2009, for refusing to abrogate her own personal religious beliefs and support the homosexual lifestyle.

Since then, Ward has brought a lawsuit through the Alliance Defense Fund Center for Academic Freedom.

Members of the Michigan Senate shortly later approved legislation that includes a provision calling on university counseling programs to evaluate and affirm how they can accommodate the religious beliefs of students.

State Rep. Tom McMillin told WND at the time the case was “extremely alarming,” and there was growing support for an effort to penalize universities that don’t accommodate religious beliefs.

“This is a state-taxpayer-supported university,” he said. “She’s got a court case. Hopefully that will be resolved.”

In the case, the judge refused to dismiss the complaint, determining there were “genuine issues of material fact” about the school’s “true motivations” for dismissing Ward from the program. Further, the judge concluded, the student’s actions to avoid in advance a counseling session for which she had reservations probably followed professional ethical guidelines.

---

More Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit.

Could there be any group that is more arrogant and ignorant than Jehovah’s Witnesses? Well, yea the Democrat Party, but we’re talking religion. The Witnesses change their beliefs so frequently and subtly it’s hard for the membership to keep up.

All my Witness life I was taught this, from the Awake,  Oct 8 1968 13-4:

“Jesus was obviously speaking about those who were old enough to witness with understanding what took place when the ‘last days’ began. Jesus was saying that some of those persons who were alive at the appearance of the `sign of the last days’ would still be alive when God brought this system to its end. Even if we presume that youngsters 15 years of age would be perceptive enough to realize the import of what happened in 1914, it would still make the youngest of ‘this generation’ nearly 70 years old today. So the great majority of the generation to which Jesus was referring has already passed away in death. The remaining ones are approaching old age. And remember, Jesus said that the end of this wicked world would come before that generation

 Well, they changed that. And in 1995. I was still a Witness then and they slipped it by me. The references to it were very subtle. They didn’t have a headline that read “Hey, we fucked up on the 1914 generation thing”. They just slide it in here and there. How did I miss that?

 In fact, I didn’t realize it had changed until 2003, after I had left. passed away in death.”

I looked up all the Watchtower published info on the subject and yes what I believed and they taught for decades as shown above is no longer “the truth”. If I had disputed this Watchtower article when it was first published, I would likely been excommunicated or “disfellowshipped”, in Witness speak.

The “Truth” according to the Witnesses changes so much, you don’t know what to believe.

 Interestingly, I still converse with many Witnesses. I am supposed to be shunned, but I have a lot of Witness friends. As a little experiment, I asked five of them if they were aware that the Watchtower Society had changed its teaching about the 1914 generation. Four said no. They were not aware. One said that he was aware, but he didn’t exactly know the new “teaching”.

If you were not a Witness in the last half of the 20^th Century, this likely doesn’t mean a thing to you. But it was central to my beliefs, as a Witness. The clock was ticking as the subject generation aged. It was a huge part of Witness doctrine. And they subtly changed it, slipped it right in there.

The irony gets better with this from little quote. The undisputed champs of the religious change up have the balls to critique the Mormons:

From The Watchtower 9/15/78, page 11:

“The recent Mormon “revelation” that blacks of African ancestry may now enter the religion’s priesthood has left many persons honestly wondering: Who stopped discriminating . . . God, or the Mormon leadership? Church president Spencer Kimball’s letter of explanation to Mormon officials apparently blames God for allowing blacks to remain second-class members of the church for so long: “[God] has heard our prayers, and by revelation has confirmed that the long-promised day has come when every faithful, worthy man in the church may receive the holy priesthood . . . without regard for race or color.”

“However, observers reasonably might ask if the change had a human, rather than divine, motivation. A former Mormon lay high priest who, in 1976, ordained a black to the priesthood and was excommunicated for his action, labeled the recent change a “revelation of convenience just as the decision to stop polygamy [in 1890] was politically inspired.” Indeed it must be asked whether human rights pressure both from within and from outside the church did not influence church leaders, who had based their former race ban on passages in Joseph Smith’s “Book of Mormon” and “Pearl of Great Price.”

“Certainly when religious dogmas are based on man-made, non-Biblical sources, they are bound to be exposed, revealing the very unGodlike qualities of the human source—very different from “the word of the Lord [that] endureth for ever.”—1 Pet. 1:25, “Authorized Version.”

Notice the above says “However, observers reasonably might ask if the change had a human, rather than divine, motivation.”

The inventors of “New Light” have the gall to question the Mormon’s change up.

You can’t make this stuff up. All from Witness Literature. Look it up.

While the Witnesses ask above “Who stopped discriminating . . . God, or the Mormon leadership?”, I would ask who said Armageddon would come in 1914, the end of WW1, 1925, 1975, within the 20th century and before the 1914 generation died, God or the Watchtower Society leadership?

Hypocrites and bullshitters.

More Bible Bullshit: Noah, the Flood and Predestination

Genesis 5:32: “And Noah was five hundred years old: and Noah begat Shem, Ham, and Japheth.” KING James Version of the Bible.So 500 year old Noah, in the pre Viagra days, fathered three kids. Really, what do you do with this? How did they count years? Who the hell knows, but after Noah’s flood life spans interestingly become more “normal”. So, that unanswered question being left unanswered, lets continue: Genesis 6: “And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth.” There it is, the global flood that will kill every living human except Noah, his three sons and their wives, six humans. Ok, so we all know this, if we have had any exposure to the Bible but there is one glaring inconsistency. God gave Noah precise instruction on how big to make the Ark, how it was to be constructed and what provisions to take on board. But he also said this: Genesis 6:18: “But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons’ wives with thee.” For me to make my point, let consider what the Bible says in Geneses 7:11: “ “In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.” So, if Noah lived 500 years and then had three kids and then was told to build the Ark and then the flood came when Noah was 600 years old, it had to take him at least 50 years to build the ark. Of course Jehovah’s Witnesses say it took 120 years and they have some convoluted Jo Ho math to prove it, but it actually matters litte. My point is her is a guy who starts building this huge boat in his backyard. Of course, the people living around him would be somewhat curious. If asked, what would Noah say? “God told me to do this.” It sounded as crazy then as it would sound today.   The Bible also indicates that Noah “preached” in 2 Peter 2:5. So what did he preach about? The Ark and the coming flood? Likely. But at any rate, if he preached or not, lots of people knew what he was doing and why and yet not one person joined him. Not one. And God knew that in advance as he promised Noah in Genesis 6:18 that he and his family would survive. In addition he gave Noah precise dimensions for the Ark and told him to bring provisions for his family. God knew in advance that no one else would be joining Noah. Now, we’ve all seen people join some pretty crazy doomsday cults, some based on the Bible, some not. Wouldn’t it be logical that at least, in 50 years, 6, 10 or 20 additional people would believe Noah’s doomsday message and want to join up. Why did he preach? Was he saying “Hey, you’re all going to die in a big flood but I have a boat. God told me” What would be the point of preaching? To gloat? God knew in advance that no one else would be joining Noah. So, this brings us to the present day. Has God “predestined” those who he will “save”, take to heaven, whatever?  I don’t really know but according to the Bible, we’re already born at a disadvantage: Romans 5:12: “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned” So, as unfair as it is, we are all sinners, through no fault of our own. We were born that way. To top it off, we are all, according to the Bible and every other Holy Book, compelled to search out amongst the thousands of religions and variations thereof, the correct way to please God so that we find the true way to negate the sin that was thrust upon us by birth and get the ultimate reward when we die, live forever, go to heaven or be reincarnated as a pair of Lady GaGa’s lace panties. Since, according to the Bible, God is either continually stacking the deck, or creating a philosophical maze through which we must expend our lives in search of the true “way”. Well, I have decided to opt out. My examination and involvements with religion has been a frustrating waste of my time and most of my life. So, for the remainder, I will debauch myself, enjoying the carnal pleasures and decadence that I have deprived myself of in my earlier years. Besides, if I had lived in Noah’s time I definitely would not have been on Noah’s list, so I’m pretty sure I’m not on God’s list today. To seal my “fate” I am a Deist meaning that I have concluded that there was some intelligence who made all this but I have not proof of anything further. Hell, I don’t even have proof of that. So, fuck all religion. This weekend, I will  drink beer and other various alcoholic beverages a and if all goes as planned be in a hot tub with two naked hot Asian chicks, watching the sun come up over the Gulf of Mexico on Sunday morning.   It beats what I used to do, knock on the doors of perfect strangers and try to get them to read the Watchtower and Awake. Religion sucks. “Hey, honey, pass me another beer”

Glenn Becks 8/28 Rally: Great Except for the Religious Bullshit

Today is the big Glenn Beck rally in Washington. I am writing a post on it when it’s over.

I am a fan of Beck and basically agree with all his points, with the exception of Religion. Religion has no formal place in our Government. More in the next few days.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_dc_rally

More Bible Bullshit – No Sex in Heaven

Genesis 6:1 – 3: “Now it came about that when men started to grow in numbers on the surface of the ground and daughters were born to them, ² then the sons of the [true] God began to notice the daughters of men, that they were good-looking; and they went taking wives for themselves, namely, all whom they chose. ³ After that Jehovah said: “My spirit shall not act toward man indefinitely in that he is also flesh. Accordingly his days shall amount to a hundred and twenty years.”  New World Translation.

