From the Watchtower of 9/1/89, page 19:

Only Jehovah’s Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the “great crowd,” as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil.

The “impending end of this doomed system” is Armageddon. So, this event was “impending” in September of 1989, 22 years ago as of this writing.

But 18 years earlier, or about 40 years ago, as of this writing they said:

”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”. From: The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah – How? 1971 p. 216”

So, “shortly” is 40 years? Borrow a hundred bucks from a Witness and tell him you’ll pay him back “shortly”.

But it gets even better….or worse, depending on your point of view:

Also, at age 18 I was reading this from the Jehovah’s Witness Awake magazine, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

From the same Awake, page 15:

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

Well, I turned 60 this year and am considering retiring. I have a degree as I attended college over the objections and “counsel” of Jehovah’s Witness Elders. So, I have fulfilled a career, in fact I have started and sold five companies and I am working on a fifth, which I may or may not do, as I have more than enough to retire. I just don’t want to right now. My “career” and thus my success and present favorable financial position were due in a large part to my degree.

So, in my case the Watchtower was wrong. I know many Witnesses from my generation who did not go to college and instead devoted their lives to the Watchtower Society and its teachings. Oops, the Watchtower Society has no retirement plan. Sorry about your luck.

These poor suckers fell prey to the Watchtower “Armageddon is just around the corner” bullshit.

Assholes

It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine

From the R.E.M. song, “It The End of The World”

Boy, Jehovah’s Witnesses are having a field day with the latest world events. And I think I agree with them on certain aspects.

Obama is obviously out to destroy to United States capitalist system and turn the US into a European style Socialist State. He may even have higher aspirations, like becoming a dictator and naming himself President for Life.  If you read all the stuff out there about what’s going on, not just the lame stream media, but FOX news as well and read up on The Cloward and Piven Plan and Saul Alinsky’s “Rules for Radicals”, it should become obvious that Obama is following their strategy to the letter.

And what is that, you may ask? Over load the economy with bloated government and debt until it crashes. When it can no longer pay entitlements, you have a vast army of “now not being paid” welfare recipients, food stamp users, illegal aliens and other such blood sucker that you can turn on “the rich”, cause widespread chaos, seize our guns and Obama can be the hero to the rescue with a “New America”.

In the meantime, we lose sight of Iran and other such rogue states amassing nuclear arsenals, China and Russia’s growing militarism, Islam gaining a strong foothold in many countries and a host of other such stuff that the US, by its very presence and power now keeps in check.

Islam is not a religion. It’s a socio-economic system, a government, with its own set of rules, i.e. Sharia Law. Its stated purpose is to convert or kill everyone in the world. And it is making progress.

The end of the world. Very possible.

Well, time for the Jo Ho’s to get in high gear as they await the end, which has been “just around the corner” for decades.

For example, they predicted the end of the world would happen at seven distinct times in the 20^th Century. I personally was a Jo Ho and lived through the last three predictions, 1) 1975, 2)before the end of the 20^th Century and 3)before the generation born in 1914 died off.

Of course none of this happened. So, now there is no Jo Ho defined time, date or time period. Just the general “it’s right around the corner”.

Well, I would guess that if you predict the end of the world enough times, you are bound to be right once. If you are the Jo Ho’s it just might not happen as you expect. In short they expect God to destroy the world, kill everyone but Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Jo Ho’s will live on a cleansed paradise earth. Oh and they will be perfect and immortal. Great work, if you can get it.

Sorry, JW’s but after you record of being 100% wrong I would have to say that you are basically still full of shit. Oh, the world may “end” in some sort of nuclear holocaust, initiated by any number of scenarios, there may be a worldwide epidemic, there may be a prolonged ground war between Islam and the non crazy people and again there are many non nuclear scenarios.

Likely there will be survivors and civilization will be altered or changed completely. But an earth populated by all the Jo Ho’s, ruled by God and everyone living disease free and remaining young forever? Not likely.

More like a ravaged countryside with roving bands of people either trying to survive or violently preying on the weak. Perhaps there will be portions of countries that still exist trying to expand their territory. Whichever of the numerous possible scenarios play out, basically the prospect are very unpleasant.

If you are not prepared and have the resolve to protect yourself and your loved ones, likely you will be someone’s prey. Civil unrest, violent armed confrontation and perhaps racial wars are coming to the US and many parts of the world.

I chuckle to myself whenever I think of the arrogance of the Jehovah’s Witnesses: “Yes God is going to only save us. He is going to kill the rest of humankind.”