Genesis  6: 1 – 3 “And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them, that the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they [were] fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose. And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also [is] flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.” The King James Version

So, it’s like this: In Heaven is there is no sex. Either that or the chicks are butt ass ugly. If not, why did the angels in heaven create male human bodies so they could fuck earth chicks?

If that’s the case, why the fuck would anyone want to go there? To be with Jesus?

More senseless Bible bullshit. There is so much wrong with this. This whole heaven and hell thing continues to make no sense.

Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit: “We Predicted Who Would Win World War Two”

The Watchtower 7/15/60, page 444

“19 Yes, the “faithful and discreet slave” was awake to the coming of 1914. In 1942 the “faithful and discreet slave” guided by Jehovah’s unerring spirit made known that the democracies would win World War II and that there would be a United Nations organization set up. Such wakefulness was concerning events that unerringly took place three years later. At the 1958 Divine Will International Assembly amazing advance information in connection with Daniel’s prophecy was given about events to occur in the immediate future. Such evidence of spiritual foresight is recorded for us in the book “Your Will Be Done on Earth.” Once again the “faithful and discreet slave” has been tipped off ahead of time for the guidance of all lovers of God. Surely one’s present security depends on his staying awake with the “faithful and discreet slave.”

So, the Watchtower Society published in 1960 that ”guided by Jehovah’s unerring spirit” they (the Watchtower Society)  “ made known” that  they (the Watchtower Society) knew that the“ democracies would win World War II and that there would be a United Nations organization set up.”

Also, they were “tipped off ahead of time” about “about events to occur in the immediate future.” This was all in the book “Your Will Be Done on Earth.” Now I was 7 years old when this book was published and for quite a while, leading up to the lying prophesy of Armageddon coming in 1975, this book was key to many of the Jo Ho’s teachings, at the time.

I guess that it’s significant to mention that none of the bullshit contained in this book ever happened. I am referring to “about events to occur in the immediate future.” And the claim that the Watchtower Society knew, in 1942 who would win WW11 and that there would be a United Nations organization set up is total bullshit.

On the formation of the UN, even as the Second World War raged, the leaders of Britain, China, the US and the USSR, under intense pressure from the press and public, discussed the details of a post-war organization. In 1944 representatives of China, the UK, the US and the USSR meeting at Dumbarton Oaks in Washington, DC, prepared a blueprint for an international organization. Towards the end of the war representatives of 50 countries gathered in San Francisco between April and June 1945 to hammer out the final text that would lay the foundations of international cooperation.

But, interesting even though it was common knowledge that the Allies were talking about it as early as 1941, the Watchtower claims to have predicted it in 1942. In fact, on January 1, 1942, President Franklin D. Roosevelt, supported by the representatives of 26 countries, published the Declaration by United Nations, a document that pledged their governments to continue fighting together against Nazi Germany and Japan during the Second World War and alluded to the formation of a United nations Organization. There was plenty of published talk before and after this date of forming a replacement for the League of Nations. So, the Watchtower bull shitters were likely aware of such talk and took the opportunity to claim is as their exclusive prophesy, revealed to them by Jehovah. Even though everyone in and out of government was taling about it.

As far as who would win the war, it was obvious that, if they didn’t lose their will to fight, the Allies had a huge advantage in man power and resources. It was common knowledge that there would be some dark days, but the Allies would prevail. There are numerous historical sources that prove this. Baically, both Japan and Germany would first simply run out of oil. The Allies moved to block their access to oil in both the Pacific and Europe. By 1942 it was evident that the Russians were kicking the Germans ass.

So, the great predictions claimed by the Watchtower Society and Jehovah’s Witnesses, in a vain attempt to again show that they and they alone have God’s approval and he only tells them what’s goingto happen is again shown to be Watchtower Bullshit.

“Oh,” say the deluded Jo Ho’s, “This stuff is ancient history. You have to go that far back to find a mistake the Society made?”

Well, if time is an issue, the Bible is over 2,000 years old and you believe in it. Also, as I have shown form the Watchtowers own literature the Watchtower Society continued to spew false prophesies as late as 1995, when they decide that perhaps Armageddon was not going to come before the 1914 generation dies off after all, as most were already dead and no sign of the end of the world.

Someone accused me of being bitter. I will post a comment made on this blog by an ex Jo Ho. Maybe you can understand how we feel. Maybe not. Personally, I don’t give a fuck.

Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit: The Double Life

This is a fucked up story but it has a lesson to be learned: “Never shit where you sleep”

So, being raised as a Jehovah’s Witness from birth I lived a very restricted life….on the surface. The real truth was that I lived what the JO Ho’s call a double life. I was a good little Witness when they were looking but I was a hell raiser when they weren’t.

The point of this post was that I learned a valuable lesson early in life and it has served me well. One Friday night in the autumn of 1966, I was with some worldly (non-JW friends) and I was indulging in my new found vice, smoking pot. We drank a little and I was making out with this cute little dark haired girl. We were at some kid’s house and of course his parents were not home. I snuck home around 2:00 AM. My parents were so gullible.

Anyway, the next day was Jo Ho door knocking day and we always participated. To make a long story short, I find myself standing at the very door of the very house that, just hours before I had been participating in lust and drug fueled debauchery. Not good.

I was with my Grandmother, one of those bespeckeled Bible thumping types who never took an inch of shit from me. “This is your house” she barked.

I rang the bell, the feeling of horror and dread welling up inside me. “Oh, God, I am fucking dead,” I thought. It was bad enough when you went door knocking that you would often run into a school mate but this was 10 times worse. The seconds ticked by like hours. I listened intently for any sound from within the house.

“Ring the bell again” Grandma beaked. I rang the bell again. My blood ran cold with the sound of the chimes. And it wasn’t just a simple “ding dong”; it played the Big Ben tune. To me it sounded like a fucking symphony orchestra. “God damn,” I thought “That fucking bell will wake the dead”

No response from the house. “Ring it again” Herr Grand-ma-ma ordered. I swear to God, she had been a guard at Auswitch. I could just see her setting fire to some Jewish kid.

Silence. No one came to the door. What did I take away from this? Don’t shit where you eat.” For those of you who are too stupid to get that point let me say it another way: If you are a JW kid and you plan to do stuff that JWs frown upon, do it in another town where it is very unlikely that you will be knocking on the very doors of houses you partied in the night before.

You know, like don’t fuck your Sister in Law. Gee, dumb ass, do ya’ think at some point she might spill the beans? Also, do your skullduggery alone, or with people you trust. And by trust I mean people who will get in at least as much trouble as you will, should you be found out. In that situation it’s like the girl who sits in the Dentist’s chair, grabs his balls, and says “We’re not going to hurt each other, are we?”

Never trust anyone. Never. You see, as a Witness, I actually led a triple life. I was the little goody two shoes around my parents. Secondly, I had some JW friends with whom I would drink and party. But several towns removed I tied up with the really wild bunch and really raised hell. My JW second life friends didn’t know about the third life.

I still screwed up a little. In my second life group there were four of us. One of the guys father was not a Witness, so he didn’t give a shit what we did. He would even buy us beer. No in the Witness subculture, there is the “no tattle tale’ rule. I got the rep of being a double lifer but no one told on me….or so I thought.

There was this piss ass little puke. I’ll call him “Rodney” for the sake of this story. He wanted to get with us and live that cool double life. So we cautiously let him in. For the record I was against it. We had enough guys and I thought he was a fucking pussy. Anyway, one of our scams was that two of us worked at a restaurant and we would steal beer and liquor by hiding it in the trash and coming back after hours and retrieving it. So this one time we let “Rodney” in on the scam and we went back retrieved the liquor and met up with some girls in this abandoned house. One thing led to another and I got a blow job. SWEET!!!

So, we make our way home and it being Saturday, we all knew we would be yanked out of bed for the Sunday Morning Jehovah’s Witness Pubic Talk and Watchtower Study. As usual, I suffered through that two excruciating hours of boring bullshit. But, after the meeting, me and my three double life pals were yanked into the back room. IF you were or are a Witness, you know what that means. The Elders want to talk to you. Trouble.

Now my father, Elder Hitler was there, along with some other Elders, all of which we had nick names for. There was Weasel Dick, Humpty Dumpty (some obese fucker) and one or two others. And there in the middles was limp dick, can’t keep his fucking mouth shut “Rodney.” Of course “Rodney” spilled his guts and the whole scam was blown.  His conscience bothered him. We had to go “confess” to the restaurant owner and of course he fired us. Not a problem though. We got other jobs and the dumpster scam was up and running again in a few weeks. And yes I did get a few more blow jobs.

But the moral here is “don’t shit where you eat”. The less people that know about your shenanigans, the better.

After this, since the Society seemed so damn sure that Armageddon would come in 1975, I began to give the Witnesses some serious thought. Oh, and if you’re a Witness don’t be a 1975 denier. I lived it. This is some of the bullshit we were reading before 1975:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry,” May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

Here’s a fun fact. The membership decreased for the next 5 years, through 1980.

Anyway, I decide to become a zealous Witness at age 19, in 1970 and was totally kicked in the balls when Armageddon didn’t come in 1975. It was then that I began to lose my religion. Unfortunately, I was married to a Witness who had been real hot when we got married but was a fat pig by 1980. I also felt the chains of the socio-economic involvement that you fell. You’re trapped in the Witness subculture.

Gradually, I slipped out of my Witness chains and left in 2000. I stayed way too long. But during my falling away years, my early philosphy served me well: “Don’t shit where you eat”.  I lived  life of grand debauchery but in other states and even in Europe. Have you ever been to Amsterdam? Lots of rockin’ places. I smoked pot, fucked women, partied but not where nayone knew me. Sweet!! Never got caught. By this time I had built up considerable wealth so a divorce would have killed me. Did I have a stash of money that went undetected when I was finally divorced? What do you think. Still, the fat assed Witness bitch she got some significant stuff.

But, to those of you who are presently Witnesses, I say, get the fuck out. Life is short and no one knows what’s next. If not, party on, but not where you live!!

More Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit: The Succession of World Powers

 

Those loveable number benders from Brooklyn, the Jehovah’s Witnesses are at it again. After predicting that Armageddon, or the end of this wicked system of things, would end at 7 distinct times periods in the 20the Century and being wrong 100% of the time, you’d think they shut their pie holes. But not the Jo Ho’s. They’re at it again.

This time it involves the Witness doctrine of “The Seven World Powers of Bible History”. In the Wtachotwer of January 15, 2000, they rattle off all these reason why we are living in “the last days”. Though wrong seven times in the last Century, they still cling to that bullshit. In particular, they ref the following:

The Watchtower 1/15/2000, page 12:

“Third, we are living in the time of the eighth and final “king” mentioned in the prophecy recorded at Revelation 17:9-11. Here the apostle John mentions seven kings, representing seven world powers—Egypt, Assyria, Babylon, Medo-Persia, Greece, Rome, and the Anglo-American dual world power. He also sees “an eighth king” that “springs from the seven.” This eighth king—the last one that John envisions—now represents the United Nations. John says that this eighth king “goes off into destruction,” after which no further earthly kings are mentioned.

The key phrase is that “no further earthly kings are mentioned.” Also, notice that the last “kingdom”, the Anglo-American” or the United States/Great Britain is now in power. The inference is that Armageddon will come before that power is replaced with another kingdom or nation. Remember, “no further earthly kings are mentioned.” meaning that the US/Great Britain as a world power will not be replaced before Armageddon comes, or the end of the world.

So, in that light we have the following articles:

Link: http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2009/may/17/david-miliband-china-world-power

David Miliband: China ready to join US as world power

David Miliband today described China as the 21st century’s “indispensable power” with a decisive say on the future of the global economy, climate change and world trade.

The foreign secretary predicted that over the next few decades China would become one of the two “powers that count”, along with the US, and Europe could emerge as a third only if it learned to speak with one voice.

Here’s another

http://archive.arabnews.com/?page=7&section=0&article=121130&d=3&m=4&y=2009

China is now a world power Timothy Garton Ash | The Guardian

APRIL 2, 2009 may be marked as the day on which, through the catalysis of a global economic crisis, China definitively emerged as a 21st-century world power. Just a few months ago, the talk in Western capitals was still about graciously inviting China to join the Western club of G-7 plus Russia. Now G-20 is widely accepted as the new top table of world politics, and China is already seen as one of the biggest players at that table. The question now is: What kind of world power will China be?Until recently, China’s official policy was of demonstrative modesty — the dragon as gecko. China was outspoken only on issues that related directly to its own economic development and immediate state interests. Now it seems to be moving gingerly beyond the paradigm of developmental modesty. As, in this crisis, the world asks more of it, so it starts to ask more of the world. So, China has already or is very close to over coming the US and Great Britain as the dominant World Power. So, when will it be clear that Jehovah’s Witnesses have fucked up again when they say “the US/Great Britain as a world power will not be replaced before Armageddon comes, or the end of the world.?” Some say they already have.

 

 

 

 

Glenn Becks 8/28 Rally.

I didn’t really get the point Beck was trying to make. Yes, I get the Constitution, out of control spending and immigration, etc., but I don’t get the God thing.

That’s all I really have to say about Becks 8/28 party. While I like him and I have read all his books. I agree with him but at times find him hard to follow. I am not going to elaborate on the God thing except to say that “moral values” are not the exclusive property of Christianity. It is arrogant and ignorant to believe and promote such an idiotic idea.

More from Jehovah’s Witnesses and Their Lying Bullshit.

These are quotes from their own literature where the Watchtower Society prophesied that Armageddon would come at 7 separate and distinct time periods and they were wrong.

1914 – “In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.” (The Time is at Hand, 1902 edition, p. 99) Note: this same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book.

End of WW1: “The present great war in Europe is the beginning of the Armageddon of the Scriptures (Revelation 19:16-20). It will eventuate in the complete overthrow of all the systems of error which have so long oppressed the people of God and deluded the world”. (Pastor Russell’s Sermons, 1915, p. 676) In the same year (1915),

1925 – “The period must end in 1925 . . . [This date] is definitely fixed in the Scriptures. Every thinking person can see that a great climax is at hand. The scriptures clearly indicate that the climax is the fall of Satan’s empire and the full establishment of the Messianic kingdom . . . Therefore, it can be confidently said at this time that millions now living will never die”. (Golden Age, January 4, 1922, p. 217

In the 1930’s -  they had a big campaign by Judge Rutherford: “Millions Now living Will Never Die”. Since only Jehovah’s Witnesses will never die and there are, as of this writing not 2 millions of Jehovah’s Witnesses (remember He said millions) still alive, this is now wrong

1975 – Watchtower, October 15, 1969 pages 622 and 623:

“More recently earnest researchers of the Holy Bible have made a recheck of its chronology. According to their calculations the six millenniums of mankind’s life on earth would end in the mid-seventies…. Would not, then, the end of six millenniums of mankind’s laborious enslavement under Satan the Devil be the fitting time for Jehovah God to usher in a Sabbath millennium for all his human creatures? Yes, indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.”

Notice the use of the definite article “the”. It would be “the fitting time”, not “a fitting time” not “an appropriate time” but “THE FITTING TIME”, to the exclusion of all other times. “Yes, Indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath”. Not “might be”, not “could be”, but “WILL BE”.

Here is what they were saying just before 1975:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

What, you sold your house. quit your job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?

End of the 20th Century – Again in 1971, they said it would come in the 20th century: ”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

Within the life span of the 1914 generation: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

None of the above happened and as of 1995, the above 1914 thing is wrong.

Baptist Bible Bullshit

Does this ever happen to you? For some reason you end up in a church? Ya’ know, wedding, funeral, baby baptism, gang bang…. oh, and for you Catholics confronting the old homo priest who has naked pictures of your choirboy nephew.

Anyway, so here I am in this Baptist church for some bullshit event and of course the event lasts a few minutes and we feel obliged to sit through the rest of the hour, (seems much longer) service.

Now the music is great. I like music. The problem is the songs themselves are religious bullshit songs.  They even did “Jesus Loves Me.”

But the Pastor then launches into this passionate, Bible thumping plea for …..I can’t believe it, money!! Shit, imagine that! A minister begging for funds!! It was like a PBS “begging for money” week without the free Beatles CD and T shirt.

Man did this jerk off pull scriptures out of his holy rolling asshole. “Jeeeezus owns all your stuff!! You would be nothing without Jeeeezzus!! If you tithe, (give the Church 10%) of all your money, you’ll get it back in spades!!”

Later on I went to a buffet lunch at a church member’s house. A lot of people were bitching about the preacher’s blatant money grubbing.

One guy said to me, “Didn’t you used to be a Jehovah’s Witness? Isn’t it great to really have the Lord in your life now?”

Apparently this misguided fuck head assumed that I was now a Baptist. “Apparently you mistake me for a Baptist. No, I’m just here for the one event. But I can tell you this, from seeing both sides of the issue, your Baptist bullshit is no better than the Jehovah’s Witness bulshit.” As I walked away, the dipshit was speechless.

 

 

More Catholic Religious Bullshit

First of all, who gives a shit what the Pope says. I certainly don’t, except that it’s more religious bullshit and as such, great blog fodder.

Anyway, in an article on Yahoo, entitled “Believers find mixed blessings in Pope’s comments” by JEANNIE NUSS of the Associated Press, ”His Ass Holiness” makes some interesting comments.

For example the pope is quoted in an interview given to a German journalist. In the interview, “Benedict says that in certain cases, such as for a male prostitute, condom use could be a first step in assuming moral responsibility for stemming the spread of the virus that causes AIDS”.

“The Holy See’s chief spokesman, the Rev. Federico Lombardi, stressed that Benedict was not “morally justifying” the unbridled exercise of sexuality and the church’s main advice in the fight against AIDS remains the same: promoting sexual abstinence and fidelity among married couples”.