I know this is their thoughts as I used to be them and that’s what they are taught. Keep thinking that way, Jo Hos. You’ll be the first prey.

When I answer on these blogs or articles, I usually refer to myself as an ex Jehovah’s Witness who is no stranger to “end of the world “bullshit as the Witnesses have predicted the “end of the world “ or Armageddon seven times in the Twentieth Century.

“Oh no, that’s not true, you apostate son of a bitch” the Witnesses will reply. They don’t use these exact words but you get the point. And I am an Apostate fucking asshole, thank you very much. My late mother was, until her death, a  deluded Jehovah’s Witness and she was not a bitch. Deluded and religiously phsyco, but not a bitch.

So I have put together a canned response to Jehovah’s Witnesses, which I will start posting today, quoting three of their prophetic spewing that I personally lived through, with quotes from their own literature so they can check form themselves.

Jehovah’s Witnesses predicted that Armageddon would come in 1975. I lived this. Here is a quote from “Our Kingdom Ministry”, May 1974, page 3:

“Yes, since the summer of 1973 there have been new peaks in pioneers every month. Now there are 20,394 regular and special pioneers in the United States, an all-time peak. That is 5,190 more than there were in February 1973! A 34-percent increase! Does that not warm our hearts? Reports are heard of brothers selling their homes and property and planning to finish out the rest of their days in this old system in the pioneer service. Certainly this is a fine way to spend the short time remaining before the wicked world’s end.—1 John 2:17.”

So what would make anyone sell all their stuff in 1974? And the Watchtower Society/Jehovah’s Witnesses ask : “Does that not warm our hearts?’.

Also, check your Watchtower, October 15, 1969, pages 622-3.

They also said it would come before the end of the 20th Century. In 1971, in the Book “The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah” – How? 1971 p. 216 it says:

”Shortly, within our twentieth century, the “battle in the day of Jehovah” will begin”.

Also, at age 18 I was reading this from the Awake, May 22, 1969 page 15:

“All the evidence in fulfillment of Bible prophesy indicates that this corrupt system is due to end in a few years. Jesus foretold “This generation will by no means pass away until all these things occur”.

“Therefore as a young person you will never fulfill any career that this system offers.”

Also, we have this from The Watchtower, 7/1/69 pg395:

“People who were only just old enough to understand what was happening to the world in 1914 are now approaching seventy years of age. Yes, the numbers of that generation are dwindling fast, but before they all pass away this system must meet its end in the war of Armageddon.”

In 1995, they changed their interpretation again, from the Watchtower,  11/1/95, pg 19-20

So from their own literature they predict the end of the world:  1) in 1975 2) before the end of the 20^th Century and 3) before the gen alive in 1941 died off.

All bullshit. So to Jehovah’s Witnesses, I say look it up on your Watchtower Library CD. Read it and weep, deluded fuck heads.

I sit in my recliner, with my laptop and a 12 pack of Corona  Light. I may switch to Crown and Seven-Up later on, if the world doesn’t end.

Just to clarify, Camping says that we are going to have sort of a “rolling  rapture” as God’ Chillin’ are taken to heaven, time zone by time zone. I don’t remember  if he mentioned in which time zone this would start. Is heaven on Eastern  Standard Time? Who the fuck knows.

He did say that at 6 p.m. Saturday (local time around the world) the “saved” would  ascend to heaven. Technically, that hour has come and gone in the Pacific  islands, New Zealand, Australia, and on through east Asia. No word yet about people ascending.

Oh yea, and after that the world will be destroyed  in a variety of ways, including but not limited to: Earthquakes, floods,  syndication of “Dancing with the Star” (known to cause inexplicable mass  suicides), McDonalds new dollar menu (proven to kill slowly)  and Wal-Marts new policy to arm their  greeters.

As usual, other competing Christians complain that Camping is  totally full of shit and the Bible doesn’t support his prophesy at all. For  example, the eBible Fellowship, says on their website: http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/,
that he Bible says the end of the World  will be October 21, 2011. One crazy ass demented religious group calling another  crazy ass demented religious group wrong.

Also, we have the Mayan thing which is sometime in 2012. I can’t  keep track of all of them.

At any rate, It’s a safe bet that since I don’t believe in Jesus  and I don’t think the Bible is from God,  I will not be “taken”.  If so I would have run up my credit cards and taken a shot at a few of women that I secretly lust after. But alas, I am not to be included.