“The pope’s comments caught some follower’s off-guard with the frank discussion of a taboo”

So some strung out homo, in the Pope’s view would be “assuming moral responsibility for stemming the spread of the virus that causes AIDS” by using a condom. I can see that happening. Homo prostitutes all over the world are strapping on the old Trojans in response to the Pope’s admonition. Gays love him. Leaving aside the fact that most gay prostitutes were likely molested by priests as choir boys, I’m sure all will heed.

Like one comment posted said “pedo-priests should use condoms and he should remind them that holy water is not a good lubricant. Ouch, poor altar boys”

But I got to say, Pope-a-dope perhaps the “first step in assuming moral responsibility” would be for you to admit your religion is bullshit. While you’re at it, admit that your assumed position with all its pomp and assumptions of some sort of divine right is total religious bullshit as well.

So, according to news reports of late, the Catholics are wondering why their membership numbers are in the toilet. Could it be that the membership has figured out how full of shit Catholicism is?

The full article can be read here:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101122/ap_on_re_us/pope_condoms_reaction_10

 

 

The Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit Continues 11-28-10.

From the Jehovah’s Witness rag, the Watchtower, 1/15/2000, page 9, the article entitled: “Keep on the Watch”

“Keep on the watch, therefore, because you do not know on what day your Lord is coming.”—MATTHEW 24:42.

Here the Jo Ho’s keep up their continuous drum beat of “Jehovah is going to destroy the world at Armageddon (not the earth, just all the people who aren’t Jehovah’s Witnesses), so all you “loyal Jo Ho’s better keep on the watch.

Not to mention that the Jehovah’s Witnesses have predicted the end of the world, Armageddon at least 7 times in the 20^th Century and have been wrong 100% of the time. I have listed some of their loony predictions at the end of this post.

Oh, but wait! I’m thinking that we actually have another Jo Ho prediction of when God will bring about the end of the world. More from the above referenced article, under the subtitle “Six Convincing Lines of Evidence”:

“Third, we are living in the time of the eighth and final “king” mentioned in the prophecy recorded at Revelation 17:9-11. Here the apostle John mentions seven kings, representing seven world powers—Egypt, Assyria, Babylon, Medo-Persia, Greece, Rome, and the Anglo-American dual world power. He also sees “an eighth king” that “springs from the seven.” This eighth king—the last one that John envisions—now represents the United Nations. John says that this eighth king “goes off into destruction,” after which no further earthly kings are mentioned.

Note: “no further earthly kings are mentioned” after the Anglo-American dual world power, which are Britain and the United States. Meaning exactly what?

A Jo Ho elder recently told me that I better get my shit together (I’m paraphrasing, although a few months ago an Elder said that exact phrase to me) because as the Watchtower says: “after which no further earthly kings are mentioned.” In other words, there will be no world power after the United States and Great Britain because Armageddon will come before there is an eight world power.

Really?

Well setting aside the fact that Jehovah’s Witnesses have been wrong each and every time they predict a time or deadline for Armageddon (again, see below), how reliable is this bit of Jo Ho prognostication? Mathematically, not very. As an aside, this song and dance is getting pretty old for me. I lived most of my life as a Witness, looking ahead or “keeping on the watch” for one deadline or another or some “sign” that never came.

In addition there are so many things wrong with this latest line of bullshit. During the period in history that Egypt, Assyria, Babylon, Medo-Persia, Greece and Rome were “world powers” there were many kingdoms that rivaled each of them, for example Sparta, which is ignored by the Witnesses in their careful construction of the basically flawed bull shit prophesy.

Incidentally, the Witness date of 1914 as being some key to God’s vengeance against non Witnesses is connected to the “7 World Power” bullshit. It’s a whole other post.

But the real question here is what constitutes a World Power? According to the Jo Ho’s, the Anglo/American or Great Britain and the United States would dominate the world and would be in that position when Armageddon came. So, when exactly would the Jehovah’s Witnesses say the United Sates ceased to become the dominate world power?

Since the 1960’s The Soviet Union and the United States have been referred to as the world’s two super powers. It seems that while powerful, the US was viewed by itself and the rest of the world as a “co-World Power.”  What does the Bible say about that? Or rather what does the Jehovah’s Witness twisting of the Bibles words have to say about that little fact? Actually, they have some “King of the North” psychotic babble where they drag some biblical cryptic rant into the 20^th Century and they claim it means Russia. I’m getting that same old headache I used to get when they spewed this shit and I tried to bend my mind around it.

And before some Jo Ho fuck head points out the obvious: “Didn’t the Soviet Union fall?” I would ask why is it that Putin and company still have nukes and Obama is always kissing their ass. Because they are still a potent factor, asshole.

Also, didn’t China and Russia recently decouple their currencies from the United States? What was the “seventh world power” able to do about it? Not a god damn thing! Does this mean the US is no longer the dominant World Power? Look out, boys!! Armageddon is just around the corner!

Not that I, as an American would welcome it at all, but at some point soon, if not already, China and possibly Russia, will surpass the US is many areas. I would call a country a “World Power” if it was economically and militarily dominant or was a clear threat to the U.S. It’s clear that at many points in the 20^th and 21^st Century Russia and China have been in parity with the US in these areas.

So, when this veiled Witness bullshit prophesy fails, what will the Jo Ho’s do? They’ll do what they always do. Come up with another scenario that explains the veiled prophetic statement “after which no further earthly kings are mentioned?”  Who knows, but the brain trust in Brooklyn is no doubt working on an equally preposterous explanation when this one fails.

Get crackin’ boys.  Armageddon ain’t here yet and China is looking more and more like a world power.

_______________________________________________________________ _________________

These are quotes from their own literature where the Watchtower Society prophesied that Armageddon would come at 7 separate and distinct time periods and they were wrong.

1914 – “In view of this strong Bible evidence concerning the Times of the Gentiles, we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of 1914.” (The Time is at Hand, 1902 edition, p. 99) Note: this same statement was contained in the 1908 edition of the same book.

End of WW1: “The present great war in Europe is the beginning of the Armageddon of the Scriptures (Revelation 19:16-20). It will eventuate in the complete overthrow of all the systems of error which have so long oppressed the people of God and deluded the world.” (Pastor Russell’s Sermons, 1915, p. 676) In the same year (1915),

1925 – “The period must end in 1925 . . . [This date] is definitely fixed in the Scriptures. Every thinking person can see that a great climax is at hand. The scriptures clearly indicate that the climax is the fall of Satan’s empire and the full establishment of the Messianic kingdom . . . Therefore, it can be confidently said at this time that millions now living will never die.” (Golden Age, January 4, 1922, p. 217

In the 1930’s -  They had a big campaign by Judge Rutherford: “Millions Now Living Will Never Die”. Since only Jehovah’s Witnesses will never die and there are, as of this writing not 2 millions of Jehovah’s Witnesses (remember He said millions) still alive, this is now wrong

1975 – Watchtower, October 15, 1969 pages 622 and 623:

“More recently earnest researchers of the Holy Bible have made a recheck of its chronology. According to their calculations the six millenniums of mankind’s life on earth would end in the mid-seventies…. Would not, then, the end of six millenniums of mankind’s laborious enslavement under Satan the Devil be the fitting time for Jehovah God to usher in a Sabbath millennium for all his human creatures? Yes, indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.”

Notice the use of the definite article “the.” It would be “the fitting time,” not “a fitting time” not “an appropriate time” but “THE FITTING TIME,” to the exclusion of all other times. “Yes, Indeed! And his King Jesus Christ will be Lord of that Sabbath.” Not “might be,” not “could be,” but “WILL BE.”

Here is what they were saying just before 1975:

From “Our Kingdom Ministry,” May 1974, page 3:
End of the 20th Century – Again in 1971, they said it would come in the 20th century:”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin.” From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

What, you sold your house. Quit your job, sold your stocks, quit college? Hey, who told you to do that?

Within the life span of the 1914 generation: Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg 395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

None of the above happened and as of 1995, the above 1914 thing is wrong.

 

Jehovah’s Witnesses: Cult or Just Normal Religious Bullshit?

At the bottom of this page I have copied a post I recently read on a religious forum. The post is by a religious person who was in what she described as a “cult” and she “escaped”.

For years I have heard the term “cult” thrown around by everyone towards Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons, etc. I was a JW for 50 years and some of this person’s comments below are correct. However, I view the time I wasted as a Witness my fault. Were there “group dynamics” that held me hostage? Only because I let them. As far as the Witnesses go, it’s harder to stay in than leave, in my opinion.

There are people who really feel like the JW’s attempt to exert this mind control thing on the membership. There is the excommunication or “disfellowshipping” where they kick you out for any one of hundreds of rule infractions and you are than shunned by all the members, including family. If you let this bother you, I view it as your problem. It bothers me some when certain members of my family “shun” me but you there are plenty of instances when family members get pissed at each other for one reason or another and they quit talking to each other.

At any rate, I digress to the “cult” thing. Actually the cult references are quite tiresome and very disingenuous. Most people reflexively use the term cult but an honest examination of the term and its contemporary use reveals some interesting points. There are several definitions of “cult.”

The American Heritage Dictionary offers these four definitions:

1-A system of Religious worship and ritual

 2- A Religion or sect considered extremist or false

 3- Obsessive devotion to a person or principle.

4- The object of such devotion.

One or more of the above definitions would apply to all Religions (1,2,3,4) political parties (3,4), anti and pro abortionists (3), any political activist (3,4) 

In terms of Religion, for example the Catholics are 1, a religion, 2, considered false by many, including the JW’s 3, devoted to the Pope and 4 the Church itself is an object of devotion. However, the Catholic Church is not generally considered a cult. 

This whole “cult” thing got legs with the book “Kingdom of the Cults” first published in 1965, by Walter Martin. I’ve read the book and while it is a good source of material, I think the basic premise is flawed and Martin’s “cult” thing is bogus, designed to trash religions he doesn’t believe in. Mr. Martin, while reviling a lot of Religions, Mormons and Jehovah’s Witnesses in particular by calling them cults, has to “bend and shape” the meaning of the word away from the dictionary definition because the dictionary’s definition would include his own religious beliefs. (Note: Mr. Martin died in 1989) 

Martin’s “Cult” book quotes Dr. Charles Braden, author of the book “These Also Believe”: 

“By the term cult I mean nothing derogatory to any group so classified. A cult, as I define it, is any religious group which differs significantly in one or more respects as to belief or practice from those religious groups which are regarded as the “normative” expressions of religion in our total culture” 

So, for Mr. Braden it’s “A cult, as I define it”. By what authority does Mr. Braden get to define a “cult” for the rest of the world? 

Martin adds to Braden’s definition: “a cult might also be defined as a group of people gathered about a specific person or person’s misinterpretation of the Bible”. This is on page one, Chapter one. He then immediately attacks Jehovah’s Witnesses, which leads me to believe he has an ax to grind with them. His conclusions and his book likely would be just as biased as the Witnesses literature. 

And, by what authority does Mr. Martin get to decide what a “cult might also be defined as” for the rest of the world? 

Who decides what is “normative” as in Mr. Braden’s quote or what is or is not a “misinterpretation” as in Martin’s added comment? In Martin’s book, that would be Martin. 

In the logical view, Mr. Martin makes up a definition of “Cult” beyond what the word actually means and rambles on for over 600 pages on his interpretation of things.

 

He presents a lot of interesting facts, but the point is Martin distorts the definition of Cult to fit The Witnesses, Mormons and others, while excluding his brand of Christianity. 

Interestingly, presantly Martin’s daughter, Jill Martin Rische and her husband, Kevin Rische founded the “Walter Martin Ministries” The dictionary definitions 1,2,3 & 4 would apply to them, especially 3: Obsessive devotion to a person or principle. They have a radio show where they feature Dr. Martin as the “Original Bible Answer Man”.

The guys been DEAD since 1989 and he is still answering questions!

No obsessive devotion to a person here!

Jehovah’s Witnesses are in no way led by God or are his mouthpiece as they claim. The contradictions, lies and editing of embarrassing things in their own literature hangs them. But, in my view there is no religious organization that is led by God.

But in all fairness, because Walter Martin defines a religion as a cult doesn’t make it so. By the proper English definition all religious organizations are cults.The continued infighting, hurling of insults, screeching over different theologies all supposedly “based on the Bible” by the multitude of competing “Christian” factions is really tiresome.

_____________________________________________________________________

 

“You don’t realize you’re in a cult till you try to leave. Nobody who believes they have the truth would ever admit they were being deceived, that they were being lied to or were being controlled while they were part of that religious denomination. It’s only when doubts start to creep in, or when honest questions are not answered satisfactorily or when you discover for yourself that things aren’t right, that a person might have the courage to stand back and begin to look objectively at what they had been led to believe.”
http://www.ex-cult.org/bite.html

“One of the biggest single obstacles to leaving an organization that controls its members is fear of losing your family, or loved ones. If you have invested a lifetime of mental and emotional energy into serving an organization and building your entire life around it, then leaving becomes very hard. You will lose all the friends you ever had (because one of the control techniques is to prevent members from having friends outside the organization). Your own family might shun you (because the organization puts pressure on them). You might not be invited to family weddings or funerals. Your husband/wife (if they are still a believer) might want to be divorced from you or prevent you from spending time with your children because they think you have become “a bad influence.”

“Here is a chilling quote from Deborah Layton, a Jonestown survivor: “When our own thoughts are forbidden, when our questions are not allowed and our doubts are punished, when contacts and friendships outside of the organization are censored, we are being abused for an end that never justifies its means. When our heart aches knowing we have made friendships and secret attachments that will be forever forbidden if we leave, we are in danger. When we consider staying in a group because we cannot bear the loss, disappointment and sorrow our leaving will cause for ourselves and those we have come to love, we are in a cult.” You never know you are in a cult until you try to leave them.”

Here are some links that show how cults try to control their members:

http://www.gotquestions.org/cultdefinition

http://www.4witness.org/jehovahs_witnesses
I’m not making any of this up. I’ve seen it happen to others and it’s happened to me. I speak as a survivor.

 

More Jehovah’s Witness Bullshit and all Things Pagan

It’s December 17, 2010, and it’s time for my Jehovah’s Witness/Christmas rant. I do this every year. This is actually a copy of last year, which was a copy of the year before. Basically, I thought it was good and a lot of readers did also. And I am by nature a lazy ass so I just re-posted it. I think it’s funny but some of the jokes I write are just for me, so here it is, in all of its apostate, irreverent glory. 

By the way, I celebrate because my lovely wife, the queen of Christmas, does. And it makes her happy when I do. Also, the celebration of Christmas usually involves liberal use of alcohol (make mine a Crown and Seven)

Enjoy.

It’s “that time of year”. Yes, it’s the Christmas season and time for the Jo Ho’s (Jehovah’s Witnesses) to begin the annual yada yada about “Christmas is pagan in Origin” and “Jesus wasn’t even born in December”. The simple response is “shut your fucking pie holes, who gives a shit!!”, but, other “Christians” get in the act and the Holiday Tradition begins anew as deranged Bible thumpers on many sides of this issue go back and forth about the birthday of a Jesus. They hurl scriptures at each other like so many holy hand grenades, all the while oblivious to the fact that there is no historical evidence Jesus was ever born.

So begins another big fight over when their imaginary friend was born, what he really meant when He wrote “My Big Book of Unsolvable and Improbable Cosmic Riddles”, aka, the Bible and who he likes best.

Being raised a Jo Ho, I didn’t celebrate Christmas until I was 50 and now I do only because my current wife does. I have no history with the holiday and do not believe in Jesus, so it has no significance for me. The truth be known, it’s a pain in the ass. Business stops from approx. Dec 15^th and resumes around Jan 5^th. Most none retail businesses anyway. But the bills don’t stop. So thank you, pagan assholes for giving us this special time of year, which causes financial pain, family feuds and physical pain in muscles you never knew you had, due to putting up all those damn decorations. Oh, and you have to take them down in January. 

It’s interesting to watch the Jo Ho’s get all paranoid and worked up about “things of pagan origin”. Now, they are factually correct. Most of the Christmas customs can be traced to either pagan customs or to religions the Jo Ho’s disagree with, which would be all other religions, but theirs.

However, if you dig deep enough, many customs and traditions that are common place today originated in pagan worship or were adopted by pagans.

For example, wedding and engagement rings. Some scholars believe it was originally an ancient Egyptian tradition symbolizing the eternal life. Today the circle is sacred to many people, representing that which has no beginning or end, except in case of divorce. To me and many others, it represents perpetual alimony.

It is actually said at Jo Ho weddings that the ring has no beginning and no end symbolizing something, what I don’t know, as the marriage bond terminates in death, according to the Jo Ho’s. But it is definitely pagan in origin.

The wedding ring cannot be found in the Old or New Testaments. There was no practice among early Christians to wear finger rings as a sign of marriage or an engagement.  Pope Gregory 1, aka “The Jeweler”, in 860AD decreed that as a required statement of nuptial intent, the groom to be had to give his intended an engagement ring. He further decreed the ring be of gold to signify financial sacrifice. And if you were a good Catholic and bought from his store, you got 10% off. Oh, and if you didn’t buy a ring and/or were a bad Catholic, he had you killed. The guy was a marketing genius! 

Opps! Jo Ho’s do what Pope Gregory decreed!! They buy engagement and wedding rings! A decree from the leader of a religion that isn’t them!! “Pagan origin, false religion…”

The ancient pagan Romans also the used engagement and wedding rings. Originally the ring was placed on the third finger of the left hand because of a superstitious belief that a vein from this finger runs directly to the heart. Wedding rings are still placed on the third finger of the left hand by the majority of wearers. 

The early Methodists in America, followed the teachings of John Wesley that wedding rings were pagan and should not be worn. Mennonites, early Baptist in America, The original Seventh Day Adventists, most of the holiness movements, including the more devout Apostolic Pentecostals rejected wedding rings as pagan. There was a time in America when the majority of Christians did not wear jewelry of any kind including earrings and wedding rings, until a lot of Pastors bought jewelry stores and than it was OK with God.