We’ll all have a laugh Sunday, at Camping’s expense.

But, it does give me pause because at some point, one of these  doomsday prophesies is likely to be right.

“Whereas this five-month period will be an enormous horror story for those who have not been raptured, it will be a time of great joy and wonder for those who are raptured,” so saith the prophet Harold.

Of course, Prophet Harold uses a mathematical formula linked to prophecies in the Bible. One time before he predicted Sept. 6, 1994 as Judgment Day, but nothing happened. You’d think that would be enough to dissuade old Harold (and He is old) but no. If anything He is persistent.

Back in ’94, old Hal and his merry band of deluded Bible- tards took out an ad in Reader’s Digest, stating: “The Bible guarantees the end of the world will begin with Judgment Day May 21, 2011.”

Being raised a Jehovah’s Witness, I am no stranger to end of the world predictions. The Jo Hos predicted the end of the world or Armageddon would come seven different times in the 20th century and of course nothing happened. Another loony group of Bible fuck heads and another in a long series of loony prediction that “The Bible guarantees.”

But I digress. Ol’ Harold says that “The Rapture” AKA, “the taking up into heaven of God’s elect people will take place on May 21, 2011 at 6 p.m. local time the rapture will sweep the globe time zone by time zone and that the end of the world as we know it will take place five months later on October 21, 2011.”

So I’m thinking, great! All the religious assholes will be taken to Heaven to be with Jeebus. Fuckin’ A!! Now we can buy liquor on Sunday and we’ll get porn on regular TV! Cool!!

John Lennon finally gets his wish, posthumously. From his song “Imagine”:

Imagine there’s no countries

It isn’t hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace

There is a catch. Old Harold says that after all God’s Chillin’ get taken to heaven, God will destroy the earth. Shit, there’s always a catch.

So, what will happen is what always happens, so saith the prophet ISNRBLOG….not a fucking thing. And come Sunday, all the religious assholes will still be here, I will still have to stock up on booze during the week and get my porn off the net like always.

Fuck you Harold. Oh yea, some people are planning Rapture parties, because as one group of assholes says, quote “skeptics, activists, comedians and others don’t believe his apocalyptic warning for one second.”

Holy shit, COMEDIANS DON’T BELIEVE THIS!! That settles it as far as I’m concerned. Hey, if comedians aren’t convinced, I mean it’s got to be bullshit.

Again, I digress.

Well, my best guess is that I’ll be posting things here as usual, since the Bible is bullshit and so was every nut ball prophesy religious shit heads have spewed about it since it was written. Oh yea, sorry for the infrequency of my posts lately. I have had a few projects lately but they are ending so my psychotic rantings should be coming at a more regular pace.

Try to suppress your impulse to screech with joy.

The “quote” is often attributed to Charles H. Duell, who was Commissioner of Patents in 1899. However,  Duell was, in fact, far from pessimistic about the future of new inventions and patents. He even encouraged Congress to improve the patent system.

It seems evident that some of his comments were taken out of context. There was another Patent Office commissioner whose statements may have been taken out of context. In an 1843 letter to Congress, Henry L. Ellsworth emphasized the rapid growth in the number of patents and stated that he expected patent activity to increase. Somehow, his statements may have been misconstrued.

But still, it illustrates the occasional arrogance of man, when we assume we have “The answer.”

One story, with a similar theme, is true.  The United States District Attorney sued the inventor, Lee De Forest for fraud (in 1913) on behalf of his shareholders, stating that his claim of regeneration was an “absurd” promise. Dr Forest was later acquitted.  We now know that not only was “regeneration” or feedback real, but it is one of the elements of physics that makes radio communication possible.  The problem was that people at the time simply couldn’t understand it. Technology was moving at such a fast pace, it was hard for the common man to keep up.

My point is that no one at that time or today can make an absolute statement about anything.

But that doesn’t stop religious assholes. We have this from WSMV-TV in Nashville”

Here’s the link: http://www.wsmv.com/news/13358825/detail.html

The headline is: “Professor: Science Proves God’s Existence. Proof Comes with “Hard  Nose Physics”, Professor Says.

By TomRandles:

Nashville Tenn: A controversial college physics professor claims he can prove God Exists.

“God is the cosmological singularity. I’m not being blasphemous. I’m just following the ancient tradition that says science put the tenant of religion to the experimental test, and we find God exists,” said Tulane University professor Frank Tipler.

He said he believes his findings are divine.

“It’s coming out not of paleontology or religious mysticism, but hard nose physics, which I like,” he said.