Cutting the cake together is also a potent symbolic act. As a form of the Great Rite (I don’t exactly know what that is, but it’s something really pagan), the cake represents the feminine traits of nurturing and life-giving while the knife symbolizes the male phallus or as it is commonly known, dick, pee pee, love pistol, wedding tackle, tally-whacker, twigs and berries, meat and two veg, trouser trout, love muscle, heat seeking moisture missle and my personal favorite, the moan inducing love rocket. The pagans thought that this practice boosts the fertility wishes and solidifies the joining together of male and female energies. 

They used a knife as a symbol of a dick. Dicks as a rule are not very sharp, thus while they have many uses, the average dick is not suitable for cutting a cake.  Although I do remember an incident involving cake frosting, licking and my dick, I wouldn’t want to try cutting a cake with it. Also, eating a cake that was cut by someone’s dick tends to put a damper on the joy of the occasion.

The wedding veil is also pagan in origin and was adopted by many cultures who each gave it some religious and/or Pagan significance. Although not directly involving dicks, the origin of the veil is should no doubt repulse the Jo Ho’s but again, they ignore it.  

Bon fires also have a pagan Druidic origin. Bon fires, originally “bone” fires, were used in their pagan ceremonies but did not directly involve dicks. As a side point, it would have worked out good for me if the Jo Ho’s had a bon fire at my first wedding and threw the bride in it.

Most of the names of the Months and Day are pagan in origin, for example January is taken from the Roman God Janus. Have you ever noticed that a lot of the statues of Roman gods are naked, showing their dicks?

So while Jo Ho’s and others decry you Pagan, counterfeit Christians for celebrating a Christmas, a holiday with pagan roots they themselves continue many pagan traditions. 

I can tell you that as a Jehovah’s Witness at Jo Ho weddings, I have personally seen and participated in buying engagement and wedding rings and placing them on the third finger of the left hand of the Bride, except for my second wife, who lost three fingers on  her left hand in a bar fight and I had to put it on her pinky. I also participated in cutting the wedding cake together and my brides wore veils. I might add that these events always ended badly for me, but that’s another story. 

Also, at Jo Ho gatherings there were bon fires, though no brides were thrown in. Also, I frequently used the names of the Days and Months, a practice I continue to this day. 

There are many questions that demand answers! When does all this “Pagan origin” stuff stop? Why do Jehovah’s Witnesses and others avoid, some customs of Pagan origin and embrace others? If the cutting of the wedding cake and what it symbolizes is pagan to the extreme, with sexual overtones, why don’t Jo Ho’s stop doing that?? What other pagan customs involve dicks? 

Did you know Jo Ho’s do not toast, i.e. hold a glass of something up and clink everyone else’s glass in honor of someone or something? Why? 

Jo Hos: “It’s pagan! It’s Ok to cut a cake with a dick, but we will not emulate pagans and clink glasses!! 

Funny, at one Witness wedding, the head Elder, in front of about 200 people stood and proposed a toast with a glass of wine to the bride and groom. His wife had to pull him back down and tell him “we don’t do that” 

Watchtower 1/1/68. pg 31-32:

But is that all there is to “toasting”? Why do the toasters raise their glasses, or lift their mugs and clink them together? Is it in imitation of some custom? Note what The Encyclopædia Britannica, 11th Ed., Volume 13, page 121, says: 

“The custom of drinking ‘health’ to the living is most probably derived from the ancient religious rite of drinking to the gods and the dead. The Greeks and Romans at meals poured out libations to their gods, and at ceremonial banquets drank to them and to the dead.” Then, after showing how such pagan customs survived among Scandinavian and Teutonic peoples, this reference work adds: “Intimately associated with these quasi-sacrificial drinking customs must have been the drinking to the health of living men.” 

“When most people join in a “toast” they probably do not imagine that they might be copying the custom of lifting up a libation or liquid sacrifice to pagan gods, yet that could be so. Without question, a faithful Christian would not share in an actual pagan sacrifice, realizing that “you cannot be drinking the cup of Jehovah and the cup of demons.” (1 Cor. 10:21) A mature Christian would also avoid even imitating false religious rituals. This spiritually mature course would please Jehovah. Remember, God specifically warned the Israelites against copying religious practices of the pagan nations round about them.-Lev. 19:27; 21:5.” 

“If a Christian is going to make a request for divine blessing on another, then an appropriate way to do that is through heartfelt prayer to God, not by following traditions based on pagan worship that Jehovah abhors.” 

No, but he’ll cut a wedding cake with a knife symbolizes the male tally whacker! 

How many Jo Ho’s or other “Christians” would cut a wedding cake with a knife that symbolizes a dick? Hell, they do it all the time. Why? “When most people join in a “toast” they probably do not imagine that they might be copying the custom of lifting up a libation or liquid sacrifice to pagan gods, yet that could be so.” Same with the dick/knife thing, you boneheaded assholes!

People do not know, as the pagan symbolism has long ago been forgotten. Where do you draw the line as to what modern customs with their roots in paganism offend God and which do not? I would think the dick thing is a way bigger sin than the toast thing, but what do I know? 

Shit, I think the Jo Ho’s should cut a wedding cake on Christmas with a male phallus, while hoisting a beer in honor of all things phallic.

Does the general public know that many of the Christmas customs are pagan in origin? If they do it’s only because the Jo Ho’s pound on your door, unceasingly and tell you that among other loony stuff.

If the Witnesses are so all fired up about displeasing God by celebrating a holiday with pagan roots, than STOP DOING ALL THINGS WITH PAGAN ROOTS.

OK, Jesus wasn’t born on Dec 25th. So what! The shepherds were likely indoors hoisting a few, celebrating their dicks, while wearing wedding rings on the 4th finger of the left hand

The inescapable fact is that people normally do not associate Christmas with paganism. So, what is the big deal? And why don’t Jo Ho’s simply shut up about it?

A point to ponder. Jehovah’s Witness do not celebrate birthdays because both times when a birthday is celebrated in the Bible someone righteous gets killed. I forget her name and I’m not going to look it up, but one of the incidents was where this girl danced so good at the Kings Birthday party He promised her anything she wanted. At the urging of her mother, she asked for John the Baptist’s head on a plate.

I would have gone for the veal parmesan, but it was her choice

Another reason Jo Ho’s don’t celebrate birthdays is that Jesus said that the day of ones death was better than the day of ones birth, which I totally disagree with. Death has a way of screwing up your weekend. 

Unlike when your born and you get to lay around all the time, complain loudly at the slightest irritation, eat and poop. It’s like retirement.  Than in puberty, you discover your dick and quickly learn that it has other uses than cutting cakes. You get married, have kids, who as they go through the stages of growth, screw up you life in ways you can’t imagine, wrecking financial havoc on you every inch of the way. Than they discover their dicks. Which is cool for the boy kids, but when the girl kids discover the dicks of other boy kid’s, that’s when the trouble really starts. 

And the whole situation, your life deteriorates from there. Then you die and turn to poop. And they usually dress you up in a good suit, which you turn to poop in. Mmmm, maybe Jesus was right after all.

Back to the point. The Bible does not specifically forbid the celebration of birthdays. Also a lot of things happened when good guys got killed in the Bible. I mean, they were eating and dancing at John the Baptist’s demise. Using Jo Ho logic, you should quit eating and dancing.

They were probably doing things with dicks,  too.

But the Jo Ho’s basically pull the Birthday thing out of their asses and the imagined inference morph’s into “God does not want us to celebrate birthdays.” The birthday thing, at best is a stretch and again using Jo Ho reasoning, the cake/dick thing should be easy to see as a pagan practice to be abhorred. But, every Saturday, around the world hundreds or even thousands of Jo Ho couples get married, after buying engagement and wedding rings, than placing them each others fourth finger of the left hand, cutting the wedding cake together, with the dick-knife, all the while with the brides wearing veils.

Did you know Jo Ho’s don’t eat blood? But they are allowed to eat meat. That red stuff moving around in the package of steak at the supermarket ain’t tapioca. It is not possible to get all the blood out of meat, not matter how well you drain it. So, don’t eat meat.  But they do. “Those are the meat juices”, my mother would say.

Yea, and that was a cake knife you caught me playing with in the shower.

Consistency would go along way toward helping  Jo Ho credibility.

What’s the Point?

What is the point of all this?

This guy, Theodore Evans evidently a scientist or some stoner with way too much time on his hands spent a lot of time studying the Australian social spider, where the young eat their mother. After a mother spider lays a clutch or 40 eggs, she cannot reproduce again. In summer, the mother collects some large insects and all the spiders feast. The mother fattens herself up on the leftovers and nutrients from the eggs inside her body gradually seep into the mother’s bloodstream. As the young spiders get hungrier, they suck the nutrient-rich blood from their unresisting mother’s leg joints and suck the mother dry. When she becomes too weak to move, her young attack her and inject her with venom and digestive juices before eating her.

(http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1511/is_n11_v16/ai_17643223 and http://www.abc.net.au/science/k2/moments/gmis9823.htm

Another fun fact is that females of the hump earwig, Anechura harmandi, are completely consumed by their offspring at the end of their care.

And as most of us know the Black Widow always kills its mate after mating and so does the Praying Mantis.

Praying Mantis males usually attempt to flee right after mating to escape becoming dinner. Sometimes the female will try to eat her mate even before the mating process is complete. In fact, the female eating the head can cause the male to ejaculate faster. The male can continue copulating and inseminate the female, even headless.

I usually attempt to flee right after mating myself, the old sick mother routine or I have someone call my cell phone and fake an emergency. That’s a hard one to time right. As far as the female eating my head to cause me to ejaculate faster, I thought the whole idea was to ejaculate slower, but hey who knows how bugs think.

As I live and observe the human condition, I see many parallels. It seems to me that in one way or the other your kids and/or your wife always consume you and your wife is then consumed by the kids and grandkids. Then the kids have kids and the process continues.

It makes one wonder, just exactly what is the point of this whole fucking mess. If parents did not have an overwhelming instinct to protect their young, we’d leave them in the woods after a few days. All they do is poop, eat and scream. And they can’t even get a job! Little shits. You have to modify your life in so many ways I can’t count them all. And this is an eighteen year project, if they don’t go to college.

And most people don’t quit with one. Fuck no. They crank out 2, 3, 4 or more. So the eighteen to twenty two years stretches to thirty or more. Idiots

I guess my point is that if we have kids and basically expend our lives raising them so that the process can simply repeat itself endlessly, what exactly is the point.

I have a close friend has broken the chain. He is late 40’s, never married, no kids and is pretty much a whore master. You’d think he’d be loving life and he is, but lately he has been sounding like he regrets never having kids, etc.

I swear I am going to knock his ass out and leave him in the woods.

 

Funny Religious Bullshit

From the comic strip “Non Sequitur” by Wiley Miller.

More Bible Bullshit: The Greatest Trick Satan Ever Pulled….

I am always amused some religious asshole says the old, overused, phrase to us “non-believers”:

 “The greatest trick the Devil ever played was convincing people he does not exist.

As a Deist, I have concluded that God/Intelligent Design “created” our universe. Nature and science tell me that. The same set of facts and observations tells an Atheist there is no God, a Christian that Jesus is all powerful and a Muslim that Allah is indeed kind and merciful. None of us can prove any of this bullshit.

The “Devil” is a Biblical figure and while the Muslims do believe in Satan, Islam has its roots in the bible so I am assuming we are all talking about the very same Satan.

Did he convince us all people that he did not exist? Of course not, as the phrase is exempting the Bible advocate or believer, as they do indeed believe in the Devil as a real personage, the personification of evil. But, did he, in fact “convince” the rest of us that he did not exist? Did he convince you? How exactly did he do that?

If the Devil appeared to me and tried by some sort of logic or argument to convince me of his non existence, his very appearance would likely convince me or anyone else that he, in fact DID exist. I don’t recall talking to Satan about it, in fact I don’t recall ever seeing Satan or hearing of anyone with any credibility say they saw and spoke to Satan.  So in a way it actually makes some sense. I mean, if I were the Devil it would definitely work to my advantage to convince all of you I did not exist so that I can stealthily pervert and mislead mankind.

Dude, I could get into some debauchery. What a great job! But I digress.

“There you go!!” The Bible thumper exclaims “Exactly my point!! You’re convinced he doesn’t exist! His trick worked on you!”

I’m a little confused. Satan exists and the proof is that we have no proof of his existence.

 Well, maybe we do have some type of proof. In a reference to Televangelist Oral Roberts, the Awake magazine, 3/22/88, pg 5, said: “One time he regaled his TV audience with a harrowing tale that ended happily. The Devil came into his bedroom and grappled with him. As Roberts reported it: “I felt those hands on my throat, and he was choking the life out of me. I yelled to my wife, ‘Honey, come!’ She came in and commanded the devil to get out. I began to breathe and came out of my bed strong.”  Well, Mrs. Roberts can obviously kick Satan’s ass, so there ya go! Get her to get rid of him. This all powerful personage who is responsible for all the evil in the world, gets wupped by a middle aged fat woman.  But wait a minute! If Satan’s greatest trick was to prove he didn’t exist, he must be highly pissed at old Oral for “outing him” to his TV audience.   

“Oh, there are Satan worshippers who communicate with demons all the time!!”

I’m sure there are. Of course this usually involves some combination of drugs, alcohol and sleep deprivation.  I had the interesting experience in my youth of being invited to a Native American Peyote ritual, where you basically smoke peyote and stay awake for several days. After 24 hours, you’re barking at the moon and talking to your dead relatives. At one point, I was convinced that one of the three stooges was actually my father (I can’t remember which one, but I was hoping for Curley) and Lee Harvey Oswald was still alive and worked at a Toyota dealership in Anaheim, California. An appearance by Satan would not have seemed out of place.

We have more proof that Big Foot and UFO’s exist than Satan, but taking this line of reasoning further, we have no proof of a lot of things, so they must exist too. The ancient City of Atlantis, the Loch Ness Monster, the human soul, the list is endless. Bill Gates! I mean, have you ever actually met the guy??  Exactly!

Does “evil” exist in our world? I think there is an argument for that. There is some pretty bad stuff going on. There are some truly evil dudes, who do in fact perpetrate some truly evil shit. Well, who created everything? The Bible says God did. By extension, he created evil.

“Oh, no!” Bible Thumpers retort, “he simply gave man the capacity to choose to be evil or not. The Devil made us evil!” 

Well, God created the Devil. If we have our own choice to be good or evil, than God gave us the option to choose. Did he give humans the option to fly or to be invisible, to live underwater, breathing through gills? No. Actually, in the natural world, we really don’t have a lot of options. But someone damn sure gave us the option to be bad. Logically, it would have been God.

Bible believers stumble over this point because while it is evident that evil exists, they maintain it is caused by Satan. Satan is a convenient scape goat, because we surely cannot blame God for the creation of evil or for anything bad.  Well, he created Satan, so around we go again, circular reasoning.

Who created what and therefore is responsible for whatever the creation does is an amusing argument. Circular, in that it has no answer, the old “chicken and egg” routine. It’s like the assertion that Satan exists and the proof is that we have no proof.

My real point in this whole exercise is not weather or not Satan exists. The point is that people believe that something exists BECAUSE there is no proof. Where do they get the notion of this evil being? From “My Big Book of Improbable stories and Pure Bullshit, aka The Bible. It is precisely because humans are so pliable and gullible that Organized Religion exists to plunder and profit from the hopelessly brain dead but devoted to the death masses.

Religion needs faith because it has no facts. It goes so far as to say that having no facts proves something is a fact.  There is absolutely no proof that God wrote the Bible, that Jesus ever existed or that there is such a personage as Satan the Devil.

As a Deist, I have concluded that there is a God/Intelligent design. I use the term “I have concluded” because if I say I believe in God, I think that implies that I have faith in something I have not seen. That’s simply not true. Did the “God” I think exists, because of my observation of nature, create a wicked personage, Satan, if you will who is the one responsible for the suffering in the World? How the hell am I supposed to know? Guess what? You don’t know either.

Perhaps “God” simply created us with the capacity to do wrong, to hurt others to do evil so he could observe the result.  In turn, we invented the individual Satan to personify or “put a face” on all the bad stuff. The Devil made me do it! Again, I don’t know and neither do you. Maybe we are some giant cosmic high school experiment in some galactic Petrie dish. Hey, in the Men in Black movie they fit a whole galaxy in a small bottle on a cat’s collar. There is no proof, so it must be true!

Hey, but what do you want from a guy who’s father was probably Curley from the Three Stooges. Did you know his real name was Jerome Horowitz? Hmm, does that make me Jewish?

 

The United States is Bankrupt and Fucked

This post is a little off the religious topics but I felt like I had to share.

When 51% of the American citizens get all or a good part of their sustenance or financial support from the Federal Government and since this is a government by majority rule, how do you expect to get a majority to vote against their self interests? At this point, the hack self serving politicians will continue to increase the payouts, via government programs or agencies to these blood suckers and subsequently continue to get elected.

Once the Government gives someone something, it is almost impossible to take it away. If any politician tries, it’s political suicide. Look at the riots in Greece. Do you know why they were rioting? The government wanted to increase the retirement age from 62. When I first saw reports of the rioting, I thought that there must be some real problem there, food shortages, something. But 20 and 30 years olds were mad because the retirement was being raised to 62.

Greece is broke because it kept giving its people stuff until it became unsustainable. At some point the revenues collected do not equal the payouts promised so Governments, including ours borrows money. The politicians “kick the can down the road” instead of addressing the problem early, when perhaps they can fix it with a minimum amount of pain.

The can can’t be kicked much farther. This is the present state of the United States.

I was once asked to consult with a company that was in serious financial trouble. As a side point, if you are ever asked to do something for a troubled company, get paid in advance. Anyway, one of the principals of the Company made the statement: “What if we’re already dead and don’t know it?” Interesting observation and as it turned out, accurate.