Ignoring the school of thought that science and religion are separate, Tipler uses hard core scientific principles like Einstein’s general relativity and quantum mechanics to make his point.

“What you can show using physics forces this universe to continue to exist. As long as you’re using general relativity and quantum mechanics, you are forced to conclude God exists,” he said.

Some local church leaders have seen Tipler’s presentation, including Hendersonville’s First Baptist Church the Rev. Glenn Weekley.

“That’s good to know and if that be true, and what he says is defensible and true, that’s wonderful. But, I don’t think it makes a lot of difference in the long run in what we believe and why we believe it,” he said.”

So dipshit Tipler says “As long as you’re using general relativity and quantum mechanics, you are forced to conclude God exists.” Do you think Tipler, an avowed Christian is in anyway influenced by his personal belief? Funny, scientists in general do not agree. Although, scientists in general do believe in intelligent design of some sort, there remains not a shred of real proof.

The indisputable fact is that there are no indisputable facts. We simply do not have enough science to prove or disprove anything. For decades science said that life as we know it could not exist without photosynthesis, until they discovered life, thriving deep in the ocean with no light, sustained by chemosynthesis.

Again the pitiful ramblings of the illogical religionists clang like a person banging two pots together as they try to convince everyone else to believe as they do.

Shitheads.

The Witness contend that there the seven world powers of Bible history are Egypt, Assyria, Babylon, Medo-Persia, Greece, Rome and the Anglo-American or England and the United States. Notice the mention of the socialistic “king of the north,” and the statement that “there is no indication in Scripture that the latter will replace the former as an eighth world power before both come to their end”.

The Watchtower further elaborates:

The Watchtower, 12/1/74, page 718: “This “scarlet-colored wild beast” is an eighth “king,” an eighth world power. Since it “springs from the seven,” it is not the Communistic bloc of nations. Also, unlike the Communist bloc, ‘it was (for a while), then was not; it ascends out of the abyss (of inactivity) and goes off into destruction.’

Ok, so now the Jo Ho’s have an eighth world power which “springs from the seven”, but is not the Communistic bloc of nations.

So what does all this crazy bullshit mean? As per usual the Jo Ho’s have their multitudinous,intertwining prophesies, where they fit the square scripture in the round Witness belief hole.

Simply put, there were seven bible world powers, as named above. We are living in the time of the last, the Anglo American world power and Armageddon will come while this world power still dominates. Again note the Witness statement that “there is no indication in Scripture that the latter will replace the former as an eighth world power before both come to their end”.

So, the US will dominate the world until Armageddon comes.

Interestingly, we have this, from the Economist, of 4/1/2011 entitled “Overtaking”:

“NEARLY three-quarters of Americans wish China would “just hurry up and overtake America already,” according to a new survey by The Economist Simulation Unit, published on April 1st. Constant worrying about exactly when the superpower will fall into second place is causing anxiety throughout American society, the survey found. “Will it be 2015? 2020? 2025? I wish it would just happen, and then we could all stop agonizing about it and get back to dentistry,” said Adam Barnes, a dentist from Iowa. The report examines in detail the relationship between the two countries and finds that in some important fields, China has already surpassed America. A summary of the findings is presented below.”

http://www.economist.com/blogs/dailychart/2011/04/united_states_and_china

As a matter of fact, the Drudge Report Headline today is “Rise of The New World Power (Without the US)

So, it looks like the Anglo/American World Power, the United States/England are about to be usurped. But wait! That can’t be! The Witnesses say that there will not be an eighth world power, so Armageddon is upon us.

It’s about damn time. I mean they predicted it seven times in the 20^th Century, three times in my lifetime during my tenure as a Jo Ho and it didn’t happen.

The eighth time might be the charm.

Einstein’s definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, each time hoping for a different result. By that definition, because of believing the Witnesses,  I’m insane by three times.

So, I’ll be sitting here, sipping  my Crown and Seven Up or maybe some Corona, waiting for our Chinese masters to show up at my door and give me my orders. Based on past history that’s a far more likely scenario than Armageddon.

“Oh yea” says the incensed Jo Ho “Just wait!! You’ll be destroyed like all the others!!”

Been there, said that. Have a beer and chill. How do you say “Jehovah” in Chinese? You better learn.