The point being that somewhat complex economic enterprise, such as a 100 employee manufacturing company, can have problems that are not clearly discernable and eventually, if not recognized and dealt with,  these problems cause the company to go belly up. In one case, the sales staff had received some faulty direction from sales management. The sales manager decided to restructure their bid process. However he left out or miscalculated some important components and as a result they began to lose money on virtually every sale. This oversight or better said the lack of oversight of procedures broke them in 3 months.  

Well if a small business can hit the wall so quickly, how about a government like the United States with a much larger economic system with way more moving parts? Add to this dynamic the fact that the decision makers are not spending their own money and realize that their job depends on votes they get from people who like what they are doing. Who doesn’t like a guy or lady who gives them stuff like money, free medical care, free housing etc?

As a Republican, Conservative, and Tea Party Member, our party and the Tea Party are opposed to government overspending. We want smaller Government and more responsible spending. But curiously, I was involved in a Tea Part meeting where several retired people railed against the possibility that the US Government was going to mess with their Social Security and/or Medicare.  Those are two of the costliest and out of control programs on the Federal Budget. They have to be modified but likely won’t be. Not even with the new Republican House.

In short, we’re fucked. This year, 2011 California, Illinois and /or New York will go broke and ask for a federal bailout. I say fuck them. I don’t want a cent of my tax dollars bailing out these spendthrift havens for welfare, illegal aliens and grossly overpaid public sector union employees.  

Of course, George Bush left quite a large national debt, which Obama has managed to quadruple in just two years.

The right, particularly Glenn Beck says that this is all a part of the “progressives” plan. Progressive is a new term liberals call themselves. There is plenty of evidence that he is correct.

Do you know what the Cloward and Piven Plan is?

From Cloward-Piven.com, http://cloward-piven.com/

“Cloward-Piven is a strategy for forcing political change through orchestrated crisis.

The strategy was first proposed in 1966 by Columbia University political scientists Richard Andrew Cloward and Frances Fox Piven as a plan to bankrupt the welfare system and produce radical change. Sometimes known as the “crisis strategy” or the “flood-the-rolls, bankrupt-the-cities strategy,” the Cloward-Piven approach called for swamping the welfare rolls with new applicants – more than the system could bear. It was hoped that the resulting economic collapse would lead to political turmoil and ultimately socialism.”

“The National Welfare Rights Organization (NWRO), founded by African-American militant George Alvin Wiley, put the Cloward-Piven strategy to work in the streets. Its activities led directly to the welfare crisis that bankrupted New York City in 1975.”

 “Veterans of NWRO went on to found the Living Wage Movement and the Voting Rights Movement, both of which rely on the Cloward-Piven strategy and both of which are spear-headed by the radical cult ACORN. “

“Both the Living Wage and Voting Rights movements depend heavily on financial support from George Soros’s Open Society Institute. “

Beck and a lot of others say that Obama and his posse are following the plan. Look at what Francis Fox Piven says:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIaUFdbW8X4 

Hey, “We’ve got Obama!” From avowed Socialist Francis Fox Piven, co-author of the Cloward and Piven Plan explained above. Here’s another FFP You Tube video. In fact search You Tube and see all that she says. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFl66VjfzYE 

And just for fun  here is an eye opener on the folks, Democrats who were supposed to be watching Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MGT_cSi7Rs&feature=related

The above is all true and I would encourage you to research these issues and make your own choices.  

However, personally, I think it’s way too late. I don’t think the new Republicans will do anything really meaningful and in the next election, Obama will get another term. That will seal our fate. 

The sad part about all this is that these “progressives” know exactly what they are doing. When Obama extended the Bush tax cuts look at what he said. Basically he knows that raising taxes is bad for the economy.  They all know this. None of them have the balls to fix it.  

As a parting shot, here is a neat video from an enterprising young woman:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xq9OXjLSGOQ&feature=fvw

 

The Asshole Governor of Alabama, Robert Bently and His Religious Bullshit.

From an article in  Yahoo News By  JAY REEVES, Associated Press Jay Reeves, Associated Press – Tue Jan 18, 11:39 pm ET

The link and the complete article follow my ranting.

“BIRMINGHAM, Ala. – Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley told a church crowd just moments into his new administration that those who have not accepted Jesus as their savior are not his brothers and sisters, shocking some critics who questioned Tuesday whether he can be fair to non-Christians.”

“Anybody here today who has not accepted Jesus Christ as their savior, I’m telling you, you’re not my brother and you’re not my sister, and I want to be your brother,” Bentley said Monday, his inauguration day, according to The Birmingham News.”

What a fucking, ignorant, asshole piece of dog shit. Bentley, you fuck head.

There is so much wrong with this statement I don’t know where to begin. In fact, it’s obvious to most of you so I won’t bother.

So I guess if he had the power, he would force all citizens of Alabama to go to his church and embrace his brand of Christianity, just like most Islamic countries force their population to embrace Islam.  Oh yea, that’s Constitutional. Just what the founding fathers had in mind.  

I am a Republican, Conservative and a Tea Party Member. I am not religious. I don’t give a fuck what your religion is except I do believe that Islam is in general radical. This is one of my biggest complaints with the Republicans. There is an extreme religious element that is trying to seize the parties platform. What the fuck?

Hey, religious ass holes, STOP! Most Republicans I know are not religious. Besides, you are not going to “convert” anyone. Now asshole Bentley has simply given the left more material to use against us and of course they will all paint us with the same radical religious brush.

So here are some thoughts to ponder from the founding father Thomas Jefferson,  as you religious fuck heads shriek about the Constitution and how “un-Constitutional” this and that is. I agree whole heartedly about the Constitution and how Obama is circumventing it.

From Thomas Jefferson, Notes on Virginia, 1782

“Millions of innocent men, women and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined and imprisoned; yet we have not advanced one inch towards uniformity.”

From Thomas Jefferson, Autobiography, in reference to the Virginia Act for Religious Freedom

“Where the preamble declares, that coercion is a departure from the plan of the holy author of our religion, an amendment was proposed by inserting “Jesus Christ,” so that it would read “A departure from the plan of Jesus Christ, the holy author of our religion;” the insertion was rejected by the great majority, in proof that they meant to comprehend, within the mantle of its protection, the Jew and the Gentile, the Christian and Mohammedan, the Hindoo and Infidel of every denomination.”

My favorite quote though is from Barry Goldwater, who firmly believed in the separation of church and state. When Sandra Day O’Connor was nominated to the Supreme Court in 1981, some Religious Right leaders suspected she might be too moderate on abortion and other social concerns. 

Moral Majority founder Jerry Falwell told the news media that “every good Christian should be concerned.” 

Replied Goldwater, “Every good Christian should line up and kick Jerry Falwell’s ass.

Let’s dig up the old bastard Falwell and kick his now worm eaten ass. At the same time, there is a line forming to kick Bentley’s ass.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_alabama_governor_christians

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. – Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley told a church crowd just moments into his new administration that those who have not accepted Jesus as their savior are not his brothers and sisters, shocking some critics who questioned Tuesday whether he can be fair to non-Christians.

“Anybody here today who has not accepted Jesus Christ as their savior, I’m telling you, you’re not my brother and you’re not my sister, and I want to be your brother,” Bentley said Monday, his inauguration day, according to The Birmingham News.

The Anti-Defamation League on Tuesday called Bentley’s remarks shocking.

“His comments are not only offensive, but also raise serious questions as to whether non-Christians can expect to receive equal treatment during his tenure as governor,” said Bill Nigut, the ADL’s regional director.

Speaking at Dexter Avenue King Memorial Church after the official inaugural ceremony, Bentley told the crowd that he considered anyone who believed in Jesus to be his brothers and sisters regardless of color, but anyone who isn’t a Christian doesn’t have that same relationship to him.

“If the Holy Spirit lives inyou that makes you my brothers and sisters. Anyone who has not accepted Jesus, I want to be your brothers and sisters, too,” Bentley said.

After his speech, Bentley said he did not mean to insult anyone.

Responding to questions about it, Bentley’s office released a statement Tuesday saying he believes “he is the governor of all of Alabama.”

“The governor clearly stated that he will be the governor of all Alabamians — Democrat, Republican and Independent, young, old, black and white, rich and poor. As stated in his (inaugural) address, Gov. Bentley believes his job is to make everyone’s lives better,” the statement said.

Ashfaq Taufique, president of the Birmingham Islamic Society, told The Birmingham News he wasn’t sure how Bentley’s remarks were intended.

“Does it mean that those who according to him are not saved are less important than those who are saved?” Taufique said. “Does he want those of us who do not belong to the Christian faith to adopt his faith? That should be toned down. That’s not what we need. If he means that, I hope he changes it. We don’t want evangelical politicians. They can be whatever in their private life.”

The official with the Anti-Defamation League, which fights discrimination against Jewish people, said it sounded like Bentley was using the office of governor to advocate for Christian conversion.

“If he does so, he is dancing dangerously close to a violation of the First Amendment of the U.S. Constitution, which forbids government from promoting the establishment of any religion,” Nigut said