John 3:16, from the King James Version of the Bible:

“For god loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life”

John 3:16, from the New World Translation of the Bible, the Jehovah’s Witness Bible:

“For God loved the world so much that he gave his only-begotten Son, in order that everyone exercising faith in him might not be destroyed but have everlasting life

We’ve all seen assholes holding up signs at ball games with “John 3:16” plastered across it. As an aside, did you ever bother to look it up? I didn’t either, but I already knew what it said. Remember I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and had the Bible jammed down my throat.

Further, we all know the story of how God sent Jesus to earth, the Jews killed him in a horrible way and God resurrected him and he is now presumable back in heaven. So today we have the Christmas and Easter holidays to commemorate this whole series of events.

Jesus was born, we have Christmas. We give gifts, sing holiday and have drunken parties, that often end in female nudity and wanton sex, all admittedly cool things. So then Jesus was killed and resurrected, we have Easter. Jesus was hung on a stake or cross, whichever you choose to believe as there is proof of neither. He died slowly, agonizingly, painfully. So we, in honor of all that celebrate all this by Easter egg hunts, giving kids Easter baskets and chocolate rabbits, but unfortunately not much female nudity and wanton sex.

But did you ever think about the way Jesus died? Now I don’t believe in the Bible and there is scant proof that Jesus ever lived, but humor me. They take this guy, and nail him through his hands and feet to  the cross/stake. Then they hoist him and the stake/cross upright, his body weight supported and resting on the wounds in his hands and feet. He lives for a few hours in agonizing pain and then, for good measure the Roman guards attending him break his legs and pierce his side with a sword.

Have you bible thumpers ever thought of it that way? Likely not. This manner of death was quit common in those days, in fact the Romans and other civilizations had many equally horrible ways to kill people. Look it up.

But the real question for Bible believers is what is the point of this whole exercise? Because “God loved the world” so by sending Jesus to earth, to die such an ignominious death, he demonstrated that love.

I’m sorry, but I don’t get it. When I was a kid, my mother showed she loved me when she gave me a cookie.  My kids and grandkids give me pictures, ties and other stuff. I like e-books, so my family gives me those as gifts to show they love me or at least because they feel some obligation to get me a gift.

If my neighbor, one day, dragged his kid over to my front lawn and yelled to me “This is for you because I love you” and shot his kid in the head, I don’t think that would please, benefit or even entertain me.

But that’s what Christians say God did. Maybe I’m missing something, but after giving this a lot of thought, I don’t get it. I would think that God had a lot of much more less gruesome ways to prove “he loved us”.  Christians believe He gave us all life itself. That’s a pretty cool thing. Killing your Son is perhaps pushing the envelope. Again, a cookie would do, but no. As in all religion and as in the Bible we are presented with things that make no sense in any context.

The Jesus/Crucifixion thing has been ingrained into us so much simply by the exposure we get from  living in a Judeo/Christian Society, most of us never stop to think of the logic involved. But again, it makes no sense.

Oh the Bible gives us some justification, “a perfect life for a perfect life”. This is what the Witnesses say at any rate. Adam, was perfect when he sinned, so a perfect man had to be sacrificed or give his life at what the witnesses call a “corresponding ransom”. Adam sinned, so we all inherited sin, Jesus died to make up for Adams screw up.

So, when does all humanity benefit from Jesus death? We all sure caught hell when Adam sinned, but guess what? You have to “believe in Jesus” to get the benefit of his death. I don’t believe in Jesus, so I don’t get invited to the “sin be gone” party. Fuck, I don’t believe in Adam, but I sure “inherited his imperfection” and am going to die/go to hell as a result of his fuck up. Somehow, this doesn’t seem fair. But hey, we’re talking religion! Nothing makes and sense or in any way can be considered fair.

So, who made that idiotic rule up? Apparently God. But the question remains, does God answer to anyone? Doesn’t he make the rules? Would anyone who believed in God have question a more humane less gruesome “method” of “saving” us?

The Bible is full of this “blood” stuff. The fucking Jews were obsessed with blood. In the Old Testament at the Jewish temple they had a twelve foot in diameter bowl full of blood. Look it up. They did a lot of wierd stuff with blood, like sprinkling it on different thinks for no apparent logical reason. Oh yea, and if your kid pissed you off you could have him stoned to death.

As for “the ranson” it’s a stupid fucking rules that in Jesus case resulted in a brutal execution of a human being for no real reason. It doesn’t make sense in any context.

In reality, I don’t believe in the Bible and don’t think any of this bullshit happened, but if so, is it too late for God to hand out cookies?

I’m catching up on comments.

I see Hillary is still a cunt. Some things never change.